Ruan Yu was in a daze the entire time, mechanically following Xu Huaisong's every arrangement.
It wasn’t until she arrived at the hotel with her bag, heard the "beep" of the key card unlocking the door, that she finally snapped out of the chaos of the evening and exclaimed in shock, "Why aren’t I staying at Mingying’s place?"
Xu Huaisong gave her a look that clearly said, You’re asking me?
Speak of the devil. Shen Mingying’s call came through.
Ruan Yu answered, hearing the question on the other end: "How are you holding up?"
"I’m fine now."
"Did you go home?"
"It might not be safe there, so I didn’t."
"Then where are you? Come to my place! I’ll kick my boyfriend out."
"Uh…" Ruan Yu hesitated, watching helplessly as Xu Huaisong took her bag from her hand and carried it inside. She had no choice but to follow him in.
The door clicked shut behind them. Shen Mingying, sharp as ever, immediately asked, "You got a room?"
"Yeah." To be precise, she hadn’t been the one to book it.
Ruan Yu hesitated, then pulled the phone away from her ear and turned to Xu Huaisong, who was now picking up the kettle. "Maybe I should just go to Mingying’s place after all?"
He glanced at her. "I’ve been driving all night."
The implication: I’m too tired to drive again.
With that, he went to boil water. Meanwhile, Shen Mingying’s voice exploded from the phone: "Oh my god, a man ?! Ruan Yu, you’ve really outdone yourself!"
"..."
Ruan Yu quickly covered the speaker and whispered, "It’s not what you think."
"No, I hope it’s what I think. Is it that blind date guy? Didn’t you go to dinner with him?"
Afraid that mentioning "Xu Huaisong" would make Shen Mingying blow her cover, she just said, "I’ll explain tomorrow," and hung up.
Silence settled around her. Ruan Yu stood still, taking a careful look around.
It was a high-end suite, with the living room and bedroom separated. The east side of the living room had a small balcony and kitchenette, and there was even a piano on the balcony—practically a mini apartment.
Probably where Xu Huaisong had been staying long-term recently.
Ruan Yu walked over to the kitchen counter and said, "I’ll just go book a standard room downstairs..."
Xu Huaisong crouched to open the fridge and replied without looking up, "I’ll go."
She rubbed her nose sheepishly. "Oh… Then I’ll cover the room fee."
Xu Huaisong glanced up at her but didn’t respond, instead asking, "Want something to eat? Only instant meals here."
Only then did Ruan Yu realize she hadn’t eaten dinner. But maybe because she’d gone past hunger, she had no appetite. "Anything’s fine."
Xu Huaisong took out a pack of instant rice and curry, heated them for her, then picked up his laptop and a cat carrier.
Ruan Yu’s gaze lingered on the carrier, peeking inside to see a small orange tabby fast asleep. She lowered her voice to a whisper. "You brought your cat?"
Xu Huaisong nodded. At the door, he turned back and added, "The bedsheets and toiletries are new. I won’t be sleeping tonight—call if you need anything."
Oh. Right—he’d just returned from abroad yesterday and was still adjusting to the time difference.
She gave a quiet "Mm," and after he left, she forced down a few bites of food before exhaustion drove her to shower and collapse into bed. But now that she was actually trying to sleep, she found herself too drained to drift off.
She was a bit particular about beds.
Pulling out her phone, she deliberately avoided the Weibo icon and opened WeChat instead. Scrolling aimlessly, she somehow ended up on Xu Huaisong’s chat window.The cursor blinked as she typed: [Lawyer Xu, I forgot to thank you earlier. Today wouldn’t have gone smoothly without you.]
Xu Huaisong: [No problem.]
Ruan Yu: [I’m going to sleep now. If you need anything during the night, feel free to wake me.]
Xu Huaisong: [Goodnight.]
Ruan Yu paused. Xu Huaisong actually knew how to say goodnight to someone?
Following the principle of reciprocity, she replied: [Goodnight.]
The next second, Xu Huaisong sent: [Go to sleep.]
Huh? This sounded exactly like the perfect male leads she often wrote about in her novels—the kind who never let the female lead end the conversation first. What kind of spell had this unattainable flower fallen under today?
Her thoughts gradually grew hazy, and she finally drifted off to sleep. But when she woke up again, she felt suffocated and paralyzed, as if weighed down by a ghost.
The bedroom was still pitch black. She picked up her phone and saw it was 2 a.m.
The temperature difference between her palm and the phone quickly made her realize she was running a fever.
All the stress from the past month had finally erupted after the night’s chaotic events.
She barely had the strength to speak, only feeling unbearably thirsty.
Ruan Yu threw off the covers and struggled to the living room in search of water. Spotting bottled water, she hesitated, afraid cold water might worsen her condition, so she turned to look for the electric kettle instead.
But she couldn’t remember where the kettle had been placed. Dizzy and disoriented, she searched fruitlessly for a while.
Remembering Xu Huaisong had said he wouldn’t be sleeping, she pulled out her phone and typed with effort: [Lawyer Xu, where did you put the kettle?]
Xu Huaisong: [It should be on the second shelf of the kitchen cabinet. Not there?]
She crouched down to search for it. Just as she found it, filled it with water, and plugged it in, the doorbell rang. At the same time, another message arrived: [It’s me. Open the door.]
Her head spinning, Ruan Yu dragged herself to the door and opened it, her voice hoarse as she said, “I found it. Sorry to trouble you.”
But Xu Huaisong immediately noticed her pallor. Instinctively, he reached out to touch her forehead, then frowned and stepped inside, closing the door behind him. “Why didn’t you say you had a fever?”
Her throat burned, making it hard to speak. She managed a weak reply: “It’s nothing serious.”
Xu Huaisong motioned for her to sit on the sofa, then turned to rummage through his suitcase. He pulled out an ear thermometer and pressed it to her ear. The display read “38.5°C,” deepening his frown. “I’m taking you to the hospital.”
Ruan Yu shook her head. “The emergency room would be too much trouble…”
All she wanted was water and to collapse back into bed.
Xu Huaisong sighed and made a call—likely to the front desk—asking them to send something up.
While he was still on the phone, Ruan Yu tried to get up to pour water but was stopped by his arm. “Sit back down.”
She slumped back onto the sofa, too exhausted to protest. When he brought a glass of lukewarm water to her lips, she didn’t hesitate before drinking.
After finishing the glass, she heard Xu Huaisong ask, “More?”
She shook her head and curled up on the sofa.
Xu Huaisong fetched a blanket from the bedroom and stepped out briefly to retrieve fever-reducing medicine and cooling patches. But in that short time, he returned to find her already asleep on the sofa.
He helped her sit up, intending to make her take the medicine, but she swayed from inertia and collapsed against his chest.
Her burning cheek pressed against his shirt, igniting a fire within him too.
Xu Huaisong’s heart pounded so loudly he worried the sound might wake her.He took a deep breath, holding the measuring cup filled with medicine in one hand while gently supporting her with the other. For the first time in his life, he called her name directly: "Ruan Yu."
She seemed to hear him, furrowing her brows slightly, but remained half-asleep with her eyes closed.
He had no choice but to bring the cup to her lips and say, "Take your medicine."
Sure enough, she still had some vague awareness—when told to drink, she parted her lips slightly and swallowed.
Xu Huaisong set the cup aside and intended to lay her back down on the sofa, but as if reluctant to let go, he hesitated. Finally, he lowered his head, resting his chin atop her hair, and murmured, "I want to carry you to your room. Is that okay?"
Ruan Yu was asleep, of course, and gave no reply.
His Adam's apple bobbed as he slid one arm under her knees and lifted her into a bridal carry.
The short distance from the living room to the bedroom felt endless, his steps deliberately slow.
Reason told him that taking advantage of someone in this state was dishonorable. Yet another voice in his mind urged him to throw caution to the wind.
Only when he noticed Ruan Yu curling up slightly in his arms, as if cold, did he quicken his pace and lay her down on the bed, tucking the blankets around her.
Glancing down at his wrinkled shirt—where her face had rested—he suddenly felt an inexplicable sense of loss.
Xu Huaisong fetched a cooling patch and pressed it gently to her forehead before sitting down beside the bed.
The emotions he had suppressed all night surged forth without warning.
He could imagine how Li Shican must have liked Ruan Yu.
That guy was like a striker charging fearlessly across the field—no detours, no hesitation—firing one straightforward shot after another, undeterred even if he missed the goal.
But he was different.
He had always stood on the sidelines, calculating every move—when to dribble past defenders, when to tighten the defense—simulating the safest way to break through.
And so, after all this time, he remained rooted in place.
He didn’t dare attempt a shot carelessly, didn’t dare utter those words lightly, because he had only given himself one chance.
If rejected outright, he doubted he’d have the courage to try again.
The truth was, his seemingly methodical and composed exterior masked a deep-seated timidity.
Perhaps Ruan Yu’s readers all speculated about the grand, heartbreaking reason behind the male lead’s absence from that graduation trip—some tragic misunderstanding or unavoidable circumstance.
But in reality, there was no special reason at all.
During the second semester of his first year in high school, his parents’ divorce had turned ugly as they fought over custody of their two children. In the end, they agreed to split them—one parent taking one child.
His father was moving to the U.S. His younger sister had tearfully confided in him that she didn’t want to go with their dad.
So he went instead.
Knowing he was the one who had to leave, how could he possibly say to Ruan Yu, "Even though I’ll be settling in America after graduation, will you be with me?"
Back then, he had no control over his own life. He couldn’t justify influencing a girl’s future just because of his own fleeting feelings.
That graduation trip—he had chosen to skip it himself.
He hated goodbyes, hated the weight of a final, ceremonious farewell. He didn’t want to savor a fleeting moment of sweetness only to spend the rest of his days without her, drowning in endless bitterness.
"If you can’t give me everything, then give me nothing at all."
Just like the lyrics in A-Mei’s song—that was the kind of person Xu Huaisong was.
Throughout all three years of high school, the only time he had ever lost control was during the New Year’s fireworks on his eighteenth birthday.Xu Huaisong gazed quietly at the figure curled up on the bed, unable to resist reaching out toward her cheek.
But his hand was too cold. Even in her sleep, Ruan Yu instinctively recoiled from the touch, turning her head away.
His hand froze mid-air.
After what seemed like an eternity, a sigh-like whisper broke the silence in the room: "Could you... fall for me one more time?"
Author's Note: Yes yes yes! Don't cry Song-Song, mommy's here to comfort you! Don't worry friends, this isn't the start of angst—it's just temporary hardship before the sweet payoff. Song-Song is going to gradually change for the better.
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