"This is an unfinished elixir," Liu Yan covered the teacup with his palm, speaking in a low voice. "You need to think carefully. Maybe you'll live a few more months, maybe just a few days. But if you drink this, you might die immediately." His tone turned eerie as he asked, "Do you want to live hopelessly for a few more days or months, or die right now?" Yu Tuan'er stared at him wide-eyed, seemingly surprised. "What if drinking it doesn't kill me but cures my illness instead? Isn't elixir crafting meant to heal? If you're so confident, how could it fail?" Liu Yan withdrew his hand and turned away. "Then drink it."
Yu Tuan'er held the teacup. "Before I drink this, can you tell me who you're really angry with?" Liu Yan stiffened slightly. "What...?" She kept her gaze fixed on him. "I'm curious. If I die after drinking this, I'll never get to hear the answer." After a long silence, Liu Yan replied impatiently, "I'm not angry." Yu Tuan'er exclaimed, "You're lying! If you're not angry, why haven't you eaten?"
"I'm not angry," Liu Yan said flatly. "I just... suddenly remembered someone." Yu Tuan'er asked curiously, "Who?" Liu Yan answered slowly, "A servant who attended to me." Yu Tuan'er paused, then fell silent as well. After a long while, she asked softly, "Was she your maidservant?" Liu Yan nodded. Yu Tuan'er murmured, "She... must have been..." A pang of bitterness struck her—what kind of woman could Liu Yan remember so vividly? "She must have been prettier than me."
"She was indeed far more beautiful than you," Liu Yan said coldly. "And gentle, obedient, enduring whatever I demanded. If I wanted to slap her, I could. If I wanted her to live or die, she had no choice. Nothing like you, so utterly irritating." Yu Tuan'er countered, "I want to be good to you too, but whenever I try, you get angry." Liu Yan retorted, "She was intelligent, unlike you—empty-headed, foolish, and stubborn." Yu Tuan'er pressed, "Did you ever teach her martial arts?" Liu Yan stiffened. "No!" She beamed. "But you taught me! You've been good to me too." Liu Yan snapped, "She didn’t know martial arts..." Suddenly realizing they'd veered off-topic, he barked, "Drink it!"
Yu Tuan'er lifted the cup but hesitated. Liu Yan sneered. "Scared?" She shook her head. "I was wondering if I'd see my mother after I die." Liu Yan said, "Death is the end. You won’t see anything—stop deluding yourself." With a quiet sigh, Yu Tuan'er drank the liquid. Liu Yan watched her intently, but her expression remained unchanged. She sat on the ground afterward, the two locking eyes. Yet after a long moment, nothing happened.
"Seems this elixir won’t kill you," Liu Yan remarked coldly. "Good." Yu Tuan'er touched her face and body. "I... don’t feel anything." Liu Yan pulled a handkerchief from his sleeve, then retrieved another cup of liquid from beneath the clay jar. Soaking the cloth, he bent down and pressed it against her face.
"Don’t move," he ordered."But...you haven't eaten yet. Will this take long?" She remained motionless, yet her concern lay elsewhere.
He suddenly found it somewhat amusing, somewhat irritating, and somewhat disconcerting. "Just because drinking this won't kill you doesn't mean you'll definitely recover. Worry about yourself."
"Oh." Yu Tuan'er sat quietly as Liu Yan's slender, snow-white fingers—rarely bearing any wrinkles—pressed against her face. From beneath the edge of the handkerchief, she could see his wrist, delicate and elegant, his arm lean and firm. It was an exquisitely beautiful hand. It was a pity she couldn't see what he had looked like before his face was ruined—she wondered if his features had been as striking as his hands. Yet, despite its beauty, his hand carried a pallid gloom, like white porcelain that had been scorched. Gradually, the warmth of his hand seeped into her cheeks. She blinked, but he pressed down on her eyelids, preventing her from opening them. Soon, even her eyelids grew warm. She fantasized about whether she would be dead or alive tomorrow. The warmth of his fingers made her think that Liu Yan was actually a very gentle person... He wasn't truly that bad—he just wanted very badly to be bad. There must be a reason for it.
After the time it took half an incense stick to burn, Liu Yan withdrew the handkerchief. Yu Tuan'er's old-woman face remained unchanged. He stared coldly at her as she still refused to open her eyes. "Dreaming? You're still the same." Yu Tuan'er opened her eyes, got up, and examined herself in the bronze mirror. The reflection still showed an elderly face, but she didn't seem particularly disappointed. Patting her cheeks, she suddenly said, "Actually, I don’t think you’re bad. Not like what Brother Shen said—that you’re some irredeemable villain." Liu Yan wheeled his chair to face the wall and replied coldly, "Get out. Bring your own handkerchief tomorrow morning to press against your face. If the medicine is too bitter, tell Fang Pingzhai to buy you some candy." Yu Tuan'er acknowledged him, then suddenly added, "I want you to buy me candy." Liu Yan paused slightly but didn’t respond. "Get out."
Yu Tuan'er closed the door of the Elixir chamber, her mood greatly improved, a smile blooming on her face. Fang Pingzhai stood at the doorway, pacing, his red fan waving. "Hmm..." She turned back, smiling at him. "Hey, I think he’s in a decent mood now." Fang Pingzhai scratched his head. "Ah... well... never mind. Fang Pingzhai, oh Fang Pingzhai, you who have roamed the world without meeting a worthy opponent—seeking a master isn’t some shameful thing. Why hesitate now? Truly, what a strange state of mind—" With that, he stepped into the Elixir chamber. "Brother Hei, consider this—Fang Pingzhai has lived a life of untrammeled freedom, yet now I’ve toiled for you tirelessly, willingly and without regret. Tell me, when will you teach me the Sound Assassination Technique?"Liu Yan faced the wall, seemingly smiling. Fang Pingzhai had known him for quite some time but had never seen him smile before. Intrigued, he wanted to step around to get a better look. However, Liu Yan was still facing the wall, and given that his face was already a mess of blood and flesh, it would be hard to tell if he was smiling or not. So, with a flick of his red fan behind his back, Fang Pingzhai exclaimed, "Brother Hei—please, in recognition of my heaven-moving devotion to becoming your disciple and my mountain-high, river-long thirst for knowledge, teach me!"
Liu Yan replied in a low voice, "Haha, Sound assassination isn’t something just anyone can learn. You only want to learn it to kill—you’ll never master it that way."
Fang Pingzhai laughed. "Oh? Then for what reason must one learn it to reach your level, Brother Hei?"
Liu Yan answered indifferently, "For no reason at all."
"For no reason?" Fang Pingzhai stepped closer to Liu Yan. "What a fascinating state of mind. Ah, really won’t you let me try? Who knows—I might be a once-in-a-century prodigy!"
Liu Yan turned his wheelchair slowly to face him. "To learn Sound assassination... you must first at least know how to play an instrument. Can you play one?"
"An instrument?" Fang Pingzhai’s eyes darted around. "I can... oh dear, I can’t play anything."
Liu Yan closed his eyes. "Then there’s nothing more to say."
Fang Pingzhai paced a few steps around the Elixir chamber. "But I can sing!"
Liu Yan lifted his eyelids slightly. "Oh? Sing for me."
Fang Pingzhai belted out loudly, "Little copper gong, little wooden drum, little chicks, little ducks, little wooden hut, lotus blooms on water as dusk falls, and behind the hut, there’s even a pig..."
The crude song soared into the sky, shaking leaves off the trees outside. Lin Bu, who was eating at the time, was startled, and Yu Tuan'er let out a cry of surprise, genuinely frightened.
In no time, Fang Pingzhai finished his nonsensical nursery rhyme and pointed with his red fan. "Well?"
Liu Yan replied calmly, "Not bad."
Fang Pingzhai let out a surprised "Hmm," as if even he was taken aback. "You’re not joking?"
"No," Liu Yan said. For the first time, he looked directly into Fang Pingzhai’s eyes, his gaze cool. "Perhaps... you really are a once-in-a-century prodigy."
Fang Pingzhai was dumbstruck. After days of hoping, the sudden realization seemed almost too much for him to accept. "Was my song really that good just now? Ah! I thought only stones would ever listen to me sing—because they have no feet and can’t run away."
"You sang with passion and confidence," Liu Yan said quietly. "Though there are many flaws, they can be corrected... Haha, if I teach you Sound assassination, perhaps one day you can help me kill that person." His eyes suddenly burned with intensity. "In half a year, you must master an instrument. If you fail, don’t blame me for losing patience."
Fang Pingzhai laughed heartily. "Half a year? Your expectations of me are quite high. But I still don’t know which instrument you want me to learn. Let me warn you—I play the zither so badly it makes ghosts weep, the flute so horribly it drives gods to hang themselves, and my pipa playing is so lethal it could kill small animals on the spot.""If the instrument is flawed, the sound will be off. If the sound is off, there can be no music," Liu Yan said indifferently. "Given your circumstances, you could try drumming." Fang Pingzhai staggered back a few steps, clutching his chest. "D...drumming?" Liu Yan closed his eyes. "A drum is also an instrument, and not an easy one to master." Fang Pingzhai turned around, fan in hand. "You want to teach me drumming?" Liu Yan replied calmly, "If you wish to learn, I will teach." Fang Pingzhai hummed in agreement. "Drumming... I've never tried it. Maybe—it really could be fun. I'll learn." Liu Yan flicked his sleeve. "Then first, go find a drum. We begin in a month."
Fang Pingzhai cheerfully stepped out of the Elixir chamber. Lin Bu had already instructed Ru Ma to clear the dishes. Seeing both Yu Tuan'er and Fang Pingzhai brimming with joy, he couldn’t help but think that Brother Hei was truly no ordinary man. Despite his disfigured and crippled body, his lost martial arts, his lack of funds, his absence of fame or property, and his solitary existence—he still had the power to make others feel joy or sorrow for him. When his mood lifted slightly, everyone else brightened as well. It wasn’t just Fang Pingzhai and Yu Tuan'er who reacted this way; even he himself was no exception.
Inside the Elixir crafting chamber.
Liu Yan sat facing the wall. Outside, there was laughter and merriment; inside, only silence.
He stared blankly at the empty wall, his chaotic thoughts momentarily stilled. He wasn’t someone adept at deep contemplation—the more he dwelled on things, the more tangled they became. Yet, not thinking at all was impossible. Back when he was a member of "Copper Flute," he had been a gentleman, meticulous in every small detail, gentle and kind to everyone. He was a media darling, the guitarist with the best public image—but he was never particularly clever or decisive. He was easily influenced by those around him, prone to obsessing over minutiae, and acted mostly on intuition, always believing he wouldn’t get hurt. These flaws were well understood by the members of "Copper Flute," and he knew them himself.
But he couldn’t change.
Just like now, he had agreed to teach Fang Pingzhai Sound assassination, yet he didn’t truly understand what kind of person Fang Pingzhai was. Just like why he had saved Yu Tuan'er—he still couldn’t articulate the real reason. If pressed, the only answer was... he was still a hopeless do-gooder. He couldn’t firmly refuse others. When someone asked something of him, and he could do it but chose to refuse, it felt like a deep-seated guilt.
That was just the kind of person he was. He was the complete opposite of Tang Lici.
Liu Yan exhaled slowly. His Elixir crafting was gradually showing progress, and after agreeing to teach Fang Pingzhai Sound assassination, his mind settled slightly. Gazing blankly at the pure white wall, a thought suddenly surfaced: How... how is she doing?
After he left, they would never let her go. He knew that. But the defeat at Good Cloud Mountain had taken him by surprise. Now, though he worried for her, he no longer had the power to save her. Yet—yet he believed Tang Lici would act. Because A Shui was his woman, because he had adopted her son—so he would surely save her. What he didn’t know was that Tang Lici never saved people for such reasons. That rationale was Liu Yan’s, not Tang Lici’s. Tang Lici saving A Shui was, to a large extent, merely a coincidence.
Still, it must be said that Liu Yan’s intuition was sharp. Though he couldn’t analyze the true reasons, he had foreseen the outcome.After being saved by Tang Lici, she must be very grateful to him—and attracting women has always been Tang Lici's specialty. Liu Yan sat facing the wall, suddenly overcome with anger again. Does she... does she still remember him now? Does her heart only hold Tang Lici's charm, grace, and tender care, while recalling only his own shouts, beatings, manipulation, and control—thus filling her with resentment toward him? Perhaps she even believes that abandoning her at the headquarters, leaving her to be bullied by those women, was entirely his idea, another one of his cruel methods to torment her... and so she hates him even more...
Liu Yan's hands slowly clenched into fists. A Shui...
I... I never meant to torment you on purpose. Tormenting you brought me no joy. Back then, when I took you from Bing Chuanhou's residence and deliberately separated you from your child, it wasn’t because of your innate charm, your peerless elegance, or because you were a beauty rare in a hundred lifetimes. It was because...
Because you were the kind of person I had once strived to be but failed.
He stared blankly at the empty wall. You are gentle and composed, patient and unresentful, kind-hearted toward everyone, yet detached enough to observe from the sidelines. Even when hurt, you handle it so well. Though your strength is slight, I envied you—envied you so much it turned to jealousy. And because I was jealous, I didn’t know what else to do, so I tormented you.
Perhaps if we spent more time together, I could draw more of that calm from you. Perhaps with time, you’d come to see that I... I actually have many hardships of my own.
So please, don’t fall for Tang Lici, all right?