Gao Fei was amused by him. "Alright, don't try to stir up my guilt. You clearly have your girlfriend keeping you company."
Mentioning his girlfriend left Gao Xiang somewhat at a loss for words. He could only lean back against the head of the bed, resting his hands behind his head, and stare blankly ahead. Suddenly, Gao Fei sat up and looked at him seriously. "Dad, do you remember your first love?"
He was both surprised and a little embarrassed. "Why are you asking this all of a sudden?"
"Never mind that. Just answer my question first."
He had no choice but to say, "I remember."
"When did you meet her?"
"In college. She was a year below me."
Gao Fei tilted his head and studied him. "Wow, you didn't have your first love until college."
He didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "What's wrong with that?"
"You don't seem like the bookish, stay-at-home type. But you matured really late, only getting a girlfriend in college. Didn't you like any girls in middle school?"
"I attended Qinggang Middle School. The school had a strict atmosphere and heavy academic pressure..."
"What kind of excuse is that? Adolescence isn't something that school discipline or studies can suppress."
He looked at his son, who was speaking so confidently. "Are you trying to tell me you've entered an unstoppable adolescence and have a girlfriend now?"
Gao Fei deflated immediately, flopping back down. "I did, but we broke up today."
Gao Xiang was both annoyed and amused. "Well, that's good. Saves your homeroom teacher from calling me to school again to lecture me about your early romance."
"I've suffered such a blow, and you say that. Do you even have any sympathy?"
"I do sympathize with you."
Gao Fei shot him a skeptical sidelong glance. "Your tone is too flat. It doesn't sound like sympathy."
He had to admit with a laugh, "You don't seem too upset, so there's no need for me to overdo the sympathy. Besides, there's still a long time ahead, and too many uncertainties. Breaking up with your first love is pretty normal."
Gao Fei grew curious. "Your first love wasn't my mom, was it?"
Gao Xiang was momentarily speechless. When Gao Fei was little, he had of course asked about his mother. But no matter how much Gao Xiang objected, Chen Zi Hui had a ready-made story about his mother passing away from illness while giving birth to him, with details borrowed from her own mother, who had died from postpartum complications—a very convincing tale. As Gao Fei grew older, he couldn't help but notice that his father's room was filled with photos of him but not a single one of his mother. Chen Zi Hui had solemnly and secretly told him that his father had been so heartbroken over his wife's death that it took him a long time to recover, which was why she had put away all the photos and he should never bring it up in front of his dad. Gao Fei was moved to tears, deeply sympathetic toward his father, and indeed never mentioned it again.After hearing about this from his father Gao Ming, Gao Xiang was so angry he remained speechless for a long time. But when he protested to Chen Zi Hui, she retorted, "What else should I say? How do I explain to a child who just started kindergarten that you're not his biological father but his cousin, and I'm not his grandmother but his aunt? Since you let him take your surname, you have to give him a reasonable background. Otherwise, why did we bother moving away from Qinggang? Why did you give up the winery your grandfather worked so hard to build?" He had no response, and had to admit that Chen Zi Hui wasn't entirely unreasonable.
Now facing Gao Fei's question, he decided that even if he couldn't tell the truth, he absolutely wouldn't fabricate any lies, so he shook his head.
Fortunately, Gao Fei's focus wasn't on his mother: "How long do you think one person remembers another?"
"That's hard to say. It depends on how deep the feelings are."
"Then your feelings for your first love couldn't have been very deep, otherwise you wouldn't have married my mom right after college and had me."
He fell silent again. Seeing his expression, Gao Fei suddenly remembered the family taboo and secretly blamed himself, quickly changing the subject. "Actually, I'm not particularly sad, just a bit frustrated."
"Alright, tell me about it. How long were you together, and why did you break up?"
"About three months." Hearing this duration, he almost laughed. Gao Fei glanced at him sideways, "Today she told me her mom wants her to focus on her studies. I think that's just an excuse—her grades haven't been affected at all; she's still the top student in our class."
"Your grades, on the other hand, have been quite affected. Your homeroom teacher..."
Mentioning grades, Gao Fei could only grin cheekily, "Yes, yes, our homeroom teacher told you to discipline me properly. But you're the most open-minded dad, always opposed to exam-oriented education, focused on cultivating my overall qualities, don't want me to be a bookworm who only studies, and won't put too much pressure on me."
He sighed helplessly, "Don't use that to shut me up. You should remember what else I've said—a person needs to have certain goals and the ability to focus on what must be done."
He became serious, and Gao Fei didn't talk back. "I remember everything you've said. It's just that sometimes I can't control myself very well. Besides, there are too many fun things in the world, and studying is too boring. I'm not saying I won't study, I just don't want to spend all my time on it."
"There are plenty of interesting things in this world. What's the point of studying so seriously?"
This was exactly what Chen Zi Yu often used to tease Gao Xiang with.
Thinking of Chen Zi Yu now, Gao Xiang felt somewhat somber. He turned to look at Gao Fei, who had a clever face with a straight nose and eyes that always held a hint of laughter—just like before. These inherited traits made him feel emotional.
"Are you somewhat disappointed in me?"
Gao Xiang shook his head, "No, you're my son. I have expectations for you, but I want you to be happy even more."
Gao Fei grinned, "Then I'm relieved."
"I'll be away for a few days starting tomorrow. Listen to Grandma at home and don't make her angry."
"Where are you going?"
"Tibet."
"What?" Chen Zi Hui happened to be bringing them a late-night snack and overheard, immediately becoming anxious. "Why are you going to Tibet again?""I have some matters to attend to."
Chen Zi Hui was about to say more, but meeting his gaze, she abruptly stopped. After they finished their late-night snack and Gao Fei began doing his homework, they went downstairs, where she forcibly pulled Gao Xiang into the kitchen.
"Do you want me to wash the dishes?"
She glared at him, "Tell me honestly—when you said Zuo Si'an left, did she go to Tibet?"
He didn't want to lie to his mother, "Yes, her father is still working there, so she went to see him."
"And why did you run over there again? Even if not for my sake, you should think of Xiao Fei..."
"I'll go and come back quickly; it won't affect Xiao Fei."
"What will you say to Xiao Yan?"
"I broke up with her."
Chen Zi Hui was stunned. After a long pause, she spoke, her voice trembling with anger, "How could you do this? Do you really plan to never marry?"
"I don't want to marry just for the sake of marriage; it wouldn't be fair to Xiao Yan either. Please don't bother arranging any more blind dates for me in the future."
"You're telling me to step aside and stop interfering in your life, aren't you?"
He smiled, "Don't overthink it. I can handle my own affairs. Now that Ngari has air service, the trip won't take much time. I should be able to make it back for your birthday. What gift would you like this year?"
"Stop beating around the bush with me. I'm your mother—just tell me directly: why must you go to Ngari?"
"I'm worried about her."
Chen Zi Hui was furious, "Worried, worried—you've always said that. What is there to worry about? Even if you owed her something—which you don't—you nearly lost your life last time escorting her there. That should have settled any debt. And that year in the U.S. too..."
He frowned and cut her off, "Don't drag up irrelevant things."
"She's an adult now, settled abroad, and probably married already. What exactly are you worried about? Has she been bothering you again?"
"Don't worry, I'll be fine. Last time in Ngari, I just caught a cold carelessly. This time, I'll be more careful."
Chen Zi Hui knew well that Gao Xiang was filial but not obedient; she had never truly been able to change his decisions. Despite her anger, she could only say resentfully, "The moment you mentioned her return, I knew nothing good would come of it. What can I do even if I'm worried? It's a cursed fate—I always knew this was a cursed fate."
Gao Xiang returned to his room and began packing. He often traveled for work or leisure, having visited nearly half the world, but none of those trips left as deep an impression as his last one to Ngari, Tibet—and that time, too, was for Zuo Si'an.
☆ 23
Chapter 6: 1997, Hanjiang
The doctors at Qinggang Hospital had been correct in their assessment. After several consultations in the provincial capital, the newborn was diagnosed with Tetralogy of Fallot combined with atrial septal defect and hypoplastic left heart syndrome—an extremely complex form of congenital heart disease requiring surgical intervention.
Chen Zi Hui refused to give up. After pulling strings, she arranged for two renowned domestic experts to conduct another consultation, but the conclusion remained unchanged. The experts informed her that this condition varied significantly among individuals: it could present as pulmonary atresia or near-atresia with extensive collateral vessels, or merely as a ventricular septal defect with mild outflow tract or pulmonary valve stenosis. Consequently, surgical outcomes also differed greatly.One of the experts spoke with stark frankness, plainly telling them that most children with Tetralogy of Fallot are born with adequate systemic circulation oxygen saturation, and cyanosis gradually appears as hypoxic symptoms progressively develop. However, this child exhibited severe symptoms immediately after birth. Surgery would be extremely painful for the child, with numerous postoperative complications and higher mortality and disability rates compared to other cardiac surgeries. The family must be psychologically prepared for this.
Chen Zi Hui’s vision instantly darkened, and she needed Gao Xiang’s support to remain standing. Yet her resolve was unwavering—she would cling to even the faintest glimmer of hope and never give up.
Regarding treatment, the experts offered differing opinions. One recommended performing the surgery as early as possible to reduce secondary hypertrophy of the right ventricle and minimize myocardial damage. Another expert argued that although radical surgery for Tetralogy of Fallot has become increasingly common in recent years, it requires the pulmonary artery and left ventricle to have developed to at least 60% of normal function. Given that the newborn was premature, extremely frail aside from the complex cardiac issues, and failed to meet any of the required indicators, the child would not withstand a one-stage radical procedure. Instead, it would be better to perform the surgery in two stages: first, a shunt procedure after the child reaches three months of age to create a connection between the systemic and pulmonary circulation, increasing pulmonary blood flow and oxygenated blood to alleviate hypoxia. Once the child grows older and the cardiopulmonary function and pulmonary artery have developed further, a subsequent radical surgery could be performed.
Gao Xiang consulted multiple sources and learned that domestic surgical treatment for congenital heart disease was still in its early stages. Both opinions had their merits and drawbacks. Chen Zi Hui leaned toward the latter expert’s view, believing that the child was too weak and that it would be safer to wait until the child was older and slightly stronger before proceeding with surgery.
To ensure the child received timely medical care, Chen Zi Hui moved into Gao Xiang’s apartment in the provincial capital. The two-bedroom apartment, once his solitary haven, was now crammed with his mother, the child, a live-in nanny, a daytime nurse, a part-time housekeeper, and an array of baby supplies. The sickly child slept restlessly, startled easily, and frequently suffered from colds and fevers, sometimes even experiencing seizures without warning, prompting frantic trips to the hospital at all hours.
Chen Zi Hui and the nanny cared for the child together, but within less than a month, the nanny protested, complaining that the child was difficult to manage and that Chen Zi Hui was overly demanding and strict. Even when Gao Xiang offered a raise, the nanny refused and walked out.
OpenNovel