The Double

Chapter 233: Dream Night

The speaker was a woman, her voice exceptionally gentle yet carrying a carefree frankness that felt soothing to the heart.

Immediately after, what seemed to be a maid in the courtyard added, "Since the young master became the top scholar, the madam and young miss have been treating our lady even more harshly."

"It's nothing. Today he just achieved this honor, so naturally there are many social engagements. Yurong has no choice. Don't speak nonsense, Du Juan."

Top scholar? Shen Yurong? Upon hearing this name, Ji Heng instantly understood. He knew of Shen Yurong—the recently appointed top scholar from the latest imperial examinations. Hongxiao Emperor had previously mentioned plans to bestow a residence upon him. It was said this Scholar Shen came from a commoner family with impoverished circumstances, and indeed, he lived in such a humble alley.

Ji Heng wasn't fond of eavesdropping on domestic disputes, but today he didn't leave. Perhaps due to exhaustion, he lacked the energy to move and simply sat on the wall, quietly listening to the conversation inside.

"But today is the Spring Welcoming Festival. Even if the young master has engagements, the madam and young miss went to the temple fair themselves, leaving our lady alone in the mansion. Isn't this deliberate bullying? Our lady is just too kind. If the young master were here, he would surely stand up for her."

"Haitang, you're talking nonsense again." The woman's voice remained unbothered, carrying a light laugh. "With them gone, I can enjoy some peace. Don't you know how tiring it is to put on appearances every day? Having a moment of relaxation is a rare treat for me."

"The Shen family has too many rules. They're not some noble household. Back in the Xue family, our lady never had to endure such hardships."

The maid in the courtyard seemed particularly resentful of the Shen family, repeatedly referring to her mistress as "our lady," clearly treating the matriarch as an outsider. As Ji Heng listened, he gradually recalled that he had actually met Shen Yurong's wife before.

Everyone in Yanjing knew of his preference for beauty and disdain for ugliness—any notable beauty had to catch his eye, as if gaining his approval was a great honor. Little did they know he had no such hobby. Apart from Yu Hongye, all women in the world were mere mediocrity in his eyes. When Wenren Yao pointed out Xue Fangfei from a distance in the tavern, his heart was filled with nothing but disdain.

This Xue Fangfei was renowned for her peerless beauty and mastery of the four arts—qin, chess, calligraphy, and painting. Yet in Ji Heng's eyes, she was utterly worthless. Seeing her indulgent and submissive attitude toward her mother-in-law and sister-in-law, sacrificing her own happiness for the Shen family, he found it grating. He merely thought, "Beautiful indeed, but utterly soulless." He had never considered what kind of woman he might like in the future, but one as rigid as a puppet, bustling and cunning like all official wives, with vulgarity hidden beneath a smile—he wouldn't even glance at such a person. How could someone like that be called "Yanjing's Number One Beauty"?

His impression of Xue Fangfei had only extended this far. He never expected that today, separated by just a wall, he would encounter a different Xue Fangfei. Unlike the one he saw in the tavern, she wasn't a fool nor beyond redemption—at least she knew what she liked and disliked. Unfortunately, she loved Shen Yurong more than she loved herself, which was why she was willing to sacrifice her own "likes" for his sake.So this thing called love is the most foolish matter in the world. What’s the point of pouring your heart and soul into someone, only to gain nothing in return? It’s far better to remain an eternally sober spectator, applauding with a smile from the sidelines.

“Does the young lady wish to swing?” the maid asked.

Inside the wall, Xue Fangfei sighed with a soft laugh. “It’s been so long. It’s rare that they’re away from the estate, granting me a moment of freedom.” She seemed to be seated on the swing, gently swaying back and forth.

It was as if one could see through the wall before him—a peerless beauty with hibiscus-like features, sitting on the swing, a smile gracing her lips, her figure graceful and delicate. It was a scene more splendid than spring itself. He could have leaped onto the wall to catch a glimpse of her radiance, but he did nothing, merely leaning lazily against the wall, a mocking smile curling at the corner of his lips.

Even with unparalleled intelligence, talent, and beauty, she was confined to such a humble dwelling, where even swinging in the courtyard had become a luxury. Was there anything more pitiable in this world? At the very least, Ji Heng found this Lady Shen somewhat pitiable. She herself was foolishly pitiable—how could she find joy in such a hopeless and humble existence? Was this what they called “fools have fortune”?

In Ji Heng’s eyes, having met Shen Yurong only a few times, he knew Shen Yurong was far from someone content with poverty and simplicity. The ambition and desire in his eyes burned brighter than his literary talents. He and the woman in this courtyard, who could find happiness in something as simple as swinging, were not the same kind of people. And not being the same kind of people meant they were destined not to walk together for long. The happiness and fulfillment Xue Fangfei believed in would inevitably be shattered one day. Xue Fangfei couldn’t see it because she was a player in the drama, while he could see it because he was the spectator.

“We’ve been in Yanjing City for several years now, and we’ve never once been to a temple fair,” the maid grumbled. “The lady claims it’s because the young lady’s beauty is too striking, fearing she might catch the eye of ill-intentioned people. That’s clearly just an excuse. If that were the case, wouldn’t everyone attending temple fairs across the land be considered unattractive?”

Xue Fangfei laughed from the courtyard. “Haitang, why must you be so particular? It’s just a temple fair. Back in Tongxiang, didn’t you attend plenty?”

“It’s precisely because we attended so many in Tongxiang, but here in Yanjing City, we haven’t been to a single one. This life is even worse than the one we had in Tongxiang. It doesn’t matter for a servant like me, but it’s a pity for you, young lady. The temple fairs in Yanjing City are far livelier than those in Tongxiang. Every time the young master writes, he asks about you, and it must be hard for you to fabricate stories in reply every time.”

Xue Fangfei chuckled. “That fool Ah Zhao believes everything I say. He’s just curious for now. In the future, when he truly travels the world and ventures into the martial arts realm, how could he possibly care about a mere temple fair? By then, it’ll be me writing to ask him what new and interesting things he’s seen to share with his elder sister.”She didn't seem the least bit angry. Even when facing such unjust harsh treatment and the sharp tongues of her mother-in-law and sister-in-law, she paid them no mind, speaking only of pleasant and delightful things. On this side, Ji Heng's lips curled into an even more pronounced sneer. He had seen foolish people before, but never one this foolish. How could such a foolish woman exist in this world? No wonder so many men spoke of the Top Scholar's Wife with such yearning. There were many beautiful women in the world, and many foolish ones too, but beautiful yet foolish women were far rarer. Especially when this woman wasn't truly foolish but merely pretending—what was truly remarkable was that she had kept up the act for so many years. Was she deceiving herself? Or did she genuinely believe this was perfectly fine?

Ji Heng wasn't a woman, so he didn't understand a woman's heart, nor did he wish to.

Yet as he listened to this woman speak, he found it somewhat amusing. Indeed, he wasn't the only one in the world who had suffered. There were plenty of people with tragic pasts. This Lady Shen, the most beautiful woman in Yanjing, lived such a miserable life and still acted foolishly. Compared to his own early awakening to face the darkness, he wondered which of them was truly worse off.

"Does the young lady not resent it at all?" The maid inside spoke again. "The young lady refuses to write home and tell the master about these matters. If the master and young master knew, they would surely stand up for you. The young lady has never endured such grievances before."

"Dujuan, these things are nothing," Xue Fangfei's voice came from the other side. She said, "I do all this willingly for Yu Rong's sake. As long as Yu Rong understands my efforts, I am content. If Yu Rong were to take my sacrifices for granted, then I would be disheartened. But the way of marriage is something worth studying—who can expect everything to go perfectly all the time? If we're talking about truly carefree days, perhaps only in our ignorant childhood. Since I made this choice myself, there's no reason for regret. I'll just grit my teeth and press forward. If it becomes truly unbearable, I'll find another path. But for now, it hasn't reached that point, so there's no need to dwell on it."

"No reason for regret?" Ji Heng raised an eyebrow. Did Xue Fangfei's words imply some hidden regret? Yet she was remarkably frank, possessing a kind of desperate courage. It made sense—she had married into Yanjing City from a distant place, with everything seeming perfect before the marriage, only to face hardships she had never anticipated. Ji Heng, however, was different. For many years, he had gradually come to accept the fact that "Ji Mínghán would die one day." When it came to adapting to life's changes, it seemed he hadn't handled it as well as this foolish woman.

The livelier maid chimed in, "I heard there will be an opera troupe at the temple fair tonight. We've been in Yanjing City for several years now, and I haven't had the chance to watch an opera again. What a pity when I think about it."

Xue Fangfei's voice remained gentle as she replied, "What's the big deal? I can sing opera too, though not very well. Why don't you treat me as an opera singer, and I'll perform a piece from The Locked Linang Pouch for you?"On the other side of the wall, Ji Heng was slightly taken aback. He had never heard of any young lady voluntarily performing opera for servants. Opera performers belonged to the lowest rungs of society's hierarchy—while noblewomen enjoyed watching operas as entertainment, they never performed them themselves. In his childhood, he had learned opera only due to his master's peculiar whims; being young and unaware, he had been coaxed into studying it. But it had been a long time since he last sang, and he never expected this seemingly graceful and poised Lady Shen to be capable of performing opera.

Moreover, she was singing The Locked Linang Pouch.

In the opera, the wealthy young lady happened to share the surname Xue. The character Xue Xiangling first married into a distant land, then was separated from her family during a great flood while fleeing disaster, drifting alone to a foreign place. Through twists of fate, her life underwent a dramatic transformation.

Xue Fangfei's voice was exceptionally clear and bright, particularly moving in the night. She was already singing the part about the wealthy young lady's life after marriage.

"After the wedding, time flies unnoticed, / Youth remains with a jade-like complexion and rosy cheeks. / Riding in a carriage with my beloved child, touring the long streets, / Then hearing heart-wrenching cries shake the earth and sky."

The sorrowful lyrics, when sung by her, did not evoke sadness but instead carried a crisp, playful tone, as if she cared little about them. She did not resemble a troubled woman but rather a young maiden new to the world, full of novelty and surprise, with no trace of self-pity.

She truly did not seem like someone living a difficult life.

"My stomach growls with hunger, but my husband is nowhere in sight, / Why is there no pavilion in this desolate wilderness? / Could it be the merciless flood has struck? / Hazily, I board a boat with the crowd. / My dear mother may have met her end in the waves, / My poor, cherished child buried in the bellies of fish. / Have you seen my husband and my mother? / Accompany me back to my homeland to search for their remains."

Ji Heng was an exceedingly critical person. The world said he loved watching operas, but in truth, he enjoyed observing the characters trapped in their roles, weeping and rejoicing over joys and sorrows that were not their own. He always remained an audience member. Xue Fangfei sang with a perfunctory air, never fully immersing herself in the opera. The tragic lyrics lacked bitterness in her rendition, instead taking on a cheerful tone. She was no true opera performer, nor was her singing particularly brilliant, yet strangely, Ji Heng felt no disgust. Instead, he sat quietly on the other side of the wall, listening as if the voice carried warmth, soothing and calming his heart, which had long been as cold as if dredged from an ice cellar.

She sang:

"In an instant, all past affections are forgotten, / Understanding the bitterness, tears soak my sleeves."

"I once believed iron-clad wealth was my destiny, / Who knew life's fortunes could change in a blink. / In those years, I was willful and capricious, / Now, I no longer doubt the twists of fate."

"This is a lesson from heaven: / It teaches me to let go of regrets, avoid pride, / Renew myself, change my nature, / Cease clinging to the past, turn back from the sea of suffering, / And early comprehend the causes of fate."

In the opera, the young lady of the Xue family faced great upheaval and was forced to become a servant in another's household. At this point, she felt the stark contrast between past and present. When Xue Fangfei sang this part, a faint trace of melancholy tinged her voice—so subtle, yet Ji Heng caught it. This beautiful young lady likely was not entirely happy, though her sorrows might differ greatly from those of Xue Xiangling in the opera. Xue Xiangling experienced a fall from wealth to poverty, while Xue Fangfei, though seemingly living a better life, had lost her freedom.It was this touch of melancholy that made Ji Heng realize this woman was far from foolish—she knew everything, yet chose to endure in silence. Whatever her reasons, he found a faint resemblance to his own plight, a shared sense of suffering. Yet Xue Fangfei was entirely different from him. Her singing was filled with openness and composure, brightness and integrity, as if even if the path ahead were shrouded in darkness, she would stride forward without hesitation, grandly and fearlessly.

On this warm, breezy night in Yanjing City, filled with soft music and graceful dances, countless sordid dealings lay hidden in the shadows. But her voice was like a sliver of light, briefly illuminating the darkness and revealing its true nature.

Yet Ji Heng also knew that a woman so open and upright, one who saw through everything yet chose such a seemingly foolish path, would inevitably be buried on a night like this. Her husband had no need for light; as someone who dwelled in darkness himself, Ji Heng understood better than anyone what such a man truly desired. Once Shen Yurong needed to sacrifice his wife, he would not hesitate to do so.

This lady understood that, yet her trust had shattered her cleverness, leaving her deceived as well.

What could one say?

Ji Heng did not know what to say. She was singing The Locked Linang Pouch, but the woman singing was not lost in the drama—she remained composed and fervent, while he, the detached observer who had intended only to watch, found himself captivated instead. It was truly a peculiar experience. But one thing was undeniable: on his side of the wall, listening to the woman’s rough yet heartfelt singing on the other side, the despair that had driven him to thoughts of death slowly, imperceptibly, began to fade.

He found peace in her performance. If a woman could face life without fear, what did he have to fear? Even if he had no one to rely on for the rest of his days, it was no great tragedy.

Slowly, he rose from his perch on the wall.

On the other side, Xue Fangfei swayed on a swing, her laughter drifting from the courtyard. Such a fair maiden’s smile—how many would yearn to catch a glimpse of her beauty? Standing beneath the wall, Ji Heng was struck, in that moment, by the thought that Xue Fangfei might truly be a beauty.

True beauty lies in the bones, not the skin, yet this beauty seemed unaware of her own charm. Her demeanor was gentle and endearing, appearing utterly without temper, like a wildflower not yet in bloom—indistinguishable from others before it opens. But when it bursts forth in full fervor, who could predict the splendor of its colors?

It was a pity she was planted in the Shen family’s courtyard, destined never to know if she would have the chance to bloom for herself.

A faint smile touched his lips, his eyes soft as water, as he walked along the wall to the entrance of the Xue residence. The gate, made of crude wooden planks, was far from sturdy, and through the gaps, he could glimpse the courtyard. With a light glance, he saw, under the night sky, a young woman in simple cloth robes, radiant as peach blossoms, sitting on the swing with a charming, cheerful smile.

Beneath the Milky Way, her smile was gentler than the spring breeze, her eyes sparkling like stars, brilliantly bright. She seemed to sense someone’s gaze and turned to look toward the gate, her face still adorned with an unretracted smile. In that instant, the scene was so beautiful it could etch itself into memory for a lifetime.

Xue Fangfei paused the swing, puzzled, as Haitang asked, "Miss, what is it?"She shook her head and walked to the door. After a moment's thought, she pushed it open to find nothing but emptiness outside, only a gentle breeze brushing against her face like an old friend's greeting. Stepping out, she gazed toward the end of the narrow alley, where she seemed to catch glimpses of crimson light, like the fleeting shadows of spirits, before everything vanished.

Only a faint lingering fragrance remained.

...

On a night of howling wind and snow, she dreamed of a spring evening. In the dream, intoxicated by the spring breeze, Jiang Li saw herself during her time as "Lady Shen." Left alone in her room by Shen's mother and Shen Ruyun during the Spring Welcoming Festival, she watched as a handsome man in red robes walked to the other end of the courtyard, a smile on his lips as he listened to her finish singing "The Locked Linang Pouch."

The dream was still filled with the lingering, melodic notes, but the sound gradually drifted far away. Strangely, her memory fixated on the moment when someone passed by her door, their eyes meeting through the gaps in the wooden fence. Her smile remained, and his eyes sparkled with amusement, as if that single glance spanned countless millennia.

Until Jiang Li awoke from the dream.

Wen Ji and Zhao Ke had already arrived and were standing guard outside the cave. As Jiang Li sat up, Ji Heng walked in from outside. He handed her a water flask and asked with a smile, "Awake?"

Jiang Li stared at his face, unable to decide whether it felt unfamiliar or familiar, lost in a daze.

"What's wrong?" he asked, puzzled but still smiling.

"Ji Heng..." Jiang Li hesitated before asking, "Three years ago, on the night of the Spring Welcoming Festival, did you pass by the Shen family's door?"

The scene in her dream was so vivid, as if it had truly happened. The memory was too distant, and she couldn't tell whether it was real or not. But she still remembered everything that had happened the previous night—Ji Heng singing "The Locked Linang Pouch," a song she had once sung herself.

Ji Heng raised an eyebrow and sat down on the ground in front of her. "It seems you've remembered," he said.

"You... I..." Jiang Li was at a loss for words.

She had once believed that the entanglement between her and Ji Heng in her past life was nothing more than his remark, "Beautiful, yes, but utterly soulless." Though she thought Ji Heng wasn't entirely wrong, it hadn't amounted to any real connection. Yet she never knew that on that night—the night Ji Mínghán died—he had sat outside her wall, listening to her sing "The Locked Linang Pouch" to the end.

Was this the twist of fate? Jiang Li didn't understand. But if she could return to that night now, she wouldn't let Ji Heng leave like that. At the very least, she would have spoken to him again. During his most desperate moment.

"In the future, I'll teach you to sing opera," he said, patting Jiang Li's head. "You were off-key."

Jiang Li: "..." Suddenly remembering something more important, she turned to Ji Heng and asked urgently, "How are your injuries?"

The previous day, Ji Heng had been severely wounded. Today, he seemed refreshed and able to joke with her, but Jiang Li was still worried, suspecting he was putting on a brave face.

"It's nothing. Situ's medicine works well," Ji Heng said. "No need to worry about such minor injuries."

"But you were badly hurt."

"Not badly," Ji Heng replied. "What about you? Are you injured?"

Jiang Li shook her head. She still wanted to check his wounds, but Ji Heng evaded her. Zhao Ke came over and assured her that Ji Heng was fine, so Jiang Li asked instead what had happened between Yin Zhan and Ji Heng. All she knew was that Yin Zhan was dead.Ji Heng looked at her, his smile fading slightly. "Do you really want to know?"

Jiang Li nodded.

Things had reached this point, and it seemed meaningless to keep hiding the truth. Ji Heng said, "Alright, I'll tell you."

Jiang Li listened for a very, very long time.

Ji Heng told her everything—from the entanglements between Yu Hongye, Ji Mínghán, Yin Zhan, and Lin Roujia, to what Yin Zhan had done for Lin Roujia all these years. He even spoke of earlier events, how he had begun investigating the truth since childhood, retrained the Feilong Cavalry, and mobilized the Jinwu Army. In the battle at the Red Mansion, the worst outcome would have been perishing together with Yin Zhan, but in the end, it cost Old General Ji his life.

Jiang Li could hear the heaviness in Ji Heng's words. Though his expression appeared indifferent, his heart ached over Old General Ji's death. He recounted the past in a calm tone, but Jiang Li could imagine the bitterness of his growth from a naive youth through those years. While other noble youths strived for glorious futures, he had thrown himself into hell. He abandoned his own future to gamble on an uncertain outcome.

He was never sincere, because for someone like him, sincerity was a sin.

The deeper one dwells in darkness, the more their heart yearns for light. The lonelier he was, the more he donned vibrant clothes and listened to lively operas. Walking through bustling scenes, it was as if he couldn’t be cast aside this way. But in truth, his loved ones left one after another, until in the end, he remained utterly alone.

He sighed softly, then turned to Jiang Li with a gentle smile and said, "Now I have nothing left, little girl. Do you regret your choice?"

Jiang Li looked at him.

His gaze was tender, yet Jiang Li felt an overwhelming sorrow. In recent days, schemes had unfolded one after another. Yin Zhan’s matter had reached a temporary conclusion, but now Yin Zhili had emerged as another complication. And then there were the Yin family troops in Qingzhou—how would this battle unfold? Ji Heng must be weary too.

"Who says you have nothing left?" she asked, not waiting for his reply before continuing, "Am I not still here?"

He chuckled softly and said, "You really... haven’t changed a bit from before."

On a spring night many years ago, after listening to her sing an opera, he had known she was a foolish woman. Once she fell in love, she would throw caution to the wind, like a moth drawn to flame. Having already made one mistake, she still dared to love again, bravely offering her heart without reservation.

Her sincerity was simple and unguarded, yet it ensnared him completely, making him willing to surrender everything he had. Thus, he too transformed from a cunning hunter into a gentle beast, content to be tamed by her.

"I hadn’t anticipated this earlier," Ji Heng said. "I only arranged for guards to protect the Jiang residence, but I didn’t expect Yin Zhan to use the Ye family as leverage. I’ve already sent Kong Liu with men to the Ye family. Such a thing won’t happen again."

Jiang Li replied, "It’s not your fault. Yin Zhan is simply too despicable."

To think of such a method—he was, after all, a general. Though all is fair in war, this tactic was neither honorable nor decent.

"I will send you back to the capital as soon as possible. Once you return, I’ll have Kong Liu assign guards to protect you at all times. Try not to leave the residence. As for the Ye family, they can stay at the Duke’s manor," Ji Heng said. "It will be safer there than outside."

Hearing this, Jiang Li sensed something amiss and looked at him, asking, "Aren’t you coming back with me?"

"Yin Zhili has raised troops in Qingzhou. The Yin family has a substantial army, and Yin Zhan has been plotting rebellion for years. I promised the emperor I would lead the Imperial Guards to quell the rebellion. I cannot leave," Ji Heng explained with a faint smile.

"But... you’ve never been on a battlefield before," Jiang Li said anxiously.

He laughed softly. "You don’t trust me, Ali," he said. "Some things leave no room for choice. Only by killing Yin Zhili myself can I find peace. I don’t know how long this war will last, but when I return, I will marry you."

"Ji Heng..."

"You mustn’t marry anyone else," he said, pulling her close and brushing a light kiss on her lips.

"Are you truly decided?" Jiang Li’s heart ached intensely. She didn’t want to be separated from Ji Heng and knew how perilous his journey would be. Yet she also understood that his resolve was firm. If she were in his place, she would do the same—settle this grudge spanning two generations with her own hands. She had no right to sway his decision. To love someone was not to confine them; she respected his choice.

"If I leave you, will you forgive me?" he asked, his voice laced with a smile.Jiang Li smiled and said, "If you promise me that you will definitely come back to marry me, I will forgive you."

Her eyes were bright, sincere and clear. Ji Heng was slightly taken aback, feeling a sense of contentment and gratitude from the bottom of his heart. She effortlessly smoothed away all his brutality and darkness, making him composed.

He replied solemnly, "I promise you."

(End of Chapter)