Xianglan turned her head to gaze at the sparse rockeries and the red plum blossoms planted in the courtyard. She exhaled a puff of white breath and asked softly, "Why is the Marquis telling me this?"
Yuan Shaoren said, "It's just that this is the first time I've seen Eagle Soar like this. He's actually quite sentimental—actually, I understand there are other circumstances between you two, and as an outsider I shouldn't speak out of turn. I just—I just—" He stammered for a long moment before sighing, "I just think you're wonderful, and I hope you'll have a good life in the future." He lowered his head and saw Xianglan's snow-white face slightly flushed from the cold, her clear eyes sparkling as they met his. Yuan Shaoren's heart trembled slightly, and he turned his face away, saying, "As long as you know your own mind. Everyone in the Lin Family is shrewd. Seeing how much Eagle Soar cares for you and how highly your mother-in-law regards you, you should plan carefully for the future—at least consider how things will be when he marries later, how your life will be. If it becomes truly difficult, you could have Eagle Soar set up another residence for you to live separately."
Xianglan was taken aback but grateful for Yuan Shaoren's concern. She curtsied and said, "Thank you for your kindness, Marquis." Rising, she smiled and said, "Over these years, my heart has grown much broader than before. No matter how difficult life gets, I've learned not to trouble myself over it. What once seemed like insurmountable obstacles, I've gradually let go of now. When the heart is broad, the world becomes broad. As for what the future holds, I'd rather not think too much about it now. No matter how much I used to worry and plan thousands of times, it couldn't withstand life's unpredictability." After a pause, she asked, "How is De Ge'er?"
Yuan Shaoren hadn't expected Xianglan to ask this. Remembering his young son, he smiled and said, "Him? That carefree little fellow eats well, sleeps well, and is growing taller."
Xianglan nodded with a gentle smile, watching the sparrows landing in the courtyard. She sighed, "I often wish we could remain forever at De Ge'er's age—carefree and untroubled. But we all must grow up, experiencing life's storms and fluctuations throughout our lives. Whether serving as maids or old women, becoming officials or ministers, marrying into families, or achieving great deeds—however one lives, there are endless troubles and incidents. The trials meant for you cannot be avoided; life's lessons must always be completed. The Marquis truly needn't worry about me."
Yuan Shaoren was startled, waves of emotion stirring in his heart. He cupped his hands in salute and said, "I was wrong to forget you possess such breadth of mind. As I said before, I respect your character. Should you encounter any difficulties in the future, I will certainly assist you."
Xianglan curtsied again and said, "Marquis, the weather is cold and the wind sharp. I must take my leave now. Please take care as well." Yuan Shaoren saluted with clasped hands, and they parted ways.
Xianglan stood in the courtyard for a while, lifting her face to see the clear sky with scattered clouds. Only when a maid came to call her did she slowly return indoors. Without further digression, Tao Hongxun arrived shortly after and spoke with Lin Jinlou in the room for about half an hour before taking his leave.
Soon after, Wu Mama entered with several maids and old women carrying identical embroidered silk gilded five-colored large boxes. Wu Mama said to Xianglan, "The Old Master is hosting a family banquet. The Old Mistress originally wanted you to attend, but Taitai, concerned that Master might lack attentive care, reported that you haven't been feeling well these past couple days. She secretly had these dishes sent over—two of which are specially awarded to you by the Old Mistress."Xianglan expressed her thanks and instructed Xiao Juan to fetch the reward money. Hua Shan lifted the lid of the presentation box, revealing two bowls of dishes inside. Ling Qing and Ling Su carefully brought them out and placed them on the heated brick bed table. As usual, Xianglan attended to Lin Jinlou first, having him rinse his mouth with tea before adjusting the pillow behind him to a higher position. Although Lin Jinlou was recovering, his complexion remained pale and sallow, the flesh on his cheeks completely sunken, leaving him looking particularly haggard. Xianglan sighed silently to herself. She felt that the tangled debts of gratitude and resentment between her and Lin Jinlou were like a messy account book—she always wanted to repay it quickly and break free, yet time and again, it was a cycle of repaying and owing, entangling them until now, when she could no longer calculate whether she was in debt or had repaid enough. She no longer wished to tally it up; all past grievances, resentments, gratitude, and warmth had blurred into an indistinguishable haze. She simply let it be, now only hoping he would recover soon.
Lin Jinlou, however, seemed preoccupied. Ever since Tao Hongxun left, he had been absentminded. After the meal, he unusually obediently took his medicine and remained quiet and still. Shortly after, Xianglan also finished her meal and instructed the maids to clear away the leftovers. She went to the desk to help Lin Jinlou manage his official duties, but he only had her write a few invitation cards, asking his usual acquaintances to visit the residence, and replied to the most urgent letters before instructing Xianglan to hand them over to Shuran. Then he lay on the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. Xianglan did not disturb him. She sat by the bed reading for a while, quietly handled minor tasks in the room, urged Lin Jinlou to take his medicine again, attended to his washing, and hastily completed her own ablutions. Finally, she changed the dressing on his wound and felt somewhat relieved to see it had improved compared to the previous day. As she finished tidying up and was about to lower the bed curtains and extinguish the lamp, Lin Jinlou grabbed her wrist and said, "Sleep here tonight."
Xianglan glanced toward the inner side of the bed. "How can that be? It’s inconvenient for me to get up if I sleep inside. I’ll sleep on the couch outside—I’ll hear you if you call."
Lin Jinlou said, "Sleep here. I heard you had a nightmare last night—I even heard you cry out. Tonight, sleep here. I’ll chase away any demons or evil spirits for you." Seeing Xianglan hesitate, he couldn’t help adding, "Hurry up, don’t dawdle." Then, realizing his tone was too harsh, he lowered his voice two notches and said, "Come up and sleep now."
Xianglan had no choice but to extinguish the outer lamp, lower the bed curtains, carefully step over Lin Jinlou to the inner side of the bed, pull up the quilt, and lie down. She slept restlessly in the first half of the night. Lin Jinlou occasionally turned in his sleep, each time waking from the pain of his wound pulling, yet he strove to suppress any sound. Only then did Xianglan realize why, when she helped him wash in the morning, she always found his inner clothes damp—it was all from the cold sweat soaked through from the pain. She quietly got up, threw on her clothes, fetched a towel to wipe him down, and placed a piece of calming star incense in the lotus-shaped bronze censor, setting it by the bedside. Lin Jinlou said hoarsely, "Go back to sleep. Don’t worry about me. It doesn’t hurt that much anymore."Xianglan paid no heed. She retrieved the ointment, applied a fresh layer to the wound, and only then lay down. She dared not fall asleep, keeping her ears pricked for any movement from Lin Jinlou. Hearing that he had quietly drifted into slumber, she stealthily rose, parted the curtain a crack, and peered through the dim light. Lin Jinlou was already deep in sleep, his face appearing softer and more youthful and innocent than when he was awake. Xianglan gazed at him for a long while, an inexplicable pang of sorrow tugging at her heart. She lay back down quietly, thinking to herself that she was being overly sentimental—why else would the sight of Lin Jinlou lying in bed, tormented by pain, stir such sadness within her?
Clutching the quilt, her mind wandered into chaotic thoughts, and in her drowsy state, she seemed to wander back into the dense forest, wielding a large blade as she swung it toward Lu Shaotang’s head. The man fell forward without a sound, a feathered arrow piercing straight through his chest, blood gushing forth. Xianglan jolted awake, unable to suppress a startled cry, repeatedly murmuring, "I didn’t mean to kill you!" In her panic, an arm wrapped around her, and a voice whispered in her ear, "It wasn’t you who wanted him dead. He was a criminal who deserved to die." The words were repeated several times before Xianglan fully regained her senses. Then she heard Lin Jinlou’s voice say, "You’ve never done anything wrong in your life. You killed to save me—this blood debt falls on me, not you—" He gritted his teeth against the pain from his wound, his body trembling slightly, then suddenly bent down and kissed her temple. Nestled against his side, Xianglan remained motionless, closing her eyes as a single tear rolled down her cheek.
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