Sea of No Return

"Whаt is Your Highnеss mоst аfrаid оf?"

"Losing."

It was a lоng timе beforе she stoрреd сrуing, stаnding alonе with endless mountains behind her.

"If it wаs dеstined tо be lоst frоm thе vеry bеginning, whу lеt mе tаste thе flavor of роssessiоn?" she said. "Thе so-cаlled Prinсеss Rоуаl is mеrеly a suреrficiаl glоrу. In truth, I am а prisоnеr; even соming to Хiangshan requirеs The Emреrоr's aрproval. Аll оf уou, whо sреаk оf рrotесting me, сould tаke my lifе at аnу mоment if Тhе Еmрeror gives thе order. I resent this identitу now—why was I bоrn into an imрeriаl fаmily? I wоuld rather be an ordinary commoner. Even if it meant never meeting the Prince of Nanyuan, I would not regret it. I always feel Heaven is unfair to me; if it makes you happy today, it will surely make you cry tomorrow. In the end, having nothing... I truly fear that."

Jinshi slightly turned his face away; the last rays of the setting sun fell upon his shoulder, casting half his face in light and half in shadow. Hearing her speak of her origins, he slowly shook his head. "Everyone alive has their own hardships. Does Your Highness think that being an ordinary commoner means being free from such troubles? Has Your Highness heard of the Sky-facing Maiden households?"

She knew of the Sky-facing Maiden households. Great Ye had long upheld the custom of burial sacrifices. When an emperor passed away, dozens of palace maidens would be selected to sacrifice themselves, and their families were then called Sky-facing Maiden households. Back then, Yin Lou nearly became a sacrificial victim but was later rescued by Xiao Duo and returned to Hangzhou. Grand Tutor Bu had blamed her for not dying, as she could not earn honors for the family. Compared to those girls of humble origins who struggled to survive in the palace, she indeed could not claim to have suffered more.

"Dragons ascend to the guest of honor, first bestowed with titles; pitiful are the maiden households, all facing the sky." Jinshi gave a faint, bitter smile. "I was born into a minor official's family. My father was an inspector in the Secretariat, a mere seventh-rank petty official. By rights, I should never have become a Silk-clad Guard Thousand Household Commander. But I had a younger sister. In the ninth year of Longhua, she entered the palace as a noble lady. Last year, when The Late Emperor passed away, my sister was ordered to sacrifice herself. To reward loyalty and bravery, the imperial court promoted me exceptionally. In other words, my official position was bought with my sister's life. My sister was only eighteen when she left. She never had a good life. At a flower-like age, she was forced to hang herself. Her posthumous glory was merely a nameplate in the Ancestral Hall, allowing her to share in the offerings when The Late Emperor was worshipped..."

Wanwan had not expected him to be from a Sky-facing Maiden household. As he spoke, she felt a twinge of fear, afraid he might harbor resentment and do something rash.

She shrank back slightly. Seeing this, he actually smiled. "Your Highness need not fear. If I wanted revenge, I would not have offered assistance earlier. Though I may be dull, I know the root of this evil does not lie with Your Highness, nor can I target anyone with the surname Murong. I only wish to tell Your Highness that if we compare suffering, there are many more pitiable people in this world, and Your Highness is certainly not the most unfortunate. Even if, by the remotest chance, you were to lose the Imperial Consort, you still have your child. As long as the child lives, you have hope."

Wanwan stood motionless. His words gave her much to ponder, yet perhaps he could not understand this torment of a dull knife slowly cutting flesh. "In truth, I would rather die than live like this now. My happiness was so brief; from now on, I can only live for the child. Why?""Because you are the Princess Royal of Great Ye, the Emperor's own sister. The Emperor may execute anyone at a word, but he will never do so to you. So as long as you take care of yourself, you need not concern yourself with the bloody storms of the imperial court. Focus on raising your little heir well, and there is still hope for you to reunite with the Imperial Consort."

Wanwan stared blankly at him as his face gradually faded into the darkness. In the distance, Tong Huan's voice called out. She steadied herself and said, "Thank you—thank you for saving me earlier, and thank you for speaking so much with me. About your sister's matter, I feel deeply sorry. I have never approved of burying the living with the dead. I hope that one day, the Emperor will abolish this cruel practice and no longer let young girls die unjustly."

She turned and walked toward Jianxinzhai. The servant girl at the end of the corridor spotted her and came forward to support her. Mistress and servant slowly walked away, while Jinshi remained standing there, unmoving for a long time.

Upon returning to her bedroom, Wanwan was still shaken by the earlier incident. Though she hadn't fallen, her muscles and tendons had been strained, and she dared not apply medicinal oil carelessly. She asked Tong Huan to bring a towel for a hot compress.

She removed her outer robe, revealing a round, protruding belly. Xiao You, holding a copper basin, observed, "Your belly is so large for five months, Your Highness. Could you be carrying twins?"

Tong Huan also looked at her eagerly. Wanwan replied, "No, twins aren't something one can simply wish for—it requires virtue from one's ancestors. I don't hope for such a thing. The first pregnancy is already difficult enough; raising two would be terrifying!"

As soon as she finished speaking, she felt a wriggling movement in her belly. Looking down, she saw a spasm-like twitch on the left side, followed by a sudden bulge that quickly subsided. She asked in surprise, "Did you see that? Was that the baby moving?"

The three of them were both astonished and excited. Wanwan finally felt that what she carried inside was a living being, connected to her by blood. She sighed, "If only Liangshi were here, he would surely be overjoyed too."

It was a regret, after all—he wasn't present for the baby's first movements. The novelty of becoming parents was something she had to experience alone.

Because of this incident, she dared not wander about recklessly the next day. After offering incense at the temple, she returned to Beijing. The journey was rough and uncomfortable; even with thick cushions, she felt utterly exhausted. Upon arriving home, she lay down to rest. Not long after, she faintly heard voices under the eaves: "At the very least, Her Highness should be informed. Now that the Inner Cabinet is in charge, if the Emperor becomes a hands-off ruler, who knows how the Inner Cabinet will handle things?"

"What good would it do to tell her now..."

She propped herself up and called for the Inner Attendant, "What is the matter? Come in and speak."

Yu Xixia and Tong Huan hurriedly arrived at the floor screen. She sat up and asked for details through a beaded curtain. Yu Xixia said, "I have just received news that the imperial court plans to increase taxes this year—by twenty percent across all regions, but forty percent for the Southern Garden alone. Additionally, the quotas for tribute grain and salt must not fall below previous years. The naval forces at New River Mouth are to be reorganized, with ship maintenance required for no fewer than eight hundred vessels... Your Highness, if this targeting continues, I fear things may go awry. Even if it isn't the Emperor's idea, if those Inner Cabinet ministers press step by step and truly push the Prince into a corner, what good will it do for the state and altars?"

Wanwan gritted her teeth in anger. "These years of patching one hole by creating another—those cabinet elders have gone mad!"She hurriedly rose to change clothes and sent Yu Xixia to inform Jinshi that she needed to enter the Western Sea immediately. Once properly dressed, she went out, where the sedan chair was already waiting at the second gate. Tong Huan helped her into the sedan, earnestly advising, "Your Highness must not be anxious. Stay calm and composed—your own health is what matters most."

How could she remain calm? There were things she could not voice aloud. What she feared was that Liangshi had no rebellious intentions but was being forced onto that path by them. If things truly reached a point of no return, where it became a life-or-death struggle, how could she possibly fare well?

The carriage wheels rolled to the Grand Palace Gate, where the eunuchs on duty saw someone approaching and stepped forward, hands on hips, to halt them. She descended from the Imperial Carriage, and upon recognizing her, the eunuchs hastily bowed in greeting. She glanced inside the gate and asked, "Are the Grand Secretaries still here?"

The eunuch replied, "Yes, we haven’t seen them leave the garden."

She lifted her skirt and ascended the steps. Since the Emperor had decreed that she could come and go without announcement, the eunuchs dared not stop her and escorted her to the Jade Jar Pavilion. Knowing that the Emperor usually held discussions in the Hall of Inherited Light, she did not need a guide and headed straight there. Between the Hall of Inherited Light and the Jade Jar Pavilion stood the Round City. Passing through the corridor to the rear, she spotted Chongmao standing under the curved roof of the side hall in the distance. The plump eunuch was enjoying himself, squinting as he basked in the sun.

Wanwan called out, "Eunuch Liu!" Startled, Chongmao exclaimed, "Your Highness, what brings you here?"

She did not answer him, only asking whether the Emperor was inside.

Chongmao confirmed he was, "But at the moment, His Majesty is in discussion with the Inner Cabinet. If Your Highness seeks an audience, please wait a moment. Once they have dispersed, I will announce you immediately."

Ignoring this, she waved her hand dismissively and ascended the steps on her own.

Chongmao naturally tried to stop her, but as the Emperor’s sister and bearing a child, no one dared lay a hand on her. Thus, his repeated pleas of "Your Highness, please halt!" were utterly ineffective, and she smoothly entered the main hall.

The Emperor and his ministers paused their discussion and turned to look at her. The Emperor rose from his seat and approached with a smile, saying, "Who lit your fuse this time? Look at you, like a firecracker ready to explode! Shouldn’t you be resting at home during your pregnancy? What brings you here for a stroll?"

Wanwan ignored him, instead casting a cold glance at the two Grand Secretaries. She had seen them both at the Mid-Autumn banquet the previous year—one was Jie Daozhi, Grand Secretary of the Hall of Reverent Body, and the other was Yang Yun, Grand Secretary of the Hall of Hua Gai. They were the leaders of the Inner Cabinet, holding the power of draft proposals. When Xiao Duo was still around, they had to rely on the Directorate of Ceremonial for Red Annotations. Now that Xiao Duo was gone, they had finally risen to prominence, holding their heads high with pride.

Yet, no matter how upright their posture, they still had to bow deeply upon seeing her, offering a long salute: "We pay our respects to the Princess Royal, a thousand years to Your Highness."

She motioned for them to rise. "I’ve been here for a while and overheard the two of you discussing taxation matters outside. Though I am but a woman, I am also a descendant of Emperor Xiaozong. Since ancient times, it has been known that a ruler should treat all Feudal Territories equally. I never imagined that the pillars of the court today would urge the Emperor to distinguish between them. As someone often secluded in the inner chambers, I am unaware of the current trends in the court. I would like to hear the esteemed opinions of you both, so that I may broaden my understanding."The three ministers exchanged glances, knowing she had come for the sake of the Southern Garden, and for a moment, they were at a loss for how to respond. It was Yang Yun who finally steeled himself and clasped his hands in salute. "Your Highness may not be aware, but the treasury's emptiness is a chronic ailment left over from the reign of Emperor Huizong. Even during Xiao Duo's time, expenditures already exceeded income, and after the battles of the Greater and Lesser Ryukyu, the situation has become even more strained. This vast nation, with its millions of subjects—which among them should not be loyal to the sovereign and serve the country? The Southern Garden was originally a land of fish and rice, and compared to the borderlands, it is truly like heaven and earth. Just as in a family, if someone is destitute, those with more flexibility should offer relief. The northern army has not received its pay for years. If we do not find a solution, the soldiers and civilians there will have no way to manage, and sooner or later, a major disaster will occur."

She nodded upon hearing this. "Minister Yang's words, in short, mean we must cut flesh to mend sores, even if it means emptying the Southern Garden, regardless of the cost. The northern military situation is urgent and cannot be ignored, but does the minister know that the refugees in Huaining have become a disaster, nearly dragging the Southern Garden to collapse? In the territory of our Great Ye, there are eight Feudal Princes. May I ask the minister, how many of them are currently providing disaster relief? Once the refugees enter their domains, they are immediately driven toward the Southern Garden—this is the consensus of the other seven Feudal Princes. The imperial court has yet to provide a single measure of grain or a cart of coal. Where, then, did the food for those tens of thousands of refugees to eat for a year come from? The minister compares the imperial court to a family. If so, everyone should share the burden. The expenses of the Southern Garden are already far greater than those of other regions. Without considering their difficulties and demanding endlessly, emptying this rice jar—are you planning to turn the Southern Garden into a second Northern Desert?"

The Inner Cabinet ministers had not expected this Princess Royal, who had long lived secluded in the inner chambers, to possess such formidable eloquence. They had often heard she was timid, but who could have known she would be so precise when discussing matters of governance? However, her pointed opposition angered these arrogant ministers. Xie Daozhi averted his gaze and said haughtily, "Your Highness shows favoritism out of personal bias, but we ministers cannot afford such womanly compassion. Matters of the world naturally fall to the capable. If everyone shirks responsibility and only seeks self-preservation, the state will cease to be a state. Is that what Your Highness wishes to see?"

Wanwan's face paled with anger. She had long known these Inner Cabinet ministers were incompetent, but such recklessness truly proved that as the ruler is, so are the ministers.

Furious to the point of laughter, she retorted, "Minister Xie accuses me of favoritism? I personally went to Huaining to inspect the disaster. Has Minister Xie ever been there? Officials embezzled a hundred thousand dan of grain, leaving the Prince of Nanyuan in despair. Has Minister Xie witnessed that? The Jiangnan region, a land of fish and rice, is burdened with higher taxes than elsewhere because of this very phrase—they must contribute tribute grain, provide disaster relief, support the naval forces, and repair ships. When the imperial court pressures the Feudal Princes, it is the common people who ultimately bear the burden. Feudal Princes may have their favorites, but do the common people have favorites as well? I ask the ministers not to shift the heavy burden onto the Southern Garden simply because they are unable to handle political affairs. Doing so is no different from destroying our own defenses. If we exhaust the last of our reserves, where will we find support when future crises arise?"In such a debate, there was no room for concern over her status. Jie Daozhi confronted her head-on, raising his voice: "Your Highness is a woman; matters of state should not be discussed with you. But since the topic has been raised today, let us deliberate thoroughly. The Southern Garden has always been a grave concern for the imperial court. The Yuwen Clan has dominated the Jiangnan region for over two hundred years. The Sacred Ancestor once said that the Qi People are skilled in warfare and must be guarded against. The court's vigilance toward the Southern Garden has not relaxed, even after the Princess Royal's marriage. Now, famine plagues the entire land, yet only the Southern Garden has granaries overflowing with grain and wealth. For Your Highness to defend the Southern Garden so staunchly, we cannot help but suspect more than just loyalty to your husband. Your Highness claims to care for the people as her own children, yet it seems only the people of the Southern Garden are of concern. To watch the Southern Garden grow so powerful without restraint—could it be that you harbor ambitions to usurp the throne?"

Wanwan had never suffered such false accusations. Overwhelmed with anger, she felt her heart pounding violently, her hands and feet turning icy cold. In the end, she could barely stand, nearly collapsing to the ground. She was both furious and heartbroken. That the Inner Cabinet could speak such words to her face meant they must have filled the Emperor's ears with similar ideas, which explained the scheme to detain her as a hostage. What should she do? How could she escape this hateful trap? Without their ability to twist the truth, she would forever remain at a disadvantage.

Seeing the situation spiraling out of control, the Emperor sternly shouted, "How dare you!" and berated Jie Daozhi: "As Chief Minister, you spend all your energy quarreling with a woman. I am ashamed on your behalf! The northern armies need provisions—do not set your sights on the Southern Garden. The Inner Cabinet must find a solution. If you cannot, pack your bags and go home to tend to your children! Why are you still standing here? Do you need the Silk-clad Guard to escort you out? Get out, and do not anger Her Highness any further!"

The two Inner Cabinet ministers retreated in disgrace from Chengguang Hall. Outside, they exchanged glances and shook their heads.

The Emperor had changed his mind on the spot, and it was all for Wanwan. Her spirit seemed off, her face ashen, and she looked as if she might collapse at any moment. He hurried over to support her, urgently saying, "Sister, catch your breath, don't frighten me. I scolded them; I will reject all their memorials. Please, be happy. I will listen to you... Ah, sister, breathe, breathe!"

He held her close, letting her lean against his shoulder, comforting her while gently patting her back.

It took her a long while to finally cry, her words broken: "Second Brother, why... why are you treating me like this? We... share the same mother!"

The Emperor had no choice but to apologize repeatedly: "It was my mistake. Please don't be sad. We can talk once you feel better. Submitting memorials is the duty of the Inner Cabinet, but whether to approve them is my decision. We are siblings by blood; you can speak your mind openly with me. Why torment yourself like this?" He turned and called to Chongmao, "Summon the Imperial Physician immediately to examine Her Highness."

Wanwan grasped his hand tightly. "Do not suppress the Southern Garden any longer. Brother, please listen to my advice."

"Alright, alright," the Emperor agreed repeatedly. "I will do as you say."

"I also beg you, Brother, to let me return to the Southern Garden, to be with my husband." She placed all her hopes on this, gazing at him intently. "I miss Liangshi. If I cannot see him again, I fear I will not survive."The Emperor's gaze fixed on her face as if he had never known her, looking over and over again, trying to discern something from those bright eyes. Seeing his hesitation, Wanwan thought there was hope and rallied her spirits once more. Yet after a long moment, he turned his face away and called impatiently for Chongmao, "Why hasn't the Imperial Physician arrived yet!"