"Alright, lock the door properly after you get home. Don't open it if strangers knock. Also, if anything happens, call me immediately. Your mother is quite far away, so it would be more convenient for me to come over."
Just as he was about to get in the car, Zuo Si'an suddenly said, "Would you like to have dinner?" Seeing Gao Xiang's surprised expression, she added somewhat awkwardly, "This restaurant makes good dishes. My mom ordered portions for me and Xiao Chao, but I didn't ask him to come today. If you don't eat, it'll just go to waste."
He could tell she wanted to make up for her earlier rudeness and couldn't help but smile. "That's a convincing reason for treating someone. Alright, I happen to be hungry anyway."
Gao Xiang followed Zuo Si'an into the building entrance. She said, "Wait a moment, let me check the mailbox."
He held the plastic bag for her while she took out her keys to open the mailbox, indeed retrieving a letter. He casually asked, "From your father?"
She shook her head. "It's from Jingjing. We've been writing to each other regularly."
As she climbed the stairs, she opened the envelope, scattering numerous tiny yellow flowers. The hallway was immediately filled with a faint sweet fragrance. Gao Xiang was amused by the young girl's delicate thoughtfulness. "Has the osmanthus tree in Jingjing's courtyard bloomed?"
"Yeah." She carefully sniffed the inside of the envelope, her expression turning somewhat wistful. "Jingjing said that tree was planted by her great-grandfather when he was a child. When it blooms, at least half the village can smell its fragrance. Even dreams at night become sweet. That feeling must be wonderful."
When they reached the third floor, she had just opened the door when they heard the phone ringing. She hurried to answer it. "Yes, Mom, I just got home." "I've already brought dinner back, it's freshly made." "Okay, I understand."
After hanging up, she went to the kitchen to get utensils. During his previous visit, Gao Xiang hadn't had time to look around carefully. He glanced around—it was a tidy three-bedroom apartment. Compared to Zuo Xuejun's simple residence in Qinggang, the decoration here wasn't particularly elaborate or thoughtful, but it had a homely atmosphere and was kept neat and orderly.
Just then, the phone rang again. She rushed out to answer it, frowning after hearing just one sentence. She replied in a flat tone, "Yes, I'm already home." "No need." "I didn't say anything to him." "Xiao Chao, go do your homework. Don't worry about me." She hung up abruptly and sat on the sofa, looking utterly dejected.
"He's concerned about you."
"I know, but he shouldn't have come to study at the High School Affiliated to Normal University. His grades were excellent—Qinggang High School had already promised him a recommendation and waived his tuition fees. But he still decided to apply to the High School Affiliated to Normal University. His father got so angry he beat him until he was bleeding. His mother called my home repeatedly, crying and begging me to persuade him to change his mind. I... really tried to persuade him, even saying things like I didn't want to see him again, but he simply wouldn't listen and still took the exam to come here."Gao Xiang was taken aback, but after a moment's thought, he understood. Qinggang High School had college entrance exam acceptance rates comparable to Normal University Affiliated High School. As a native of Qinggang, it made perfect sense for Liu Guanchao to continue studying there, and it would be much less burdensome for his impoverished family. The provincial capital had a higher cost of living—just considering expenses alone, Liu Guanchao's family wouldn't support his choice to attend Normal University Affiliated High School. Moreover, he had clearly made this decision for Zuo Si'an, which made it even less likely for his family to understand. It took considerable courage for a fifteen- or sixteen-year-old boy to do this, but instead of persuading him, his family had directly called Zuo Si'an, shifting the pressure onto another child and making her bear the guilt. This angered Gao Xiang.
He said softly, "You've advised him—you've done your duty as a friend. If he insists on his choice, it's no longer your concern."
"No, I didn't advise him against studying here for his sake. I... genuinely didn't want to see him."
"Why?" She opened her mouth but couldn't speak. He waved his hand dismissively. "Forget it. Just remember, no matter what his family says, the choice was his. You owe him nothing."
"The problem now is, he probably thinks he owes me. That day... his sister invited me to watch a movie with him. Later, she asked him to go back to the dormitory with her to get something and told me to wait for them behind her school..."
Zuo Si'an stopped, but Gao Xiang already knew what had happened next, his heart tightening. The room fell silent except for the monotonous, oppressive ticking of the wall clock.
After a long while, she spoke again, her tone flat. "It really had nothing to do with him, but he kept blaming himself. In Qinggang, he accompanied me every day, rode his bike back to Liu Wan to tutor me—he'd already done more than enough. Now he's come here to study against his family's wishes. As soon as my mom mentioned a business trip, he skipped evening self-study to walk me home. I really don't need him helping me endlessly like this. Sometimes I can't help but lose my temper, wishing I could just tell him to stop bothering me. I know I'm being... ungrateful to him."
"You should talk to him and tell him directly how you feel."
"I did. He wouldn't listen. Instead, he thought I was trying not to burden him. Whether I like it or not, I've become this pitiful creature who has to accept help. No one cares about my feelings—not even my mom—everyone's desperately pitying me and trying to compensate me."
Gao Xiang was somewhat surprised. "You shouldn't think that way."
"I can't help it," she blurted out, then shook her head. "My mom has told me the same—that thinking like this is being difficult with others and with myself, a wrong kind of self-suggestion that's meaningless. She's right. I'll try to control it."
She seemed to regain her composure instantly, but Gao Xiang couldn't pretend nothing had happened. "No, Xiao An. Your mom makes a valid point, but you have the right to express your emotions. Like just now, when I asked too many questions and you were upset, I completely understand. You don't need to apologize to anyone."
She remained silent for a long time, tears suddenly welling in her eyes. She immediately lowered her eyelids and whispered, "Actually, I'm really scared."
"Scared of what?""I'm afraid you'll pity me first, and then you'll resent me," her voice grew even softer. "No one will treat me normally."
Gao Xiang was once again struck by the girl's sensitivity. Liu Guanchao's devotion to Zuo Si'an had indeed exceeded the bounds of normal friendship. The Liu family couldn't possibly understand it, and she felt overwhelmed by it too. And wasn't he also trying hard to make it up to her? Of course, they were largely motivated by pity, striving to restore normalcy to her life. But the repercussions of sin were far more enduring and profound than ordinary people could imagine. Once they realized that no one could ultimately play God and save her, would they choose to escape? Her father's departure for Tibet was the best example. No wonder she harbored such intense insecurity.
His silence made Zuo Si'an withdraw. She stood up: "Let's eat, or the food will get cold."
"Xiao An, if something's bothering you, don't keep it to yourself. It's fine to talk to me. I'm willing to listen."
She curled her lips into an expression that was both indifferent and resigned, shaking her head decisively: "No, I promised my mother I wouldn't mention this to anyone. Even though you've always known and are willing to listen, I can't keep dragging you into my troubles. Complaining too much turns one into Xianglin's wife—even I would grow to resent myself."
She went straight into the kitchen, staying there for a few minutes before emerging, completely composed again. She methodically set the table, invited him to sit, and served him rice. After the meal, when he offered to help clear the dishes into the kitchen, she said: "I'll handle it. If you have things to do, you can go. Just close the door on your way out."
Suddenly, he asked her: "Do you have much homework today?"
"Not too bad, not too much."
"Then I'll take you somewhere."
She looked at him in surprise: "Where to?"
"Don't ask. It's not far. I'll have you back in at most two hours."
"But..." She hesitated, then said, "Sister Ruodi would be unhappy if she knew."
He didn't know whether to laugh or cry, silently admitting that Sun Ruodi would indeed not be pleased if she found out. "That's not something you need to worry about. Think carefully before you answer me: would you rather shut yourself in the room doing homework alone, or come out with me to relax a bit?"
Her face showed an internal struggle. He waited patiently until she finally nodded.
Gao Xiang took Zuo Si'an to his car and drove straight to the university he had attended. Entering through the west gate, they walked for a while before she suddenly stopped and whispered, "There are osmanthus flowers here too."
"Yes."
Under the dim yellow streetlights, the air was subtly perfumed with the delicate fragrance of osmanthus, swirling around them, unmistakably announcing their presence and bloom. He pointed not far away and said, "That's the dormitory I used to live in, so I roughly know what it's like to smell the flowers even in sleep. It actually feels like dreaming of eating the osmanthus cakes Aunt Mei makes."
She smiled silently in the darkness, revealing her white, finely aligned teeth: "Mm, freshly steamed Sweet Osmanthus Cake with Brown Sugar is delicious." After a pause, she said, "Thank you."
"Don't mention it. I happened to want to visit the campus too."
"You and Sister Ruodi were classmates, right?""Right, but we were in different majors. She was one year below me, and her dorm was in that direction. I used to wait for her by the bulletin board over there."
Students kept passing by them—some chatting and laughing in small groups, others whispering intimately in pairs—creating a relaxed and leisurely atmosphere.
"My dad and mom were classmates in university. They got married a year after graduation, and then they had me." She lifted her face to gaze into the distance, seeming momentarily distracted, but quickly regained her focus and asked him, "Is university life really enjoyable?"
He thought for a moment and answered truthfully, "It's much more relaxed than high school. There aren't massive amounts of repetitive exercises to do, no pressure from college entrance exams. You get to meet classmates from different places, have the chance to learn more interesting things, and try making decisions for yourself. You might even fall in love with someone."
"Do you love Sister Ruodi?"
He smiled. "If I didn't love her, there'd be no point in being together."
"Yeah, I think so too. The most important thing is being together." Not knowing if she was thinking of her parents again, he was about to speak when she added, "And not arguing."
Her crescent-shaped eyes looked at him with a hint of mischievous laughter, making him chuckle too. "I agree."
6_
Gao Xiang's attempts to explain things to Sun Ruodi weren't going smoothly—she wouldn't even answer his calls. When he had flowers delivered to her office, there was no response. Feeling somewhat helpless, he then received work arrangements from his father about expanding sales channels in the neighboring province. He had no choice but to pack his bags and go on a business trip, returning only after two weeks of constant travel.
The moment he entered home, he was genuinely surprised to find Sun Ruodi and Chen Zihui sitting in the living room, chatting and laughing. "Where's Bao Bao?"
"In the room, asleep," Chen Zihui stood up. "I'll go check the kitchen. Yujiao is very diligent, but she doesn't know how to cook many dishes. I still need to teach her more."
Gao Xiang put down his luggage and first went to his mother's bedroom to check on Bao Bao. Beside the small wooden bed sat a girl flipping through a picture book. When their eyes met, Gao Xiang immediately recognized her as Liu Yaqin and was greatly astonished.
This time, Liu Yaqin was dressed quite simply, her hair pinned back with a clip and wearing no makeup. She said softly, "Bao Bao is very well-behaved. He fell asleep right after drinking milk."
"Are you the new nanny?"
She shook her head. "My mom is the nanny here. I came today to see her about something and helped look after Bao Bao while I'm here."
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