Speed and Love

Chapter 1

The train continued its journey along the tracks, the low houses outside the window gradually disappearing. At intervals, the carriage plunged into dark tunnels, carrying Jiang Mu toward an unknown future.

Jiang Mu had never traveled so far alone. She didn’t sleep a wink, her eyes fixed on the scenery outside, so different from the place she had always called home. The railway stretched across perilous mountains and valleys, shrouded in mist, creating an almost surreal, two-dimensional world that scattered her thoughts.

Her emotions were complex at this moment. The unfamiliar destination she was heading toward housed her most familiar relatives—people she hadn’t seen in years. She was no longer the willful little girl she once was, back when she still bore the surname Jin and was called Jin Mu.

On the day they parted, Suzhou was drenched in heavy rain. Her father carried an old black suitcase containing all the belongings he and her brother could take. At nine years old, she didn’t fully grasp what her parents’ divorce meant; she only knew that her father was taking her brother away to live somewhere far away.

She tried everything to hold her father back, begging him not to leave, pleading with her brother to stay, and imploring her mother not to drive them away. But all she got in return was her parents’ final, bitter argument. Terrified, she hid in a corner and cried uncontrollably. That day, Jin Chao quietly walked over, using his body to shield her from their quarreling parents, wiping her tears again and again with his sleeve, never saying a word.

Later, her mother forcibly locked her in her room to prevent her from causing a scene. Pressed against the iron bars of her second-floor window, she watched helplessly as her father, holding a faded plaid umbrella, led her brother away into the pouring rain.

From the second floor, she kept shouting her father’s and brother’s names. They turned to look at her. Through the curtain of rain, Jin Qiang’s eyes held a complicated mix of helpless emotions. He called out to her, “Be good, Mumu. We’ll call you as soon as we arrive.”

Jin Chao carried his backpack on his shoulders. Though he was just beginning to show the bearing of a young man, his figure was swallowed by the torrential rain, becoming indistinct. Her father hardened his heart, averted his gaze, and pulled Jin Chao away. The moment they turned, Jin Mu screamed “Dad!” and “Brother!” with all her might. In her young heart, she felt a strong conviction that once her father and brother left, they would never return.

She cried until she had no strength left. Through her blurred vision, she saw a figure rushing back. Blinking hard, she recognized Jin Chao dashing through the rain, climbing onto the first-floor awning, and scrambling up to her window.

That was… the last time she saw her brother. He was so close, drenched from head to toe, his long lashes drooping. Raindrops fell from his forehead onto his tall, straight nose. With one hand gripping the iron bars, he pulled a black Parker pen from his backpack and handed it to her, saying, “This is for you. Practice your handwriting well. Don’t be picky with food—eat your carrots too. Listen to Mom. Next time…”

Rainwater flooded his mouth and nose. He choked, coughing violently before continuing, “Next time we meet, I’ll check how your handwriting is coming along.”

As Jin Mu reached out through the window to take the pen, she clasped her small hand around her brother’s, tears streaming down her face as she asked, “Will you come back?”

Rain beat against their intertwined hands. Far in the sky, a flash of lightning briefly illuminated the night, lighting up Jin Chao’s dark, bright eyes—eyes that held all her hopes.

“Yes,” he told her.But he never returned, leaving only that cherished pen of his to accompany Jiang Mu for many years.

After that, Jiang Yinghan directly changed her surname, and from then on, no one ever called her Jin Mu again. Her name followed her mother's, becoming Jiang Mu.

In the first few years, she could still occasionally receive calls from her father and seize the opportunity to chat with her brother for a few words. Jin Chao would ask about her studies, inquire which level she had reached in her guzheng exams, and whether she had grown taller. With each phone call, Jin Chao's voice seemed to change—no longer the childish boy's voice from her memories, but growing deeper and deeper during his voice change period, making Jiang Mu feel unfamiliar.

However, Jiang Yinghan didn't seem to like her frequently talking with her brother on the phone. Every time their conversation exceeded ten minutes, Jiang Yinghan would urge her to go do her homework.

After fifth grade, she rarely received calls from her father anymore. She heard he had remarried, started a new family, and had a daughter. Jiang Yinghan told her not to disturb them anymore.

After that, Jin Qiang seldom called back. When Jiang Mu learned that her father had another daughter and her brother had a new little sister, she fell into a depressed mood for a long time, as if her family had been stolen by someone else. The overflowing love from her father and brother was now given to another little life, and that happiness would never belong to her again.

After developing these concerns, Jiang Mu could no longer recklessly call Jin Chao to complain when she failed exams or had conflicts with her desk mate. She was afraid that if she called, the person answering would be her father's new wife. In Jiang Mu's heart, her father and brother would always be family, yet she had to admit that they had gradually disappeared from her life ever since that stormy night.

After fifth grade summer vacation, Jiang Mu moved twice with Jiang Yinghan. She tried calling to tell her father and brother their new address, but each time a strange woman answered the phone. She didn't know how to address the woman and could only hang up quickly. Soon after, that phone number became disconnected.

She wrote several letters to Jin Chao, telling him their new home address and contact information, but she never received any reply or call. After sixth grade, she completely lost contact with them.

One year after divorcing Jin Qiang, Jiang Yinghan opened a lottery store. The monthly earnings were enough to support the mother and daughter, and their life kept getting better. However, whenever her father was mentioned, Jiang Yinghan's face would show displeasure. Over time, Jiang Mu stopped frequently bringing up her father and brother in conversation.

If life had continued following this routine, given Jiang Mu's academic performance, she might have gotten into a good university, found a stable job, and stayed by her mother's side—likely never having any intersection with her father and brother again. But during her senior year of high school, she unexpectedly learned something that would change the trajectory of her life from that point forward.