Sniper Butterfly

Over the past half year, a scene would occasionally flash through Li Wu's mind.

It was that afternoon during the summer after graduating high school when he confessed his feelings to Cen Jin. The woman had asked him:

"What if I never actually got divorced? What would you do then?"

His response at the time was: "I would continue to silently like you. I wouldn't get a girlfriend, wouldn't get married. I'd only like you until the day I die, but I wouldn't disturb you."

He had confidently believed that nearly two years of high school had completely accustomed him to this hidden affection. So when she met someone who could make her happier, someone more suitable and compatible, he would keep his promise - suppress himself again, retreat to the shadows of her life, and return to his previous state.

From beginning to end, he only ever had one option: to like her. If forced to distinguish between black and white, it could only be loud affection versus silent affection. But she was different - she could have options A, B, C, D, or even more.

That's why he didn't dare ask too many questions. He wasn't qualified. He had once been her material burden - should he now become her emotional burden too?

What he feared even more was discovering the worst possible outcome.

Holding onto hope, he constantly comforted himself: what if she was just being ambiguous? What if she and that person had separated? What if he still had a chance?

But he had overestimated himself. After actually making this choice, every day became torment. Dignity and wretchedness wrestled within him daily. He desperately longed for Cen Jin to turn back to him - not with the tone of an elder, but with the needs between a man and a woman. He imagined moments when he could gather the courage to embrace her, even if she was already in some forbidden relationship - perhaps while studying together in the library, or when she was running vigorously on the sports field, or lying alone in bed during the quiet night. These transgressive fantasies would uncontrollably surface. In those seconds, he would feel dazed, detached, greedy, agitated, heartbroken.

His mind struggled violently before finally settling into dead silence.

After months of this cycle between stagnant water and turbulent currents repeating itself, Li Wu finally faced his own final judgment.

Though calling it a judgment might be an overstatement, since it appeared indisputable.

It was more like a notification, announcing their complete liberation - it didn't even require him to utter a single word of appeal.

That kite string had been completely severed.

Throughout this half year, he had been drifting absentmindedly behind the clouds, cautiously watching the people on the ground, not daring to dive down recklessly.

He was free.

But the moment he saw the text message, Li Wu's heart felt as if it had been shot through. Excruciating pain immediately surged through his limbs and internal organs. He could barely stand, his mind in chaos as he collapsed onto a chair.

A senior sister noticed his pale complexion and asked with concern, "Li Wu, what's wrong?" Are you feeling unwell?"

The young man took deep breaths, shook his head saying "I'm fine," then clasped his hands together, twisting them until his knuckles turned white and made faint cracking sounds.

As instruments hummed softly, Li Wu stared at the computer screen and realized he could no longer focus on analyzing data.

He abruptly stood up, glanced at the few people present, said "Sorry, I need to step out," and headed for the door.

Just after crossing the threshold, the young man realized he was still wearing gloves. He hurried back to remove them before running out into the corridor again.He raced all the way to the school gate, hailed a taxi, his face flushed red from the sun, his T-shirt soaked through with sweat.

Along the way, he frantically dialed Cen Jin’s number over and over again, but it was always switched off. It felt like that night back in high school when Cen Jin didn’t come home—he was frantic, disoriented, and utterly tormented.

―

After sending that message to Li Wu, Cen Jin turned off her phone. She had taken two days off, solely to wholeheartedly welcome her thirtieth birthday.

She refused her parents’ offer to throw a grand celebration and instead invited Chun Chang to go wild with her at Disneyland.

Two thirty-year-old women, dressed in puff skirts, looked like two carefree princesses.

They tried on all sorts of adorable headbands, hopping and skipping around, eating and drinking, weaving through one fairy-tale world after another. They struck playful, silly poses in front of the castle for photos, laughing loudly, running fast, never seeming to tire.

After watching the fireworks and leaving the park in the evening, they changed into revealing dresses in the car and headed to the most expensive nightclub in Yishi to dance.

After a few drinks, Cen Jin pulled Chun Chang into the kaleidoscopic dance floor. The women swayed and glided through the restless crowd, sleek and alluring, like elusive, glowing jellyfish.

They partied until nearly two in the morning.

This birthday eve was exhilarating and fulfilling. Cen Jin, dizzy with excitement and her face flushed from the alcohol, headed home.

The taxi dropped her off at the entrance of her residential complex. The woman in the spaghetti-strap dress grabbed her purse and paper bag, got out of the car, and walked unsteadily toward her home.

Her skin was snow-white, and as she moved, her skirt flowed like liquid mercury over her body, like a phantom of the night.

The surroundings were quiet, filled only with the chirping of insects and the shadows of flowers.

After enduring the intense noise all evening, Cen Jin somewhat savored the tranquility of the moment, squinting contentedly.

Humming a tuneless melody, she walked home with a smile.

As she neared her building, Cen Jin’s smile froze. In the darkness, she saw a tall, slender figure standing at the foot of the stairwell steps. He wasn’t leaning on anything; he might have been waiting for a long time, his entire body radiating a numb weariness.

But his eyes were still calm, without a trace of impatience or fatigue—like an icy plain, like a starry lake.

As their eyes met, the warm summer breeze lifted the hem of her dress and ruffled the boy’s hair.

Her good mood vanished instantly. Cen Jin averted her gaze and walked straight toward the stairwell without a sideways glance.

Her steps were no longer light; the sharp taps of her red-soled stilettos were urgent and clear.

As if she didn’t know him, Cen Jin brushed past him without acknowledgment.

Just as she unlocked the stairwell door, a low call came from behind: “Sister.”

Those two words were like a brief Binding Curse. Cen Jin involuntarily paused for a moment, then frowned slightly, pulled the door open, and hurried inside.

“Sister,” he called again, his voice louder this time, hoarse and tinged with undeniable despair.

Cen Jin’s heart jolted violently. She stopped in front of the elevator and pressed the up button twice forcefully.

The elevator doors slid open immediately. Cen Jin only wanted to return to her safe haven as quickly as possible, unwilling to make eye contact or engage with this person any further.

Even as she ignored him, the boy quickly followed, slipping into the elevator with her.

Cen Jin’s expression darkened, as if she had erected an impenetrable shield. Still, she acted as if Li Wu were invisible, staring fixedly at the slowly closing elevator doors.

They stood side by side in the elevator, yet not a sound passed between them.

The woman was impeccably made up, radiant and elegant, while the boy, after waiting for over ten hours, had a layer of salt stains on his black T-shirt.Seeing her remain motionless, Li Wu stepped forward, pressed the familiar floor button, then retreated to her side.

When they reached the floor, Cen Jin walked out again, followed closely by the nearly synchronized footsteps of the boy behind her.

The dimly lit corridor suddenly felt exceptionally long, as if haunted by some evil presence. Cen Jin only wanted to shake him off as quickly as possible. Gripping the shopping bag handles tightly, she walked faster and faster.

Just then, the boy chasing after her spoke again, his voice unusually clear in the quiet night: "Don’t you want to hear my answer?"

Cen Jin halted abruptly but didn’t turn around, coldly tossing back five words: "Are you qualified?"

The boy’s tone remained unchanged: "Why wouldn’t I be qualified? These are the rules you set."

The woman laughed, her fair shoulders shrugging slightly: "The one who breached the contract first has long since defaulted and forfeited the game."

She continued walking.

Li Wu watched her retreating figure and inexplicably recalled the second time he had seen her. She had walked ahead just like this, slender and aloof as a white lotus.

He hadn’t dared to approach her then.

Could he have ever imagined that the path to pursuing her would be this difficult, this painful, and this bitter?

His heart felt as if it were being torn apart bit by bit: "How did I breach the contract? Wasn’t it you who breached it first?"

These words thoroughly infuriated Cen Jin. She turned around, pointed at herself, and lifted her chin arrogantly: "Are you playing the hypocrite? You know very well how you’ve treated me these past few months."

The stinging memory from the end of the year was still vivid in his mind. Li Wu’s breathing grew heavy, his eyes reddening, but he didn’t know how to respond.

Cen Jin couldn’t stand his moist eyes, brimming with profound emotion, which pierced her chest with waves of pain.

Stop pretending to be so sentimental.

She scoffed in disdain, left him behind, and continued toward her home. As she stopped in front of the door and was about to unlock it, her wrist was suddenly seized. She tried to shake it off forcefully but couldn’t break free, forcing her to turn around once more.

His grip hurt her skin, and her face flushed red with anger. She could only glare at him, warning furiously: "Let go."

The boy seemed not to hear, his tall and imposing frame looming over her as if he could press her directly into the recessed door panel. His jaw was tight, his brows dark and heavy: "On the night before New Year’s Day, right in front of your company, I saw you walking with a man and hugging him intimately."

He emphasized the last four words heavily, then released his grip, nearly shouting: "Who breached the contract first?"

Cen Jin was stunned. After a few seconds of recollection, she vaguely remembered. Rubbing her reddened wrist, she curled her lips scornfully: "That’s my supervisor, and also my friend."

"He likes men."

"What’s wrong with me hugging him?"

She shook her bag violently and tilted her head to look directly at him: "Should I call him right now to confirm?"

Li Wu was instantly speechless, the hostility around him vanishing without a trace. His eyes, which had just returned to normal, reddened intensely again. Overwhelming regret and pain, like a tsunami or a hurricane, swallowed him whole. He felt as if something were stuck in his throat, nearly suffocating him.

Cen Jin’s nose also tingled slightly. So that was it.

Everything finally fell into place. The shards of glass that had wounded and worn her down for months finally pieced together into a complete picture. She had been anxious and insecure all this time because of such a ridiculous reason.Isn't it ironic? Cen Jin let out a cold laugh, rubbing the back of her hand against her head as if desperately trying to divert emotions and thoughts her mind could no longer sustain. She fixed her sharp gaze back on him, unwavering: "Just because of this? You've treated me like this for so long? Li Wu, this is exactly why I say you're not qualified. I'm the only one who truly upheld the spirit of our agreement from start to finish, while you didn't even dare to ask and instead retaliated with cold violence. Just like when you chose your school—self-righteous, immature, and impulsive. Someone like you deserves to demand an answer from me?"

Li Wu stared at her intensely: "Then did you ever ask me? Did you ever care about my feelings and changes?"

Though Cen Jin was much shorter than him, her presence was undiminished. She declared firmly: "Why should I ask you? You were the one who strayed first, just like my ex-husband. I have nothing to say except that I'm utterly disappointed in you."

She desperately swallowed back the sob rising from her pain, striving to keep her face expressionless: "Our one-year agreement has ended. Today is my birthday, and my good mood was completely ruined the moment I saw you. I don't want to see you anymore. Let's end it here. Don't come looking for me again."

The boy's vibrant, lively eyes gradually clouded with sorrow, dimming and withering under the woman's words, losing their vitality.

His chest, after heaving violently, slowly stilled, like the EKG of a dying person nearing its peak before flatlining into complete insensibility.

He stood silently for a moment, then suddenly began frantically searching his pants pockets. He pulled out a delicate, unopened gift box that had remained sealed for eight months, stiffly holding it out as he said rigidly: "Happy birthday, sister."

The corner of Cen Jin's mouth twitched slightly. She took it with one hand and smiled faintly: "Thank you."

Li Wu said nothing more. After a brief pause, he turned and walked in the opposite direction, his legs heavy as if weighed down by lead.

Cen Jin thudded against the door, allowing her tears to flow freely. She watched the boy's receding back for a while, then lowered her gaze to the pink box in her hand, gave a slight tug at her lips, and tossed it back into her bag.

A few seconds later, the unsteady-footed boy suddenly halted. In an instant, as if his soul had returned to his body, he strode back with purpose.

He stopped before the woman, his shadow falling directly over her, his eyes fixed intently on her.

Cen Jin grew uncomfortable under his stare and was about to question him when the boy cupped her face with both hands and leaned in without hesitation.

Their lips pressed tightly together.

Cen Jin's pupils contracted sharply, her mind exploding with a surge of heat. Before she could push him away, Li Wu had already released her—he had only kissed her once.

A tingling sensation, electric and fleeting, shot up her spine and spread throughout her body. Every pore of Cen Jin's skin trembled as she stared back at him in disbelief.

Her chest rising and falling, she strained to steady her voice, maintaining an appearance of complete calm: "What does this mean? Another birthday gift?"

"Remember what I asked you last year? What would happen if I kissed you?" Li Wu breathed heavily, as if angry with someone—perhaps himself—veins bulging in his agitation: "I regret it to death. Why did I wait a year? I should have kissed you last year, no matter what the fucking consequences were!"His eyes were rimmed red, his voice trembling nearly to the point of hoarseness: "I like you, Cen Jin. I still like you now, and I have to tell you. I've been waiting for this day all year. Even if it weren't just a year, my answer would be the same for my whole life. I'll like you until I die, only you. No matter if you like me or not, even if you never want to see me again..."

Before he could finish, there was a clatter as the shopping bag hit the floor. The woman's slender, pale arms had already wrapped around the back of his neck, pulling his entire upper body down.

The boy's hot breath washed over her, along with his soft lips, his stunned gaze, his flushed ears, his purity, his passion, and every scent that clung to him—she didn't want to let any of it slip away again.

Last summer, he had planted a seed in her thoughts. It was the soil in her heart that was too soft, her emotions too fertile, that allowed it to grow wildly, beyond control.

So what?

Today, right now, from this moment on—whether it was right or wrong, sweet or poisonous—she was going to pick and savor the fruit she had cultivated with her own hands.