Li Rоng rеmеmbеrеd Pei Wеnхuаn’s уоuthful awkwardness.
Тhоugh many уears hаd раssеd, shе still rеcallеd the cautious, flustered lооk on his fаcе during thеir first kiss.
Аt first, it wаs just a light brush оf liрs аgаinst liрs—soft, but nоthing more. It laсkеd the mуstique of the rumоrs.
Later, it bеcamе rесklеss аnd сlumsу, tinged with desirе, but Li Rоng nevеr fоund muсh joу in it. As а nеwlywed соuplе, they simplу went through the mоtiоns.
Yеt her рerfunctorу rеsрonsе did nоt еsсарe Реi Wenхuan’s nоtice. Еver thе diligеnt studеnt, he hаd аlrеаdy learnеd to style her hair аnd paint her brоws; this, too, hе toоk sеriouslу. Night after night, he would try different approaches, earnestly asking, “What does Your Highness think?”
It was almost laughable, but his humble persistence eventually bore fruit.
He could paint over a dozen styles of makeup for Li Rong.
And with a single kiss, he could bring her the utmost pleasure.
Su Rongqing had kissed her too, in those long, intimate moments, fulfilling the duties of a companion.
But his kisses were always restrained and controlled, much like the man himself and his feelings. They kept one lucid, evoking only the most basic of human sensations.
The delight Pei Wenxuan offered, however, went beyond mere desire—it was an added gift, one that could unravel even the strongest will into tender, lingering thoughts.
When his lips met hers, Li Rong was at first stunned, but within moments, her senses dissolved. Decades of pent-up joy seemed to explode in her mind, leaving her too weak to push him away.
Only when Pei Wenxuan’s mouth trailed down her neck, teeth tugging at the knot of her robe, hands loosening her belt, did Li Rong regain some clarity. She seized his hand.
Both were breathing heavily. After a pause, Pei Wenxuan slowly lifted his head.
A smile played on his lips, eyes gleaming with triumph, barely concealing the passion beneath.
“You…” Li Rong’s voice was hoarse. “What are you doing?”
Li Rong was no fool. Even in her dazed state, she refused to believe Pei Wenxuan intended to “be friends.”
What kind of friends acted like this?
Kissing and holding hands was one thing, but this? Did he take her for an idiot?!
What angered her more was that she had known his intentions were improper—and yet she had yielded.
She hadn’t pushed him away immediately. She had yielded.
Furious at herself and at Pei Wenxuan, she glared at him.
Pei Wenxuan saw the wariness in her eyes—as if she feared he might kiss her again. The sight of her so guarded, and the reason behind it, made him chuckle softly.
“What are you laughing at?”
Li Rong shoved him, and Pei Wenxuan fell back onto the bed, still laughing. She grabbed a nearby soft pillow and hurled it at him. He covered his head, letting her strike him.
She knew he was laughing at her loss of composure—how a mere kiss had made her forget herself. The more she thought about it, the angrier she grew—at herself, at him. She tossed the pillow aside and began hitting him. After a few blows, Pei Wenxuan caught one of her hands. Half-propped up, he brought it to his lips, blew gently on it, then looked up at her with a smile.
“Don’t hurt your hand.”"Pei Wenxuan!"
Li Rong's voice was sharp: "How dare you!"
"Does Your Highness not like it?" Pei Wenxuan reclined on the bed, propping his head up, smiling as he looked at Li Rong. "I thought Your Highness would be pleased just now."
Li Rong sneered at his words: "Censor Pei is quite skilled at serving others. How could I not enjoy it?"
"That's good then." Pei Wenxuan smiled as he gazed at Li Rong. "If Your Highness ever wishes for this humble official to serve you, I am always at your disposal."
Li Rong remained silent. She stared at Pei Wenxuan, seeing his relaxed demeanor. After a long while, she finally gritted her teeth and spoke: "What madness has taken you?"
"This humble official has heard that Minister Su previously sought Your Highness's hand in marriage."
Pei Wenxuan held Li Rong's hand, idly stroking it, his gaze fixed on where they touched as he spoke slowly: "I was merely reminding Your Highness, fearing you might be swayed by Vice Minister Su's handsome appearance."
"Reminding me?" Li Rong sneered. "What kind of reminder is this?"
"Your Highness, if you merely lack someone by your side, Wenxuan is here." Pei Wenxuan lifted his eyes, his gaze settling on Li Rong as he spoke softly. "This humble official has said before, whatever Your Highness desires, I can provide."
As he spoke, Pei Wenxuan couldn't help but smile and repeat Li Rong's earlier words: "Including kissing you."
Li Rong said nothing, her eyes fixed on Pei Wenxuan's.
Pei Wenxuan shifted his gaze away, speaking slowly: "I know Minister Su is special to Your Highness. His willingness to propose marriage must be quite an impact for you. After all, across two lifetimes," Pei Wenxuan's voice grew somewhat low, "never having properly married him must be a regret in Your Highness's heart."
"Your Highness admired him since youth—'When Rongqing wears white, no immortal in this world compares.' Later, spending a lifetime together, yet hindered by my presence without proper status. Being able to bow to heaven and earth, sovereign and ancestors with Su Rongqing would fulfill Your Highness's long-cherished wish. But Your Highness, now is no longer the appropriate time."
Pei Wenxuan brushed aside the sleeve trapped beneath him, appearing casual: "If it were earlier, when you had no conflicts of interest with the Su family, your union would have been a good match. But now you wish to establish the Supervisory Department, to seize power from the aristocratic families into your own hands. If he is willing to stand by Your Highness's side, then your relationship would be tainted by power—this is not the Su Rongqing Your Highness desires. If he is unwilling to stand by your side, then your marriage ties would be severed. Even more frightening, if he seeks to use Your Highness's affection to pursue his own interests, as in the previous lifetime," Pei Wenxuan's tone turned cold as he looked up at Li Rong, "what would Your Highness do then?"
Li Rong remained silent, watching Pei Wenxuan speak these words with apparent nonchalance. Seeing her lack of response, Pei Wenxuan thought his words had struck a chord. Shifting his gaze, he changed his tone: "If Your Highness must choose someone, rather than Su Rongqing, you might as well choose me."
"Choose you?" Li Rong's voice carried mockery.
"Is it not good?" Pei Wenxuan turned to look at Li Rong, speaking plainly. "In terms of family background, though the Su family is an aristocratic clan, the Pei family is also a prominent lineage. What the Su family can offer Your Highness, the Pei family may not give less. Moreover, now that His Majesty establishes the Supervisory Department to oppose the aristocratic families, the Pei family will fully align with you, much easier to control than the Su family."
"And as for personal qualities," Pei Wenxuan raised an eyebrow, "in what way does this humble official fall short compared to him?"
"You're tedious."Seeing Pei Wenxuan start to talk nonsense, Li Rong couldn't be bothered to continue the conversation with him. She turned over and lay down, her back facing Pei Wenxuan as she said, "Go to sleep."
"Don't sleep," Pei Wenxuan, dissatisfied that Li Rong wasn't responding to this matter, reached out to pull her, wanting to turn her over as he pressed, "In what way am I inferior to him? Tell me!"
Li Rong lay with her back to him, refusing to speak, covering her ears and ignoring him. Pei Wenxuan grew annoyed, gritting his teeth as he said, "In the six arts of a gentleman, I ranked first every year—I'm no worse than him. As for looks, I don't lose to him either. And as for temperament, is he better to you than I am? He couldn't even ask for your hand in marriage, so what are you still thinking about him for?"
"I'm not listening, I'm not listening," Li Rong could tell he was angry, which made her somewhat pleased. "Turtle chanting sutras."
"Li Rong, explain clearly," Pei Wenxuan turned her over, irritated. "How am I inferior to him?"
"Then tell me," Li Rong suppressed a smile, pretending to be serious. "You're only about the same as him in every way, and he's from a prestigious noble family. So how exactly are you better than him?"
This question momentarily stunned Pei Wenxuan. Li Rong sighed. "Can't answer, can you? If you can't answer, then don't disturb me. I'm going to sleep."
After saying this, Li Rong lay back down. Pei Wenxuan sat behind her for a while. Li Rong thought about it and worried she might have gone too far, preparing to comfort him. Before she could speak, she heard Pei Wenxuan say, "But I dared to marry you."
"What kind of nonsense is that?"
Li Rong sat up, displeased. "Is marrying me some kind of disadvantageous thing?"
"I dared to risk my life to marry you," Pei Wenxuan looked up at her seriously. "Would he dare?"
Hearing this, Li Rong was suddenly stunned. Pei Wenxuan gazed at her quietly. "Li Rong, you were someone I fought to bring back."
It was when he was still alone, risking his life to overthrow the Yang family and stir up the court, that he managed to marry Her Highness.
"But he wouldn't dare."
Even though he held a noble status and wielded power, he wouldn't dare.
Listening to these words and looking at the young man before her, he was like a solitary blade, walking his own path from past to present, always alone.
Actually, she knew.
She had always known that this man, who had climbed his way up, possessed a courage and ambition rarely found among the scions of noble families, yet only with her did he retain a touch of youthful innocence.
"So," Li Rong no longer joked, smiling bitterly. "I married you."
"Pei Wenxuan, do you know," Li Rong reached out, took his hand, and held it in hers. "Actually, you're good in every way, except for one thing."
"In your heart, you always feel you're not good enough."
"When you praise yourself, you always have to bring up some achievement—you ranked first in the six arts, you're good at everything, you've held such high positions, you write such beautiful calligraphy, you're so talented, and even," Li Rong looked up, a half-smile on her lips. "You're so skilled."
Hearing Li Rong's words, Pei Wenxuan's face suddenly grew hot. He feigned composure. "One can't just speak without basis. If I say I'm good, of course I need reasons."
"But I don't think you need them."
Li Rong spoke directly. "Just being Pei Wenxuan is enough."
Pei Wenxuan stiffened slightly. Li Rong continued, "You once told me that your mother always compared you to your father and to others. But now I'm telling you, you don't need to compare yourself to anyone, let alone to Su Rongqing.""You're afraid Su Rongqing will propose to me and I'll be swayed. I know what you're worried about, so rest assured," Li Rong said calmly. "I won't ruin my future prospects for a man."
Pei Wenxuan: "..."
"That's not what I meant either..."
It wasn't that ruining one's future for a man was unacceptable—it was just that the man in question had to be him.
This answer flashed through Pei Wenxuan's mind, but he couldn't voice it outright. Struggling to speak, he carefully weighed his words, wondering how to begin.
Li Rong looked up at him, her eyes clear and perceptive. She seemed to understand everything, yet she didn't mention it.
Pei Wenxuan fell silent, unsure whether he should speak up or break through this unspoken barrier.
He was afraid that if he laid it all out, she would push him away, and they wouldn't even be able to remain friends.
But if he didn't speak, he feared she would never understand.
After a moment, his gaze briefly flickered to Li Rong's lips. Then he smiled and said, "I know Your Highness can distinguish clearly. I was just worrying too much."
"Your Highness has other matters to attend to tomorrow," Pei Wenxuan lay down. "Let's sleep."
Li Rong, having dealt with him all night, was also tired. She lay down, and before long, she felt someone press against her from behind.
Pei Wenxuan embraced her from behind. She tensed up, always on guard for his next move.
"Your Highness," Pei Wenxuan sensed her tension and chuckled, whispering in her ear, "We have plenty of time ahead of us."
Li Rong remained silent.
She had figured it out—this old fox Pei Wenxuan was probably really going to make a move on her.
Tch.
Li Rong cursed inwardly, Beast.
Author's Note: [Mini Theater]
Author: Please describe yourselves with a line from a song.
Shangguan Yue & Li Ming: Looking back, walking with you, never once feeling happiness. Too much hatred, no results, bringing up the past is torture~
Li Rong & Pei Wenxuan: Come a little closer, and I'll let you hold my hand. Be a little braver, and I'll follow you~
Su Rongqing & Li Rong: And you held an umbrella, embracing me in your arms, each word of your vow so solemn... If this life is a mistake in meeting, I beg for a peaceful end.
Shangguan Ya & Su Ronghua: ...
Author: Why aren't you singing?
Su Ronghua: Darling, fly slowly, be careful of the thorny roses ahead~
Shangguan Ya: I'd like to request his microphone be muted, thank you.
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