The year she graduated from university, Zhou Wan saw these words on the school's confession wall—"It's a shame we never got to welcome that blazing summer together."
For a full minute after reading it, she froze.
Her thoughts drifted far away, to a distant person.
Then she shook her head and pushed it all aside.
Graduation.
Four years of university had come to an end.
They took graduation photos, tossing their bachelor hats high into the air, their smiles bright and dazzling.
That evening, Zhou Wan went out for hotpot with her roommates.
They raised glasses of beer in toasts, screaming, shouting, and laughing.
Zhou Wan still had alcohol intolerance, though it was much better than before—no more rashes, but her face would flush red after just one sip. She didn’t get drunk, just a bit allergic, and it would fade back to normal after a while.
So that day, she still drank a little.
Near the end of the meal, Zhou Wan got up to pay the bill.
After they left, her roommates cornered her, asking why she’d secretly paid again.
Zhou Wan smiled. "I got my internship salary yesterday. It was my turn to treat."
"That’s not the point," the dorm leader said. "Come on, send the payment code to the group chat. Let us split it with you."
"Really, it’s fine. We might not get to gather like this often anymore. You’ve all helped me so much over the years—I should’ve treated you long ago."
At that, one of her roommates burst into tears with a loud "Waa—"
She hugged Zhou Wan around the waist, burying her face in her chest. "I’m going to miss you so much, Wanwan."
After leaving Pingchuan City back then, Zhou Wan had returned all the remaining money in her card to Lu Xixiao. With no money for school, she worked for a year, then returned to study for another year of high school before testing into university.
Throughout her four years in college, she worked part-time to support her studies.
Her roommates were all kind. Once they learned about her family situation, they helped her in both obvious and subtle ways—splitting electricity bills three ways without asking Zhou Wan to contribute, often bringing her back a meal from the cafeteria.
Zhou Wan hugged her roommate and said with a smile, "It’s okay. We’re all still in City B. We can meet whenever we have time."
On a summer night, the air was thick with heat, and cicadas chirped incessantly from the trees.
Four young women walked along the university paths, crying and laughing, chatting about everything under the sun.
As they neared the dormitory building, the dorm leader nudged Zhou Wan and tilted her chin forward.
Zhou Wan looked ahead and saw Jiang Yan standing by the dorm entrance.
"He’s really persistent," the dorm leader shrugged. They all knew Jiang Yan—not just because of Zhou Wan, but because he was a campus celebrity. Now in his first year of graduate school, he had already won numerous awards and published several papers.
"Wanwan, I bet he’s here to confess to you today."
Zhou Wan shook her head. "Don’t say things like that."
Her roommates waved and hurried upstairs.
Jiang Yan turned his head, noticed her, and walked over. "Zhou Wan."
"Yeah."
"Got a moment? Let’s take a walk."
Zhou Wan paused. "Okay."
There was a small sports field next to the dorm, still bustling with people jogging and exercising at this hour. They walked along the outer track.
Having spent a year working to save money, Zhou Wan was only graduating now in her fourth year. Strictly speaking, she ought to call Jiang Yan her senior.Since that incident years ago, Zhou Wan had cut off all contact with Jiang Yan. Even when he reached out to her, she never responded. Later, her phone was stolen, she changed her number, couldn't log into WeChat, and got a new account.
It wasn't until she started university that she saw Jiang Yan again.
They didn't interact much, with Jiang Yan only occasionally seeking her out.
"Zhou Wan," Jiang Yan said, "do you still resent me for what I did back then?"
Zhou Wan blinked and shook her head. "No."
"Then..."
She interrupted, her voice gentle: "I don't resent what you did to me, but I can't forgive you on his behalf. He was so proud, yet he knelt because of that incident and spent over a month hospitalized."
Jiang Yan, of course, knew who "he" referred to.
It had been a long time since he'd heard Lu Xixiao's name.
After that incident, Lu Zhongyue had blamed him, leading to a huge argument with Jiang Wensheng. Since then, he hadn't seen Lu Xixiao again.
"Do you still like him?" Jiang Yan asked.
Zhou Wan paused, silent for a moment before letting out a soft laugh. "To me, he isn't someone who can be defined by simple feelings of like or dislike."
Jiang Yan said nothing.
Zhou Wan lifted her head, gazing at the stars in the sky. "You know, over the years, many people have asked me how I managed to endure everything alone back then. But when I look back now, what comes to mind isn't those painful, drawn-out experiences—it's his image: resilient, strong, defiant, and courageously solitary."
"Jiang Yan, all these years, it's because of him that I've made it this far."
They walked a full lap around the track field, returning to where they started.
Zhou Wan stopped and turned to look at Jiang Yan. Her voice was gentle yet resolute and firm: "Jiang Yan, don't come looking for me anymore. I don't hold a grudge against you, but I can't forgive you either."
...
Back in her dorm, Zhou Wan packed her luggage.
The next day, everyone went their separate ways, returning their dorm keys to the housing administrator.
Four years of university had come to an end at this moment.
During her college entrance exams, Zhou Wan had coincidentally gotten her period, causing stomach pain. While it wasn't a major setback, her score wasn't high enough to freely choose any major, so she ultimately opted for media and journalism.
She landed a promising job, having interned since the start of her senior year and smoothly secured a position. Now, with her diploma in hand, it wouldn't be long before she became a full-time employee.
She rented a studio apartment near her company and took a day off to settle in.
Carrying her luggage upstairs alone, she swept and mopped the floors, wiped the windows, and dusted every surface. By the time she finished cleaning, the sky had already darkened. Zhou Wan placed her clothes one by one into the wardrobe, then opened a cardboard box filled with miscellaneous items. Reaching the bottom, her fingers stilled.
She saw a photograph.
With the passage of time, the photo had yellowed and faded.
Yet the boy's features remained vivid and clear.
Zhou Wan didn't dare to look too closely. She quickly retrieved it and tucked it away in the deepest part of her bedside drawer.
That night, she had a dream.
She dreamed of her last phone call with Lu Xixiao.
That call had ended on a bitter note.
After she said those words, Lu Xixiao remained silent for a long time. Finally, he said, "Zhou Wan, don't let me see you again, or I'll make you beg me in tears."
Perhaps that was the harshest thing the arrogant, untamed boy had ever said to her.
In the morning, her alarm clock woke her.
Zhou Wan sat up in bed and wiped her eyes—they were wet.
She paid it no mind and quickly got up to wash her face.
...New media companies, having just flourished in recent years, always pile endless tasks on newcomers. Zhou Wan was assigned numerous duties, kept dizzyingly busy every day.
In this industry, people come and go constantly. Newcomers are treated like machines, burdened with countless trivial tasks. Those with some seniority hold resources and social finesse - some nurture talent and offer guidance, while others act imperiously.
But fortunately, such hectic days left no time for other thoughts, making time pass relatively quickly.
After six months at work, Zhou Wan became the company's youngest Team Leader.
She encountered a good supervisor - a woman in her thirties. Though young, she was meticulous and often scolded subordinates, making many fear her. Yet she was fair in rewards and punishments, valued talent, and had mentored Zhou Wan.
Zhou Wan felt deeply grateful to her.
But just one week after becoming Team Leader, her supervisor was suddenly fired.
It was abrupt - no one knew what had happened.
She had never been one for casual chatter, neither attracting hatred nor being particularly liked. On the day she packed her desk, only Zhou Wan helped her.
Zhou Wan carried a cardboard box to escort her to the elevator.
Her supervisor stopped her: "This is far enough, you should go back now."
"Sister Li, you have so many things - let me help you carry them down."
The supervisor smiled and said, "You're still too young."
Zhou Wan paused.
"I was fired because I displeased the big boss. You should be distancing yourself from me immediately, yet you're seeing me off - aren't you afraid of being implicated?"
If it were a more reckless newcomer, they might have insisted on principles and escorted her downstairs anyway.
But Zhou Wan didn't.
Having learned worldly wisdom too early, she knew Sister Li was right, understood her meaning, and knew she couldn't afford to lose this job.
Sister Li knew Zhou Wan was smart enough to grasp things immediately. Patting her shoulder, she took the cardboard box from Zhou Wan's arms and said, "Work hard, Zhou Wan."
"Mhm."
She responded with difficulty, ashamed of her current choice, "I'm sorry, Sister Li."
"Nothing to be sorry about. I'd make the same choice in your position."
As the elevator doors closed, she looked at Zhou Wan and said softly, "Zhou Wan, no matter what, I hope you can stay true to yourself. The road ahead might not be easy - you must be brave and steadfast."
...
She understood the meaning of the last part that very afternoon.
After Sister Li left, the department head position became vacant. The big boss promoted her to fill it - becoming a department head at 24 inevitably sparked gossip in the company.
People said she had an improper relationship with the big boss, that she'd whispered in his ear to get the former department head fired so she could take the position.
At 24, Zhou Wan was gentle and quiet, beautiful with a soft, even-tempered disposition.
The perfect candidate to bear such rumors.
As for the meaning of the first part of what Sister Li had told her, Zhou Wan only understood it a month later -
"Zhou Wan, no matter what, I hope you can stay true to yourself."
On Friday evening, there was a new project social engagement, and the boss asked her to accompany him.
This was normal - as department head, she couldn't avoid these occasions. Zhou Wan took two allergy pills in advance and went together to the most upscale club.
Over the years, she'd learned some slickness, using smooth talk to avoid drinking without offending anyone.
But she still had to drink a little.
Even after taking allergy medication, Zhou Wan still felt somewhat unwell.This time the alcohol didn't rush to her face, and outwardly she appeared completely normal. Only Zhou Wan knew her heart rate was steadily climbing, leaving her somewhat alarmed.
She excused herself to the restroom, went to the toilet to induce vomiting, and expelled all the alcohol she had just consumed.
Only then did her heart rate begin to drop again.
Repeating this process left her throat burning with pain.
Eventually, Zhou Wan didn't dare to make herself vomit anymore.
Fortunately, it was finally over.
After seeing the clients off, her boss turned and took hold of Zhou Wan's arm. "It's quite late, Xiao Zhou. Why don't you ride back with me?"
"No need, Director Huang." Zhou Wan subtly withdrew her hand. "I wouldn't want to trouble you. My friend happens to be nearby and will give me a lift later."
"I recall you live near the company, so it's on the way. Let's go." He wrapped his arm around her waist, his fingertips lightly brushing against her side.
His touch made her skin crawl, every hair on her body standing on end.
Suddenly, she understood what Sister Li had meant and why she had angered the boss and been fired.
"Xiao Zhou, you're the most promising young talent in our company," Director Huang said. "You're bound to keep rising, so making the right choices is crucial. The right decisions can make all the difference."
As he guided her outside, Zhou Wan listened to his suggestive words.
The alcohol made her heart race uncontrollably, leaving her dizzy and panicked.
She forced herself to stay calm and think of a way out.
Fortunately, as soon as they stepped outside, a man approached, calling out "Director Huang." Seemingly an acquaintance, Zhou Wan took the opportunity to step away and stand to the side.
"Director Huang." Zhou Wan nodded politely, her expression unreadable. "I'll be heading back now."
With others present, Director Huang couldn't persist openly. He had no choice but to nod in agreement, adding with feigned concern, "Be careful on your way back, and send me a message when you get home."
The man beside them looked at her with a noticeably different gaze.
Young, beautiful women in the workplace were always scrutinized through tinted lenses and underestimated.
Zhou Wan felt utterly disgusted, nauseated. She nodded perfunctorily, turned, and walked away quickly.
Her brisk pace soon turned into a run. She didn't stop until she reached the roadside, where the cold wind finally dispersed some of the revulsion churning in her chest.
The last few glasses of alcohol remained undigested, leaving her entire body uncomfortable and feverish. Her heart rate soared, and her head spun dizzily.
She wanted to stand in the wind for a while before going back inside to find a restroom and vomit.
In the late-night city of B, neon lights glittered, and the streets buzzed with endless streams of cars and people—lively yet lonely.
Leaning against the roadside railing alone, Zhou Wan wore a beige dress that reached her calves, paired with simple flats. Her narrow, slender feet revealed faint traces of veins. In such a city, she appeared fragile yet uniquely captivating, like an untouched sanctuary.
But at that moment, Zhou Wan paid no attention to the gazes fixed on her. Her brow furrowed, eyes half-closed, she only wished the night wind would blow stronger, carrying away the scent of alcohol clinging to her.
After a while, her legs grew numb from standing.
Zhou Wan gently stamped her feet, ready to leave, when suddenly she heard a voice not far away.
No matter how many years passed, she would never forget that voice.
Magnetic, husky, tinged with a lazy smile—carefree, roguish, yet utterly at ease.
Unable to help herself, her gaze snapped toward the source of the sound.To be precise, at this moment, she felt she must be drunk and had mistaken someone else for Lu Xixiao.
The world is so vast, China is so large, and even City B is enormous—how could people separated in their youth reunite so easily?
Yet she saw Lu Xixiao’s face as clearly as day.
After all these years, he had matured and grown thinner.
If he was once the sharpest sword in the world, the Lu Xixiao of today was a blade tempered in fire, glowing with embers of intensity.
He leaned against the wall, his hair slightly tousled by the wind. The top button of his white shirt was undone, and the fabric clung to the sharp contours of his waist, accentuating his broad shoulders and narrow hips—clear evidence of disciplined training.
He pulled out a cigarette and clamped it between his teeth.
A long-legged woman beside him produced a lighter, shielding the flame with one hand as she leaned in to light it for him.
Lu Xixiao cooperatively lowered his head, lit the cigarette, took a deep drag, and tilted his head to exhale the smoke.
As he turned, his gaze fell upon Zhou Wan.
But after only a second, he calmly looked away and resumed chatting with the group across from him.
As if he hadn’t recognized her at all.
Zhou Wan blinked slowly.
She knew she must have had too much to drink—otherwise, she would never have walked toward Lu Xixiao. Even as she took step after step, she wasn’t sure whether the person before her was the real Lu Xixiao or just a figment of her imagination.
She just wanted to confirm.
So she spoke: "Lu Xixiao."
The man across from her, cigarette pinched between his fingers, abruptly lost his smile. He tossed the cigarette aside, strode forward with purpose, and shed his facade of detached indifference. Roughly, he grabbed Zhou Wan by the collar and shoved her against the wall.
Romantic dramas unfolding outside nightlife venues always attract attention, especially when the leads are as striking as these two.
Lu Xixiao had never liked being stared at like a spectacle.
But in this moment, he couldn’t care less.
The fury he had suppressed for six years raged inside him, and today, it had finally found its outlet.
As Zhou Wan hit the wall, her shoulder blade struck the brick with a heavy thud, the pain nearly bringing tears to her eyes.
But Lu Xixiao didn’t loosen his grip in the slightest, his palm pressing forcefully against her shoulder.
"Zhou Wan."
His voice was ground out from the depths of his throat. In contrast to Zhou Wan’s gentle, refined demeanor, he seemed crazed, as if he wanted to kill someone. His eyes were bloodshot, whether from rage or resentment.
"Zhou Wan, how dare you show up? How dare you show up?"
The scent of alcohol and tobacco clung to him as he gritted his teeth and asked, word by word, "Do you have a death wish?"
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