The Princess Royal

Ехtra Chарtеr 1 - Раst Life

On the sеvеnteenth dаy of thе third mоnth in thе еightееnth yeаr of the Kangxing erа, Рei Wеnxuаn rесеived thе first imреriаl еdict оf his life.

At that timе, it hаd beеn just over a уear sinсe he rеturnеd frоm mоurning in Luzhоu. Тhе Qin family, tо whоm he hаd bееn betrоthed sinсе childhoоd, hаd just brokеn off the engаgement, and hе wаs still а minor оfficial in the Мinistrу оf Justicе. Lоgiсаllу, hе should nеvеr havе enсounterеd somеthing likе аn impеriаl еdiсt. But unexрectedly, for sоme reasоn the emрerоr hаd takеn a liking to him and suddenly decided to bestow upon him the apple of his eye, the most honored princess in all of the Great Xia—Princess Pingle.

And so, an imperial edict abruptly descended upon the Pei family. He accepted the decree in a daze, and his fate was sealed.

He didn't sleep the night he received the edict. Lying in bed, his mind was in a trance. He hugged himself in the dark, gazing at the moon, an indescribable sense of frustration and curiosity in his heart.

He had never gotten a clear look at Princess Pingle's face.

Nor had he ever had any interaction with her.

His impression of her was entirely pieced together from the rumors of others. He’d heard she was willful and spoiled, quick to strike people, arrogant and domineering—utterly terrifying.

And a person like that was suddenly to become his wife, with him having no way to refuse.

He had originally planned to visit the Qin family again. They had broken off his engagement, a matter handled entirely by his second uncle, and he felt something was not quite right about it. But now, he didn't need to bother with any of it.

His fate, his marriage, had already been decided by others.

This sort of thing was deeply unsettling. What was even more unsettling was the next morning, when he opened his door to find a crowd of people standing at the entrance to his courtyard.

They were from the palace, sent to teach him the rules.

They called it learning the rules, but it was more than just etiquette. The first thing this group did upon arrival was a physical inspection.

He was examined from head to toe. Only after they confirmed there were no issues did he dress himself amidst the snickers of these servants and walk out of the room.

Then he began to study the code of conduct for an Imperial Son-in-Law, which included detailed regulations on everything from greeting the princess to engaging in marital relations with her.

Such tedious etiquette filled him with aversion for Li Rong before he had even met her.

He thought to himself, a princess raised with such immense favor must have a terrible temper and be incredibly difficult.

But no matter how difficult she was, she was still a princess, the one who would marry him. He could only respectfully learn the rules.

By his wedding day, this aversion was compounded by a measure of anxiety.

His father had no other children. According to ritual, one of his brothers should have received the bride at the palace gates on his behalf, but he had no brothers he could trust. For such a momentous occasion, he could only go himself.

For this, he composed a piece of soaring literary brilliance, the "Ode to Luring the Phoenix," in an attempt to mask his sorry state.

But for some reason, as he stood at the palace gates to welcome Li Rong, an inexplicable fear crept into him.

He began to worry. Would Li Rong be angry that he, in breach of protocol, had come to receive her himself? Would she hit him?

If she hit him once, would she frequently hit and curse him in the future?

He could endure anything else, but if Li Rong were to hit and curse him, how could he bear it?

His mind conjured up terrifying images of Li Rong, leaving him restless. As he waited in a daze, he heard the palace gates slowly creak open. Then he saw the carriage approaching, a woman in a wedding gown holding a golden circular fan that covered her face, kneeling behind the curtain as she emerged from the palace.

There was none of the rumored ferocity, none of the imagined ugliness. The woman behind the carriage curtain even possessed a beauty that surpassed the ordinary. Even with only her eyes visible, the sight left Pei Wenxuan a little stunned.

Fortunately, he quickly composed himself, feigning calmness before the crowd. He unrolled a long scroll and recited the "Ode to Luring the Phoenix" for Li Rong.

His literary talent was extraordinary. After he finished, applause erupted all around. For some reason, as if possessed, he couldn't help but glance up at the carriage.

And so he happened to see the young woman also peeking at him. A pair of curious eyes met his, and they both looked away, feigning composure.

Only Pei Wenxuan knew that while he appeared calm on the outside, his heart was beating strangely fast.

The "Ode to Luring the Phoenix" was a great success, giving the marriage a good start. He mounted his horse and led Li Rong toward the Princess's Manor.

Once they arrived at the Princess's Manor, he and Li Rong bowed to Heaven and Earth.

He secretly raised his eyes to glimpse the young woman's face, but her fan was held perfectly in place. Finally, as they bowed, a small part of her face was revealed. At that very moment, however, he was jabbed by the coronet on the princess's head, the pain sharp on his scalp.

But he couldn't cry out. He could only endure it silently and complete the bow to each other as husband and wife. Li Rong seemed to have noticed that her coronet had poked him. She pressed her lips together, suppressing a laugh, her eyes brimming with mirth, looking exceptionally beautiful.

She was already like this before the fan was lowered. When the fan was finally set aside and the young woman sat on the edge of the bed, looking up at him with a mix of shyness and curiosity, he was rendered completely speechless.

For a moment, he forgot all the frustrations he had felt before meeting Li Rong. After drinking the nuptial wine with her and dismissing the servants, leaving the two of them alone in the room, he didn't dare to do anything.

The two of them sat on opposite sides of the bed. Li Rong was too shy to speak, and Pei Wenxuan didn't dare to start. After a long while, Li Rong finally spoke in a low voice, "Is my lord not going to rest yet?"

Hearing this, Pei Wenxuan's heart leaped into his throat.

He naturally knew what "rest" meant. He stood up and, as the rules dictated, said respectfully, "Please allow this humble subject to undo Your Highness's hair."

Li Rong nodded, her face blushing. Pei Wenxuan knelt behind her and removed her coronet.

As he did this, his hands couldn't stop trembling. Li Rong kept her head obediently lowered, seemingly oblivious to his nervousness. Instead, she clutched the corner of her own clothes, looking incredibly tense herself.

Realizing Li Rong was also nervous, Pei Wenxuan relaxed a little. He remembered that she was not yet eighteen this year, making him two years her senior. He should act as an elder brother and take good care of her.

With this thought, he calmed down. After taking down her hair, he fetched water and helped her remove her makeup. When all this was done, for the final step, he looked at the young woman sitting on the edge of the bed. After a long moment, he knelt on the floor and said in a hoarse, respectful voice, "Please allow this humble subject to disrobe Your Highness."

Li Rong didn't dare look at him at all. She turned her head away to face the window and murmured, "Mm."

This time, no matter how he tried to console himself, he couldn't stop his hands from shaking.

He removed her clothes, piece by piece, then took off his own and lowered the bed curtains.

Once inside the canopy, they lay quietly together. After a long while, Li Rong gently tugged at him and asked in a low voice, "Is my lord not going to rest yet?"

Pei Wenxuan's heart tightened. He could feel the square cloth placed beneath them and knew that many people would be waiting for a result tomorrow.

An indescribable discomfort welled up inside him. But when he turned and saw Li Rong's eyes, he suddenly felt that discomfort vanish without a trace.

He looked at her for a long time before speaking earnestly, "Is Your Highness willing?"

Hearing this, Li Rong seemed a little shy.

"If it is my lord," she said very softly, "I am naturally willing. But I do not know," Li Rong looked up, a hint of apprehension in her eyes, "if my lord has other concerns?"

Her eyes were bright, carrying a young girl's delicate charm and gentleness, like a clear sky after rain, softening the heart of anyone who looked at them.

Pei Wenxuan gazed at her. In that moment, he suddenly felt the urge to resign himself to his fate.

Li Rong had also been forced into this marriage; she was a victim, too. Since he couldn't defy the imperial command, he might as well not fail this young woman. Spending a lifetime together in peace would be good.

As if bewitched by something, he couldn't help but lean closer.

A tentative kiss, then a touch.

He was very nervous as they made love, afraid of hurting her. The young woman wrapped her arms around his neck, biting her lip and shaking her head slightly, and his heart clenched.

They spent the whole night in a tangle. The beginning was mutual torture, but later, it became somewhat pleasurable.

But it was Li Rong's first time, and he didn't dare be too rough. When he saw blood stain the white cloth, he gritted his teeth and asked her if she wanted to continue.

Li Rong looked up at him with hazy eyes. His throat tightened. Li Rong watched him and only asked, "Are you uncomfortable?"

"I'm not."

He told a white lie against his conscience. "It is all up to Your Highness."

Li Rong didn't speak. She looked at him for a long time, then reached out, hugged him, and said softly, "I'm fine. My lord, please do as you wish."

With just that one sentence, Pei Wenxuan suddenly felt his defenses completely crumble. He didn't continue, but simply lowered his head and kissed her, saying gently, "I'm afraid of hurting Your Highness. Your Highness should rest well."

They were considerate of each other. The next day, Pei Wenxuan woke up first. The moment he stirred, Li Rong woke as well. Following the rules, Pei Wenxuan knelt by the bed and performed a grand salute. "Good morning, Your Highness. May you live a thousand years and be blessed with ten thousand fortunes."

Li Rong was a little dazed. She stared at Pei Wenxuan for a moment before it registered, then she smiled. "There's no one watching. What are you doing all this for?"

"These are the rules."

"We are husband and wife," Li Rong said, propping herself up on her arms on the bed to look at him. "Not sovereign and subject. Why do we need so many rules? My lord, please rise."

Pei Wenxuan hesitated for a moment. Li Rong said softly, "Is my lord unwilling?"

"Not at all." Pei Wenxuan made his decision. If she wanted to be husband and wife with him, then husband and wife they would be. So he rose and helped her get out of bed.

Li Rong was not the arrogant person he had imagined.

In fact, she was exceptionally gentle and considerate, with the delicate airs of a young lady, yet also possessing a wisdom rarely seen in others.

They went on outings together and enjoyed the pleasures of the bedchamber.

She was elegant at home, but had a wild streak in her bones.

One night, she told him that in all her years in the palace, she had never been to a lantern festival. Hearing this, his heart ached for her. So on the day of the Qixi Festival, he took her out of the palace.

She ran and skipped through the streets like a nimble bird, even changing into the attire of a Persian dancer and blending into the crowd, a sight no one could tear their eyes from.

She had her lively moments, and her quiet ones.

She loved his calligraphy and secretly tried to copy it. He would walk up behind her and watch her practice for a long time, never quite capturing the form. He couldn't help but raise his hand, cover hers, and say softly, "Let me teach you."

Li Rong's hand stilled, and the tips of her ears turned red. She lowered her head and gave a soft reply.

"Mm."

That tiny sound tugged at his heart.

Sweet and ticklish.

He didn't think of anything else, only that this young woman was utterly adorable.

At that time, the Shangguan Clan was at the height of its power. They were not pleased that he had become Li Rong's Imperial Son-in-Law; after all, he came from a humble background and had a lowly status. But since the marriage was a fact, the Shangguan Clan couldn't bear to let Li Rong be the wife of a ninth-rank minor official. Thus, thanks to the Shangguan Clan's favor, his leap from the ninth rank to the sixth rank and into the Censorate was a matter of a single day.

But he wasn't a fool. He knew full well that the Shangguan Clan's placing him in the Censorate was an olive branch that, once accepted, meant joining the struggle for succession at court.

He could actually see things clearly. Li Ming favored Li Cheng, and Li Chuan's family was too powerful; he was bound to fail sooner or later.

So on the day he was summoned for questioning by Shangguan Xu, he stayed up in his study, thinking for most of the night. When he returned to their room and saw Li Rong, he felt he had been thinking in vain.

He was, after all, Li Rong's husband. If Li Rong couldn't abandon Li Chuan, then he couldn't abandon Li Chuan either.

And so, the next day, he agreed to Shangguan Xu's proposal and entered the Censorate.

Having joined the court's conflicts, he could not afford to be complacent. From the moment he entered the Censorate, he worked extremely hard, currying favor with the powerful and always completing his tasks beyond expectation.

For this, he left early and returned late, yet Li Rong never complained.

Once, he drank too much and, afraid of waking Li Rong, slept on the small cot. In the middle of the night, he couldn't stop dry-heaving, eventually vomiting blood. When he came to, he sensed someone had lit a lamp. He turned his head and saw Li Rong standing before him, her expression fierce as she barked, "Go back to bed!"

That night, he learned that Li Rong did, in fact, have a temper.

And quite a big one at that.

He apologized in a low voice. Li Rong seemed somewhat sad. As she brought him water, Pei Wenxuan whispered, "I was wrong. I won't drink so much in the future. Don't be angry with me."

"I'm not angry with you," Li Rong said, her voice hoarse. "I'm angry with myself. Angry that I'm not capable enough."

But he knew she wasn't incapable; she was immensely capable.

In those early days of their marriage, their feelings might not have been at their peak, but they were advancing hand in hand.

Until early in the eighth month, when the news of Li Chuan's marriage was announced, and he heard Qin Zhenzhen's name once more.

Li Rong was chatting with him at the time, talking about the candidates Empress Shangguan had chosen. "Mother-Empress chose five young women this time. Two are from humble families, but don't look down on them—they hold military power. They'll be a great help to Chuan'er."

Humble family, military power. Hearing this, Pei Wenxuan felt a sense of unease and couldn't help but ask, "Who?"

"There's one you might know. The daughter of your father's old friend, named Qin Zhenzhen."

Li Rong said it casually. "Her status is a bit low, so Mother-Empress wants her to be a secondary consort. She was summoned to the palace to be seen a while ago. I heard she's fine in all other aspects, just a bit too straightforward."

Pei Wenxuan wasn't listening. He knew Qin Zhenzhen's temper. Was it just "a bit too straightforward"?

A panic seized his heart. He only managed to ask, "What about her brother?"

"Still at the border. Her family made the decision."

Li Rong assumed he was just concerned about an old acquaintance and said nonchalantly, "This matter is settled. It will be announced soon. I hope Chuan'er's marriage goes smoothly this time."

Pei Wenxuan said nothing. He was in a daze. Li Rong turned her head, finding him a bit strange. "Wenxuan?"

"Oh," Pei Wenxuan snapped back to reality. "It's nothing."

After all, it had nothing to do with him anymore. It wasn't a big deal.

The matter of Qin Zhenzhen was just a fleeting thought in his mind, and he didn't dwell on it. He and Li Rong continued with their lives, oblivious to the passage of time.

He only heard in passing that Li Chuan had married, and occasionally heard of some strife in Li Chuan's rear court.

He paid it no mind, until one day, as he was leaving Li Chuan's residence, he was stopped by Qin Zhenzhen's servant.

"Young Master, I beg you, please save my lady, Young Master."

Hearing the plea for help, Pei Wenxuan rushed to see Qin Zhenzhen.

She had caught a chill and was running a high fever, already delirious.

She had fallen into the water while saving someone, only to be falsely accused of pushing them. After being punished, she fell ill, with no medicine and no doctor.

Seeing an old friend in such a state, how could Pei Wenxuan rest easy? With Qin Lin away, he naturally took it upon himself to look after her. He immediately found a way to get her medicine and a doctor.

After doing all this, he felt it was somewhat improper. A sense of guilt from an unknown source made him instruct the servant, "Don't tell your lady I was here. Just say you were the one who hired them. If word gets out, it won't be good for me or for her."

The servant hastily agreed. Pei Wenxuan arranged everything and returned from the Crown Prince's residence. When he got back, he saw Li Rong waiting for him for dinner. She had specially prepared ginger soup, saying she was afraid he'd catch a cold.

"You spent a long time at Chuan'er's place today," Li Rong smiled. "He's like a fire god reincarnate and rarely uses charcoal braziers. I was worried you'd be cold."

Pei Wenxuan didn't know why, but his heart suddenly started racing. He lowered his head and answered with an "Mm."

Not knowing Qin Zhenzhen's situation had been one thing.

Now that he knew, Pei Wenxuan found it hard to let go.

They had known each other since childhood, and he was well aware of Qin Zhenzhen's temperament. Seeing her fall to such a state left him deeply unsettled. Having helped once, he gritted his teeth and helped a second time.

He deliberately led Li Chuan to Qin Zhenzhen, creating a chance encounter for them. After a few such instances, Qin Zhenzhen finally caught Li Chuan's eye, and her life improved.

During this time, Li Rong began to consult doctors everywhere.

They had been together for nearly a year, but there was still no sign of pregnancy, and she couldn't help but worry.

She didn't dare tell Pei Wenxuan, and since he had never cared about such things, he didn't notice anything unusual about her. He only happened to see her drinking medicine once and asked about it. She replied, "It's a beauty formula. I heard it can make one look even prettier."

Pei Wenxuan laughed at her answer, only reminding her, "Don't just take anything. Have an imperial physician check it. It would be bad if you harmed yourself."

Li Rong stuck out her tongue like a child.

With Qin Zhenzhen's life improving, Pei Wenxuan felt relieved, thinking that her future was now up to her own fortune and he no longer needed to interfere.

Who would have thought that during the Mid-Autumn Festival, the palace would hold a banquet to celebrate the Empress Dowager's birthday. All civil and military officials were invited, and Li Rong attended with him. While still at the banquet, he received news that Qin Zhenzhen had been drugged and locked in a side hall.

Who in the palace didn't know the sordid nature of such schemes? Hearing this, Pei Wenxuan knew the danger Qin Zhenzhen was in.

If he didn't save her, Qin Zhenzhen would be ruined today.

But to save her...

Pei Wenxuan didn't know why, but a panic rose in his heart.

But things had already come to this. He had to save her.

So he calculated the time, excused himself on the pretext of using the latrine, and then hurried to the side hall, intending to rescue her first.

Li Rong was drinking with someone at the banquet when she noticed Pei Wenxuan had disappeared. An inexplicable unease settled in her heart. A short while later, she couldn't help but ask Tong Ye, "Where is the Imperial Son-in-Law?"

Tong Ye panicked for a moment. Seeing his panic, Li Rong's expression instantly turned cold. She led Tong Ye out of the main hall and asked in a low voice, "Where is the Imperial Son-in-Law!"

Tong Ye immediately dropped to his knees and confessed everything. Hearing this, Li Rong took a deep breath, hitched up her skirt, and ran.

She sprinted all the way to the side hall and threw open the doors. There she saw Pei Wenxuan standing by the bed. On the bed lay a man and a woman. Pei Wenxuan heard the noise and turned, his face showing shock when he saw who it was.

"Rongrong..."

"Shut up."

Li Rong didn't say more, only, "You, get out."

"But..."

Before Pei Wenxuan could finish, he heard footsteps outside. Li Rong's face changed drastically. She immediately rushed forward and started dragging the man off the bed.

Pei Wenxuan didn't react. Li Rong snapped in a low voice, "What are you staring at! Hurry up and help me drag him. Beat him hard enough to leave marks. In a moment, you'll say you came looking for me, found this scoundrel acting suspiciously at the door, and knocked him out. Do you understand?!"

After speaking, Li Rong stomped furiously on the man's face, then took a harsh sniff from an incense burner and collapsed onto the bed.

Just as she fell, the door was kicked open. It was one of the Crown Prince's secondary consorts, Jiang-shi, standing at the door with Li Chuan and Empress Shangguan.

Everyone was stunned by the scene in the room. Li Chuan was the first to react, rushing in to help Li Rong up. "Sister? What's wrong, sister?"

Hearing this, Pei Wenxuan quickly came to his senses and recited the story Li Rong had given him. Empress Shangguan's expression instantly became extremely grim. Having seen everything in the palace, she immediately understood that Jiang-shi had plotted against Qin Shi and implicated Li Rong. She raised her hand and slapped Jiang-shi across the face, then quickly ordered the news to be suppressed.

She would not allow Li Rong's reputation to be damaged in the slightest.

The farce came to an abrupt end when Li Rong "woke up." Seeming tired, Li Rong took her leave from Empress Shangguan early and led Pei Wenxuan away.

On the way back, Pei Wenxuan felt very flustered. He was a little scared, and a little sour.

Li Rong sat in the carriage, her face devoid of any expression, a complete departure from the girl who usually joked and played with him. She sat there without a word, carrying the innate nobility of a princess.

When the carriage stopped, he got out first to help her down, but she acted as if he didn't exist and walked straight past him.

This feeling of being ignored left a sour taste in his mouth. He wanted to explain, but he couldn't.

What was there to explain?

He was the one who had wanted to save her, and Li Rong had indeed been implicated. What was there for him to explain?

He remembered the events of that night very clearly.

She asked him what his relationship with Qin Zhenzhen was.

He said he couldn't let her go.

Not love, not dislike, but unable to let go.

In fact, for so many years past, if anyone had asked him about his relationship with Qin Zhenzhen, he would have answered: childhood sweethearts, the one his heart desired.

But that time, facing Li Rong, he couldn't say the words.

But Li Rong would not tolerate a single grain of sand in her eye. And so his wife, his Rongrong, his Li Rong, personally proposed a separation.

He refused. So they went from separation to becoming allies.

At that time, he didn't truly understand what being "allies" meant. He himself didn't know that deep in his heart, Li Rong would always be his wife.

He accepted her proposal. That very night, they began to sleep in separate beds.

He slept on the small cot, and Li Rong slept on the bed.

That night, his heart ached with a suffocating pain. He wanted to make amends, yet he didn’t know what to seek.

All he could remember were Li Rong’s words, echoing over and over in his mind—

This arranged marriage was something neither of us chose. We both did it for power and influence. To be honest, there’s no romantic affection between us. You have someone in your heart, and I have someone in mine.

She had someone in her heart—who was it?

If she had someone in her heart, he shouldn’t hold her back, much less fall for her.

Falling for her would mean he had ultimately succumbed to imperial authority, unable to even guard his own heart.

Falling for her would only lead to heartbreak, as she would never return his feelings.

Falling for her—what would that make of his past feelings for Qin Zhenzhen? He had once vowed to love someone for a lifetime, promised to take care of Qin Zhenzhen, yet within a year, his heart had shifted. What kind of person did that make him?

His mind was a chaotic mess, and his heart felt unbearably stifled.

When he woke the next morning, he saw Li Rong sitting before the mirror, calmly drawing her eyebrows as if nothing had happened. He spoke softly, “Let me help you.”

“No need,” Li Rong looked up and smiled. “I don’t like other men drawing my eyebrows.”

Other men?

How could he be considered “other men”?

Those words pierced Pei Wenxuan’s heart. He knew Li Rong was saying it out of spite, but his own temper flared, and he turned and walked out.

From that day on, they slept in separate beds.

Sometimes, he tried to win her favor, only to discover that Li Rong was not just gentle and kind—she could also be sharp and confrontational.

His attempts at reconciliation were met with either indifference or disdain. Occasionally, she would glance at the things he sent and murmur softly, “Disgusting.”

Even if he was at fault, he was still human. After repeated rejections, his patience wore thin.

He began giving her the cold shoulder, refusing to speak to her.

She acted as if nothing was wrong, going about her day as usual. In public settings where they appeared together, she would take his arm, pretending they were a loving couple. But in private, her face would turn cold, revealing nothing.

One day, she went out and didn’t return until late at night.

He was frantic with worry. When she finally came back alone, she looked lost and heartbroken, as if she had been crying.

Panicked, he couldn’t help but ask, “What’s wrong?”

Li Rong looked up, her eyes fixed on him. For a long time, she said nothing.

The next day, when he returned from court, he found she had moved to another room.

He sent someone to investigate and learned that Li Rong had been looking into his past with Qin Zhenzhen.

When he heard this, he felt she was being unreasonable, yet he knew he was at fault. Unsure of what to do, he could only reply hoarsely when Tong Ye asked for instructions, “Let her be.”

Li Rong could not tolerate any hint of betrayal, and he had indeed betrayed her trust. This was the deadlock between them.

He didn’t know how long it would take to resolve it. He was waiting, and so was she.

He thought, surely one day, they would find a way?

But that day never came.

In the autumn of the twentieth year of Kangxing.

Their relationship grew increasingly strained. They were already living in separate quarters within the Princess’s Manor. She refused to see him, and whenever he tried to visit, she would have the gates shut. Aside from official matters, she never spoke to him privately.

That day, heavy rain poured down. He received news from the palace that Li Chuan and Li Ming had clashed, and Li Ming had taken his anger out on Li Rong, forcing her to kneel outside the imperial study.

“How long has she been kneeling?”

“Two hours.”

“Why wasn’t I told earlier?”

“Her Highness’s people didn’t inform us. The news came from someone in the palace.”Hearing these words, he felt a knot of anger in his chest. He hadn’t expected that even at such a time, Li Rong wouldn’t think of him.

He knew Li Rong’s legs were in poor condition, so he didn’t have time to dwell on his anger and hurried into the palace.

When he arrived, he saw Li Rong kneeling on the ground, with Su Rongqing holding an umbrella over her. The two of them stood in the rain, as beautiful as a painting, a match made in heaven.

A sharp pain suddenly pierced his heart, accompanied by a sense of panic.

Suppressing his emotions, he entered and, using a mix of persuasion and pressure, finally convinced Li Ming to release her.

When he stepped outside, he was met with Su Rongqing’s icy gaze.

“Why did you only come now?”

Su Rongqing questioned him. Upon hearing this, Pei Wenxuan first lowered his head to help Li Rong up, then swept a cold glance over him and replied, “What business is it of yours?”

Fury instantly flared in Su Rongqing’s eyes, a sudden burst of anger that left Pei Wenxuan momentarily stunned.

Before he could speak, however, he heard Li Rong’s weak voice: “Thank you, Minister Su, for today.”

“I was of little help to Your Highness,” Su Rongqing’s voice was hoarse. “There is no need for thanks.”

“For Minister Su to be here,” Li Rong chuckled softly, a smile Pei Wenxuan hadn’t seen in a long time. He felt jealousy and unease, yet he still had to maintain his composure as Li Rong expressed her gratitude, “I am already deeply grateful.”

After a brief exchange of pleasantries, the two bid farewell and left.

There was nothing outwardly wrong with the scene, yet Pei Wenxuan couldn’t shake the feeling of something lodged in his heart.

He sensed that something had happened but didn’t know what it was. He escorted Li Rong home, and once they were in the carriage, he finally erupted: “Why didn’t you send someone to tell me when something happened?”

“It wasn’t a big deal. Why should I tell you everything about my affairs?”

“Li Rong,” Pei Wenxuan, momentarily losing his senses, couldn’t help but ask, “do you still remember that I am your husband?”

Hearing this, Li Rong looked at him in astonishment: “Pei Wenxuan, have you lost your mind? What kind of husband are you to me? If that’s what you truly believe, let me make it clear—we should still divorce.”

He didn’t know what had come over him, but the moment he heard the word “divorce,” he suddenly lost the courage to argue. Turning his head away, he said, “As you wish. Just spare me some dignity and don’t go around provoking others.”

Li Rong thought his words were absurd. She found a spot, lay down, and fell asleep.

Pei Wenxuan knew that now, not only would she not let him touch her, but even his mere presence annoyed her. He could only sit to the side, toss a dry set of clothes to her, and walk out.

The cold war between them dragged on. They worked together to support Li Chuan’s ascension to the throne, then stood on opposing sides, arguing in court and continuing their quarrels at home. If he didn’t argue with Li Rong, she would simply ignore him. Seeing her indifference only deepened his frustration, making him prefer the arguments.

In the third year of Dexu, Qin Zhenzhen died from poisoning. Li Rong slapped Li Chuan twice. That night, Li Rong, for once, didn’t argue with him. They drank together in the courtyard, and this rare moment of peace filled him with an indescribable sense of emotion.

He couldn’t help but ask her: “You seem to be in a good mood today?”

“I’m not an unreasonable person,” Li Rong smiled. “I know you’re upset, so I’ll give in to you.”

Pei Wenxuan was momentarily speechless. In truth, he wasn’t all that upset.

After all these years, Qin Zhenzhen’s life or death seemed to matter little.

Everyone had their own fate, and he couldn’t control everything.

He couldn’t even control himself.

But he didn’t know why, nor did he say anything.He didn't want Li Rong to know he no longer liked Qin Zhenzhen—it made him feel an indescribable sense of shame.

After all... Li Rong didn't like him either.

Who did Li Rong like?

He always had an answer in his heart, but he didn't dare think about it.

After all, that person was now nearly thirty, of such noble birth, yet had never married. He knew why.

He feared that answer, to the point where he’d rather not know.

In those years with Li Rong, they quarreled while also relying on each other.

Too much happened in those years. Li Chuan and the Shangguan family fought to the death, Shangguan H and Shangguan Xu died one after another, and Pei Wenxuan became Li Rong's only support.

Though she hardly ever leaned on anyone.

Only on the night Shangguan H died, she cried uncontrollably. Pei Wenxuan held her in his arms, saying nothing.

At that moment, for a brief instant, Pei Wenxuan thought she had come back.

But later he realized that some wounds, once inflicted, never heal.

In the seventh year of Dexu, the Su Clan collapsed.

For the sake of the Su family, Li Rong publicly argued with Li Chuan in court, even invoking Shangguan H, threatening to depose Li Chuan.

Enraged, Li Chuan ordered Li Rong to be caned in court. When Pei Wenxuan heard, he rushed over. By the time he arrived, he saw Li Rong lying on a bench, covered in blood.

He had never seen Li Rong like this and panicked at the sight. But Li Rong grabbed his hand and said only, "I must protect the Su family."

His hands trembled. Li Rong looked up, staring at him. "I beg you."

It was the first time she had ever begged him. He couldn't refuse, nor did he dare.

He feared that if he didn't help, Li Rong might do something even more drastic.

Li Chuan, already feeling some remorse for having Li Rong beaten, took the opportunity to relent when Pei Wenxuan offered a way out. However, while the death penalty was spared, punishment was unavoidable. The entire Su Clan was subjected to palace punishment, with the male members committing suicide in prison. Only Su Rongqing survived.

Li Rong insisted on bringing Su Rongqing back to her manor. When Pei Wenxuan heard the news, he rode straight from the palace to the Princess's Manor, pushed open the door, and shouted, "I heard you plan to keep Su Rongqing here? I won't allow it!"

"What does your permission have to do with me? This is the Princess's Manor, not the Pei residence. If you don't agree," Li Rong raised her hand, pointing at the door, "then get out."

Pei Wenxuan stared at Li Rong. Jing Mei hurried over, anxiously saying, "Your Highness, it's terrible—Young Master Su has woken up and is trying to kill himself again..."

Hearing this, Li Rong immediately tried to leave, but Pei Wenxuan grabbed her. "You're not going anywhere!"

"What madness is this?!"

Li Rong frowned. "The entire Su Clan is dead, and he's the only one left. I can't let anything happen to him now."

"I won't allow him to stay in the Princess's Manor. If you keep him here," Pei Wenxuan glared at her, "I'll leave."

Hearing this, Li Rong was taken aback. After a moment, she laughed, pushed him aside, and said, "Leave then. You're insane."

With that, Li Rong walked out.

Pei Wenxuan stood in the main hall.

She didn't care.

She didn't try to stop him.

Whether he stayed or left, she was indifferent.

What was he to her? She was right—he was insane, insane for staying in the Princess's Manor, degrading himself like this.

He couldn't bear to stay under the same roof as Su Rongqing for another moment. That night, he packed his things and returned to the Pei residence.

He thought that once he returned to the Pei residence, he would let go and live a little better. But he didn't.

Every night, he would wake up startled, thinking of Li Rong, wondering what she was doing, wondering if she was with Su Rongqing.He was especially grateful that Su Rongqing was a eunuch—he could do nothing. That was his only consolation.

He tried to distance himself from Li Rong—not listening, not seeing, not thinking.

He didn’t know how much time had passed. In the tenth year of Dexu, when he was thirty-four, the Qixi Festival lanterns were hung in a grand display. Led by Tong Ye, he went out onto the streets.

Walking alone, watching the young people coming and going, he remembered the Qixi Festival when he was twenty, walking with Li Rong.

As he thought, he couldn’t help but smile. Looking up, he saw Li Rong.

Li Rong stood in the crowd. She hadn’t aged at all; compared to when she was eighteen, she had gained a gentle softness bestowed by time. She looked up at the foreign performers on stage doing acrobatics, cheering and clapping loudly at the exciting parts.

Pei Wenxuan watched from afar. It was the most content moment he had experienced since leaving the Princess’s Manor.

He realized he still had to go back. After all, he was still her husband.

But as he stepped forward to greet Li Rong, he saw Su Rongqing appear behind her, holding a lantern.

Li Rong turned to look at him, her gaze falling on the lantern in Su Rongqing’s hand. Suddenly, her eyes turned cold.

Then, like a young girl, she threw herself into his arms. Su Rongqing held the lantern in one hand and embraced her with the other, whispering softly, “Your Highness, be careful.”

He was no different from before—still elegant and noble. Even as a half-crippled man, his grace remained undiminished.

They embraced under the lanterns, a picture of perfect beauty.

He felt like an extra, someone who shouldn’t exist at all.

His heart twisted. He didn’t know what was wrong with him, but he watched the two of them with a self-destructive gaze, unable to look away.

They held hands, just as he had at twenty.

They walked down the long street, just as he had at twenty.

Li Rong laughed and clung to him, acting coquettishly, just as she had at twenty.

Under the fireworks, Li Rong stood on her tiptoes and gently kissed him.

Just as he had experienced at twenty.

He watched them return to the Princess’s Manor before turning back to the long street.

He guessed lantern riddles all the way, winning lanterns from every stall.

Tong Ye couldn’t bear it any longer and whispered, “Young Master, perhaps we should go back.”

“Go back where?”

Pei Wenxuan was bewildered.

He didn’t know where to go.

Seeing Pei Wenxuan’s state, Tong Ye finally advised him, “Go back to the Princess’s Manor. After all, you are the Imperial Son-in-Law. No one can stop you from returning. Su Rongqing is a eunuch—he can’t do anything. Go back, apologize to Her Highness, and live well together.”

Apologize and live well.

Apologize, admit defeat.

If he just admitted it, perhaps she would turn back to him.

Standing on the long street, for the first time, he wanted so badly to turn back, to return and reclaim everything that belonged to him.

Before he knew it, he was running wildly, rushing back to the Princess’s Manor and pounding on the gate.

The gatekeeper was stunned to see him. “Imperial Son-in-Law?”

Pei Wenxuan said nothing, pushing the door to enter. The gatekeeper quickly reacted, saying, “Imperial Son-in-Law, please wait while I announce your arrival.”

“Announce what?” Pei Wenxuan was angered by these words. “This is my home. I’m returning to find my wife. Do you need to announce that?! All of you, stay where you are!”

Pei Wenxuan shouted loudly, and guards rushed in, blocking the Princess’s Manor’s attendants.

Pei Wenxuan hurried forward. He had made up his mind—he would apologize to Li Rong, admit defeat to Li Rong, he and Li Rong…Yet all his fantasies came to a halt the moment he heard Li Rong's soft gasps.

His footsteps paused outside the door. He listened to the sounds inside—sounds he knew all too well.

Only this time, Li Rong wasn’t calling his name. She was calling Su Rongqing.

She said, “Rongqing, faster, be gentle.”

He wanted to go in.

He wanted to kill Su Rongqing.

He had never wanted to kill someone so badly.

He should have thought of it earlier—he just hadn’t dared to.

Even if he were a eunuch, as long as they were in love, there would always be a way.

But what right did he have?

What identity did he hold?

She had once treated him well, had once loved him. It was he who had hurt her.

When she risked her life to save Su Rongqing, he had suffered. When he saved Qin Zhenzhen, hadn’t she suffered just as much?

He stood at the door, listening to Li Rong and Su Rongqing’s voices. After a long while, he finally turned away.

It was as if he had suddenly sobered up. He left, dejected.

He wandered aimlessly down the road for a long time, clearly realizing that Li Rong had left—left their world. She had found someone new. She had truly, completely, let go.

This realization stuck in his throat like a fishbone, and he couldn’t help but recall that a minister had invited him to a banquet tonight. He had originally refused because the venue was a brothel, but now he suddenly decided to go.

He thought, perhaps it was time for him to move on too.

He attended the minister’s banquet. The host arranged for a courtesan who was still a virgin. He and the girl sat on the bed. She looked to be only eighteen or nineteen, sitting on the edge of the bed. They sat on opposite sides, and when he turned his head, it felt as if Li Rong was sitting there.

Li Rong at eighteen, on the night of their wedding, had sat just like that.

His mind was filled with her shadow, making it impossible for him to touch anyone else. So he had the girl taken away and drank himself into a stupor alone in the brothel.

In his early years in the officialdom, he had drunk too heavily, damaging his stomach. Now that he held a high position and wielded great power, few dared to force him to drink, and he had been taking care of himself.

But suddenly, he didn’t want to take care of himself anymore. He drank cup after cup until he collapsed on the ground, vomiting blood. When he regained consciousness, he was already lying in the Pei residence. As soon as he opened his eyes, he saw Li Rong beside him, her head lowered as she read a book. Noticing he was awake, she looked up and said with a smile, “Awake? Going to that kind of place and drinking yourself into such a state—you’re really something.”

“Why are you here?”

Pei Wenxuan’s voice was hoarse. Li Rong put down her book. “Minister Wang came to find me last night, saying something had happened to you. You were so drunk, yet you kept calling my name, still causing trouble for me. You really are something.”

Pei Wenxuan said nothing. He was gathering his thoughts, trying to say something lighthearted, when he heard Su Rongqing’s voice from outside: “Your Highness, it’s time. We should return to the residence.”

“Alright,” Li Rong said upon hearing Su Rongqing’s words. She stood up and bid farewell to Pei Wenxuan. “I have to go back now. If you go to that kind of place in the future, sleep with a girl. Don’t just keep drinking. If you drink yourself to death…”

“What if I drink myself to death?”

Pei Wenxuan cut her off. Li Rong smiled. “If you drink yourself to death, it won’t be easy to find someone else to cooperate with me like you do. Lord Pei, you’d better live a long life.”

“Why don’t you call me Imperial Son-in-Law?”

Pei Wenxuan suddenly brought up the issue of address. Li Rong was taken aback. After a moment, she remembered. “Given how things are between us now, it wouldn’t be appropriate to call you that anymore. Besides…”Li Rong thought for a moment, hesitating as she said, "I'm with Rongqing now. Though it feels a bit apologetic to say," she looked up and smiled, "but... maybe one day, I'll have to trouble you."

"Trouble me with what?"

"I still think, if you like someone, you should be together."

"Together?" Pei Wenxuan sneered, "Aren't you already together?"

"We haven't married," Li Rong pondered. "If possible, I'd still like to marry him and be together properly."

Pei Wenxuan fell silent, clenching his fists under the covers.

"He's a eunuch."

Li Rong remained quiet, and Pei Wenxuan couldn't help but remind her, "You're a princess. If you marry him, you'll become the laughingstock of the realm."

"I know it's difficult," Li Rong lowered her head and smiled, like a young girl.

He hadn't seen her like this in years. Li Rong whispered, "I'm just thinking about it. Alright, I won't say more. I have things to attend to."

With that, Li Rong stood up and walked out.

As she stepped outside, she reached out without hesitation toward Su Rongqing. Su Rongqing was taken aback, but Li Rong took his hand and cheerfully said, "Let's go."

Watching them walk away, he lowered his head, feeling afraid.

He was terrified.

He began counting his days like a condemned man, planting many informants in the Princess's Manor to gather news about Su Rongqing and Li Rong.

Su Rongqing was never proactive, and Li Rong seemed reserved as well. They never broached the topic of marriage.

He felt both relieved and sorrowful.

That winter, Madam Wen finally passed away.

On the day he was keeping vigil for her, Li Rong came to accompany him. Surprised, they knelt together before the altar, watching the flickering flames of the seven-star lamp. Pei Wenxuan couldn't help but ask, "Why are you here?"

"The year my mother passed away, you stayed with me," Li Rong looked up and smiled at him. "This time, let me stay with you."

Having someone by your side makes all the difference.

She stayed with him, talking about Madam Wen—something so simple. When she was about to leave the next day, he suddenly grabbed her.

He clung to her as if she were the last lifeline in this world.

Suddenly, everything else seemed unimportant.

Whether Su Rongqing was there or not no longer mattered.

He didn't want to walk alone anymore, like a wandering ghost in this world. He couldn't go on by himself.

Holding her hand, he rasped, "Don't go."

"Rongrong, I was wrong. Let's make up, please?"

Li Rong was stunned, and in that moment, the door to the mourning hall was suddenly pushed open, as if a beautiful dream had shattered. Su Rongqing stood at the entrance, quietly watching Li Rong.

"Your Highness," he said softly, "it's time to go."

Li Rong snapped back to reality, seeming embarrassed. She tried to pull her hand away, but Pei Wenxuan refused to let go. He had never been so desperate, clinging to her fiercely.

"I was wrong," he pleaded through tears. "Rongrong, I was wrong. Don't go, stay with me."

But she paid no heed.

She ignored his final plea and cry for help, dismissing it as grief over his mother's death. She ordered others to pry his hands away and ensure he was well cared for.

Many people restrained him, treating him as if he were mad, preventing him from going after her.

They said he didn't truly love her, urging him to maintain his dignity and not cling desperately.

He drifted in a daze, unaware of how much time had passed. One day, he woke up and saw Madam Wen's memorial tablet, realizing it was the day of her burial.He carried Madam Wen up the mountain, watching the white flowers dancing in the sky. He knew that no matter what, his life had to go on.

And so it went on, and he began one lie after another.

He loved Qin Zhenzhen.

He did not love Li Rong.

In this way, he never surrendered to imperial power, he would never suffer, he would never regret.

He was not wrong. He lost Li Rong, but he felt no regret, no remorse—it didn’t matter.

Day after day, he told himself this.

In the final ten years, both he and Li Rong grew increasingly temperamental.

Su Rongqing ultimately refused Li Rong, and so she had no choice but to continue this standoff with him.

One year, ten years.

Thirty whole years passed in the blink of an eye, until the final moment—Li Rong died from poison, and he perished by the blade.

Together they faced imperial power, only to be reborn once more.

Upon rebirth, they met again in the spring of the eighteenth year of Kangxing.

This time, she did not choose him, so he hosted a palace banquet.

Yet after more than a decade of denial—denial so deep he had forgotten his own true feelings—those feelings remained.

No matter how many times he denied them, he still stirred up chaos at the spring banquet where she was selecting a husband.

No one was allowed to approach Li Rong.

She was his wife.