In the golden October, the two "single and accomplished" young men at Zhi Kun Law Firm were faced with a daunting task: accompanying their boss to fetch the bride.
Chen Hui had initially been unhappy about having to work overtime as a groomsman during the National Day holiday. But when he arrived at Xu Huaisong’s newly purchased apartment in downtown Hangzhou early on the wedding day and did the math, realizing the red envelopes contained five times his usual salary, he cheerfully declared, "Feel free to call me for this kind of work anytime!"
Of course, this earned him a sharp glare from Xu Huaisong: "Anytime? How about our golden anniversary in fifty years? As long as you're still single by then, I’ll invite you to be my groomsman again."
Chen Hui clutched his chest in exaggerated pain, his heart thoroughly stabbed.
Beside him, Zhou Jun, another groomsman, chuckled.
Liu Mao nudged Chen Hui with his elbow. "Don’t let Lawyer Xu down. As for me, I won’t be able to join you by then."
"Brother Mao," Chen Hui teased, emboldened by the festive atmosphere and ignoring workplace hierarchy, "You’re the oldest in our groomsmen squad. Shouldn’t you be the most eager to settle down?"
Liu Mao clicked his tongue in displeasure.
From the other end of the sofa, the fourth groomsman finally couldn’t take it anymore and let out a long sigh.
The two turned to Zhao Yi, only to hear him sigh with the wisdom of an elder: "Brothers, the pot shouldn’t call the kettle black. ‘If young you don’t work hard, old you will be left in sorrow.’ Didn’t you guys think ahead back in school?"
The two froze. Xu Huaishi, sitting next to Zhao Yi, raised her hand and flicked his forehead. "Is that how you use ‘think ahead’? Not everyone spent their school days flirting like you did!"
Zhao Yi choked.
Liu Mao countered with a sigh, "Seems like young Zhao here is destined to be henpecked too."
Xu Huaisong, sitting in the middle, suddenly joined the fray. "What do you mean by ‘too’?"
"Whoever takes it to heart knows exactly what I mean."
Xu Huaishi giggled. "Brother, just give up. Should I call Sister Mingying right now and let you tell her over the phone that you’re not henpecked? Let’s see if this wedding still happens today."
Xu Huaisong stared at her expressionlessly. "You’re not coming with me to fetch your sister-in-law later."
"Why not? Mom assigned me the task of carrying the copper brazier!"
Zhao Yi explained on Xu Huaisong’s behalf, "Just look at whose side you’re on. If you switch sides mid-battle, won’t the bridesmaids tear us apart?"
Xu Huaishi glared at him. "You’re the one they’ll tear apart. Later, you better take the hits for my brother, got it?"
Zhao Yi muttered a quiet "Oh," then lowered his voice. "I’ll take the hits for him today, but who’s gonna take them for me in the future…"
Once the auspicious hour arrived, the group boarded the wedding cars and headed to the Ruan family’s suburban home. Just getting through the front door took half an hour.
The Ruan relatives had put on quite the spectacle—a crowd of children blocked the entrance, demanding candy. Xu Huaisong handed out red envelopes like flyers, while Zhao Yi cheerfully announced, "No rush, no rush! There’s enough for everyone! Any problem that can be solved with money isn’t a problem at all!"
Xu Huaishi facepalmed in exasperation.
After much effort, they finally made it upstairs, only to find a quiz board blocking the second-floor landing. Shen Mingying, dressed in a bridesmaid gown, made her entrance and declared, "Want to see the bride? Answer first! Get it right, move up. Get it wrong—thirty push-ups."
Zhao Yi waved it off like it was nothing. "Brothers, you handle the questions. I’ll take care of the push-ups!"
Chen Hui shot him a look. "Kid, do you even know how to talk? Since when would our Brother Song get a question wrong?"Xu Huaisong didn't speak, thinking it might not be so certain after all.
Liu Mao, noticing his uncertain expression, quietly tugged his sleeve: "What kind of question is it? Didn't she give you any hints?"
Xu Huaisong wished she had. A few days ago, while Ruan Yu was showering, he'd sneaked into her laptop to steal the questions. After overcoming numerous obstacles, he finally managed to open an encrypted file, only to see a line in bold, enlarged Song font on the Word document: "Shame on you for seeing this line."
Ashamed, his conscience got the better of him, and he couldn't bring himself to ask her for the answers.
The bridesmaids behind Shen Mingying began urging the groom to pick a question, telling him to choose a number from one to ten.
Xu Huaisong said, "Seven."
Shen Mingying flipped open the answer board: "Groom, how many floor tiles are there from the back door of Class 9, Grade 12 at Su City No.1 High School to the front door of Class 10, Grade 12?"
Zhao Yi froze, already dropping to the ground ready to do push-ups.
Xu Huaisong blinked and looked at Xu Huaishi.
"Bro, don't look at me! Zhao Yi and I were in Class 7. Besides, who in their right mind would count floor tiles?"
Xu Huaisong blinked again, then turned to Zhou Jun.
"Hey, Huaisong... I was in Class 9, but I didn't have a crush in Class 10."
The bridesmaids had already started the countdown.
Xu Huaisong thought for a moment and, when they reached "three," said, "Twenty-three."
This time it was Shen Mingying's turn to freeze. After checking the answer, she said, "How did you guess that right?"
Xu Huaisong smiled. "It wasn't a guess. I was the one who counted them back then—in my right mind."
Zhao Yi scrambled up. "Then why were you hesitating earlier, Song-ge?"
"Answering too quickly would rob her of the sense of accomplishment."
"..."
Everyone rubbed their arms, trying to smooth out the goosebumps from the cheesiness.
Xu Huaishi sighed and turned to Zhao Yi. "Take notes."
Having successfully reached the third floor and the bride's room, Xu Huaishi immediately spotted Ruan Yu sitting on the bed in her red wedding dress. "Wow!" she exclaimed. "Sis-in-law, how did my brother ever deserve to marry a fairy like you?"
Ruan Yu, looking at the bouquet-holding, ramrod-straight Xu Huaisong, smiled and said, "He hasn't married me yet, has he?"
Shen Mingying piped up again: "Exactly! If you want to take her away, find the bride's shoes first!" She pulled out her phone to start the timer. "Two shoes, within this room, five minutes."
The groomsmen scattered, each searching a different corner.
Only Xu Huaisong remained motionless in front of Ruan Yu's bed.
Shen Mingying eyed him. "Not feeling motivated? Don't want to marry Yu-yu anymore?"
He smiled faintly. "They're using their hands. I'm using my eyes."
Ruan Yu was irritated by his confident demeanor. "Dare you find them within two minutes and see what happens?"
Xu Huaisong said, "Oh," deciding to stall for two minutes and chat with her instead. "That seventh question earlier—was it the easiest one?"
"How did you know?"
"Because last year when you made me do that mock bar exam, I chose the seventh set. Logically, I should have assumed you'd set a trap in the seventh question and avoided it."
"And this time?"
"I still chose seven."
Crafty.
Ruan Yu shot him a glare. Turning her head, she saw Zhao Yi pointing at the bag on her nightstand. "Senior, can we search your bag?"
She blinked in surprise.
Zhao Yi understood everything. "Found one! There's a shoe in the bag."Xu Huaisong glanced at his wristwatch and saw only a minute and a half had passed. "Not my fault," he said.
Ruan Yu huffed softly. "There's still another one, isn't there?"
But the other shoe was truly nowhere to be found.
The group turned the place upside down, even crawling under the bed, but still couldn't find it.
With just thirty seconds left, Xu Huaisong checked his watch again and told the groomsmen, "Stop looking."
Ruan Yu knew from his confident expression that they were about to lose again. Sure enough, he looked at the other bridesmaid standing beside Shen Mingying—the one with a floor-length gown—and said, "The other one is tied to this lady's leg. Whoever's comfortable, go retrieve it."
The girl didn't seem embarrassed at being found out. Smiling, she lifted her skirt slightly. "If you take it, you'll have to take responsibility."
Zhao Yi immediately sidled closer to Xu Huaishi. "Brother Song, I'm taken—not very convenient!"
Chen Hui's face had already turned red. "This... this isn't appropriate..."
Zhou Jun scratched his head. "Maybe Lawyer Liu should go."
Liu Mao eyed the girl opposite him, whose expression clearly said, "Come and get it if you dare," and grew wary.
Author's note: Liu Mao: Helping a brother marry his own blind date, only to end up getting himself involved in the end. :)
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