Sheng Xia gazed at his unusually earnest face, "Haven't we been dating all along?"
Zhang Shu looked incredulous: "All along?"
Sheng Xia: "You come over often, don't you?"
Zhang Shu: "And that counts as dating? First time I've seen a girlfriend so easy to please."
"How many girlfriends do you have?" Sheng Xia seized the loophole, muttering under her breath, "No wonder you're so good at kissing..."
Zhang Shu, rarely at a loss for words, broke into a smile after a pause: "Getting clever now, playing with words, are we? How many girlfriends do I have—don't you know? Should we count them? Zhang Shu's girlfriend number one, the exceptionally talented Sheng Xia; Zhang Shu's girlfriend number two, the Disney princess with all the stationery; number three, who was number three again? Ah, number three is the soft and squishy one who's terrified of ghosts..."
Flustered and embarrassed, Sheng Xia reached out to push him.
Zhang Shu staggered, nearly toppling the bicycle, but he laughed unrestrainedly. Suddenly, he caught the flaw in her words too, leaning in with a smirk, "What did you just say? 'Good at kissing'—how do you define 'good at kissing'? Does that mean you like it?"
Caught off guard by the counterattack, Sheng Xia's already unsettled heartbeat grew even more erratic. She turned her face away, "I'm hungry, let's go eat. You can go play with your number two girlfriend!"
With that, she strode ahead on her own.
Zhang Shu followed unhurriedly, leading his bicycle.
"Why number two? How about number three?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"It's not dark yet, no ghosts around."
"...Then what about number one?"
"Number one is hungry."
"Number one's boyfriend, Zhang Shu, is hungry too."
"Fine, number one will take Zhang Shu to eat."
For dinner, they tried a cafeteria they hadn't been to before, then as usual, took a stroll around campus to digest.
The sunset faded quickly, and the streetlights flickered on in an instant, casting fragmented golden shadows of trees onto the shoulders of passersby.
Sheng Xia walked half a step behind Zhang Shu, her hand tightly clasped in his, quietly stepping on his shadow as they moved.
In the quiet, Sheng Xia murmured, "It's like you're the one from Heqing—you know the way better than I do."
Zhang Shu didn't feign modesty: "I definitely know the way better than you."
Sheng Xia: "Oh, the farther we go, the fewer people there are."
What kind of paths are you picking? Who knows what your intentions are?
Zhang Shu stopped and turned around, "I've noticed your eloquence has improved lately?"
Always ready with a retort, layered with implications—resentful, reproachful, or spoiled.
Like a cat's paw swiping at someone.
He liked it.
Sheng Xia replied, "Because number one is exceptionally talented?"
Zhang Shu chuckled silently: "He Yan doesn't have camphor trees either, so how did someone learn to be so cheeky?"
"Oops, must be because proximity to ink turns one black?" Sheng Xia looked up, suppressing a smile.
This was too much to resist. Zhang Shu leaned down as if to kiss her again, clearly ready to make this endless. Thinking she still had questions for him, Sheng Xia decided to take the initiative, standing on tiptoe to plant a quick kiss on his lips.
Zhang Shu, caught off guard, was momentarily stunned.
Seizing his hesitation, she retreated half a step, swinging their clasped hands, "I heard your department is full of geniuses, all very busy."
On the first day of school, he'd made an appearance in front of her roommates, and that night, Dorm 322 held its first late-night chat, with him as the main topic of gossip.
Sheng Xia hadn't been in this academic tier before, so she'd never paid attention to the reputation of his school and program. That night, her roommates filled her in.
His department was nicknamed the "Noble Department." Hard to get into, even harder to graduate from, because it was packed with prodigies—those who didn't succeed went mad.
So why did it seem like Zhang Shu was handling it all so effortlessly?Zhang Shu snapped out of his thoughts, staring at her placating hand. "Are you saying you're tired of me coming around so often?"
What was this?
A fleeting touch to brush him off?
Was he annoying her?
"Of course not!" she said earnestly. "It's just that after meeting with my advisor today, I was wondering—have you already figured out how to spend these four years? I feel like I still don't understand anything."
She was always busy with this and that, yet looking back, she couldn't even tell what she'd been occupied with.
Meanwhile, he always seemed so composed and at ease.
Even though his situation was objectively more overwhelming.
Zhang Shu led her toward the grassy area by the side.
It was dark now, and few people remained on the lawn.
Sheng Xia sat with her knees hugged to her chest, while Zhang Shu leaned back on his hands, his long legs slightly bent in a relaxed posture.
"So what do you think university is about?" he asked, turning his head to tuck a stray lock of hair behind her neck.
Her slender neck gleamed pale in the darkness, its gentle curves disappearing into her collarbones.
Zhang Shu's gaze returned to her profile before he self-consciously rubbed the tip of his nose.
Sheng Xia looked at the scattered lights from the library across the lake and answered, "'The way of great learning lies in illuminating bright virtue, in renovating the people, and in resting in the highest excellence.' Though that 'great learning' isn't quite the same as this university, it's ultimately about adult learning. It should be different from high school."
Zhang Shu nodded. "Mhm. And then?"
Sheng Xia continued, "But I still just follow the class schedule to attend lectures and read whatever the professors assign. Isn't that the same high school routine? I vaguely feel this isn't enough, but I don't know where to start..."
She also turned her head, meeting Zhang Shu's gaze. "I'm a bit lost."
Yes, lost. That word effortlessly summarized her current state.
Especially after meeting her advisor.
She repeated Tan Gong's words to Zhang Shu almost verbatim.
"The professor said this major is different—understand where it comes from, where it's headed, how to study it. Figure it out from the very beginning. Don't idle, but don't waste time either... What was he trying to say?"
Zhang Shu asked, "Why didn't you just ask him directly then?"
"Because other students were there too. He wasn't speaking just to me. I think he wanted everyone to interpret it in their own way?"
Zhang Shu ruffled her hair. "At least you're getting lost at the right time."
As she sat stunned, he tilted sideways and rested his head on her lap, looking up at her.
His head was quite heavy, a solid weight against her thighs. Sheng Xia shifted slightly, uncomfortable, but he seemed oblivious as he continued naturally, "I don't know much about your field specifically, but there are commonalities."
"Our department keeps busy. Many students came through informatics competitions—for them, first-year core courses are just formalities, while I'm studying what they consider trivial. By junior year, it might become even more obvious. For many, the textbooks are even outdated. Plenty of non-competition students get outperformed all the way until graduation. Disparity, frustration, confusion—everyone experiences it. No need to stress."
As he spoke, his head kept shifting slightly, the back of his skull brushing against her thighs.
Sheng Xia leaned back awkwardly, avoiding his gaze as she replied, "But you're the top scorer, the freshman representative who gave the speech in front of everyone."
Someone as remarkable as him—could he feel lost too?
"That was partly due to social influence at the time. Academically, I wasn't the most outstanding," Zhang Shu said matter-of-factly, as if not really evaluating himself. "Besides, the beginning doesn't equal the end. At Haiyan, who doesn't have a few top scorers around them? It doesn't signify much."He turned his head to look at her...
Sheng Xia felt her legs go numb, her body as if electrified.
"Perhaps this is what your advisor meant—where you come from and where you're going? Figure out what you were like when you arrived and what you aim to do. Don't idle around, nor take the wrong path and waste time."
His voice pulled her attention back.
Sheng Xia finally lowered her gaze to meet his eyes.
The young man's eyes remained bright even in the darkness.
Some people were like that—when they looked at you while speaking, you felt as if targeted by a sniper, compelled to believe unconditionally.
Sheng Xia suddenly recalled her first failed monthly exam in senior year. Back then, he had done the same—starting with himself, putting himself in her shoes, reasoning by analogy, and guiding her path.
He had looked at her like this then too.
The fiery passion of youth and the sober clarity of adulthood blended seamlessly within him.
A thought arose in her heart—what had she done to deserve this?
"So, A-Shu, what do you plan to do?"
Zhang Shu hooked a stray lock of her hair, twirling it around his fingers as he pondered.
Because this was a question he hadn't yet figured out himself. What to do? Arriving at a new platform, realizing past advantages were mere illusions, not even qualifying as stepping stones. So what should he do?
"Find your own track."
Zhang Shu suddenly said solemnly.
In answering her, Zhang Shu had an epiphany in that instant.
The path in high school was straightforward—study hard, read countless books.
But university was different. More important than reading was finding your own track, reading the right books.
His track might not lie in coding—at least, not solely in coding. On this track, others' starting lines were too high, their backs impossible to catch up to. Why fixate on a single plot of land?
Find your own track...
Sheng Xia silently repeated the phrase, deep in thought, when suddenly she felt an arm around her neck pulling her down. The next second, warm lips pressed against hers.
Zhang Shu tilted his head up and kissed her fiercely before releasing her, his head falling back onto her lap. "Tell me, aren't you a treasure?"
Sheng Xia stared blankly at his radiant smile.
Zhang Shu sat up and ruffled her hair. "Don't overthink it. You pushed yourself too hard in senior year. It's normal to feel lost when suddenly stopping. People don't need to have goals at every stage—just stay on the right overall path. Didn't I say it before? Sheng Xia can forever do only what she loves. If you love writing books, then write books. If you love research, then write papers. Doing what you love to the extreme—isn't that the most impressive?"
As for the worldly things requiring competition, pursuit, and sprinting to obtain...
He would handle those.
Sheng Xia gazed at him and nodded.
She felt his head drawing nearer.
"It's dark..." he murmured, his voice low and close, breath fanning across her face.
Sheng Xia instinctively leaned back, confused. "Huh?"
Suddenly, her head was cupped, and her lips were kissed again. He smirked. "It's dark. I'm checking if No. 3 is back yet..."
No. 3.
"No. 3 is..." Sheng Xia mumbled absently. "Mmph!"
He cradled her face in both hands, tilting his head to deepen the kiss.
Caught off guard, Sheng Xia toppled backward. Instead of catching her waist, he followed her down, pinning her to the grass as he kissed her thoroughly.
A heavy imprint, then a slow release. When his tongue slipped in, lightly grazing the corner of her mouth, Sheng Xia shivered, a soft moan escaping her lips. "Mmm..."
Zhang Shu's body tensed too. Propping himself up, he gazed at her dazedly.Sheng Xia crashed into his gaze, darker than the night itself.
Her black hair spilled across the ground, her eyes cradling pools of clear spring water. Her overly fair skin held a fragile beauty in the darkness.
"Damn it..." Zhang Shu sighed, his deep kiss searing into her once more.
They had no idea how long they'd been kissing.
She knew he loved kissing—most of their time together was spent like this.
But Sheng Xia hadn’t known such a simple act could be so endlessly intoxicating.
The wild-growing grass pricked the back of her head with tiny, persistent jabs, while in front of her, a relentless storm of kisses overwhelmed every one of her senses.
Suddenly, he caught her tongue and sucked hard.
Sheng Xia’s tongue went numb!
Her entire body felt like it was being roasted over a fire, tensing so much that her toes curled involuntarily.
Just as she was about to push him away, his lips left hers.
Her chin, her neck…
Pain!
The sharp sting beneath her collarbone forced Sheng Xia’s eyes open. Weakly, she touched his head. "A-Shu..."
Zhang Shu reluctantly propped himself up, his breathing uneven as he gazed down at her.
At her slightly swollen lower lip. At the small crimson mark beneath her collarbone.
His eyes slowly lifted, meeting her dazed ones again, and he couldn’t resist stealing another kiss.
"Mmm, number three is soft as cotton."
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