After Lin Jinlou spoke, he fell silent. The room was utterly quiet. After an unknown length of time, the sound of the night watchman striking the third watch came from outside. Xianglan knew Lin Jinlou had not slept at all. She lay there quietly, her mind lingering on the question Lin Jinlou had asked her: "Xianglan, do you still resent me?" Suddenly, her nose stung, and her heart felt as weathered as if it had trekked over countless mountains and rivers, as heavy as if it had weathered many turbulent storms in the misty sea of the world.
The next day, at the stroke of mao hour, Lin Jinlou rose and called for attendants to help him wash and dress. Xianglan silently got up as well. Once they had finished washing, Lin Jinlou ordered a carriage to be prepared and asked for his burnt-fur cloak to be brought. Xianglan hesitated and said, "Eldest Master, are you going out?"
Lin Jinlou gave an affirmative hum, then said to Xianglan, "Change your clothes too, and come with me."
"But Eldest Master, you're injured..."
"It's nothing."
"But..."
"I said it's nothing." Lin Jinlou turned his face and saw Xianglan frowning deeply, so he softened his tone. "I thought about it all night. This trip must be made. Don't ask any more questions. Get ready. We'll be back in at most half an hour."
Xianglan still wanted to ask more, but seeing Lin Jinlou's stern expression and furrowed brow as he summoned Ling Qing and Ling Su to prepare the ink and brushes, and repeatedly urged her to change her clothes, she had no choice. Lin Jinlou had always been decisive, so Xianglan had no option but to change her clothes. Before leaving, they each had a bowl of hot noodle soup, and then they set off.
The sky was still dark, with a full moon hanging obliquely in the night sky. Eight servants carried lanterns on either side, while more than a dozen guards with swords rode on horseback alongside them. The carriage was lined with a thick layer of gray squirrel bedding and a large copper foot-warmer rug, burning pine, cypress, and lily grass. Lin Jinlou sat half-reclining against an ink wash painting cushion, while Xianglan knelt at the other end. She stole a glance at Lin Jinlou, but the dim light in the carriage made it hard to see his expression clearly. She could vaguely tell he was still lost in thought.
After about the time it takes for an incense stick to burn, the carriage stopped. Jixiang approached the carriage, exhaling two puffs of white breath, rubbed his hands together, bent over respectfully, and said, "Eldest Master, we've arrived."
Lin Jinlou gave an affirmative hum. Shuangxi immediately stepped forward to lift the curtain, and the others carefully helped Lin Jinlou out. A servant had already brought a chair, spread with a thick wolf-skin cushion, and helped him sit down. Xianglan looked up and realized they had left the city. Ahead of them was a relay station, where two men stood in a long pavilion, holding wine cups as if bidding farewell. Looking more closely, she saw that the man facing her wore a half-new indigo woolen cloak and a white fox-fur hat. Against the backdrop of emerald pines and cypresses, he appeared tall and elegant, exuding an air of grace. It was none other than Song Ke.
Their eyes met unintentionally, and Song Ke immediately froze in disbelief. Xianglan was also startled, covering her mouth with her hand and unconsciously taking half a step back. She then lowered her head to look at Lin Jinlou.
Lin Jinlou sat in the master's chair, his lips pressed together, holding a plum-orchid-chrysanthemum hand warmer. The biting cold wind whipped the black fox fur on his hat, making his face beneath it appear even paler and more listless. Seeing Xianglan looking at him, he smiled and said, "Go and see him. It's the last time. I might as well be a good person for once. In the future, with mountains and rivers separating us, even if you grew wings, you wouldn't be able to meet again."
Xianglan blinked, staring blankly at Lin Jinlou, feeling as if she had misheard.At once, Shuangxi lifted her skirts and scurried forward to fetch Song Ke. The one bidding farewell to Song Ke was none other than Lin Jinting, who gaped in astonishment, looking from Song Ke to Lin Jinlou. He rubbed his hands together and was about to approach when a glare from Lin Jinlou rooted him to the spot.
Jixiang handed Xianglan a parcel wrapped in blue satin, whispering, "The Eldest Master knows you are a sincere and honest person who repays kindness. This is what he prepared for you."
Xianglan took it and unfolded the cloth, finding a thick stack of banknotes and two gold ingots inside. Startled again, she turned to look back. Lin Jinlou remained seated like a wax statue, holding a hand warmer, his face expressionless. Xianglan turned away, feeling her eyes grow warm. When she lifted her head again, Song Ke had already approached and halted a foot away from her, cupping his hands in a salute. "Thank you, General Lin, for coming to see me off."
Lin Jinlou coughed twice and said with a faint smile, "Brother Yi Fei, you are too kind. I am injured and cannot rise to greet you properly—please forgive my discourtesy. My wife has repeatedly received your great kindness. Her benefactor is my benefactor, so it is only right that I come to express my gratitude."
Before he finished speaking, a tall woman emerged from one of the three carriages parked outside the pavilion. Clad in a silver-white cloak and carrying a young child in her arms, she strode directly toward them.
Xianglan saw that it was Zheng Jingxian. Now, after her family’s great upheaval—her father’s suicide in prison, her mother’s death from illness two days prior, the confiscation of her maternal family’s property, and the unknown fate of her siblings—Zheng Jingxian appeared haggard and emaciated, nearly wasted away. Yet her back remained straight, and the pride and spirit in her face were undiminished.
Lin Jinlou nodded slightly and was the first to smile. "Cousin, you’ve come." Xianglan also curtsied in greeting.
Zheng Jingxian only bowed to Lin Jinlou, saying, "Cousin, it’s good to see you." She then glanced at Xianglan and remarked with a laugh, "Oh, you’re here too. People in the capital say the Concubine of Master Lin has great influence, and now it seems true. I suppose you and Cousin have been lately affectionate and harmonious, unlike your previous aggrieved demeanor."
Lin Jinlou, ever sharp, did not wait for Xianglan to respond and chuckled, "Bring your son over for me to see. I haven’t met the little fellow yet." Zheng Jingxian took two steps forward, coaxing the child, "Be good, call him Uncle." The child, about two years old, had a fair, chubby face and large, bright eyes that darted about, looking clever and adorable as jade and snow. He did not speak, only sucking his finger and staring at Lin Jinlou.
Lin Jinlou untied a jade pendant adorned with a five-colored tassel from his waist and handed it to Zheng Jingxian. "I came in haste; consider this a humble greeting gift."
Zheng Jingxian accepted it with a smile. "Then I shall not refuse your generosity." She glanced at Xianglan and added, "Later, have Sister Xianglan bear you a little one as well. I know several physicians who specialize in difficult ailments and nurturing health."
Song Ke could not help but frown. Rumors had circulated vaguely that Xianglan, harmed by the Jiang sisters, would struggle to conceive in the future. Zheng Jingxian’s intentional or unintentional jab was sure to unsettle Lin Jinlou. Sure enough, Lin Jinlou laughed and said, "Look at this cousin—more concerned about my heirs than our Madam. But then, as a married woman, you’re less restrained in speech than when you were a maiden."
Song Ke said to Zheng Jingxian, "General Lin came specifically to see us off. Why speak of such things? The young master’s face is red from the cold; you should take him back to the carriage."Zheng Jingxian knew Song Ke had helped her out of an awkward situation and said, "Slap my mouth, slap my mouth—that was a slip of the tongue. Cousin, please don’t laugh at me."
Lin Jinlou merely smiled faintly and said to Xianglan, "Step aside for a moment. I have a few words to say to Brother Yi Fei in private."
Zheng Jingxian could not linger any longer. Carrying her child, she prepared to return to the carriage. Xianglan followed behind her. Zheng Jingxian asked, "Why are you following me?"
Xianglan replied, "Isn’t Madam Song also in the carriage? It’s been a long time since I’ve seen her. Out of courtesy and reason, I should go and pay my respects to her."
Zheng Jingxian gritted her teeth, turned around with her child, and left. After boarding her carriage, she lifted the curtain slightly and saw Xianglan enter Madam Song’s carriage. After a while, it was Song Ke’s mother who personally escorted her out. The two held each other’s hands tightly, and Madam Song repeatedly wiped away tears. Xianglan comforted her for a while before they finally bid each other farewell.
Meanwhile, Lin Jinlou ordered someone to pour a cup of warm wine for Song Ke. He lowered his head to stroke the warmer, then looked up. The two men locked eyes for a moment before Song Ke smiled faintly and said, "I wonder what words General Lin has for me."
Lin Jinlou curled his lips and said, "No need for all that tedious and pretentious politeness. We both know very well—you don’t like seeing me, and I don’t enjoy seeing you either."
Song Ke raised his eyebrows and asked, "Then why has General Lin come here today…"
"It’s all because of that stubborn girl, Xianglan. She’s always regarded you as her benefactor. If I hadn’t brought her, I’m afraid she would have carried this unease in her heart for the rest of her life. I’ve already said it earlier—her benefactor is my benefactor. If she wants to repay your kindness, I’ll do it alongside her."
Song Ke was taken aback, smiled, and lowered his head.
Lin Jinlou said in a deep voice, "Besides, I really should thank you. If you hadn’t saved her back then, who knows where Zhao Yuechan might have sold her." He took a letter from his pocket and handed it over, saying, "This is for you."
Song Ke looked up and asked, "This is…"
Lin Jinlou explained, "General Yang, who is stationed at the border in Guizhou, is an old acquaintance of mine. He owes me a small favor. Take this letter and go to him. He’s a righteous man and will look out for you. Guizhou is plagued by bandits these days. With a general watching your back, you can continue serving as the county magistrate. Additionally, I’ll send a few guards to escort you and your family along the way. Don’t be a stubborn scholar and refuse this offer out of pride. Your mother, wife, and children are traveling with you. You know very well how treacherous the journey is—if you insist on being haughty…"
"Thank you, General Lin." Before Lin Jinlou could finish, Song Ke took the letter, clasped his hands, and said, "I am grateful for your kindness and will not disappoint you."
Lin Jinlou narrowed his eyes, waved his hand, and smiled. He sighed and said, "Good. You’re more impressive than I thought."
Song Ke’s face still wore a faint smile, but as he looked down at the letter, his smile faded and gradually turned into a bitter one. He said softly, "I sincerely hope you will love her well and cherish her."
Lin Jinlou was taken aback and waved his hand impatiently, saying, "I like her very much."
Song Ke looked up and said, "That’s not the same. Liking is merely a pastime; love is a treasure held close to the heart."
Lin Jinlou fell silent, narrowing his eyes slightly as he looked at him. Song Ke turned his face away, gazing at a distant pine tree, and said, "She values her dignity and self-respect too much to ever consent to being a concubine. No matter how much I longed to keep her, I had to let her go, because only then would she be happy. She is such a remarkable person, having endured so much hardship. I implore you, General, not to possess her merely because you are captivated by her beauty, but to love her for her character and be willing to give for her sake… or to let her be happy."Lin Jinlou remained silent, raising his head to gaze at the drifting clouds in the sky. Suddenly, he spoke: "Song Yi Fei, your flaw lies in being soft-hearted when you should be ruthless, and indecisive when you should yield. Once you’ve made a choice, you struggle to overcome the barriers in your heart. Only when you become resolute will you achieve something remarkable."
After these words, neither had more to say. With matters settled thus, Song Ke took his leave. On his way back, he happened to meet Xianglan. Song Ke halted, his throat tightening as he cupped his hands in a salute. After a long pause, he finally murmured, "How have you been?"
Xianglan replied softly, "I am well." After a moment’s hesitation, she added, "The journey to Guizhou is long and arduous. You must take good care of yourself."
Silence fell between them, broken only by the sound of the wind. Suddenly, Song Ke spoke again: "After I take up my post in Guizhou, I will work diligently to be a good official."
Xianglan looked at him in surprise, then nodded with a faint smile. "Having lived two lives and studied the classics so earnestly, you have always sought to apply your learning to governance. You will surely be a good official."
Song Ke shook his head. "No, I will not." He sighed deeply. "I studied only to bring glory to my family and revive our fortunes—for rank, honor, and wealth. That is why, when faced with setbacks, I grew impatient for success, sought high positions, and prided myself on my cleverness, believing that one day everything would be as I wished. Yet fate played tricks on me, and each time I suffered bitterly. Though I despise Lin Jinlou, I am not his equal. He has risked life and limb to defend our country—what have I accomplished all these years? Before submitting my request for the Guizhou post, I reflected deeply. I no longer seek fame or rank; I only wish to do more practical deeds for the people. Even if I spend my entire life in remote borderlands, I will be at peace so long as I can act with integrity before heaven and earth, live up to the hardships of studying the classics, and honor the trials I’ve endured across two lifetimes."
Xianglan’s heart trembled. She gathered her skirts and bowed deeply. "For these words alone, I offer you my utmost respect."
Song Ke smiled bitterly, his gaze fixed on Xianglan. "It is a pity I realized this truth too late. Otherwise, back then, I would never have…"
Xianglan shook her head. "Both our lives have been marked by great ups and downs. At times, I too wonder why fate is so unkind, why heaven treats me this way. How wonderful it would be to live without worries. But without being tempered and stripped of vanity, one cannot view the world with humility and grace. In this life, not everything goes as we wish. There are things we dislike yet must do; there are people we cherish yet must part from. Gatherings and separations are unpredictable, the world is turbulent, and when we cannot change things, we must endure. I used to dislike the word ‘endurance,’ but now I understand that true gold is forged through a hundred trials. Endure the darkness, and dawn will come; endure the harsh winter, and spring will arrive. Those hardships we once thought unbearable now seem like calm waters in memory." She looked at Song Ke and whispered, "Let it go."
Song Ke’s heart quivered, and tears welled up in his eyes. He struggled to hold them back, and in his vision, Xianglan became a blurred silhouette.Zheng Jingxian sat in the carriage and let out a deep sigh. She was not a petty person, but how could she be magnanimous toward the woman her husband could never forget? Chen Xianglan was a thorn embedded in her heart, disturbing her peace every day. It was especially painful when she saw Song Ke's polite yet lukewarm demeanor toward her—so different from the tender affection that once shone in his eyes when he looked at Xianglan. Since Song Tanchai entered the palace, Song Ke had grown increasingly distant. She couldn't help but quarrel and make scenes, yet the two had gradually become like strangers. Now that her supportive maternal family had declined, she deeply feared Song Ke would abandon her. How could she allow it? She had given him such profound love—he was now her only anchor and warmth. Watching her husband exchange glances with that woman, she could bear it no longer. She lifted the curtain and rushed out, nearly stumbling from the carriage, crying out, "Husband!" Her voice was sharp and sorrowful.
Startled, Song Ke turned and saw Zheng Jingxian staggering toward him.
Xianglan smiled faintly, bowed to Song Ke once more, and said, "Though mountains rise and rivers flow, let us each treasure ourselves from now on." Gracefully, she rose and departed.
Song Ke stepped forward to steady Zheng Jingxian, then glanced back—only to catch a glimpse of Xianglan's slender retreating figure. Lowering his head, he said, "Let's return. It's time to depart." He looked back once more and saw Xianglan had already reached Lin Jinlou's side.
Back in the carriage, observing Zheng Jingxian's anxious expression, Song Ke felt a sudden surge of melancholy. He exhaled deeply. Yes, it was time to let go. He reached out, covering and holding Zheng Jingxian's hand, and said, "Don't let your thoughts run wild. You are my wife, and I will never abandon you. We must live out our days together, long and enduring." Zheng Jingxian's heart eased, yet she couldn't suppress a sob, burying her face in Song Ke's shoulder as tears streamed down her cheeks.
Standing behind Lin Jinlou, Xianglan watched the Song family carriage creak away along the official road. Only then did the tears she had struggled to hold back begin to fall, drop by drop. Song Ke—her husband in a past life, a passerby in this life, a frequent guest in her tender memories. But a guest, after all, cannot linger forever. Song Ke, farewell. With this parting, like fleeting clouds under the bright sun, like the moon at the ends of the earth, she had finally sent this guest on his way.
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