After dealing with the commoners, Yan Shang returned to his residence, his mind unsettled. Since his eyes had become like this, whether to light a lamp at night no longer mattered, so he sat in the darkness, lost in thought.
That fiancé, referred to as "Lord Pei," must be Pei Qing, Mu Wan Yao's future Imperial Son-in-Law.
Yan Shang's thoughts drifted to the afternoon when she had approached him after he descended from the platform, draping a cloak over him. Her hand rested on the nape of his neck, gently stroking it. She leaned into his embrace, her eyelashes lightly brushing against his neck.
His body seemed to remember her completely. As if the moment she drew near, even before he could react, his body had already awakened.
Yan Shang then recalled an earlier time, when they reunited on the mountain path, and the look in her eyes as she watched him appear.
He felt somewhat annoyed with people like Yun Shu and Han Shu Xing, who must have known it was Mu Wan Yao all along. Perhaps they had been threatened by her, and none of them told him.
So he remained unaware that she was right beside him.
She stood by his side, watching him.
The more he dwelled on these thoughts, the more sorrowful Yan Shang felt. He propped his forehead with one hand, his heart aching fiercely. He sensed the changes in Mu Wan Yao—three years ago, how could she have quietly watched him without teasing him? She had changed, grown up, matured.
She now understood what she could approach and what she could not.
And all of this came at the bloody cost of growth.
Setting aside the brief surge of excitement and joy from recognizing her that afternoon, by nightfall, Yan Shang was overwhelmed with sorrow, tormenting himself with these thoughts. The more he thought, the more he hated himself; the more he thought, the more he felt her quiet maturity was his fault.
If not for him, she would still be lively and playful, still proud and spirited...
He had always hated himself for appearing in Mu Wan Yao's life, causing her to suffer yet another emotional wound. Especially on this night, he despised his own flaws even more.
When she suddenly appeared, rather than feeling overwhelming joy, Yan Shang was consumed by self-denial and torment.
So he reinforced to himself that he must not approach her, must not influence her again.
Someone like him was utterly unworthy of liking a young lady, of stirring any emotions, or receiving any love. He should never have caused Mu Wan Yao sorrow. Now that she had Pei Qing, the Imperial Son-in-Law who treated her well, he ought to stay far away from her—
Yan Shang had recognized Mu Wan Yao but said nothing, pretending he still didn't know. Yun Shu and the others worked hard every day to conceal that the person was Mu Wan Yao, putting on an act, and Yan Shang remained silent.
There was no need for him to say anything anyway.
Because the next day, he caught a severe cold, burning with fever, and fell ill.
While having breakfast with Mu Wan Yao, Pei Qing brought up the matter of leaving Nanyang.
Mu Wan Yao was lost in thought and only heard him after he repeated it twice. She said, "Didn't you want to observe Yan Shang properly? You've only watched him for two days, and you don't want to anymore?"
Pei Qing, in low spirits, replied self-mockingly, "Yesterday, I saw Yan Erlang praying for clear skies in the rain. He sat there for three full hours, with all the commoners watching him, and Your Highness watching him too... I no longer wish to observe. I know I cannot compare. Staying any longer might only bring humiliation upon myself."
He murmured blankly, "...Before coming here, I thought he was just seeking fame. I never expected he was truly such a person."
Mu Wan Yao lowered her head to sip her tea, thinking to herself, "How could someone I once liked not be good?"She had always been rather indifferent toward Pei Qing; no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't muster even a hint of enthusiasm for him. She used to wonder what was wrong with herself, often feeling inexplicably annoyed with Pei Qing... Yet today, when Pei Qing praised Yan Shang so highly, Mu Wan Yao surprisingly felt a rare sense of delight toward him.
Pei Qing urged Mu Wan Yao again to leave Nanyang with him.
Mu Wan Yao hesitated inwardly and remained silent.
She thought to herself that she ought to leave, because yesterday, when she draped clothes over Yan Shang and drew close to him, her heartbeat had been louder than the rain. It was her heart, calm for three years, suddenly pounding so fiercely again. Mu Wan Yao had been horrified at that moment, afraid that if she stayed any longer, she wouldn't be able to let go of Yan Shang.
For now, she could still control herself, but she truly feared that in a couple of days, she would lose that control.
Yet Mu Wan Yao was unwilling to leave. Because she was concerned about Yan Shang's eyes.
If she didn't see his eyes regain sight, her heart would be filled with self-reproach. Three years had passed, and she began to reflect on the harm the prison ordeal had inflicted on his health. She always felt she bore some responsibility for having been negligent... As Mu Wan Yao remained silent, Pei Qing's heart couldn't help but grow cold.
Mu Wan Yao hesitated and said, "Wait for me to write a letter and find a renowned physician to come here. Then we'll leave first..."
Just as Pei Qing was about to rejoice, the maid Qiu Si hurried in from outside. From behind the curtain, Qiu Si said anxiously, "Madam, Yan Erlang has fallen ill."
Mu Wan Yao immediately stood up. Thus, she neither prepared to leave nor to pack her belongings. Instead, surrounded by her maids, she went to see Yan Shang. Pei Qing rose to his feet, watching her depart so swiftly. He stood there dazed for a long while, his heart utterly dejected—
When Yan Shang woke up, he felt drenched in sweat all over. But he was so exhausted that he didn't want to move a single finger, preferring to rest a while longer before getting up to bathe.
And so he lay quietly. After all, whether his eyes were open or closed, everything was darkness to him.
He wasn't one to abandon himself to despair. Over the past month, he had learned to grow accustomed to keeping company with darkness. Moreover, being unable to see actually allowed him to calm his mind and ponder more deeply...
Yan Shang lay there lost in thought.
Suddenly, he caught the scent of a young woman's perfume. Startled, his entire body tensed. The next moment, he felt the bed dip as someone sat down beside him. Yan Shang was taken aback, beginning to feel that not being able to see was rather inconvenient.
He had no idea how long Mu Wan Yao had been sitting there—he had only noticed her now... As his emotions churned, he suddenly felt someone take hold of his finger.
He stiffened, wrestled with his thoughts for a moment, and decided to let her be. He would pretend not to know—
Mu Wan Yao had been sitting there watching Yan Shang for two hours.
His fever had broken by evening, and the servants had fed him some porridge, all while Mu Wan Yao watched intently. After the servants left, she continued to watch Yan Shang as he slept. Sitting by his bedside, observing him sleep, she found she didn't feel the slightest bit bored.
He was truly still. When he slept, he didn't move at all, not even turning over, which often made Mu Wan Yao wonder whether he had fainted or was merely asleep.
Yet, no matter how handsome a person is, watching them for two hours would eventually grow tiresome.Mu Wan Yao struggled inwardly for a long time, thinking that since he was asleep anyway, she still wanted to touch him. The moment she resolved to do so, she cheered herself on internally and sat down on the bed. She reached toward his slender fingers, first taking his hand in hers and playing with them one by one.
Yan Shang felt helpless, thinking: Fine... it's just the hand anyway.
But Mu Wan Yao soon grew unsatisfied.
Yan Shang’s waist stiffened as he felt the girl’s soft fingers rest on his waist through the thin undergarment. Mu Wan Yao extended her thumb and middle finger, measuring a length, her fingers lingering around his waist...
A blush spread across Yan Shang’s face, his waist growing increasingly rigid under her touch. He had to force himself to keep pretending to be asleep... until he heard Mu Wan Yao’s soft, hushed voice: “Your waist is so slender.”
Yan Shang froze, as if struck by a sudden blow.
Her voice was soft and slightly hoarse—a sound he hadn’t heard in three years.
Mu Wan Yao added discontentedly: “Even slimmer than before. You’ve really lost so much weight.”
Then she preened with self-satisfaction: “But my waist is still slimmer than yours.”
Yan Shang: “...”
He pursed his lips, suppressing a smile. His face reddened further as he wondered what she was thinking... No, he shouldn’t think that way—he should be questioning how she could toy with him like this.
She was already betrothed—how could she stay so long in another man’s room and tease him like this?
Lost in these tangled thoughts, Yan Shang suddenly felt Mu Wan Yao lean down and embrace him. His fingers twitched involuntarily as he felt her delicate, fluid-like body melt into his arms. Yan Shang grew flustered and began regretting his decision to feign sleep.
He should find the right moment to wake up... He couldn’t let Mu Wan Yao continue this mischief.
Yet amid this inner turmoil, Yan Shang’s eyes widened beneath the white gauze, and a flicker of longing surged in his heart. He wanted to see her... to know what she looked like now.
But his eyes could no longer see—he couldn’t even catch a glimpse of her. And by the time his vision recovered, she would surely be gone.
He would never get to see her.
Mu Wan Yao buried her face in Yan Shang’s chest, her arms wrapped around his waist. Breathing in his scent, she felt a wave of contentment. Everyone had their own unique scent, and Yan Shang’s was light and fresh, like sunshine or the sea...
Mu Wan Yao suddenly paused.
Beneath her cheek, she heard an intensely rapid heartbeat.
Each beat faster and fiercer than the last.
Mu Wan Yao lifted her face in disbelief. She saw Yan Shang lying motionless, but the blush on his face... He was pretending to sleep!
Frowning, Mu Wan Yao felt a surge of displeasure.
He... had such a strong reaction to a strange woman’s closeness?
Lewd!
Filthy!
Disgusting!
Unfaithful... to his vows!
Wasn’t he about to get married? How could his body react so intensely to a woman other than his fiancée?
Mu Wan Yao sprang up abruptly, shoving him away. She stood coldly by the bedside, glaring furiously at the man pretending to sleep for a long moment before turning and leaving—
From then on, Mu Wan Yao paid no more visits to Yan Shang.
But she still wrote a letter to Chang’an, requesting that a renowned ophthalmologist from the Imperial Medical Bureau come to Nanyang under her name to treat his eyes.The rain in Nanyang had ceased. Furious with Yan Shang, Mu Wan Yao indignantly began shouting for servants to pack their belongings, preparing to leave Nanyang. While Pei Qing was naturally delighted without needing mention, Yan Shang’s side did not attempt to stop them either. Instead, he sent someone to ask if the two honored guests would like any local specialties from Nanyang, offering to have some delivered to them.
His goodwill reached the doorstep of their chamber, only to be entirely rejected by Mu Wan Yao.
Mu Wan Yao said coldly, "I don’t need his fake kindness!"
That evening, Mu Wan Yao sat in the garden, lost in thought due to an inexplicable melancholy. She had no idea how long she had been sitting there, watching as the sky gradually darkened, lanterns were lit throughout the estate, and a layer of chilly night mist enveloped the mansion. Thick fog swirled, and clouds seemed to surge along the corridors.
After sitting for a long time, her maid Qiu Si, who had been standing behind her, began to feel her limbs growing numb. Just as she was about to urge the princess to return, Mu Wan Yao, who had been sitting motionless, blinked and turned her gaze in a certain direction.
Mu Wan Yao and her maid saw Yan Shang approaching from the other end of the corridor.
He was unaccompanied by any servants, making his way alone while leaning against walls and pillars for support. His light spring robe fluttered gently in the night breeze, and his face remained as gentle and refined as ever, even as he frequently stumbled over the steps.
Yan Shang walked with extreme caution, but in such a large courtyard, having been blind for only a month, he was still unfamiliar with every corner. Just as he was about to trip over another step, someone suddenly steadied his left arm, holding it firmly. A delicate hand pressed against his wrist, fingers slender and warm.
Yan Shang stiffened and tried to pull away.
Mu Wan Yao did not let him retreat, gripping his arm tightly. She shot a glance at Qiu Si, who then spoke on her behalf: "Sir, do not be alarmed. It is us. Our lady was resting in the courtyard and happened to see you approaching. Noticing you were about to fall, she came to offer support."
Qiu Si, voicing her own curiosity, asked: "But sir, where are your attendants? Is it wise for you to come out alone? It’s so late—where are you headed?"
Mu Wan Yao, still holding Yan Shang’s arm, gave Qiu Si an approving look: well asked. This was exactly what she wanted to know.
Yan Shang composed himself. Knowing it was Mu Wan Yao supporting him made him even more uncomfortable, and he began to doubt whether his clothes were properly arranged or if there was any other impropriety. But he quickly dismissed these distracting thoughts, inwardly chiding himself for his lack of composure.
Yan Shang replied softly, "It’s nothing serious. I suddenly remembered some official business and thought of going to the county office. It’s not far from here. I sent Yun Shu to deliver a message, so I thought I might try to make my way to the county office on my own."
He added sheepishly, "It seems I overestimated myself and have disturbed you, madam. I should just return to my room."
Under Mu Wan Yao’s meaningful gaze, Qiu Si quickly interjected, "There’s no need for that, sir! Since it’s not far, we can accompany you to the county office."
Yan Shang tried to decline, but Mu Wan Yao insisted. Unable to refuse, he had no choice but to accept.
And so, with Mu Wan Yao supporting his arm, they made their way toward the estate’s main gate.
No matter how strangely the servants along the way looked at them, Qiu Si merely followed behind the pair, grinning cheerfully and shooing away anyone who tried to disturb the princess and Yan Erlang. At fifteen, she was at her most lively and youthful age. Watching her princess supporting Yan Erlang, their shadows falling side by side along the corridor, Qiu Si found the sight utterly delightful.
The princess, elegant and dignified; Yan Erlang, clear-spirited and noble-boned.
Such a perfect match—how could anyone be allowed to disrupt them?Qiu Si was different from Chunhua and Xiarong before her; she had never witnessed Mu Wan Yao's most difficult times, only seen the princess's rising power and influence. Thus, in Qiu Si's eyes, the princess need not defer to anyone—she did as she pleased.
She never believed the princess would be constrained by having an Imperial Son-in-Law. The princess was the ultimate authority; even if married, she could keep male companions without regard for her husband. Besides, the princess wasn't even wed yet!—
With their own thoughts, they left the residence in an oddly tense atmosphere.
Yan Shang's arm, supported by Mu Wan Yao, had gone numb. He pretended not to recognize her the whole way, while racking his brains to think of how to dissuade her. Yet Mu Wan Yao was delighted, likely finding it amusing to guide a blind person, so she took her role seriously and grew fond of the feeling.
Noticing Mu Wan Yao's enjoyment, Yan Shang smiled wryly, feeling that his blindness had provided her with some form of entertainment.
She pretended to be mute, avoided acknowledging him, and secretly teased him playfully.
As they were about to exit the residence, Qiu Si hummed a tune and casually glanced around, signaling the obstructive servants to step aside and not block the princess's path. Unexpectedly, her casual glance caught sight of swaying vegetation reflected on the wall by the gate, and amidst the rustling leaves, a snake slithered higher, its tongue flickering.
Qiu Si let out a sharp scream, jumping in fright: "A snake! There's a snake! Help—"
Mu Wan Yao didn't see any snake, but she was startled by her maid's piercing shriek. She screamed too, her whole body trembling as she gripped Yan Shang's hand tightly. Her cry carried a sob, and she jumped up alongside Qiu Si.
Qiu Si, terrified, could only retreat far away, but Mu Wan Yao had Yan Shang by her side.
Screaming, Mu Wan Yao threw herself into Yan Shang's arms, clinging to him and whimpering in fear.
The successive sharp screams of the girls ringing in his ears made Yan Shang's eardrums tingle. Then, as Mu Wan Yao buried herself in his embrace, shaking with fear and crying out, "Snake! Snake!", he held her, his hand stroking her back gently, soothing her softly: "There, there, don't cry..."
He tilted his head, aware that servants were nearby, and asked, "Is there a snake in the grass?"
When the two girls screamed one after another, servants had been startled and rushed over. Qiu Si darted several yards away, while one servant cautiously entered the grass, searched for a while, and then said helplessly, "Sir, it's just a branch."
Qiu Si, hugging a pillar and peeking out from behind it, shouted, "Are you sure? I really saw a snake!"
Hearing this, Mu Wan Yao in Yan Shang's arms clutched his robe tighter and shuddered again.
Yan Shang continued to stroke her back, amused by her lingering fear. "How could there be a snake? Don't be afraid, it's nothing... I'm here with you."
The servants exchanged glances, their expressions odd as they watched their master comforting the young lady from another household. But they couldn't say anything, so they awkwardly withdrew. Only Qiu Si remained behind the pillar, stroking her fragile heart and muttering to herself: There must have been a snake.Yan Shang held Mu Wan Yao at the mansion entrance, coaxing her softly for a long while before she finally lifted her face from his embrace. After sobbing for some time, she was about to speak to him when she felt his body suddenly stiffen, his expression turning somewhat unnatural.
Mu Wan Yao realized belatedly: Ah, right—he was holding her.
His arm around her grew rigid as he murmured, "My apologies."
He resumed his proper demeanor and gently tried to push her away. Mu Wan Yao remained silent, gripping his arm stubbornly. Yan Shang turned his face aside; though he couldn’t see her, he could imagine her suddenly defiant expression.
He whispered, "I know… I know you’ve been frightened and need someone with you… but this… it’s improper. I’ll fetch your betrothed for you now—"
Mu Wan Yao grew irritable: She didn’t want Pei Qing!
If Pei Qing appeared now, she’d be furious!
Just as the two were locked in this struggle, Pei Qing’s voice came from the direction of the mansion entrance, strained with anger: "What are you doing?"
Pei Qing had entered from outside and saw Yan Shang holding the princess, speaking softly to her. Such intimacy—how utterly inappropriate!—
Yan Shang snapped back to reality, turning his gaze blankly toward the entrance.
Mu Wan Yao still clung to his arm, unmoving for reasons unknown. Yan Shang heard her let out what seemed like a sob, as if she hadn’t yet recovered from her earlier distress.
Hearing Pei Qing’s footsteps approaching, Yan Shang tensed instantly, his heart flustered.
He gripped Mu Wan Yao’s arm and pulled her behind him. Facing Pei Qing as he strode closer, Yan Shang’s lips stiffened, his voice placatingly soft: "Young Master Pei, please calm down. Things aren’t as they appear… The lady was frightened by a snake. I saw her distress and couldn’t help comforting her. This has nothing to do with her—"
Mu Wan Yao, bewildered, allowed herself to be pulled behind Yan Shang. Hearing him abruptly switch from addressing her as "madam" to "lady," she blinked in surprise.
Pei Qing fumed: "Step aside!"
Yan Shang retreated but refused to let Pei Qing take Mu Wan Yao away. Detecting the fury in Pei Qing’s tone, he feared the other man might harm Mu Wan Yao over what he had witnessed.
Though consumed with shame, Yan Shang insisted firmly: "It truly has nothing to do with the lady. As the saying goes, seeing isn’t always believing—"
Mu Wan Yao finally regained her senses.
Hiding behind Yan Shang, her arm still in his grasp, she listened as his explanations only fueled Pei Qing’s anger. A mischievous smile touched her lips as she peeked out from behind Yan Shang, curiously watching the two men—one trying to take her away, the other refusing to let her go.
Pei Qing snapped: "Yan Erlang, what could I possibly do to harm her?"
Yan Shang froze.
Then he heard Mu Wan Yao’s teasing laugh right against his back.
In that instant, Yan Shang understood and realized what he had done.
Indeed, what could Pei Qing do to Mu Wan Yao? She was no ordinary maiden—she was a princess. An Imperial Son-in-Law who hadn’t yet married into… or rather, wedded… or formally been accepted into the imperial household—no matter how enraged he might be at seeing the princess entangled with another man, what could he actually do to her?
It was Yan Shang’s own disordered heart that had mistaken Mu Wan Yao for a common girl, fearing Pei Qing might scold or strike her, prompting him to shield her from Pei Qing’s reach.
Such thoughts were utterly absurd.Yan Shang was too ashamed to speak, standing frozen in place. Pei Qing, seeing that he had finally come to his senses, felt a pang of bitterness in his heart and sighed.
Pei Qing couldn't help but wonder: How deep must have been the affection between Yan Erlang and Her Highness the Princess in the past, for Yan Erlang to forget Princess Mu Wan Yao's status?
How could Yan Erlang, in a moment of uncontrollable emotions, treat a princess with the same attitude as an ordinary young lady?
Would the princess not accuse him of overstepping his bounds? Would she allow Yan Erlang to get so close to her?—
Pei Qing couldn't help but think that his own marriage with the princess... was probably, probably not going to happen—
Returning to her quarters, Mu Wan Yao sat down to drink tea, lost in thought.
Pei Qing stood nearby, quietly advising her to keep her distance from Yan Erlang.
Mu Wan Yao snapped impatiently, "Stop nagging. Be quiet."
She rested her fingers on her forehead, feeling that something was amiss. Pei Qing had been chattering in her ear the whole way, constantly interrupting her train of thought, making it impossible for her to pinpoint what felt wrong.
Now that Pei Qing had fallen silent, Mu Wan Yao could finally ponder carefully.
Yan Shang's attitude toward her... was off.
She hadn't paid much attention before, but now it struck her: tonight, he had held her, had comforted her almost involuntarily... This was how he treated Mu Wan Yao, not how he would treat an ordinary young woman.
Thinking back further... his subtle distancing from her, yet his inexplicable attention. When he was ill and she held him, his heartbeat had been so frantic... And even earlier, on that rainy day when she draped clothes over him, he had embraced her tightly.
Mu Wan Yao let out a soft "ah," suddenly enlightened: so his "odd behavior" had started that long ago.
So... Yan Shang had recognized her!
Mu Wan Yao abruptly stood up, startling Pei Qing. With a dark expression, she strode out, and Pei Qing hurried after her: "Your Highness, where are you going now?"
Mu Wan Yao gritted her teeth, sharpening her metaphorical blade: "To find Yan Shang!"
Pei Qing: "..."
Pei Qing was nearly frantic: "Didn't you two just finish your intimate display in front of me? Why must you go find him again?"
Mu Wan Yao hesitated, feeling she might be overdoing it, and paused at the door to explain: "I just realized he's been deceiving me..."
Pei Qing's eyes lit up slightly, saying, "Then Your Highness should hurry and find him."
Mu Wan Yao: "..."——
Yan Shang had intended to go to the county office, but because of the incident involving Mu Wan Yao that evening, he ended up not going and returned instead to his own quarters.
His mind was unsettled. Though he tried to convince himself that Mu Wan Yao, as a princess, would be unaffected, he couldn't help worrying that she might face reprimands from Pei Qing. She cared so much for Pei Qing—if because of him, Pei Qing refused to marry her, how heartbroken she would be...
"Bang," the door was pushed open.
Mu Wan Yao's voice was sharp: "Yan Shang!"
Yan Shang looked up, stood, and frowned softly. He said quietly, "I've thought it over. Why don't you shift the blame onto me? Say I acted improperly, forced you, tried to hold you... That way, he won't blame you. It's better not to mention the snake—too many factors just make it less believable..."
He rambled on for a while before belatedly realizing something was off and gradually trailed off.
He heard Mu Wan Yao's cold laugh.
Yan Shang remained silent for a long moment before murmuring, "What did you say?"
Mu Wan Yao scoffed, "Stop pretending. Didn't you recognize who I am?"
Yan Shang was instantly speechless.
He lowered his eyes, thinking he hadn't spoken, but his faint whisper, tender and lingering, brushed against Mu Wan Yao's ear, making it burn: "... Yao Yao."
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