Li Rоng listеnеd to Pеi Wеnхuаn's wоrds, her gaze rеsting quiеtly upоn him.
Her mind wаs mоmеntаrilу in disаrray. Shе understood what Pei Wеnхuan sаid, yеt thеrе wеre раrts shе did nоt fullу grasр.
That Pеi Wеnxuаn had oncе liked her—this shе had long knоwn.
Вut Реi Wеnхuаn claiming hе did nоt like Qin Zhеnzhеn—this wаs somеwhat unехpeсtеd.
She рondered fоr a long while, аwаrе that hеr emotions wеrе tоo turbulеnt nоw tо mаkе аny dесisions. Тoо many fеelings сhurnеd within hеr, so shе suррrеssed them all аnd simply said, "I will considеr what you'vе said. Let's gеt in the саrriagе and head back first."
With that, she instructed those nearby, "Attendants, let's return."
Pei Wenxuan remained silent, standing by the carriage. Li Rong lowered the curtain and closed her eyes to rest briefly.
The surrounding attendants hurried back. The coachman, seeing Pei Wenxuan standing motionless to the side, hesitated and asked, "Imperial Son-in-Law, aren't you getting in?"
Pei Wenxuan lowered his head, standing by the carriage. He did not wish to see Li Rong again.
He felt Li Rong was like a piece of ice that could never be warmed, a stone that could never be worn through. No matter how hard he tried, that person would never respond in the slightest.
He felt weary, standing in place for a long time until finally, Li Rong's voice came from inside the carriage: "Aren't we leaving yet?"
Pei Wenxuan momentarily lost the strength to argue. He lifted the curtain and entered the carriage.
Inside, Li Rong sat on one side, Pei Wenxuan on the other. The two sat quietly, neither speaking.
Li Rong closed her eyes, calming her emotions.
After a long while, having fully digested Pei Wenxuan's words, she slowly opened her eyes and looked at him.
"I've thought over what you said earlier. Regarding the past matters, I was presumptuous."
Pei Wenxuan remained silent. Li Rong continued calmly, "The matter between you and Qin Zhenzhen—I actually don't know the details. Back then, I only knew you had feelings for her. Later, when your affections shifted to me, you felt tormented. Since you were suffering, I didn't want a love divided in two, so I chose to leave. I thought that after I left, you could focus your heart entirely on her."
Pei Wenxuan kept his head lowered, listening as Li Rong explained, "Later, she passed away early. I've always known that the living cannot compete with the dead. I thought that after her death, you would inevitably feel regret. After all, you shared many years of affection with her, while our time together, from beginning to end, was only a year."
Li Rong's tone was even, carrying her unique gentleness. Yet this calm, gentle, and utterly emotionless tone pierced straight into Pei Wenxuan's heart.
He understood clearly that when someone could speak of the past with such composure, there was only one reason: she had let go of the past.
But when he realized she had let go, an indescribable bitterness welled up within him.
Seeing him lower his head in silence, Li Rong could not discern his emotions. She only felt that Pei Wenxuan was different from his usual self at this moment, so she mustered rare patience and said slowly, "You and she should have been a match made in heaven, a good fate. It was only because of my marriage arrangement that disrupted your plans. Otherwise, with your talents, even though she broke off the engagement back then, if you had wanted to fight for it, you could have won her back quickly. In this life, starting over, we can now be considered friends. You've been thinking on my behalf, and I also wish to treat you well, which is why I've done a bit more."With that, Li Rong laughed, "Besides, didn't you also think about matchmaking me with Su Rongqing? We're even now, so don't be so petty."
Pei Wenxuan remained silent, his chest tight and suffocating.
He felt he had countless things to say, words that had accumulated over many years but had never been spoken. Now that he had suddenly started, they overflowed, all crowding between his lips and teeth.
Li Rong thought for a moment, then crouched down in front of him, looking up at him. "Is it really that upsetting?"
"Li Rong," Pei Wenxuan said hoarsely, "after we got together, I never spoke to Qin Zhenzhen in private."
Li Rong hadn't expected Pei Wenxuan to bring this up. She felt awkward for a moment and wanted to say that there was no point in talking about it, but seeing his expression, she felt he really needed to say it.
So she crouched before him without stopping him, only softly responding, "Oh..."
"She married Li Chuan. Logically, I shouldn't have interfered, but at that time, she was having a hard time, and her brother wasn't around, so I helped her a few times. I didn't do anything else."
"Um... I understand."
As Li Rong listened to Pei Wenxuan speak so earnestly, for some reason, she gradually felt like laughing.
But she didn't dare provoke him, so she only said, "I had someone investigate later. I know everything. After all, she was still my younger brother's concubine. If there had really been something between you, I wouldn't have tolerated it for so long."
"When you asked me back then if I liked her, I really didn't know. Later, when I did know, you always argued with me. Every time I wanted to make up with you," Pei Wenxuan said, his tone growing aggrieved, "you would say things to hurt me. Your words were too painful!"
"Then I'm sorry," Li Rong couldn't hold back and laughed. "It's been so many years. How do you still remember it so clearly?"
"Later, you liked Su Rongqing. I knew," Pei Wenxuan raised his head, looking at her with a difficult smile. "You liked him, so you should be together. After all, the fault lies with me. I deserve it."
Li Rong looked at Pei Wenxuan, unable to find words of comfort. She knew he was truly upset now. After all, in their previous life, he had spent his life alone, and it was indeed pitiful.
Seeing her at a loss, Pei Wenxuan couldn't help but smile. He raised his hand and gently touched her face, saying hoarsely, "Li Rong." He gazed at her quietly. "Look, I missed you for an entire lifetime."
Li Rong didn't speak, letting him look at her. After a long while, she finally said, "Feeling better now?"
Pei Wenxuan nodded. Li Rong pushed herself up, and Pei Wenxuan helped her. She stood up and returned to her seat, leaning back. After thinking for a moment, she smiled and looked at Pei Wenxuan. "How long have you wanted to say these things?"
"For many years," Pei Wenxuan chuckled softly.
Li Rong lowered her gaze and remained silent. After a while, she said gently, "Although it's a bit late, I'm still glad to hear these words."
"Although it's late," Pei Wenxuan continued her thought, "I'm also glad I could say them."
After speaking, they both paused. A moment later, Li Rong laughed and looked up at Pei Wenxuan. Hearing her laughter, Pei Wenxuan couldn't help but smile as well.
"Knowing you liked me so much back then," Li Rong said with a smile, "though it's a bit regrettable, I'm still happy."
"What's regrettable about it?""If it had been earlier," Li Rong pondered, imagining if Pei Wenxuan had said these words back then, she spoke with some uncertainty, "perhaps I wouldn’t have left at the time?"
"But if it had been earlier," Pei Wenxuan reflected, "I wouldn’t have said these things either."
All of a person’s thoughts, their ability to express them, and the courage they accumulate do not come out of thin air.
"That’s true." Li Rong nodded, lightly tapping her small fan against her palm as she looked up at him. "The current Lord Pei is still quite different."
Pei Wenxuan saw the teasing glint hidden in her half-smiling eyes and slowly calmed down. As the earlier agitation faded, he began to feel somewhat awkward.
Seeing that he seemed to be gradually realizing what he had just said, Li Rong couldn’t help but laugh. "Lord Pei, after saying so much to me just now, were you talking about the past, or were you hinting at the future?"
If it was about the past, then it was merely an apology.
If it was about the future, then it was a confession.
Understanding Li Rong’s implication, Pei Wenxuan instinctively tensed up and said, "I was just apologizing."
Li Rong had already guessed his response and laughed out loud. "You got so worked up just to apologize?"
"I was upset," Pei Wenxuan sighed. "You’ve misunderstood me too many times before. It was like this in our past life too—you always dragged Qin Zhenzhen into everything. And this time, you took matters into your own hands again, treating me like a ball to be kicked away. I just don’t understand—what did I ever do to make you so eager to push me away?"
"That’s the question I should be asking you," Li Rong immediately retorted. "Wasn’t it you who first tried to matchmake Su Rongqing and me? On our wedding night, you talked about it for half the night, insisting I agree even when I refused. Tell me, who’s being unreasonable—me or you?"
Pei Wenxuan was momentarily left speechless by Li Rong’s words. After holding back for a long while, he finally said, "But I didn’t say anything inappropriate to Su Rongqing, did I?"
"Are you feeling sorry for Qin Zhenzhen?" Li Rong blinked. "Why are you so anxious when I talk to her?"
"Li Rong," Pei Wenxuan said, torn between laughter and tears, "can’t you be reasonable? Whatever we discuss between us is an internal matter. But if you bring outsiders into it, that means you’re determined to send me away. Can’t I even be upset about that?"
"Weren’t you determined to send me away too?" Li Rong asked, puzzled. Pei Wenxuan fell silent, and Li Rong looked at him curiously. "Cat got your tongue?"
"No... it’s different."
Pei Wenxuan finally spoke. "I wanted to match you with Su Rongqing because I thought it would be better for you. But you wanted to match me with Qin Zhenzhen because you wanted to resolve the Crown Prince’s concerns."
"People always have some feelings," Pei Wenxuan said softly. "Even though we weren’t meant to be, after all these years, if not as family, then at least as friends. If a friend uses you like that, it’s bound to hurt a little."
Li Rong listened quietly, then looked up at him earnestly. "It wasn’t entirely about using you. It’s just that this outcome is better for everyone."
"Pei Wenxuan," she said, her eyes filled with sincerity as she looked at him, "I may not always consider everything, but my regard for you as a friend is genuine. If you don’t betray me, I won’t betray you."
Pei Wenxuan looked into Li Rong’s eyes—they were frank and bright.
Li Rong, who lived in the depths of the palace, somehow carried a warmth and brightness that didn’t belong there.Yet she always carefully concealed that brilliance, so when it occasionally shone through, it could suddenly shatter another's heart.
Pei Wenxuan watched her quietly for a long while before he smiled and said, "Don't say things like that."
"Why not?" Li Rong found it strange.
"You're too beautiful," Pei Wenxuan sighed. "I've been single for too long, and if you say such things, I'm afraid I might fall for you."
Hearing this, Li Rong couldn't help but cover half her face with her fan and chuckle softly.
However, after speaking, Pei Wenxuan seemed unwilling to let her feel too smug, adding, "After all, nowadays even a female cat looks charming to me."