Yun Li looked at him. "Why didn't you come to me directly?"
Even after leaving Nanwu, the deepest part of her heart had clung to unrealistic hope.
If only he had come to her—just that one extra step of affection would have been enough for both of them to let bygones be bygones and continue forward together.
When she was in England, recalling the details of their time together, she would tell herself that Fu Shize had truly loved her. It was just that after the breakup, he no longer needed her, nor was she irreplaceable to him.
And so, a year and a half slipped by.
She would rather it had been as she imagined—she would rather Fu Shize had moved on quickly from their relationship and returned to the normal course of life.
At least that way, Fu Shize would have been better off than he actually was.
"I told you before," Fu Shize straightened slightly in his seat. "I wanted to become my old self again before coming to you."
Back then, he hadn't managed it yet, nor was he certain he ever could.
Fu Shize leaned forward, his hand resting on her hair as he gently touched her temple. "But I didn’t want to rule out the other possibility—that you might come back to me."
After a long silence, Yun Li whispered, "I wish I had gone back to you then."
Guilt weighed on her heart whenever she thought about it. The mere memory of Fu Shize's state at that time made it hard for her to breathe.
She leaned forward too, clasping his fingers. "Doesn’t it hurt you to remember that time?"
Fu Shize answered plainly, "I don’t think about those things." He wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his face against the nape of her neck, breathing in the sweet scent of her shower gel.
Yun Li felt his soft lips press against her skin as he murmured, "All my free time is spent thinking of you."
Yun Li realized that she and Fu Shize often operated on different emotional wavelengths. Whenever their breakup came up, she would drown in sorrow and self-reproach. But Fu Shize—
It seemed like he never dwelled on it at all.
If he did, it might flit through his mind for a moment before he moved on to other thoughts.
So even though she had discovered something she found deeply heartbreaking—sending one-sided messages for a year and a half—to Fu Shize, it didn’t seem to matter much.
It was as if he never kept score of what he had lost.
And precisely because of that, beyond guilt, Yun Li also felt an ache in her chest for him.
She said earnestly, "Do you really understand now? When I first met you in Nanwu and fell for you, I never once thought about who you used to be."
She wanted him to know that from beginning to end, the person she loved was simply the one before her.
"I don’t need you to become any particular version of yourself."
"Mhm." Fu Shize seemed to take it in. He reopened his laptop, and after a long pause, added, "But I want to give you a better life."
When she returned home, Yun Li spotted several empty delivery boxes by the door. Without hesitation, she knocked on Yun Ye’s door. It cracked open slightly, revealing an eye that looked nearly identical to hers.
Before Yun Ye could even identify the visitor, Yun Li pushed the door open forcefully.
Yun Li: "What are you sneaking around for?"
The rough motion made it unnecessary for Yun Ye to figure out who it was. His scalp prickled as he stepped back to let her in.
The room was filled with a sweet fragrance, dried flowers scattered halfway into some shape on the floor. Yun Ye’s phone was open to a confession tutorial on E-Station.
Yun Li: "..."Yun Ye also felt a bit awkward but toughened up and asked her bluntly, "What are you coming in for?"
Yun Li sat on his bed and lay down at a 90-degree angle to it, using her arm to block the light.
Yun Ye nudged her calf with his foot: "If you've got nothing to do, get out."
Yun Li: "I'll stay for a bit. I won't disturb you."
Yun Ye glanced at her and, seeing she wasn't moving, reluctantly said, "Fine."
Yun Ye sat back on the floor, muted his phone, and continued playing the confession tutorial. The phone screen was small, and he had sped up the playback, so he had to focus to read the subtitles.
A minute later, Yun Li rolled over.
She sighed: "Yun Ye, I feel so guilty."
Yun Ye: "..."
Yun Ye: "Can you wait until I'm done..." Before he could finish, seeing Yun Li staring at him gloomily, he fell silent, closed his phone, and sat cross-legged in front of her.
"Go on."
Yun Li recounted the breakup and reconciliation from Fu Shize's perspective to Yun Ye.
After finishing, she sat there, waiting for Yun Ye to speak.
Yun Ye: "Done?"
Yun Li: "Mm."
Yun Ye: "Then get out."
Yun Li: "?"
Yun Ye was utterly baffled. Before, when Yin Yunyi had argued with him, she'd said he was too rational—that when she confided in him, his response was to propose solutions one through N rather than empathize with her.
Yin Yunyi had told him that all he needed to do was listen quietly and suppress his instinct to analyze the problem.
Now, after listening to Yun Li, she was looking at him unhappily.
Caught between two women with such different temperaments, Yun Ye saw no way out: "What do you want me to say?"
Yun Li hesitated: "I don’t think your brother-in-law should have liked me for so long. I don’t seem that great. After finding out he sent me messages for a year and a half, I’ve felt guilty ever since."
Seeing her attitude so self-deprecating, Yun Ye frowned irritably: "Who told you that?" Without thinking, he retorted, "Just compare for yourself—looks, personality, education—what are you lacking in?"
Yun Ye added: "Besides, you’re relatively reasonable around him."
When Yun Li remained silent, Yun Ye continued, "Sis, haven’t you ever thought? There are people in this world like that—once they fall in love, they don’t change easily."
Yun Ye hadn’t interacted much with Fu Shize.
But perhaps because they were both men, he understood him quite well.
In his eyes, Fu Shize was a very straightforward person, whether in handling matters or dealing with people.
Yun Ye said firmly, "I think he’s that kind of person."
"And he’s lucky, isn’t he? He met you, not someone who’d forget all about him after a breakup." Yun Ye mimicked her, lying on the bed with his hands behind his head: "Sis, you’ve already lost him once. Instead of guilt, shouldn’t you be feeling more... grateful now?"
Yun Li didn’t respond. She suddenly got up and returned to her room. Sitting on the bed, she lit the Paper Ball Lamp again.
The guilt was still there, but a new emotion had taken its place—gratitude.
At 11 p.m., Fu Shize had just finished helping Lin Jingran revise an article and unlocked Little Turtle when his phone vibrated.
He opened the message—Yun Li had sent him one: [Aze.]
Unlike Nanwu, West Fuling’s autumn was mild but often windy. Fu Shize’s clothes billowed in the breeze, and he pressed them down.Lin Jingran had already ridden up beside him, his voice nearly drowned out by the roaring wind: "Senior, the wind's really strong. Aren't we leaving yet?"
Fu Shize replied briefly, "Go ahead. I need to reply to a message."
"Senior, you're completely wrapped around her finger. Don't look at your phone while riding, alright?" Lin Jingran teased before riding off first.
His gaze returned to the phone screen, still displaying the same message. Fu Shize sat on Little Turtle, legs propped on the ground, and sent a questioning emoji in reply.
Yun Li: [I'm going to reply to all the messages from that year and a half.]
Yun Li: [One reply per day.]
Fu Shize thought for a moment: [A year and a half's worth of debt. Any interest?]
Yun Li: [What kind of interest do you want?]
Fu Shize lowered his eyes: [Not much.]
He typed slowly: [Two extra words per day.]
After sending it, Yun Li didn’t respond for a long time.
He slipped the phone into his pocket, skillfully backed the scooter out, and rode down a slope. A straight path led to the dormitory building. Fu Shize parked, tucked the keys into his pocket.
His phone vibrated.
He took it out—the screen showed her face, delicate and soft, her bright eyes gazing at the camera, lips slightly curved. Unlocking it, he saw their chat interface, exactly as it was when the screen had last turned off.
Yun Li Li: [Love you.]
...
Yun Li had chosen a game development position at a subsidiary of U Saint Technology. After replying to the HR email, early the next morning, she received a friend request.
[Hello, I’m Zhang Yanxin. HR mentioned you’ve confirmed joining us. The team lead wants to treat the new hires to a meal—would you like to come along if you’re free?]
The other person added Yun Li to a group chat and immediately shared the time and location: today at noon, in a mall near West Science and Technology University.
Yun Li wasn’t keen on going, but being added to the group made it harder to refuse. After some hesitation, she agreed.
She carefully applied light makeup, delivered porridge to Fu Shize, then drove to the mall.
Yun Li arrived early at the private room, where six or seven people were already seated—only two of them women. A few greeted her, and she sat beside the other woman, quietly listening to their conversation.
The scheduled time arrived.
Soon after, a man arrived late and took the seat next to her, politely greeting her.
Yun Li responded. Only as the meal grew lively did she gather from snippets of conversation that the man beside her was the team lead.
His name was Zhou Tiao. He didn’t look old, with a square-jawed face and a composed, steady demeanor.
After a brief self-introduction, he went around the table clockwise, asking both new and existing members to introduce themselves.
Yun Li went first. She stated her name and graduation year, leaving it at that.
The others gave more detailed introductions, covering their interests, hobbies, and personalities. The group’s atmosphere was lively and relaxed.
When it was another guy’s turn—an industrial design graduate from West Science and Technology University—an older colleague joked, "So you’re the team lead’s junior then. Both top-tier students."
Yun Li glanced at Zhou Tiao, who smiled.
By the halfway point, most of the new and existing employees had warmed up.
Yun Li didn’t initiate conversation, but unlike before, she didn’t bury herself in her phone to avoid talking to others.
She sat quietly in the corner, answering questions directed at her one by one.
From the simple exchanges, she could tell her colleagues were decent people.The dinner conversation gradually shifted to why everyone had chosen game development as their career. As the team leader, Zhou Tiao was the first to speak up: "Actually, I studied hardware in college. It was only by chance that I ended up in the gaming industry."
He leaned back slightly in his chair, perhaps uncomfortable from something in his pocket, and pulled out a keychain, placing it on the table.
Right in front of Yun Li, the keychain had a miniature moon-shaped emblem. She stared at it, almost certain it was the insignia of the Unique Team.
Noticing her gaze, Zhou Tiao picked up the keychain. "Actually, it’s related to this. I joined a team during my undergrad years."
The mention of a "team" immediately sparked a round of cheers and praise from the table, everyone marveling at how impressive Zhou Tiao was.
Zhou Tiao waved it off casually. "Those were memorable times, but the ending wasn’t great."
Hearing this, Yun Li stiffened slightly.
He shook the keychain lightly. "At first, we competed in drone racing. Later, we participated in drone design competitions and took first place nationally. Eventually, we even competed internationally."
Lost in memories, Zhou Tiao’s eyes filled with nostalgia. "Back then, our whole team’s dream was to win every trophy out there. Everyone on the team secured grad school admissions through competition awards."
His voice faltered slightly. "But then something happened to one of our teammates. The team captain even took a leave of absence because of it, and the whole team just… fell apart." His tone turned somber. "We were about to graduate by then. During the fall recruitment season, I’d already landed a job at a major drone company. But after what happened, I just couldn’t shake the feeling, so I switched industries during the spring recruitment."
After Zhou Tiao finished speaking, the air grew heavy with silence.
"That captain who took leave… was it because of something he did?" Yun Li suddenly asked.
Zhou Tiao shook his head. "The teammate who passed away and our captain grew up together—like brothers. He probably couldn’t handle the blow."
"Ah, I’ve gone off-topic. Today’s supposed to be a fun gathering, and I’ve brought the mood down. My bad—I’ll punish myself with a drink." Sensing the atmosphere had grown too heavy, Zhou Tiao lightened the mood himself, pouring a glass of red wine and downing it in one go.
Then, after a moment of thought, he turned to Yun Li with a bright smile. "Yun Li, why don’t you tell us why you joined this industry?"
Snapping out of her thoughts, Yun Li briefly mentioned playing VR games during her time at EAW and how, given her background, she had applied for roles in this field.
After everyone else had their turn, she excused herself to the restroom.
The pale, glossy tiles faintly reflected her figure. Yun Li stopped in front of the sink, staring at her own face until it gradually overlapped with Fu Shize’s in her mind.
She had once speculated about the reasons for his leave of absence—maybe the pressure of his Ph.D., academic burnout, an unethical advisor. She had even wondered if someone as good-looking as him had been bullied.
In the end, he had returned, so she hadn’t pressed further.
Putting herself in his shoes, if she had taken a leave of absence, she wouldn’t have wanted others to know about it either.
It had never crossed her mind that the childhood friend he’d mentioned—the one who had passed away—was connected to his leave of absence.
Washing her hands, Yun Li absentmindedly dried them with a paper towel. She quickened her pace back to the private room, only to find the dinner already over, her colleagues leaving in groups.
She glanced at Zhou Tiao’s seat—he was already gone.
Walking slowly back to her car, she opened the group chat from the dinner.
It hadn’t been appropriate to ask at the table, so Yun Li decided to privately message Zhou Tiao to inquire about what had happened back then.Unable to find a WeChat account with the note "Zhou Tiao" in the group chat, Yun Li could only send a message to Zhang Yanxin, who had contacted her the day before.
["Hello, may I ask for Group Leader Zhou's WeChat contact?"]
She waited in the car for a while, but there was no reply.
Yun Li drove back home.
After waiting at home for a long time, Zhang Yanxin still hadn't responded. Yun Li called her, but the call went unanswered.
She wondered if she had somehow offended the other person today.
Yun Li called Fu Zhengchu: "Fu Zhengchu, I want to ask you something."
Hearing her serious tone, Fu Zhengchu grew a little nervous: "What's wrong, Lili-jie?"
"Your uncle had a childhood friend who passed away. Do you know the reason?" Yun Li hesitated. "I don’t want to ask your uncle directly."
She was afraid bringing up the topic might trigger or hurt him.
Fu Zhengchu: "My parents told me before that it was an accident, but they didn’t give me details. They also told me not to mention it in front of my uncle."
Yun Li felt momentarily lost: "Then do you know how your uncle was at the time..."
She didn’t continue, unsure if Fu Zhengchu knew about Fu Shize’s leave of absence from school.
When she fell silent, Fu Zhengchu guessed her question and answered proactively: "My uncle wasn’t in a good state before. Lili-jie, you saw how he barely spoke back then. He stayed in Nanwu for a long time."
After a pause, he added: "But my uncle is fine now. That was a long time ago, so don’t worry too much, Lili-jie."
"Okay." After chatting a bit more with Fu Zhengchu, Yun Li hung up.
She wasn’t sure if she was being overly suspicious.
Fu Shize had been almost completely open with Yun Li, except when it came to that childhood friend—he avoided the topic entirely.
After all, memories could be painful too.
Now, recalling his deliberately light tone and forced smiles, Yun Li sensed the hurt beneath them.
He had been deeply wounded, unwilling to revisit that past.
She searched online for awards won by the Unique Team and found a news article listing all the team members.
Fu Shize (Captain), Jiang Yuan, Zhou Tiao...
Searching for Jiang Yuan and West Fuling University of Science and Technology yielded no further information.
Leaning over her computer, Yun Li had originally agreed not to meet Fu Shize today, but she still grabbed her keys and left.
Seeing his tall figure approach, his expression relaxed and at ease.
Once in the passenger seat, Fu Shize noticed her preoccupation and tilted his head slightly. "What’s wrong?"
"Nothing." Yun Li didn’t mention the day’s events. Fu Shize glanced at her tightly gripped steering wheel and asked after a moment, "Did lunch not go well today?"
He would find out eventually, so Yun Li feigned calm and mentioned: "No, the leader of my group seems to be your classmate. He had a Unique badge on his keychain."
Fu Shize’s gaze steadied. After a pause, he asked, "What’s his name?"
Yun Li: "Zhou Tiao."
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