My Destiny

In the autumn of 2005, before the Mid-Autumn Festival, I received a letter from Zhao Kai. In it, he told me—his grandfather had passed away.

By then, Gao Xiang and I had already established our romantic relationship. The so-called "establishment" was nothing more than him treating Zhang Jiagui, Director Xu, and Li Juan to a meal in our names, during which he solemnly announced it. I hadn’t asked him to do that, but he believed that a necessary sense of ceremony was what made love a beautiful thing.

By then, Zhang Jiagui had already become "Brother Zhang" to Li Juan and me. Whenever there was any difficult or urgent matter at the shop, Li Juan wouldn’t hesitate to ask him for help, and he was always happy to assist.

After I returned to Shenzhen from Shenxianding, I had a sincere conversation with Zhang Jiagui.

I admitted that I had deceived him.

He said that on the day he helped Li Juan and me bring back the television, he had already guessed who I was.

I asked him, if my second sister came to Shenzhen, could she find a job at his place?

He said as long as her salary expectations weren’t too high, it would be completely possible. He mentioned that he had actually always wanted to help my eldest sister’s family financially but didn’t know exactly how to go about it. Helping openly might make my eldest sister’s husband feel it hurt his pride; helping secretly might lead to gossip. If he could help my second sister in her time of need, it would fulfill a wish of his.

But my second sister never came to Shenzhen. In the end, she decided to stay in Shenxianding to pick tea leaves. Because of the past relationship between Zhang Jiagui and my eldest sister, if Li Juan and I called him "Uncle," it would mess up the generational order, so we could only address him as "Brother," and he happily accepted it, saying it made him feel much younger.

By then, Director Xu had already been promoted to vice president of the TV university and had become a member of the city’s political consultative conference. He was extremely busy, and it wasn’t easy to see him anymore.

Our supermarket’s business was doing even better. After deducting rent and the self-set monthly salary of 2,500 yuan each, we already had a net profit of 70,000 yuan. I urged Juan several times to take back the 20,000 yuan she had initially invested, but she always said there was no hurry. What she said was true—with a salary, it was enough for her to fulfill her share of financial responsibilities each month.

At the time, I also took on the financial responsibility of supporting Zhao Kai’s education.

Before attending his parent-teacher meeting, I applied light makeup—it was the first time I had ever put cosmetics on my face. The parents were all farmers and farmwives. Even the township officials had mostly transferred their children to schools in the county town. My appearance almost became news.

After the parent-teacher meeting, the homeroom teacher spoke with me privately.

The teacher said she admired Zhao Kai quite a bit. If it were any other student who had experienced what happened to his father, they probably would have dropped out of school. But Zhao Kai returned to school on time, proving his resilience was quite strong. The teacher said he wasn’t particularly clever academically, but he was diligent. Most boys leaned toward science subjects, but he leaned toward the humanities. He loved long-distance running and had won several sports honors for the school, which could earn him extra points for the college entrance exam. It was estimated that getting into a second-tier university wouldn’t be a problem.

I also spoke with Zhao Kai once and asked him, "Do you really want to go to college?"

He said, "Yes."

I asked, "How confident are you?"

He said, "Completely confident."

His answer left me with nothing more to ask.

After a long silence, I had to say, "Then keep working hard. From now on, I’ll support your education."

He said, "I won’t let you down."He must have honestly told his classmates what kind of aunt I was to him. When I left, many students lined up to see me off. As soon as I stepped out of the school gate, those children from farming families shouted in unison, "Goodbye, Auntie! Auntie, we love you!" They probably all wished they had an aunt like me.

At that moment, my heart was filled with emotion.

Although I was merely Zhao Kai's aunt, I proved that relatives like me truly exist. That I could attend the parent-teacher conference as his aunt without avoiding the scandal likely seemed like a real-life fairy tale to them—this was my understanding of their reaction.

That day, I made a resolution—to follow through on my words. My commitment brought about a change in my second sister. She told her son that she would attend his parent-teacher meetings in the future and even moved my biological father into her home to live with her.

I never expected that my biological father's death would grieve me for so many days, and I dreamed of him repeatedly. After all, my life was given by my parents; I didn't just spring from a crack in a stone. I had never once seen my biological mother, not even a photo of her, which inevitably felt like a regret in my life. People are strange—to have never met one's biological mother before she died. For some, such a thing can become a "tuberculosis" of the soul, and that is entirely self-inflicted. Later, that kind of "tuberculosis" appeared in my soul—fortunately, I had met my biological father three times. The last time, I even gave him fifteen hundred yuan, washed his clothes, and cooked him a meal. I finally called him "Dad" too...

In the quiet of the night, I tearfully poured out my sorrows, which affected Juan's mood.

One night, I was awakened by her crying.

I asked her why she was crying.

She said, "I'm scared..."

Thinking she had a nightmare, I teased her.

She said, "It wasn't a nightmare. I'm afraid that one day, either my dad or my mom will die first. They haven't had a good life up to now. The more I think about it, the more afraid I am, and the more afraid I am, the more I think about it... Wan Zhi, if that day really comes, I'm afraid I won't be able to bear it. If I touch an electric socket, don't stop me..." As she spoke, she burst into loud sobs.

This was Juan—working hard, living frugally, and saving every penny, all so her parents could live a few years of what she called a good life before they died; all to help her younger brother marry and start a family; all to support Company Commander Zhou's son in taking the college entrance exams...

Every yuan seemed to be earned and saved for others, as if it had nothing to do with herself.

I hugged her and comforted her repeatedly, "Juan, my Juan, your wishes will come true, they all will..."

During the National Day holiday, business was surprisingly good—a residential complex had opened a back gate on that street, and many residents became new customers, mostly elderly women. During those days, Juan and I, to win them over and turn them into regulars, spoke as if our lips were coated with honey. It could be said, "What dispels sorrow? Only collecting payments." Gao Xiang also gave me a pleasant surprise—one of his photography works was exhibited and won an award. He used the prize money to buy two Nokia phones, one of which was for me. He was going to Tibet for inspiration, and with phones, we could easily talk anytime. The phones were also important for Juan and me—whoever went out would take one, allowing us to discuss many situations promptly.

In the blink of an eye, it was November.

One day, as I was tidying the shelves, I heard Juan shouting at the door, "Wan Zhi, come quick! Hurry!"I hurried to the doorway and saw a charming woman holding a white Pekingese, smiling warmly as she stood before Juan.

Juan said to me with a stern face, "She's impersonating our Qian Qian. What do you think we should do?"

I sized up the woman. Though she wore heavy makeup, rings on her fingers, bracelets on her wrists, earrings dangling from her ears, a scarf tied around her head, and boots on her feet—looking thoroughly modern—it was indeed Qian Qian!

But I deliberately said, "Don't know her. Kick her out!"

So we both tried to shoo her away. She giggled, holding the little dog as she played hide-and-seek with us among the shelves. The dog barked angrily at us, startling Little Friend, who was lying on the windowsill. Little Friend leaped onto the loft bed and glared down at the dog, puffing up his whiskers.

After the three of us sisters had fooled around for a while, I said, "Enough, enough! I can't catch my breath. Let's sit down and have a proper chat."

So Juan hung up the "Closed" sign, shut the door, and curtsied to invite Qian Qian up to the loft bed.

Qian Qian glanced upward and frowned. "Going up and down like that, it's not necessary. I'm just happy to have found you two. I have things to do and need to leave soon."

She sat down on the small ladder.

The little dog continued to bare its teeth and bark at us. To calm it down, Juan peeled a small sausage and offered it to the dog. Not only did it refuse to eat, but it barked even more fiercely.

Qian Qian said, "It won't eat that kind of thing. It won't even eat dog food anymore—only imported canned dog food."

Juan pretended to be angry. "What a spoiled brat! Then you make it quiet down, or I'll grab it by the tail and throw it out!"

Qian Qian took something from her bag and stuffed it into the dog's mouth, finally silencing it. She said it was imported dog treats she had fed it.

Juan stretched her arm to offer the sausage to Little Friend, but Little Friend, still frightened, refused to eat and hid deeper into the loft bed.

"If no one wants it, I'll eat it. It's already peeled—can't let it go to waste."

Juan ate the sausage with great relish.

I took two small plastic stools from the shelf and placed them in front of Qian Qian. Juan and I sat down to chat with her.

Qian Qian said she had spent nearly a year living in various European countries and had only recently returned to Shenzhen. As soon as she came back, she had been searching everywhere for Juan and me, never expecting to reunite with us here.

Several times, I wanted to ask about the things that concerned me—like how her child was doing, how she felt about being a mother, whether she had found a job—but each time, Juan steered the conversation away or stopped me with a dry cough.

Qian Qian invited us to spend a whole day together on Sunday.

Juan said spending an hour or two together would be fine, but a whole day was absolutely impossible—it would seriously affect our income.

Qian Qian chided, "Isn't that a bit too vulgar? Is friendship worth so little? Can't it even compare to a day's income from this little shop of yours? How much can you earn in a day? I'll double it for both of you."

Juan didn't like hearing that and looked a bit embarrassed.

Afraid that she and Qian Qian would start bickering as soon as they met, I quickly agreed wholeheartedly.

Qian Qian left as abruptly as she had come. Just before stepping out the door, she took out a small mirror to touch up her makeup. Watching her get into a red sports car, Juan took down the "Closed" sign from the door handle.

As the sports car drove away, we retreated into the shop.

Juan asked, "Do you know why I interrupted you several times?"

I said, "I didn't know then, but I understand now."

"Do you think she's still Liu Zhu's wife?"

"Maybe... not anymore."

"What do you mean 'maybe'? Of course she isn't anymore!"

"Well... we still have to treat her as one of our sisters.""Do you still think she's the Qian Qian we used to know?"

"She's... changed a bit..."

"Just a bit? Remember when I said she'd have a lot of stories to tell?"

"I remember."

"I know her better than you do. When it comes to certain things, even if no one asks her, she'll go chasing after what she wants. She's not one to sit idle—she's got a strong will."

"I'm not jealous of her..."

"Are you implying that I'm jealous?"

"That's not what I meant, Juan, please don't misunderstand. I just meant that since she reached out to us, it shows she still considers us friends. So, the plans I made for us, you won't back out, right?"

"If it were up to me, we could just make an excuse and cancel when the day comes..."

"I object!"

"Alright, alright, don't get upset. But you have to remember—no prying. Don't ask about anything she doesn't bring up herself. Even if she does share something, we'll just listen, no unnecessary comments!"

"I'll follow your lead."

"And one more thing—you need to understand this: once a friend becomes wealthy, unless you're wealthy too, it's best to part ways and go your separate paths!"

"I agree in principle."

After Juan and I had this conversation about Qian Qian, we didn't mention her again for the next few days. Both of us were afraid of arguing over her.

On Sunday, before Qian Qian arrived, we both put on our best clothes and wore light makeup.

For me, it was out of courtesy and respect for a former close friend.

For Juan, it seemed more about maintaining her own image.

She said, "What woman doesn't want to look her best? We can't let Qian Qian make us look like haggard old ladies!"

"Don't put it so harshly!" I gave her a light tap.

Qian Qian didn't bring her dog, and surprisingly, she wasn't wearing makeup either. I figured she'd skipped it to spare our feelings. Not only was she makeup-free, but her outfit was also quite ordinary. This thought warmed my heart. Without makeup, Qian Qian's skin looked incredibly smooth—like a peeled egg or flawless jade. I couldn't see her small hands because she wore a pair of snow-white silk gloves, but I imagined they were just as delicate and well-cared-for.

I couldn't help but glance down at my own hands. From moving goods all day, wiping things here and there, constantly switching between wet and dry, they'd grown rough and calloused.

I noticed Juan giving me a meaningful smile.

Sensitive, I whispered, "What are you smiling at?"

She said, "Am I not even allowed to smile in this car?"—then gently took one of my hands, turning her face toward the window.

Qian Qian asked, "Am I a bit fairer than when we worked together in the kitchen?"

Juan replied, "You're practically turning into Snow White."

Qian Qian mentioned she often got injections of some beauty treatment abroad—expensive but effective.

Juan suddenly asked, "Did you get plastic surgery?"

Qian Qian giggled, impressed. "You've got a sharp eye—Wan Zhi didn't notice."

"I really didn't," I admitted honestly, acknowledging my lack of observation.

"Just a little touch-up, nothing major... Oh, by the way, I should tell you both—Liu Zhu and I split up. We've already finalized everything..." Qian Qian abruptly changed the subject.I kept Juan's advice firmly in mind, letting out only an "ah" to acknowledge I'd heard her words, not uttering a single syllable more.

Yet Juan broke her own rule, speaking from the heart: "Qian Qian, he's simply not a good match for you. The sooner you end it, the better. But Uncle Liu is a decent man—he's always looked out for us three sisters. Out of respect for Uncle Liu, you should handle things in a way that doesn't let him and his son down."

Juan's words carried a tone reminiscent of a stern mother lecturing her child.

Qian Qian replied, "Of course. But when it comes to financial details, I won't drag things out."

The mention of "money" made my heart waver again.

To be fair, Juan really went all out to recapture the feeling of our old sisterhood. She did everything she could to cheer Qian Qian and me up—telling Northeastern jokes one moment, singing a few lines of errenzhuan the next, then pretending to be carsick and tricking me into pressing her philtrum and pinching her earlobes. When we stopped, she even rushed out of the car first to open the door for Qian Qian, playing the part of a female attendant and drawing curious glances from passersby.

Qian Qian also performed admirably. Wherever Juan and I suggested going, she drove there without a word. Even if we arrived and found the place uninteresting, not bothering to get out of the car, Qian Qian would say, "Having fun should be like this—following your heart is best. Once you two agree, just give the order. Wherever we go, it's just a turn of the wheel and a step on the gas. If you're happy, I'm happy. My job is to be your driver."

Later, we went to Zhuhai, gazing across the bay at Macau. Qian Qian said that when Juan and I had time, she'd love to take us to Hong Kong and Macau, then on to "Singapore, Malaysia, and Thailand," and Japan—all expenses on her. She admitted she hadn't been to those cities or countries either and really hoped we'd accompany her.

I overheard her whispering to Juan, "Spending a man's money feels incredible. If a man is willing to let you spend it, why not? But how much can I spend alone? You two are my sisters—letting you share in this is the least I can do for our bond."

Frankly, I disliked her way of thinking.

Frankly, her words also moved me.

I could see our dynamic had shifted—back when we were all kitchen helpers, Juan had played the role of "big sister," and Qian Qian and I had always followed her lead. That day, however, Qian Qian became the central figure, and Juan and I unconsciously adapted to her. Wherever she suggested taking a photo, we immediately walked over and stood ready, leaving the middle spot for her. In the past, it was always me or Juan in the middle—never Qian Qian—because I was the tallest and she was the shortest. That day, height no longer mattered, and Qian Qian's expression as she took the center spot seemed entirely natural. As soon as the photo was taken, I slung her camera over my shoulder. It was a high-end model, large and heavy. I'd seen a similar one at Gao Xiang's place, but not as big as Qian Qian's. Juan bought an umbrella and held it over Qian Qian when we weren't taking photos, saying that since Qian Qian was the fairest among us three sisters, she deserved extra protection to avoid getting tanned.

At noon, we had a lavish seafood feast at Zhuhai's finest restaurant, with Qian Qian, as usual, seated in the middle. No matter what was served, Juan never complained about the price, acting as if it were a feast not to be missed.

Qian Qian teased her, saying she'd turned into a great white shark.

Truth be told, I also ate with a sense of entitlement and great enjoyment.It was past four in the afternoon when Qian Qian finally brought Juan and me back.

The three of us sisters were saying our goodbyes at the shop entrance when suddenly a man’s furious voice roared, "Zhang Qianqian, let’s see where you can hide today!"

Startled, the three of us turned around and saw a man in dirty clothes and trousers, holding a child about a year old, who had seemingly appeared out of nowhere. He wore a pair of plastic sandals, and his feet looked unwashed for days. His hair was long, his face unshaven, and his eyes were wide with anger. The child in his arms was equally dirty and listless.

It was Liu Zhu.

For a moment, the three of us were thrown into panic.

I said, "Qian Qian, hurry inside the shop."

Juan frantically took out the keys to unlock the shop door, but Liu Zhu rushed forward two steps and shoved her aside with his shoulder.

The keys fell to the ground.

As I tried to pick them up, Liu Zhu stepped on them with his foot.

Qian Qian, however, was the first to regain her composure. With her hands on her hips, she stood her ground and said defiantly, "Liu Zhu, what do you think you’re doing?!"

Liu Zhu sneered, "What else? Now that I’ve found you, I won’t rest until I take you back home!"

Qian Qian was furious too and snapped, "Pah! What right do you have? The divorce papers are signed, and you’ve taken the money. What authority do you have? In broad daylight, are you trying to kidnap someone?!"

Liu Zhu said, "I regret it! I don’t want the money anymore—I want my wife back!"

Qian Qian retorted, "Look at yourself! Do you even deserve a wife? I gave your Liu family a healthy son and a large sum of money, and now you pull this trick! Look at how you’ve ruined such a fine son! Do you have the nerve to show your face in front of us three sisters?!"

At that moment, the entire street was deserted.

The child recognized Qian Qian and stretched out his arms, crying, "Mommy, Mommy..."

Juan and I were at a loss for what to do.

"Zhang Qianqian, I’ll ask one last time—are you coming with me or not?!"

Liu Zhu put the child down, his eyes gleaming with menace.

"Liu Zhu, you’re dreaming! Don’t come any closer, or I’ll spray you with pepper spray!..."

Qian Qian quickly pulled a small bottle from her bag and held it up defensively.

But Liu Zhu was faster—he drew a sheathed knife from behind his waist...

What happened next took only a few seconds.

First, the knife sheath fell at my feet. As I looked down, I heard Li Juan shout, "Liu Zhu, don’t!..."

When I turned to look at Juan—the knife was already inside her, with only the handle visible. Juan spread her arms wide, looking down at the handle...

Then I heard Liu Zhu let out a strange cry. When I looked at him again, he was covering his face with both hands, spinning around uncontrollably, and then he crashed headfirst into a tree...

I couldn’t help but turn to look at Qian Qian. She was still holding the small bottle in one hand while wrapping her other arm around Juan’s waist. I watched helplessly as the two of them collapsed to the ground.

The terrified child was crying and shouting as he ran off the sidewalk onto the road, stopping right in the middle of the street. I couldn’t make out what he was yelling.

Juan pointed at the child and shouted to me, "Quick! The child... don’t let him get hit..."

A car was speeding toward us.

I rushed into the road, scooped up the child, and had no time to turn back, so I kept running to the other side of the street.

Standing across the road, I looked back and saw Qian Qian holding Juan in her arms, crying out, "Someone, help! Please, someone help us!..."

My mind went completely blank.