Тhе rоom was in сhаоs. Тhе young womеn, hаving never еxpеriеnсеd suсh а scenе before, were both shосked аnd terrifiеd, thеir сriеs filled with sоrrоw.
Оnсе as рure and noblе аs a mаgnolia on а branch, сlever аnd ассоmрlishеd in everу wаy, whо соuld havе imaginеd shе would be trаmрled tо such a statе? If her husband’s cаlсulаted sсhemes werе thе dеeреst wоunds, thеn bеing misundеrstoоd bу the brоther shе had wholеheаrtеdlу supроrtеd аnd abandonеd by all of Great Yе—what could рossibly sustаin her will tо livе?
Yu Xiхia’s urgent command thundered through the air: “Fetch the Imperial Physician! Quickly!”
No longer caring about distinctions between outer and inner court officials, Jinshi stepped forward to assess her condition. He felt for the pulse at her neck, pulled back the blanket, and pressed on the acupoints at her middle abdomen, inner wrist, back, and inner arm. As a martial artist, he knew nothing of medical theory or pharmacology, but he understood these were effective methods to stop bleeding. Struggling to control his trembling hands, he then pinched the webbing between her thumb and forefinger and pressed her philtrum, murmuring, “You must not come to harm, you must not…”
Someone accustomed to life and death suddenly realized how terrifying death could be. If it were happening to him, he would grit his teeth, brace himself, and face whatever came, be it heaven or earth. But this was the delicate princess—a mere splinter in her hand was akin to an assault, let alone suddenly coughing up mouthfuls of blood. To watch someone you cannot forget bloom, endure hardships, and then wither and turn to dust—what a profoundly hopeless agony. He had crossed mountains and rivers to return to her side, hoping she would live well, not to escort her on her final journey.
Perhaps due to the timely rescue, she finally showed a response, though only a faint moan of pain. As for where it hurt, there was no further elaboration.
The Imperial Physician arrived at last, but he was blocked outside the crowd of people. The medical officials held a consultation to prescribe remedies, deliberating inside while a stove was already set up outside. The Imperial Physician explained that Her Highness’s condition resulted from excessive emotional distress affecting her heart and lungs, leading to convulsions, unconsciousness, and reversed qi and blood flow. For a full recovery, she would have to abstain from all seven emotions and six desires from now on. In other words, her illness was difficult to cure unless she renounced the world and entered monastic life.
Anxious yet unable to approach her again, he could only entrust Tong Huan: “You must guard Her Highness for me.”
Tong Huan nodded, keeping close watch without stepping away. Seeing the delicate brows tightly furrowed, she knew Her Highness must be in great discomfort, even if unable to express it.
Xiao You wept uncontrollably nearby, but it was Tong Huan who first regained composure, whispering sternly, “Her Highness is not in grave danger. Stop crying. Go prepare clean clothes, bedding, and pillows, and bring a hot towel. There is so much to do—no time for your tears!”
Scolded into awareness, Xiao You hurried off with a group of servant girls to make preparations. Tong Huan rolled up her sleeves to wipe the corners of Her Highness’s mouth. Over time, the blood had begun to congeal, and as she wiped, she too could not hold back her sobs. Where was the bright, fiery spirit of their first meeting? In just six short years, how had it come to this?
Is a person’s fate truly predestined by a previous life? Today, all may be splendid; tomorrow, it could take a sudden turn for the worse—such fluctuations are utterly heart-stopping. Now, with nothing left to live for, they must find a way to reignite her will to carry on.She leaned down and whispered in her ear, "Your Highness, let's recover our health, leave Great Ye, and take the little prince to find Seal-holding Xiao, alright? He isn't dead—I heard he's making a living selling wine in a vassal state down south. Let's go there and open a silk shop next to his house. Business is sure to be good... You must get better. If others won't give you a way out, you must live on. Let them fight until they're battered and bruised—we'll turn a blind eye and have nothing more to do with them."
She indeed found some motivation, struggling to open her eyes to look at her, and asked haltingly, "He... really... is still alive?"
Tong Huan nodded through tears, "Yes, he and The Empress are both alive. This servant will take you to find them. Don't you like Yin Lou and Xiao Duo the most? From now on, you can be with your dearest friends—they will never harm you."
She closed her eyes again, tears slipping down the corners. They had fled far away, afraid of leaking the news, and had even kept it from her. But she didn't blame them—as long as they were alive, that was enough. Perhaps she really could go find them. After all, she had already worried enough for Great Ye; it was time to lay down the burden.
With the will to survive, her heart gradually calmed. After taking medicine and sleeping for two days, the pain in her chest lessened. As long as she didn't think about the war, she no longer felt discomfort. Recalling the experience afterward, she even smiled, "It was just a sudden wave of nausea. I thought it was morning sickness and tried to get up, but I couldn't muster the strength. Vomiting blood is different from vomiting food—when I had morning sickness, my throat hurt terribly, but vomiting blood felt ordinary, even a bit sweet... It wouldn't have mattered if I died then. I saw Father and Mother—they came to fetch me with lanterns. Later, it was the Thousand Household Commander who dragged me back hard; otherwise, I might have followed them."
Her description was so eerie that Xiao You crouched by her legs and said, "You're so young—how could you follow them? No matter how dear they were, once dead, they become heartless. They should have driven you back—how could they come to fetch you with lanterns!"
Yet she smiled, "They did it for my own good. How much I suffer alive—though you all worry for me, none of you can take my place..." Gradually pausing, she shifted her gaze to Jinshi, "Thousand Household Commander, I have a favor to ask of you."
Since that day, the lines on Jinshi's face could no longer remain stern. He bent down, adopting a compliant and accommodating posture, and replied, "Your Highness commands, and your subject obeys without question."
She raised her hand, pointing first to the nearby Tong Huan and Xiao You, then to the distant Yu Xixia, "If I die someday, they... and the two Nurse Matrons—I entrust them all to you. Take them away for me, beyond the Southern Garden's borders. Where they go from there is up to them."
Tong Huan and Xiao You were stunned, but Jinshi said, "Alright. Your Highness, rest assured—your subject will certainly live up to your trust. But as long as Your Highness lives for one day, your subject will guard you for one day. How long has it been since your subject and Your Highness first met?"
Wanwan lowered her head and began counting on her fingers, "I returned to the Eldest Princess Residence in Beijing when I was seventeen... one year, two years... the day after tomorrow will make exactly five years."
Jinshi seemed deeply wistful, "Five years... your subject has done nothing for Your Highness and feels ashamed."
She said no, "Thousand Household Commander, you are loyal and brave. To me, you and the Eunuch Official are both people worthy of trust."Her words brought him immense comfort. "How could I, a mere subject, dare to compare myself with the Factory Duke? But my heart is the same as his—as long as Your Highness walks a smooth path, even if I must crawl at your feet, I will ensure you proceed unhindered."
A faint smile touched her lips. "I know the heart of the Thousand Household Commander—a rare and unwavering loyalty."
In truth, she did not fully understand, or perhaps only saw the surface. But it did not matter. As long as he could silently watch over her without adding to her burdens, he was content.
They began planning their escape. Yu Xixia mentioned that he had privately stored some gunpowder—a piece of good news. In a situation where their numbers were completely mismatched, that gunpowder could either destroy everything or bring hope. If they truly found themselves cornered, sacrificing a few to eliminate most of the Goshiha would be a worthwhile trade.
The Silk-clad Guards had thoroughly scouted the defenses around the Princess's Residence, compiling the details into a map with precise assignments for each direction. As preparations neared completion, Tong Huan entered to inform her, "Steward Yu and Lord Jin have been secretly discussing for a long time and have finalized the escape route. The Mid-Autumn Festival is in two days. Those Qi people value festivals, so their vigilance will surely slacken during the celebrations. We’ll seize that moment to break out."
She looked up blankly. "Is there a real chance of success? I still hope they won’t take such risks. I don’t want everyone injured or exhausted for my sake alone. Besides, where could I even go…"
Tong Huan replied, "To find Seal-holding Xiao, of course. Didn’t you agree to that last time? Have you forgotten?"
She murmured an acknowledgment. Her memory had grown unreliable lately—what she said today, she might forget tomorrow, and she herself didn’t understand why.
She rubbed her eyes again. "Lately, I haven’t been straining as much to see people, and I can read the words in books clearly now."
Tong Huan said that was good, speaking to her as if soothing a child. Sometimes her words would trail off incoherently.
Her behavior had also become unusual. She often sat in the shadows beneath the corridor, squinting slightly, gazing quietly and melancholically toward the horizon. The sky was empty, yet she stared as if entranced. Then there was the child. By all accounts, at five months, her pregnancy should be showing, but this time there was no sign of movement at all. When the Imperial Physician took her pulse, he confirmed the child was still there but hesitated and spoke vaguely, suggesting that her foundation had been damaged. There were two possibilities: one, the child was small and growing slowly; the other, more pessimistic, was that after such a calamity, Her Highness’s vitality had been drained. If her abdomen still showed no swelling after another half-month, the situation would likely turn dire. They would have to administer medicine to expel the child, as a retained stillbirth would harm Her Highness’s health.
Tong Huan, deeply worried, dared not relay the Imperial Physician’s words to her and instead consulted Yu Xixia. They had initially considered postponing the plan, but the opportunity was too rare. After a long moment of contemplation, Yu Xixia made the decision: "We’ll bring an Imperial Physician along on the journey to attend to Her Highness closely and protect the pregnancy."
The fifteenth day of the eighth month arrived in the blink of an eye. Everything was prepared. Fearing hidden sentries monitoring from high vantage points, everyone remained scattered in their positions, quietly waiting for nightfall. Beneath their outer armor, the Silk-clad Guards carried slender bamboo tubes filled with gunpowder—each person carried over ten of them. In a moment of absolute desperation, they would ignite them, vowing to protect the Princess Royal’s escape even at the cost of their lives.Yet things always happen so coincidentally. At lantern lighting time, a series of hurried footsteps approached, and a young eunuch rushed in breathlessly, speaking in a hoarse voice, "My lords, Her Highness has started bleeding. I'm afraid she won't be able to leave today."
The child was indeed lost again. At that time, Wanwan was fully dressed, waiting only for word from outside. Who would have thought that as she sat there, a dull pain began to weigh in her lower abdomen. After waiting another half hour, it felt like a dam had burst—the cushion beneath her was soaked. She didn't understand what was happening and instinctively wiped with her hand. Holding it up to the lamplight, she saw her palm stained crimson. A heavy scent of blood spread through the air. She murmured, "It's over... I couldn't keep it after all," and delivered a stillborn fetus.
The child was pitiful, even smaller than the last one, so Wanwan didn't suffer as much physical pain this time. Yet her heart was shattered, beyond repair. As they wrapped the silk around and carried it away, she turned her head to the other side, her mind filled with chaotic thoughts. Among all the offices of the Great Ye imperial court, not a single one was truly useful—only the Directorate of Astronomy lived up to the black gauze caps they wore. How accurate their predictions were... "Shallow bonds with kin"... She slowly lowered her eyelids, twisting her lips into a faint, bitter smile. Perhaps it was for the best—clean and unburdened, a sense of lightness. Last time, the pain had been unbearable, but this time she actually felt a sense of relief. After all, her own life held no hope. Why bring a child into the world only to let them follow in her footsteps, enduring a lifetime of endless suffering?
They couldn't leave on the fifteenth day of the eighth month, but as the saying goes, a loss may turn out to be a gain. Those palace guards truly lived up to being the Prince of Nanyuan's personal army. Although they also celebrated the festival, their numbers increased, rotating in two shifts and patrolling tirelessly around the buildings, leaving no opportunity for escape.
Wanwan summoned Jinshi and Yu Xixia, thanking them for their loyalty, and finally said, "I've thought a lot. If the fall of Great Ye is fate, then we can only accept it. The Prince of Nanyuan will surely come to see me eventually. When that time comes, you should disperse and stop risking your lives for anyone. Live well. I can no longer face the spirits of those three hundred Imperial Guards. If I were to lose you as well, I truly wouldn't be able to go on living."
She no longer agreed to leave, and it seemed she had lost the will to resist. Since she had come to terms with it, they would follow her lead. "We have only one thing to say, Your Highness: if you fight, we fight; if you seek peace, we seek peace."
She smiled faintly, a hint of weariness in her expression. "It should be, 'If Your Highness surrenders, we surrender.'" Turning to Yu Xixia, she asked, "How far has the Prince of Nanyuan advanced?"
Yu Xixia hesitated for a moment before replying, "He has already passed Liangxiang and is advancing toward Fangshan."
Her smile carried a tinge of bitterness, like the cold and gloomy weather outside. "So fast... breaking through every obstacle, truly impressive!"
Whether it was praise or criticism, no one could decipher the hidden meaning in her words. After a long while, she finally let out a sigh, flipping through the calendar as she said, "The New Year is approaching. Fortunately, although the Princess's Residence is confined, we are not deprived of food. Let's prepare well and have a peaceful New Year together. The more turmoil there is outside, the more peaceful we should be here... Let's not waste this blessing from heaven."
With over a month left until the New Year, she began cutting window decorations—maggies perched on branches, endless vines of melons and gourds... all intricate and auspicious patterns. The residence had over thirty windows, and she cut one design each day, ensuring they would all be used by the year's end.
In winter, the Eldest Princess Residence appeared gray and dull, even the painted decorations under the eaves seemed faded. Yet with the window decorations pasted up, it seemed to regain a sense of vitality. Like pale lips touched with vermilion, the contrast was striking and quite beautiful.Her eyes could only bear dim light; by the time spring arrived, she already loathed the spring sunlight, so curtains were hung early beneath the eaves for shade. After an uneventful New Year, the cold lingered unusually long. Wrapped in a quilt, she sat on the kang, occasionally taking out a map to study, guessing when news of the city’s fall would arrive—from Fangshan to the Nine Gates, was it not just a step away?
Blows came one after another, yet she had never grown accustomed. She had been waiting, as if lacking only a catalyst for everything to come to an end. Reflecting on her life, she had lost her parents young, then her eldest brother died, Xiao Duo left, she married a man with wolfish ambitions, and in the end, she likely would not meet a good fate. Clearly destined for unparalleled nobility, why had her life turned as bitter as coptis root? Perhaps it was her own nature—if she had been softer, more accepting of circumstances, she might have been much happier than she was now.
During the season when willow catkins filled the sky, looking out through the lattice window gave the strange sensation of heavy snow falling under bright sunshine. Having been cooped up indoors for too long, she occasionally ventured outside. Not far, just standing in the courtyard, her light-sensitive eyes tearing up in the wind, yet a smile lingered on her face. Without even reaching out, simply holding her palm flat, willow catkins would drift down and settle between her fingers.
So light, so small, always at the mercy of the wind. She was just like them—though she harbored ambitions to change the world, she lacked the fate to do so.
She pursed her lips and blew a breath, sending it away. Vaguely, she recalled that early summer when she was fourteen, running along the Broken Rainbow Bridge amid rows of willow trees. How joyful she had been then, a carefree youth who believed life would always be so splendid. Looking back now, she realized that the fortune each person’s life could bear was limited; if one enjoyed too much, it had to be repaid in other ways.
After a moment of melancholy, she took a deep breath and prepared to return indoors. Turning, she caught sight of Tong Huan standing at the gate with a messenger, seemingly hesitant about whether to let him in.
She paused and asked what was wrong. Tong Huan replied, “A letter has arrived from the capital.”
Her heart remained unusually calm. A letter from the capital—aside from The Emperor, who else would remember her?
“Let him in.”
Tong Huan brought the man before her. She glanced at him and recognized the face—it was Pingchuan, who served in the imperial presence. He held out the letter flatly, not bowing respectfully as he usually would. It seemed even eunuchs looked down on her now.
She smiled, her tone still gentle. “Pingchuan, it’s been a long time.”
Only then did he give a slight bow. “Your Highness, I hope you are well. I have been sent by The Emperor to deliver a family letter. Please read it.”
She took the letter in her hand. The handwriting was familiar, and regardless of the content, a warm feeling spread in her heart.
Tong Huan said, “The Goshiha have already inspected it. Presumably, it’s safe, which is why it was allowed into the residence.”
In the past, who would dare openly inspect a letter from The Emperor? Clearly, times had changed. She asked Pingchuan about The Emperor’s recent situation. Pingchuan replied stiffly, “The Old Grandfather’s circumstances are written in the letter. Your Highness may read it yourself.”
Yu Xixia glared angrily and rebuked him sharply. Wanwan said, “Do not be angry. Take him to rest and have some food. All of you may leave now. Let me be alone.”After sending them away, she sat down at the desk and pulled out a sheet of Huahua paper from the already opened envelope—this Second Brother of hers was always so poetic. Huahua paper, also known as Xue Tao paper, was created by the courtesan Xue Tao. So even if jade shatters, it must shatter with grace. She hadn’t learned much else from him, but this composure of remaining unflustered even if Mount Tai were to collapse before one’s eyes was truly worth savoring.
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