The Best Thing

Turtle Jelly

In the afternoon, the Traditional Chinese Medicine building was sparsely populated. He Suye crouched in the medicine preparation room, helping the pharmacist brew herbal concoctions.

As a chief physician, he didn’t need to personally handle the brewing, but being a TCM doctor often left him with ample free time. Besides, he loved all kinds of medicinal herbs—watching them bubble in earthen pots, their aromas spreading, bitter yet with a hint of sweetness. The pharmacy had just hired a new assistant who was still inexperienced, unable to gauge the heat properly, constantly needing someone to remind them whether to use high or low flame.

He picked up a prescription—one he had written himself—for Shen Xifan. A name that looked elegant on paper, but when spoken aloud, why did it sound so much like... congee? Serving congee? Her family must be very down-to-earth!

Coptis was bitter, but the other herbs were sweet and mild, so the concoction shouldn’t be too hard to swallow. After finishing a month’s dosage, he could prescribe her a cypress seed porridge or grind some wild jujube seed powder to help with her insomnia.

Still, he wasn’t sure if this girl might develop some other ailment. Meeting three times in two weeks was, admittedly, a bit frequent for a TCM doctor and patient.

But with her, it seemed like surprises and miracles were always around the corner.

Just then, a nurse from the outpatient clinic came looking for him. “Doctor He, Director Liao from the inpatient department is on the phone for you.”

He set down the prescription, instructed the pharmacist to monitor the heat, and headed straight for the inpatient ward.

Director Liao was already waiting in his office and greeted him warmly. “Xiao He, come with me to check on some patients. The sudden drop in temperature has caused quite a few to develop coughs. Benproperine hasn’t been very effective, and I didn’t dare try codeine-based meds. Do you think you could prescribe some Chinese herbal medicine? That’s your specialty, being trained in both Western and traditional medicine!”

He Suye smiled modestly. “I’ll do my best.”

He carefully took pulses and prescribed remedies. Most of these patients were from the gastroenterology department, so their issues were generally stomach or intestinal-related. He avoided overly potent herbs and added some liver-soothing, stomach-warming ingredients as needed.

One patient asked, “Doctor, every time I drink the herbal medicine, I vomit yellow-green stomach fluid. What’s going on?”

He checked the medical record and explained, “The pseudoginseng powder might be a bit irritating, but it’s nothing serious. If it’s uncomfortable, you can ask your attending physician to reduce the dosage from three times a day to two.”

Director Liao leaned over. “Oh, this is Xiao Xu’s patient? Why hasn’t he mentioned this?”

Suddenly, the lights in the ward went out. Winter afternoons were already dark early, and the patients gasped in surprise. A nurse rushed over. “It might be a power outage. The electricity will be back soon!”

Power did return—thanks to the hospital’s backup generator, which only supplied the emergency and inpatient departments. Director Liao kindly suggested, “Xiao He, I’ll have the nurses fetch the medicine tomorrow. Without power, your TCM building won’t be able to see clearly anyway.”

He Suye nodded. “I’ll take the prescriptions over first. If the power comes back, I’ll have them brew and deliver the medicine immediately.”

Director Liao patted his shoulder. “Good idea. And send my regards to your father!”

He Suye nodded, though it occurred to him just how long it had been since he’d last seen his father.

Fortunately, his home still had electricity. Just as He Suye was about to unlock his door, hurried footsteps approached from behind, followed by a familiar voice—weak and pleading. “Senior Brother, be merciful and spare us a meal, won’t you?”

He turned around, surprised. “Li Jie? Fang Kexin? What are you two doing here?”Li Jie grumbled, "The school had a power outage. Senior Brother, you know how pitiful our school is—the old campus doesn’t even have a generator. The cafeteria isn’t serving, and the nearby small restaurants are closed too..."

"So you came here to mooch a meal?" He Suye chuckled. "Come in. There aren’t many dishes at home, so make do with what we have."

Though the dinner was simple, He Suye’s cooking skills were excellent, and they couldn’t stop praising the food as they ate.

Li Jie was He Suye’s junior brother, and their families had been close for generations. He had always regarded He Suye as an elder brother and acted as freely in his home as he would in his own. After finishing the meal, he immediately abandoned his bowl and chopsticks to go play games online. Fang Kexin, however, felt embarrassed. "Senior Brother, sorry for the trouble."

He Suye smiled. "It’s fine. How could I let guests clean up? I’ll wash the dishes."

Left with no choice, Fang Kexin wandered around the house. He Suye’s home was just like him—simple and neat. His study desk was piled with various pharmacopoeias, prescription books, and a half-written thesis. Suddenly, she remembered the last time she had been here—two years ago, when Senior Brother and Senior Sister Zhang Yiling had broken up.

No one knew that four years ago, she had harbored a secret crush on He Suye. Back then, she and Li Jie had been high school classmates, and by coincidence, they had ended up at the same university, naturally becoming good friends. She had constantly heard Li Jie talk about how outstanding this senior brother was—top-tier in academics and an all-around good person, someone he had idolized since childhood and who had always taken the blame for him.

The first time she went out to eat with Li Jie, she saw He Suye smiling as he placed dumplings into Zhang Yiling’s bowl. He didn’t touch his own chopsticks, instead gazing at Zhang Yiling with tender, doting eyes. Almost instantly, she had fallen for He Suye—such a handsome, gentle man. In that moment, she believed in love at first sight.

But what right did she have to interfere? He Suye and Zhang Yiling were the campus’s model couple. Anyone who knew them would sigh and say they were a match made in heaven. All she could do was obediently play the role of a junior sister in front of him, quietly observing his every move, intentionally or unintentionally mimicking Zhang Yiling’s style, and finding excuses to ask him about medical cases—even though he wasn’t studying radiology—just to stay by his side for a little while. She had thought they would get married, have adorable children, and grow old together. But everything had ended abruptly when Zhang Yiling went abroad.

She truly didn’t understand how two people in love could just break up like that, scattering to opposite ends of the earth without a single thread connecting them anymore.

She still remembered what He Suye had said to Zhang Yiling that rainy night, right in front of her and Li Jie: "If you want to leave, then go. But once you leave, don’t regret it. I respect your choice, and I ask you to respect my feelings."

That night, He Suye got drunk for the first time, while Zhang Yiling remained silent, her silence deepening. Fang Kexin had a vague feeling that Zhang Yiling’s decision to go abroad wasn’t as simple as it seemed—but what exactly had happened, she might never know.

After Zhang Yiling left, He Suye disappeared for a long time. Even Li Jie couldn’t find him. Then one day, she saw He Suye step off a bus with a hiking backpack, looking gaunt and exhausted. When she asked, he said he had spent three months doing volunteer medical work in the mountains. His smile was strained, and her heart ached for him. So she redoubled her efforts to be good to him. She didn’t dare dream of replacing Zhang Yiling’s place in his heart—she just wanted him to feel a little better. That was enough.Until one day, He Suye said to her, "Little junior sister, find someone who can treat you well. I... am not worthy."

Only then did she realize that the feelings she thought were so well hidden had been known to He Suye all along. He had been rejecting her in the gentlest ways—overtime, thesis work, being busy—and she had foolishly believed he was truly that occupied.

She finally understood: He Suye was a man of principle. Love was love—one person's love was enough. If it wasn't love, then it wasn't, and he wouldn't cling to temporary warmth. It's just that she could never be that person.

He Suye's home contained many Chinese herbal medicine specimens from the university. Zhang Yiling had particularly loved herbs with "xiang" (fragrance) in their names: clove, patchouli, costus root, fennel, agarwood, aristolochia, benzoin, musk, frankincense. Fang Kexin, who studied medical imaging, couldn't name most herbs but had carefully researched these few.

Being fond of good food, she especially liked fennel (also called huixiang). Star anise was essential for cooking fish and meat, while common fennel could be stir-fried, served cold, or used in dumplings and buns. It could even be combined with clove and cardamom to make exquisite beef.

Though those with yin deficiency and excessive internal heat shouldn't eat too much.

As she stared absently at a packet of fennel, He Suye approached and explained, "Fennel is pungent and sweet—it regulates qi, aids digestion, and dispels cold to relieve pain. Most importantly, it's great in cold dishes and dumplings."

Fang Kexin nodded. "I love eating this. Star anise is very fragrant too—Senior Brother's exquisite beef is absolutely amazing."

He Suye looked somewhat embarrassed. "Mine is quite ordinary. But these spices can be harsh on the body and easily cause internal heat—better to eat less."

She smiled slyly. "Seems today's spicy lamb is quite heat-inducing, no?"

He Suye pointed to the living room. "I specially made some turtle jelly and mung bean soup. Go quick before Li Jie the glutton finishes it all!"

Though just ordinary mung bean soup and turtle jelly, they were refreshingly delicious—perfect after greasy, heavy meals.

While Li Jie focused on eating, Fang Kexin asked, "Senior Brother, how do you make this turtle jelly? Can it be made at home?"

"It's somewhat complicated. You can buy turtle jelly powder for home use, but authentic turtle jelly requires over twenty Chinese herbs like tortoise shell, smilax glabra, atractylodes, sophora flavescens, ligustrum, schizonepeta, rehmannia, and abrus cantoniensis. It nourishes yin, benefits kidneys, moistens dryness, improves skin, eliminates acne, regulates organs, and clears heat toxins."

Li Jie interjected, "Senior Brother, you haven't made this since Senior Sister Zhang Yiling left."

Fang Kexin glared at him. "Just eat properly—don't bring up unnecessary topics!"

He Suye, however, laughed. "It has been a long time, hasn't it? Over a year since Zhang Yiling left?"

Fang Kexin was startled—this was the first time in two years she'd heard He Suye mention Zhang Yiling. She had always considered it his taboo, the deepest wound buried in his heart, never to be shown lightly. Yet now he spoke of her so casually, as if discussing the weather.

After a long pause, Fang Kexin finally responded, "Senior Brother, you... about Senior Sister now..."

"It's been two years," He Suye smiled. "Why make things hard for myself? It was her choice—I must respect that. Besides, she left so resolutely. No matter how much I longed, I couldn't hold her back. So... it's all in the past now."In He Suye's eyes, there was pure serenity—no sorrow, no grief—completely unlike that rainy night two years ago.

He had let go, moved on. But for himself, and for every person in the world trapped in the past, he didn’t know when they would ever be able to let go. And if they couldn’t, how could they ever find happiness in this life?

After finishing their meal, the two bid farewell, and He Suye was left alone, lost in thought as he gazed at the specimens in his study.

These were all things Zhang Yiling had brought back from school, insisting that one had to immerse oneself in the environment to truly master traditional Chinese medicine. She had always been a woman who demanded too much of herself, never allowing failure—top grades, the most unique fashion, and even her boyfriend had to be the best. But was he really the best?

Perhaps because her exam scores were never as high as his, especially in Chinese medicine.

Such a fiercely competitive woman, yet in the end, she chose a path of no return. He still remembered that slightly chilly autumn day when the dean called them both into his office and solemnly said, "There’s one government-sponsored study-abroad slot, and the faculty has unanimously decided it will go to one of you. As for who, you two can discuss it among yourselves."

He knew how difficult it was for someone studying integrated Chinese and Western medicine to go abroad, especially with a focus on traditional Chinese medicine. Then his heart sank, because he saw the longing and yearning in Zhang Yiling’s eyes. He softened immediately—he had always given her the best, and this time would be no exception.

But he miscalculated. He thought Zhang Yiling would come back to discuss it with him, that she would persuade him to give up the opportunity. If she had truly asked him to, he would have accepted it, willingly. He would have let her go—who made him love her so much?

Yet, for three days, she didn’t return. On the fourth day, she stood by his bed and said, "He Suye, I’m leaving. The department has issued the notice—I’m being sent to study in America."

He smiled and congratulated her, though his heart was breaking. Then suddenly, he noticed the bruises on her neck and immediately understood. He grabbed her wrist and shouted, "How did you really get this slot? Tell me!"

Zhang Yiling coldly pushed him away. "I traded myself for it. Happy now? He Suye, I knew that if your grandfather spoke up, the dean would give the slot to you. So I had to act first."

Devastated, what else could he say now? He told her, "If you had just said you wanted the slot, you know I would have given it to you. Why did you have to degrade yourself like this?"

She met his gaze calmly. "I didn’t want to owe you anything. I wanted to leave without any attachments."

"Without any attachments"—what a phrase. All he could ask was, "Zhang Yiling, did you ever love me at all?"

He didn’t get an answer right away, but eventually, he did.

On that rainy night before she left, she said, "Since I was little, I’ve always wanted the best—the best grades, the best clothes. Back then, I told myself I’d have the best boyfriend, the best husband. So, He Suye, I did love you—but I loved you because you were the best. When I go abroad, I’ll meet someone even better. So, I’ll stop loving you."

The truth was laid bare. This fiercely ambitious woman had only ever wanted a man who matched her standards—not He Suye himself.He sighed, gathered his thoughts, and began tidying up the kitchen. Then he opened the fridge to check the ingredients for tomorrow's breakfast. Finding no eggs or bread left, he put on his clothes and prepared to head to the neighborhood supermarket to buy some groceries.