They never had a proper confession of feelings, nor a decent breakup.
It began and ended in haste.
So let's start all over again, from the very beginning.
You don't have to move on from the past.
Just follow me—I'll create new memories for us, a fresh start.
After all, we're still young. It's not too late to begin again, not too late to get to know each other all over.
……
Zhou Wan never expected Lu Xixiao to say such things.
That proud, unyielding Lu Xixiao.
So much so that even as she followed him through the gates of the Lu family home, her mind remained in a daze.
But this daze, to some extent, helped numb Zhou Wan's fear.
Lu Xixiao had clearly contacted Old Mr. Lu in advance, as the elderly man was already waiting in the living room.
Lu Xixiao had only mentioned coming back to see him, but Old Mr. Lu knew he never visited without a reason. When he saw Zhou Wan, he showed no surprise.
He was just as before—kind yet exuding an undeniable authority—and smiled at Zhou Wan. "Have a seat."
Lu Xixiao took her hand and sat with her on the sofa.
A servant brought two cups of tea and quickly left, leaving the spacious living room to the three of them.
"Long time no see, young lady," Old Mr. Lu said. "Oh, right, you must have graduated by now. I shouldn't call you 'young lady' anymore."
Zhou Wan lowered her eyes. "Yes, I've graduated. You can just call me Zhou Wan."
"Did you come with A Xiao today to see me?"
The question was subtly probing. Zhou Wan pressed her lips together, unsure how to respond.
Beside her, Lu Xixiao chuckled. "I dragged her here."
Zhou Wan: "..."
Old Mr. Lu could guess the situation just by observing Zhou Wan's demeanor. He leisurely took a sip of tea, then set the cup down on the coffee table with a crisp clink.
The sound was soft, but Zhou Wan's fingers still trembled slightly.
"A Xiao, I've told you before," Old Mr. Lu said, cutting to the chase. "She isn't the right person for you."
Lu Xixiao deflected with a laugh. "Then who do you think is right for me?"
Knowing his grandson wouldn't listen, Old Mr. Lu avoided the question directly. "A Xiao, don't forget you spent a month in the hospital because of her."
"Luo He's target has always been me. She was just caught in the crossfire. At worst, it was because of Lu Zhongyue's illegitimate son. No matter how you look at it, she isn't to blame."
Lu Xixiao countered every point Old Mr. Lu made.
"And what about her involvement with Guo Xiangling? She single-handedly manipulated the Lu family into chaos, and you still want to be with her? Do you plan to marry her someday?"
Old Mr. Lu continued, "Do you know what people will say if they find out? The Lu family can't afford such a disgrace."
Lu Xixiao curled his lips indifferently. "Then just kick me out of the Lu family."
"You insolent brat!"
Old Mr. Lu slammed his teacup onto the table, splashing scalding tea.
This was the first time Zhou Wan had seen Old Mr. Lu lose his temper.
The anger of such a revered elder, held in high esteem by many, carried a natural authority.
Lu Xixiao's expression remained unchanged.
The living room fell into a prolonged silence.
Zhou Wan twisted her fingers tighter and tighter.
Finally, Lu Xixiao spoke again, his voice softening. "Grandpa."
Old Mr. Lu paused.He couldn't remember how long it had been since he last heard Lu Xixiao call him "Grandpa." In his memory, only when Lu Xixiao was very young did he address him that way; later, he followed others in calling him "Old Mr. Lu."
Lu Xixiao looked at him, his gaze calm, fearless, and resolute: "You should know that I'm different from Lu Zhongyue. I don't need someone like my mother to accompany and guide me onto the right path. Everything I've achieved over the years proves that."
"I've grown up and can decide my own life. I don't want anyone else to experience a tragedy like my mother's. I've never cared about others' opinions or judgments. You don't need to use those to scare her or pressure her into thinking about me. I know what I want and what I'm capable of achieving."
Lu Xixiao had never spoken these words to anyone before.
If he had been muddled and confused in the past, now he was walking on a broad and bright road.
Though thorns and traps still lay on this road, and at times it was shrouded in thick fog, he was certain it was the path he wanted to take.
"This is a matter between her and me. In the past, I was immature and my words carried no weight—there was nothing I could do. But now, I'm the one in charge. Whether to forgive her or not is my decision, and no one can influence it."
"Your previous agreements with her are no longer valid. You told her to stay out of my sight without asking for my opinion, which was unfair to me from the start."
"Grandpa, you've always been a good judge of character, but two people being together isn't just about compatibility. Lu Zhongyue and my mother are an example. If they had divorced back then, so many tragedies wouldn't have followed."
"I don't know if Zhou Wan is the right person for me, but she's the only one I can't let go of. She's the one who makes me feel that this world is still interesting. I don't want anyone but her."
Old Mr. Lu looked at the man before him—his grandson—and in a daze, he felt how quickly time had passed. He could hardly recognize A Xiao anymore.
He had truly grown up enough to stand on his own.
He was indeed different from Lu Zhongyue.
He had grown up wild, without the arrogance of a privileged young master. He meant what he said and was capable of letting go when necessary.
Today, he had brought Zhou Wan back not to seek his permission but to inform him and formally put the past to rest.
With things having reached this point, his refusal would not only fail to influence Lu Xixiao's decision but would also push him further away.
Old Mr. Lu remained silent for a long time, and when he spoke again, his voice was hoarse, devoid of its earlier authority.
In those few short minutes, he seemed to have aged suddenly.
"Even if she has been using you from the very beginning, you don't care anymore."
"That's right." Lu Xixiao sat upright, unwavering and composed, his tone calm. "As long as it's with her, even if I stumble or hit a wall, I'm willing."
After leaving the Lu residence, Zhou Wan's tears never stopped.
Zhou Wan understood Lu Xixiao's intention. She was used to running away, afraid to face things, so he brought her here to force her to confront her past self.
To face that hypocritical, selfish, and shadowy 16-year-old Zhou Wan.
Then, he gently embraced the helpless girl from her youth and told her, "It's okay. You can be like that. There's no need to feel ashamed or inferior because of it."
"I love you, and I will love all of you."
"I love you when you're radiant, and I love you when you're covered in Mud."
...Lu Xixiao handed Zhou Wan a tissue but didn't coax her to stop crying.
In some ways, they still fit together as perfectly as before—he gave her ample time to bid farewell to her past self through tears.
In silence, Lu Xixiao drove the car to the outskirts of a cemetery.
It was the resting place of Zhou Wan's grandmother.
She hadn't returned since leaving Pingshan City, nor had she visited her grandmother.
It wasn't that she hadn't thought about coming back. For one, plane tickets during winter and summer breaks were exorbitantly expensive. For another, she had always avoided it, too afraid to return.
Fortunately, back then, she had spent nearly all her savings on a decent cemetery—clean and well-maintained, with regular upkeep.
The cemetery was desolate. Zhou Wan gazed at her grandmother's photo on the tombstone.
"Grandma," she said softly, "I've come to see you. It's been... so long."
She spoke intermittently, sharing many things with her grandmother.
She told her she had graduated, where she attended university, the beautiful scenery she had seen, the remarkable people she had met. She told her that, even in her absence, her Wanwan had tried hard to grow up.
Lu Xixiao stood quietly by her side, accompanying her throughout.
Finally, Zhou Wan wiped the tears from her face and whispered, "Let's go."
"Mm."
They returned to the car.
Lu Xixiao had bought plane tickets back to City B.
As adults, life was always busy and exhausting. People came and went, replaced by new faces, few staying for long.
Unlike their youth, when every day at school meant seeing those familiar, vibrant faces.
"Zhou Wan," Lu Xixiao suddenly spoke.
She turned her head, her voice still choked. "Mm?"
"Do you remember? I promised you I would always be by your side."
Zhou Wan froze, her thoughts drifting back to the past.
Back then, right after her grandmother's passing, she had sunk into despair and collapse. It was Lu Xixiao who rushed to her home, holding her tightly in his arms. She had sobbed hoarsely against his chest, while he patted her shoulder, his eyes red, repeating patiently, "Wanwan, I'm here. I'll always be here."
...
People flowed past them.
But thankfully, neither of them had lost their way.
Back in City B, Lu Xixiao grabbed a pillow and a quilt and headed to the guest room.
Zhou Wan was taken aback. "What are you doing?"
"Didn't I say I'd properly pursue you again?" Lu Xixiao raised an eyebrow and smiled. "I've never seriously chased anyone before, but since I'm pursuing you, we shouldn't be sleeping together like this."
"..."
Zhou Wan thought to herself that they had already crossed that line, so this seemed unnecessary. Besides, although she wasn't ready to be with Lu Xixiao again so openly, she also felt awkward about letting him chase her.
She regretted how she always managed to make their relationship so strange.
But she didn't dare say it out loud, afraid it might sound like some kind of invitation.
Still, Lu Xixiao saw through her. He glanced sideways at her, his expression lazy and teasing. "Besides, sleeping with someone who's pursuing you—isn't that just testing me on purpose?"
"..."
Lu Xixiao leaned closer, pinching her chin and shaking it playfully. "I can't handle tests. I'm no Liu Xiahui. Remember to lock your door at night."
"..."
He was getting more and more outrageous.
Zhou Wan turned her head away, her face flushed, not daring to look at him again.She pretended to be serious and stopped engaging with him, walking over to turn on the computer.
While waiting for the computer to boot up, she recalled Lu Xixiao's earlier actions and couldn't help but curve her lips into a fleeting, secret smile.
Since returning from Pingchuan City, the tangled and complicated relationship between them seemed to have been straightened out, allowing them to interact openly and honestly now.
After Lu Xixiao finished tidying the guest room and took a shower, he came out to find Zhou Wan still sitting in front of the computer.
"What are you doing?" He poured two glasses of water, walked over, placed one beside Zhou Wan, sat down next to her, and glanced at her computer screen.
"Job applications," Zhou Wan said softly. "After leaving Shengxing, I sent out many resumes but didn't get any responses. I hadn't checked recently, but today I discovered nearly a hundred replies."
She paused, then couldn't resist overthinking. She glanced sideways at Lu Xixiao and asked, "Did you do something?"
"No."
Lu Xixiao chuckled. "With your resume, finding a job was never going to be a problem. Shengxing is struggling to stay afloat now and even has tax issues—they probably won't recover. Other companies don't need to hold back anymore, so of course they're eager to hire you."
Zhou Wan nodded and continued reading the replies.
"Have you decided which company to go with?" Lu Xixiao asked.
"I studied media in college. I thought new media was the future, so I focused on that area from my internship onward. But after working in it, I realized it's not really for me—it's not what I enjoy doing."
Zhou Wan continued, "Just now, I saw a message from a newspaper. I never applied to them; they reached out to me directly."
Lu Xixiao listened attentively. "You want to work at a newspaper?"
"...Yeah." Zhou Wan sounded hesitant. "What do you think?"
"You could give it a try and see if you like it."
"But traditional print media is a sunset industry after all. The career ceiling might not be as high as in new media." Zhou Wan paused. "If I go, would you... not like it?"
Lu Xixiao was taken aback, then laughed as if he'd heard something amusing. "What?"
"It's just... you're so accomplished. When you choose a partner, they should at least be somewhat on your level. That way, you wouldn't be settling."
Zhou Wan explained, "At Shengxing, I was already a department head. If I joined a similar company, my starting position wouldn't be low. But at a newspaper, I might have to start as an Intern Reporter. I'm not sure if I'd be good at it or if there's room for advancement."
Lu Xixiao realized Zhou Wan's train of thought was truly unique.
She was actually worrying about whether he'd be settling for her.
While Lu Xixiao was still pondering her peculiar logic and hadn't responded yet, Zhou Wan mistook his silence for serious consideration and grew nervous.
She quickly added, "But I'll work hard to do well."
Lu Xixiao: "..."
"I studied journalism in college too, so I'm not starting from zero. If I really join the newspaper, I'll work diligently, strive for promotions, and do my best to become more capable."
Her expression was so solemn and earnest, it was as if she were delivering a work report.
Lu Xixiao truly couldn't understand how dating had somehow led to all this.Zhou Wan paused briefly, lowered her gaze, and continued, "My roommate interned at a newspaper before. That year, B City had a severe cold wave with frost, and the crops suffered serious freeze damage. She spent the whole week helping farmers deal with the disaster. I want to help people like that too."
"Lu Xixiao, I won’t be like that anymore."
Her voice was soft, heavy, and tinged with embarrassment. She kept her head down, like a little girl awkwardly admitting her mistakes.
"I won’t lie to you anymore. I’ll discipline myself properly. I’ll improve—I will definitely improve... Lu Xixiao, I won’t let you down."
Lu Xixiao was taken aback.
It took him a moment to grasp what Zhou Wan meant.
He couldn’t help but curve his lips.
He found this version of Zhou Wan utterly candid and adorable.
He held back for a long time but ultimately couldn’t suppress it—he laughed out loud.
Even though Zhou Wan had spoken so earnestly and sincerely, Lu Xixiao’s response was laughter that shook his shoulders.
Zhou Wan looked at him, initially a bit displeased, but then froze when she saw him laughing so hard he slumped against the chairback.
It had been far too long since she had seen Lu Xixiao like this.
To be precise, even when she searched through her memories, she hadn’t seen him like this much.
The man in the tailored suit seemed to have transformed back into that unrestrained, spirited youth. His narrow eyes brimmed with laughter, his brows relaxed, the sharp lines of his face softened, and his entire being seemed gentler.
"Wanwan."
He said with a roguish grin, "Tell me, who’s chasing whom now?"
"..."
"You don’t actually have to change," Lu Xixiao said cheerfully. "After all, I’ve always liked you just the way you are—even the 'bad' parts."
"..."
He leaned in slightly, lowering his voice into a husky, suggestive tone laced with mischief: "For example, the way you wrapped your arms around my neck and seduced me the day before yesterday—I really liked that."
"..."
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