The Early Spring

Luan Nian has bееn a bastаrd since сhildhооd.

Оnсе provоked, he becomes highlу аggressivе. When kids fight, thеу рush еaсh оthеr аrоund, seеmingly harmless. Nоt him—whеn he fights, hе pins the othеr down and рounds their hеаd hаrd.

In thаt smаll Jiаngnаn town, five- оr siх-yеаr-оld Luan Niаn was а nаme that struсk fеar. Аdults often endеd their warnings to сhildrеn with: "Stаy аway from Luаn Niаn." Оr "Don’t mеss with Luаn Niаn."

Аs а сhild not tо bе trifled with, Luаn Nian оften keрt to himsеlf. Не didn’t mind—being аlоnе suitеd him just fine. He didn’t likе playing with those оther kids anywаy. Hе found thеir сonstаnt crying and tantrums utterly bizarre.

His favorite pastime was holing up in his grandfather’s room.

His grandfather could paint, having studied under masters in his youth. Seeing Luan Nian’s interest, he taught him too. Luan Nian could sit still from a young age, often for hours on end. Everyone thought it strange—how could someone so combative also be so patient?

Luan Nian lacked empathy from the start. He couldn’t understand why people had such intense emotions. Sometimes walking through town, he’d see someone weeping bitterly by the roadside over something, with others sitting beside them wiping tears too. He’d frown, finding it all very odd.

Someone like him seemed never to have had a real childhood.

After meeting Shang Zhi Tao, he began to "pay attention." He rarely paid much mind to anyone before, perhaps because he disliked the way she appeared. In her interview call, she showed almost no standout qualities, yet Tracy gave her the green light. Luan Nian wondered why the usually fair Tracy would make an exception for someone so ordinary. So he attributed his attention to Shang Zhi Tao to the manner of her arrival.

For the first time in his life, he took special notice of someone.

He pressured her, driven by a mindset even he couldn’t explain, wanting to see when this girl would give up. But she was too resilient—nervous, anxious, yet admirably tenacious. Just refusing to admit defeat easily.

How could someone like this exist?

Clumsy, yet endearing; timid, yet sometimes bristling with defiance; ordinary, yet occasionally radiant with a beauty she herself was unaware of.

In a Guangzhou tea restaurant, he saw her snow-white, translucent skin and that slightly flushed face, and a man’s primal instincts were suddenly awakened.

Slowly, he discovered that "getting along with people could be comfortable." He had only a handful of close friends, keeping everyone else at a distance. Even in relationships, he disliked too much interference. He hated being tied down. He was picky and finicky in his interactions—others didn’t like him, and he didn’t like them either, making it hard to find a comfortable dynamic. Shang Zhi Tao had no sharp edges; she just bloomed quietly, neither demanding from others nor obsessing over trivialities.

Luan Nian found this comfortable way of relating novel.

Later on, Luan Nian gradually began to understand heartache. Life was a mess, but she always smiled. As if everything to her was just a game to be cleared—losing one round meant starting over, and she could afford to lose. When she was bullied by shady agents, harassed by others, or exploited by colleagues, Luan Nian thought: How dare you people target someone like her? Are you even human?

What kind of person is someone like this? Probably someone like Shang Zhi Tao—always sunny and sincere.

Luan Nian knows he’s a bastard.He had been cold-blooded and violent since childhood, utterly ignorant of love. A scoundrel like him was truly a calamity for someone like Shang Zhi Tao. Luan Nian had never possessed a conscience, yet he felt a sense of guilt toward Shang Zhi Tao.

For those he didn’t care about, what kind of person he was or how terrible his temperament might be didn’t matter. With little or no interaction, he couldn’t harm others. But Shang Zhi Tao was different. They had spent so much time together, and she had suffered for it.

Luan Nian came to understand this slowly. He was grateful that Shang Zhi Tao loved him; love had changed him.

Luan Nian once thought of the word “redemption.”

Those seemingly insignificant moments gradually accumulated, filling the hollow shell of a person, giving him flesh, blood, and emotions—like a form of redemption.

From the very beginning, she was special.

From the very beginning, he was terrible.

Later, watching Song Qiu Han and Lin Chun’er interact, Luan Nian gradually understood where the problems lay between him and Shang Zhi Tao.

Loving someone is never shameful; it should be open and honest. It should involve genuine appreciation, respect, and equal communication. And he had been utterly wrong.

Luan Nian was willing to learn and grateful that Shang Zhi Tao was willing to give him a chance. All dazzling, beautiful things eventually settle into the ordinary rhythms of life, but precious qualities will always shine. Shang Zhi Tao was that person who forever glowed. After half a lifetime, Luan Nian had finally found his own brand of old-fashioned romance and tenderness.

If given another chance, he would stand by her side at many important moments and say to her, “You are amazing. Keep going.”

Keep going, Shang Zhi Tao.

And also, don’t be ashamed of how we started anymore. I fell in love with you first.

===

Little Nian Tao fell ill for the first time in her life when she was 13 months old.

That day, Luan Nian was away on a business trip, and Shang Zhi Tao was meeting with a client. Dr. Liang called Shang Zhi Tao and said, “Don’t worry. I’ve given her a physical cooling-down, but it might come back. I just had to let you know.”

“I understand, Mom.”

Shang Zhi Tao returned from her client meeting and drove home. She saw Little Nian Tao with a fever-reducing patch on her forehead, lying on top of Luke. Perhaps Luke’s fur was soft and warm, as she hugged his neck and comforted him, mimicking the words adults usually said to her: “Good girl.” Her words were still unclear, and drool dripped from her mouth.

Luan Mingrui sat nearby, his expression dark, clearly upset.

“What’s wrong?” Shang Zhi Tao quietly asked Dr. Liang.

“Ignore him,” Dr. Liang said. “He wanted to take Nian Tao to the hospital, but I disagreed. I’m a doctor—what’s he making a fuss about?”

“Oh.”

Shang Zhi Tao washed her hands and picked up Little Nian Tao, who seemed quite happy. “Mama, mama.”

“Are you sick?”

Little Nian Tao patted her forehead and pointed at her grandmother. “Grandma.”

“Oh, Grandma took care of you. Mama knows. Do you want to thank Grandma for taking care of you?”

“Thank you.” Nian Tao clasped her little hands together and waved them toward her grandmother.

“And Grandpa too!” Shang Zhi Tao reminded her.

“Thank you.”

The child’s speech was still unclear, and her “thank you” sounded odd. Luan Mingrui smiled, then snorted lightly. He was still dissatisfied about not taking the child to the hospital for a checkup.

By midnight, Nian Tao’s fever indeed returned. Shang Zhi Tao followed Dr. Liang’s instructions to cool her down. In the midst of the commotion, she heard Luke barking. Luan Nian had returned.He carried the chill from outside, took off his coat downstairs, and crouched down to speak to Luke: "Why aren't you asleep yet? Don't stay up late at your age."

"Woof woof." Luke argued back, probably saying he wasn't staying up late.

Luan Nian smiled and pinched the dog's face hard: "Let's go check on our little sister. She's sick."

Upstairs, he first went to wash his face and hands, changed his clothes, completely shaking off the cold before walking to Little Nian Tao's bedside: "Fever again?"

"Yes."

"You go to sleep, I'll watch her."

"It's fine, tomorrow is the weekend."

Shang Zhi Tao checked Little Nian Tao's forehead temperature; it had dropped a bit, and she felt slightly relieved.

"Didn't you say you were coming back tomorrow?" Shang Zhi Tao pulled Luan Nian to lie down, sprawling over him with her arms and legs.

"Finished early, so I came back sooner." Luan Nian held her feet to warm them: "Sleep."

"Okay."

Shang Zhi Tao said okay, but after lying with her eyes closed for a long time, she heard Luan Nian's arm move—probably checking Nian Tao's temperature again. She laughed: "We're really so hopeless!"

"You're hopeless, don't drag me into it."

"Then why aren't you sleeping? You're just worried about Nian Tao."

"I'm just not sleepy."

Luan Nian was stubborn, and Shang Zhi Tao was used to it. She simply sat up and looked at him.

"What?"

"Someone likes me."

"?" Luan Nian scoffed.

"I'm serious." Shang Zhi Tao also found it strange—she was married and had a child, yet she still attracted unwanted attention. At first, she just thought this client was overly enthusiastic, until during the day at his place, he suddenly took out a jewelry box and handed it to her. Shang Zhi Tao naturally refused, but Lumi said to her: "Tell your husband quickly! Let that donkey feel a little threatened!"

"Hmm. So?" Luan Nian asked her.

"So I'm in high demand." Shang Zhi Tao's expression was extremely serious. If Lumi knew Luan Nian still had that deadpan look, she would definitely say: "Your husband is undoubtedly expressionless."

"Congratulations on still having charm in middle age." Luan Nian also sat up and asked her: "Just this one?"

"...How many should there be?"

"Ten, like the number of admirers I have?" Luan Nian knew Shang Zhi Tao was showing off, and naturally, he couldn't back down now. He needed to let his wife know how popular he was and put her in her place. So he took out his phone and tossed it to Shang Zhi Tao: "Here, look."

Shang Zhi Tao didn't usually look at Luan Nian's phone, but that night, she suddenly felt a little curious. So she took it and said to Luan Nian: "I'm looking, I'm really looking!"

Luan Nian raised an eyebrow: "Go ahead."

Shang Zhi Tao opened it. Luan Nian's phone was really uninteresting, but he had pinned her chat to the top, followed by the "We All Love Nian Tao" group and the "Tao Tao Family" group. The first group included Da Zhai, Old Shang, Dr. Liang, Luan's Father, and the two of them, filled with records of Nian Tao's growth. The second group was for Luan Nian, Da Zhai, Old Shang, and Shang Zhi Tao. Further down were pinned work groups. Shang Zhi Tao continued scrolling and finally saw something different. The girl's profile picture was really pretty. She clicked on it and saw the girl adding Luan Nian as a friend, then saying to him: "Luke, I'm really happy to have met you. If you have the chance to come to Shanghai next time, I'd like to treat you to a meal alone. Maybe we could also take a walk along the Bund at night?"

Luan Nian replied: "No need, I'm married."Shang Zhitao pursed her lips. She scrolled down further and saw five or six more girls. She tossed the phone to Luan Nian and snorted. Luan Nian pressed his advantage, adding, "These are the ones I haven't blocked yet. Want to see the blacklist?"

"You just have to win, don't you?"

"It's not good to lose in matters like this."

Luan Nian was completely open about it. He never told Shang Zhitao about the temptations he encountered because there was no need. He handled all temptations cleanly and decisively, giving no one any opportunity. When he was away on business trips, he was busy with work. After returning to the hotel, he would exercise or read. Once work was done, he would head home immediately, even if it was late at night, unwilling to wait until the next day. When he wasn't traveling, he would come home early after work because he was eager to see Niantao sooner. He didn't expect Shang Zhitao to come home early—her branch office had just started, and it was already rare for her to be home on weekends.

Seeing that Shang Zhitao's pursed lips hadn't relaxed, he teased her, "What? Not satisfied after losing?"

"It's not fair. I only have one."

"You're a bit of an idiot. Why compare numbers in something like this?" Luan Nian scoffed, completely forgetting that he was the one who started the comparison. "It's not worth bragging about at all. Any confession that can't be turned into a story is just a fleeting episode that can be deleted anytime. If you want to compete with me over this kind of thing..." Luan Nian paused. "I'll make you regret it."

They were bound to encounter countless temptations in their lives. Being married could shield them from some, but there would always be those who were persistent, had ulterior motives, sought excitement, or were just playing games. They couldn't tie each other down, taming and controlling one another until they lost themselves.

He tapped her forehead with his fingertip and pushed her down onto the pillow. "Go to sleep." Then he turned to check on Niantao, who had finally stopped running a fever and was sleeping quietly. He picked up her little water bottle and whispered, "Have some water, Little Niantao." Niantao drowsily took a few sips of warm water, then rolled over and went back to sleep.

Only then did Luan Nian lie back down. Seeing that Shang Zhitao was still awake, he pulled her into his arms. "What's wrong?"

"You encounter so many temptations. Will there ever be a day you can't resist?"

"There will be." Luan Nian pretended to be serious. Shang Zhitao pinched his arm hard. "Say that again!"

Luan Nian grunted in pain and habitually pinched her cheek. "Who taught you to pinch people?"

"Lumi."

Lumi had argued with Will and pinched his arm so hard it left a big purple bruise. She mentioned it to Shang Zhitao during the day, saying, "Don't tell anyone, but it really felt satisfying."

The two of them really talked about everything—whether it was raining, traffic jams, someone cheating, or even ants fighting, they could chat about it for a while.

"Learn something good. Be picky about who you make friends with. Lumi isn't the brightest. Don't let her lead you astray."

"Nonsense!" Shang Zhitao scolded him for talking nonsense, burrowed into his arms, closed her eyes, and fell asleep. She was exhausted too. During the day, when she heard Niantao was sick, she was frantic with worry. She rushed back in a hurry and, after persuading her in-laws to leave around ten o'clock, spent the rest of the time taking care of Niantao. It was only when her child fell sick this time that she truly understood what a mother fears most—her child falling ill. With Luan Nian back, her heart settled a little, and she could finally sleep.

Throughout the night, she noticed Luan Nian getting up many times. When she opened her eyes the next morning, she saw him holding Niantao, leaning against the headboard, fast asleep. Shang Zhitao tiptoed downstairs, took Luke for a walk, and then started making breakfast for them.Luan Nian still disliked having strangers around and remained averse to eating meals prepared by others. The housekeeper came daily only to clean and would leave afterward. Shang Zhi Tao never argued with Luan Nian over this; marriage was a practice in cultivation, and they needed to accommodate each other. She tolerated Luan Nian’s peculiar temperament, and he understood her hardships. Gradually, their days began to yield more substantial rewards.

Shang Zhi Tao’s cooking was still not great, so she only fried eggs and steak. The pepper salt sprinkled on the eggs had been prepared earlier by Luan Nian, and the steak sauce was also his previous creation. For breakfast, Nian Tao had tomato and egg noodles with minimal oil and salt, topped with seaweed flakes. The rest of the snacks were baked earlier by Shang Zhi Tao and Luan Nian together, stored in small containers with a little left. Luke’s meal consisted of previously air-dried chicken and dog food.

By the time she finished cooking, both Luan Nian and Nian Tao were awake. Luan Nian held the still wobbly Nian Tao’s hand as they descended in the elevator. Seeing Shang Zhi Tao, Nian Tao was overjoyed and let go of Luan Nian’s hand to run toward her: “Mommy, mommy!”

“Still feverish?” Shang Zhi Tao touched her forehead. The little one’s fever had subsided.

Luan Nian walked to the dining table, saw that Shang Zhi Tao had prepared breakfast, and cut a piece of steak to taste. Perfect—well-done, perhaps a bit too well-done.

“Is it good?” Shang Zhi Tao asked him.

He recalled his earlier conclusion that one essence of marriage was mutual appreciation, so he nodded slightly: “Delicious. You should eat more.” Then he checked Nian Tao’s breakfast—the noodles were passable.

The three humans and the dog each ate their meals. Little Nian Tao ate as if she were fighting, with half the noodles ending up in her bib and food smeared on her hands and face. Finding it amusing, she even tried to wipe the mess onto her hair and neck. Hearing Shang Zhi Tao scold her, she giggled, thinking her mother was playing with her!

Shang Zhi Tao was a bit annoyed: “Little Nian Tao, your habits are very bad. You’re wasting food and deliberately making yourself dirty.”

“Were you completely self-sufficient when you were just over a year old?” Luan Nian wasn’t pleased. He picked Nian Tao up from the dining table: “Besides, she’s still sick!” A lie—Little Nian Tao’s illness had come and gone quickly; she was already better.

Nian Tao understood and pouted at Luan Nian, as if saying: Mommy is so mean.

Shang Zhi Tao was exasperated by the two of them and glared at Luan Nian: “Don’t always spoil her. Rules should be established from a young age.”

“Your parents said you weren’t raised with strict rules, that you grew up freely.”

“Nonsense…”

“Should I tell your parents that you scolded Nian Tao for getting dirty while eating by herself?”

“…”

Luan Nian winked at Nian Tao: “Come on, Daddy will take you for a warm bath. As for you, it’s okay if you get dirty while eating, but you mustn’t get a fever again today.”

Shang Zhi Tao felt Luan Nian was overly indulgent with their child. Following them, she wanted to say something more, but Luan Nian suddenly stopped at the elevator entrance, turned around, and kissed her forehead: “Don’t be jealous.”

Implying that Shang Zhi Tao was scolding Nian Tao out of jealousy—how infuriating. Luan Nian looked somewhat smug, blocking the elevator door with his foot: “Not coming up?”

“Oh.”

The two undressed Nian Tao and placed her in the bathtub. Nian Tao was overjoyed, deliberately splashing water with her little palms. Hearing Shang Zhi Tao and Luan Nian’s exaggerated “ouch,” she laughed even harder. Shang Zhi Tao wiped the water droplets from her face and finally stopped looking like a stern mother. The two played with Little Nian Tao in the water, splashing it everywhere.

And soaking Shang Zhi Tao’s clothes.Luan Nian turned his head and saw the lace bra visible through her white T-shirt, his eyes darkening. Shang Zhi Tao wrapped Nian Tao in a towel, noticed Luan Nian’s expression, covered Nian Tao’s eyes with her hand, leaned over to kiss his lips, then quickly pulled away.

Nian Tao thought Shang Zhi Tao was playing peek-a-boo with her, so she pretended to cover her own eyes and then uncover them, even saying, “Naow.” She couldn’t say “cat” yet.

…

After Dr. Liang and Luan Mingrui arrived, he took Shang Zhi Tao to the supermarket. Just as the car reached the supermarket, he suddenly changed direction. Shang Zhi Tao was taken aback. “Where are we going?”

Luan Nian didn’t answer, driving to a resort hotel instead. He said to Shang Zhi Tao, “Get out.”

“Our home is just ten kilometers away,” Shang Zhi Tao reminded him.

“There are people at home.”

“Oh.”

Luan Nian had been on a business trip for a week, and last week coincided with Shang Zhi Tao’s period. He felt he couldn’t wait until evening. But by evening, he didn’t dare make a sound, feeling as though something was missing.

He was a bit impatient, his teeth grazing her chest. Hearing Shang Zhi Tao’s soft, delicate gasp, he felt instantly at ease. Both of them hadn’t felt so free in a long time, as if they had returned to the time before Shang Zhi Tao gave birth, or even better.

Life was always full of trivialities, but moments like this, wild and unrestrained, felt like a reward. They both loved it. Luan Nian whispered to her, “Do you want to go on a trip?”

“Just the two of us?”

“Yes.”

He felt they needed a brief escape, even if only for two or three days, to forget everything and just be together. That would be wonderful.

“What about Nian Tao?” Shang Zhi Tao raised a practical concern.

“Leave her behind.”

Luan Nian said it and did it. The following weekend, he took Shang Zhi Tao on a flight to the south, to the place where he was born. Shang Zhi Tao couldn’t help herself; even as the plane took off, she kept asking Luan Nian, “Will Nian Tao blame us? Will Luke miss us?”

“You only give yourself three days off a year, and you’re still worrying about everything?”

Though Luan Nian loved Nian Tao dearly, he also longed for time alone with Shang Zhi Tao. Both sets of grandparents doted on Nian Tao, so he was completely at ease. He simply felt they should have two or three days each year to be alone together, just like before—carefree, doing whatever they wanted or nothing at all.

The small town where Luan Nian was born was no longer what it used to be.

Over the years, he had occasionally returned once or twice during Qingming to sweep the graves and honor his ancestors. Each time, he felt the city had changed again, as if wearing new clothes. Only the ancient street by the river still held traces of the past. Luan Nian’s paternal grandmother lived at one end of the ancient street, and his maternal grandmother lived at the other.

Hand in hand, they strolled along the ancient street. Luan Nian told Shang Zhi Tao about his childhood. It seemed he didn’t have much of a childhood; what he talked about now was just fighting with that kid or climbing trees somewhere. Most of his childhood was spent alone. Because he didn’t fit in, Dr. Liang had secretly cried many times.

But he loved drawing. He could sit still for hours. His grandfather taught him to draw and praised him for his talent.

Yet what left the deepest impression on Luan Nian, aside from these memories, were the wisps of cooking smoke rising from the ancient street every evening and the aroma of food wafting from the cracks of people’s doors.Shang Zhi Tao listened to Luan Nian ramble about his past, feeling that his childhood was serene and mature, while hers was boisterous and innocent. But people, as time goes by, always undergo various changes. Just like life, it doesn’t always stay earth-shattering; gradually, it too returns to calm.

And what is most precious is that when everything settles into tranquility, we are still willing to occasionally take risks—to take risks with that person. This became Shang Zhi Tao’s favorite part.

That evening, they sat by the hotel window, watching the bustling crowd outside. Luan Nian magically produced a small cake with two candles on it. Shang Zhi Tao stared for a moment before remembering it was her birthday.

Time had flown by so quickly that the person who once counted down the days to her birthday had now forgotten it.

Luan Nian stood up. "Allow me to perform 'Happy Birthday' for Ms. Shang Zhi Tao." He swayed slightly, keeping the beat for himself as he sang a playful rendition of the birthday song. Shang Zhi Tao giggled at his antics, suddenly recalling the year he had sung on stage.

What exactly had time changed about them? They couldn't quite put it into words.

Now, as they gazed at each other, they both felt a sense of resolution.

"Make a wish," Luan Nian said to her. Shang Zhi Tao clasped her hands together, closed her eyes, and made a sincere wish. It was a small wish, yet deeply genuine—something she yearned for most in her heart after all these years.

"What did you wish for?" Luan Nian asked.

Shang Zhi Tao smiled faintly. "To have this day, year after year."

The year they met, they were worlds apart. She loved humbly, never daring to hope for a future. It was time that granted them hardships and the courage to face them; chaos and the conscience to seek clarity; separation and the bittersweet joy of reunion; rain and sunshine alike.

The present was truly wonderful.

May we have this day, year after year.

And may everyone find their own early spring sunshine.

(The End)