Fang Muyang said he had never attended a school dance, but Fei Ni didn’t quite believe him.
She laughed and said, “Even if you went often, it wouldn’t matter.”
“It really wouldn’t, but since I haven’t gone, I can’t lie to you.”
Fei Ni then asked whether their first life drawing class would feature a male or female model.
Fang Muyang said it was probably a female model. As a married man, he didn’t care as much as the unmarried students did whether the model was male or female—it was just a model, after all.
Fei Ni asked, “Why not a male model?” She wasn’t so bored as to feel jealous over such a thing; she was simply curious.
“There will be male models later,” Fang Muyang said with a smile. “I actually hope it’s a male model. That way, I could apply for the job and earn some money to treat you to a meal.”
Fei Ni scolded him under her breath for being improper.
“Alright, if you don’t like the idea of others seeing me, I’ll only let you see me.”
“Who would want to look at you?”
“You don’t?”
The two of them danced closely, appearing to outsiders as a perfectly matched couple. They whispered intimately, sharing words only the two of them could hear. Fang Muyang asked Fei Ni if she would let him practice before the official life drawing class began. As a married man, he didn’t want to appear more awkward than the unmarried students. He asked if she was willing, but Fei Ni hadn’t expected him to bring up such a topic in public. Though no one else could hear what he was saying, she was momentarily distracted and stepped on his foot.
Fang Muyang assumed it was because she wasn’t skilled at dancing and continued patiently teaching her, all the while quietly teasing her with playful remarks. Fei Ni’s heart was in disarray because of him, and she frequently missed the beat, stepping on his feet multiple times. Fang Muyang didn’t seem to mind the pain and kept whispering to her. Some oblivious individuals, aware that Fei Ni was already taken, still couldn’t resist the urge to offer to teach her how to dance. After all, given Fei Ni’s intelligence, if she couldn’t learn, it could only mean the teacher was at fault.
Fei Ni initially didn’t want to agree, but Fang Muyang generously released her hand and let her dance with someone else. The one who took his place was a graduate student from Fei Ni’s department who had recently been gaining attention. In front of others, Fang Muyang gently pinched Fei Ni’s cheek. Though his touch was light, her face flushed because of it. Fang Muyang tactfully found a seat and watched Fei Ni dance with someone else. She moved gracefully as she chatted with her partner. Fang Muyang took out paper and a pen and began sketching Fei Ni. Even though she was dancing with another, his drawing featured only her. Fei Ni occasionally glanced his way, but only for a moment or two.
By the time he finished his sketch, Fei Ni still hadn’t changed partners. Fang Muyang stepped forward, took her hand, and became her dance partner once again. He handed the camera he had brought to the senior who had been dancing with Fei Ni and asked him to take several photos of the two of them. Fang Muyang didn’t notice the other man’s expression, his eyes fixed on Fei Ni’s smiling face. Fei Ni said it wasn’t necessary—the senior still had others to dance with and no time to take photos for them. In the end, the man took the camera. This time, they simply held each other and danced, gazing at one another without speaking, exchanging even fewer words than Fei Ni had with her previous partner. Their faces were very close, a distance perfectly suited for a kiss, but the setting was inappropriate, as others kept glancing their way. Fang Muyang spoke to her in a voice only she could hear, and Fei Ni lowered her head with a smile, her eyes landing on his shoes.The dance hadn't ended yet, but the two of them left early. Fang Muyang retrieved the camera from his senior and thanked him. Fei Ni sat on the bicycle's rear rack, her arms wrapped around Fang Muyang's waist, complaining, "People come here to dance. Why did you bother him to take photos for us?"
"I was afraid he didn't know we're already married."
"Who wouldn't know that?"
"If you danced with others more, you'd realize I'm the best match for you."
"Do you often dance with others for comparison too?"
Fang Muyang immediately sensed the danger in her words. "I've never once been to a school dance."
"Then how come you dance quite well?"
"It's not that difficult. Besides, would I come here unprepared and embarrass you?" Fang Muyang brought up his request at the dance again.
Fei Ni fell silent.
Shamelessly, Fang Muyang proposed a solution: "If you feel shortchanged, you can paint me first, until you're satisfied."
Fei Ni laughed at him. "Compared to that, I'm more interested in what we're having for dinner tonight." They had both been busy before the dance and hadn't eaten yet.
Sitting around the alcohol stove eating noodles, Fei Ni picked up a slice of luncheon meat and put it in Fang Muyang's bowl, telling him to eat more. She had visited the Art Academy's cafeteria several times and found it truly awful. Fei Ni discussed buying a house with Fang Muyang. After her little niece was born, her sister-in-law had managed to get assigned a room through various means, similar to what Fei Ni had been allocated before. Her sister-in-law and in-laws continued living in the exchanged two-bedroom apartment, while the previous occupant of Fei Ni's room moved into the one her sister-in-law had been assigned, leaving Fei Ni's room vacant. Fei Ni thought that after graduation, she definitely wouldn't return to work at the hat factory, so there was no need to keep occupying the factory's housing. It would be better to return it properly and legitimately buy their own home. With the population growing but limited private property houses available for purchase, housing prices were likely to keep rising. It would be better to buy now and save on rent. In their own home, Fang Muyang could do whatever he wanted without worrying about how to restore the walls if he painted on them. Fei Ni shared her thoughts with Fang Muyang, who agreed.
He had always supported Fei Ni buying a house, with the deed solely in her name. For a family, whose name it's under doesn't matter.
Lying on the rug in the studio, her head resting on Fang Muyang's arm, Fei Ni gazed at the stars through the skylight. She pinched his arm—going to university and having their own home felt almost unreal, she was so happy. But Fang Muyang seemed insensitive to pain; when she asked if it hurt, he just said no. Fei Ni turned over and bit his cheek, laughing as she asked, "Does this hurt?"
"No."
"Then you bite me."
Afraid of hurting her, Fang Muyang bit very gently the first time.
Fei Ni told him to bite harder, or it would feel fake.
But this time, Fang Muyang deliberately didn't listen, biting lightly each time until Fei Ni squirmed and rolled on the rug from the tickling.
The tickling sensation was real too. Covering her mouth, Fei Ni told Fang Muyang to stay away. But for Fang Muyang, that was impossible.
After fooling around for a while, Fei Ni asked him, "Didn't you want to paint? Do it now."
Fang Muyang wondered if he'd heard wrong. "Really?"
"Fake!"Throughout the painting process, Fei Ni kept her face hidden behind a book. She was genuinely reading, and she couldn't help but admire the female models hired by the Art Academy—being openly observed was an incredibly difficult thing to do. At least, she found it difficult. Fortunately, the book provided some cover.
She lowered the book just below her eyes and stole a glance at Fang Muyang, noticing that he now appeared even more serious than when he was dancing, as if it were he who should not be treated lightly.
When the painting was finally done, Fei Ni wrapped herself in a blanket and went to look. Though her eyelids had been heavy with sleep, she now felt wide awake. In the painting, the lower half of her face was obscured by the book, revealing only a pair of eyes that held a mix of shyness and mischief. Muyang grabbed her hand and kissed it. Fei Ni turned her face away from him. "I'm too tired, I need to sleep."
"But I don't want to sleep yet."
"I don't care."
Fang Muyang pulled Fei Ni into his arms. "If you don't care for me, who will?"
The matter of buying a house was settled, but just before the purchase, Fang Muyang proposed a new idea. He suggested buying a place closer to Fei Ni's school, making it more convenient for her to come home during the week. Since Fei Ni would likely work at the school after graduation, he himself was flexible—distance didn't matter much to him. However, Fei Ni had grown attached to the old house and disagreed with moving. They had already invested a lot in the initial renovations, and although the house was farther from her, it was closer to Fang Muyang, so its location wasn't entirely without merit. Fei Ni controlled the finances, and the final decision on buying the house rested with her. Fang Muyang's suggestion was overruled.
Of course, there was a perfect solution: keep the old house and buy a new one. But they didn't have the money for that, so Fang Muyang didn't bring it up.
Another summer arrived, and Fang Muyang discovered a good house for sale near Fei Ni's school. It was excellent in every way, but they lacked the funds to buy it. Coincidentally, someone he had met while working as a waiter at a foreign affairs hotel admired his technique of using oil painting styles in Chinese painting. Fang Muyang had given him a painting back then, and now, unexpectedly, there was a response: the man offered to cover his airfare to bring some paintings to New York, as his wife owned a gallery there.
Fang Muyang knew that this trip to America was less about art and more of a commercial endeavor. To sell his paintings, he would have to play by their rules—most so-called individuality was just packaged homogeneity, and that circle had its own mainstream. Going against the tide would mean his work wouldn't sell. Even if he signed a contract with the gallery, there was no guarantee his paintings would sell, let alone fetch a high price. He didn't have any strong attachment to money; even if he didn't profit from this trip, he wouldn't lose anything—he'd get a free ticket and a chance to visit his sister and an uncle he had only seen in photos for years. If possible, he hoped his uncle could return to pay his respects at their grandmother's grave. If he could make some money, even better—he could buy that courtyard for Fei Ni.
Fei Ni had no idea that her husband lacked grand ambitions, harbored no desire for fame overseas, and only wanted to earn enough for a courtyard for her. She took the matter very seriously and planned to exchange their remaining savings into dollars for him, believing that one should travel with ample funds. Fang Muyang firmly stopped her—that small amount wouldn't amount to much in dollars, and while it would be easy for him to spend, it was hard for Fei Ni to earn. He insisted on handling the exchange himself.Fei Ni went to the airport to see Fang Muyang off. Before his departure, Fang Muyang handed her another envelope containing the money she had intended for him to exchange for U.S. dollars. Fang Muyang told Fei Ni that since he was being cordially invited by others, they would surely take good care of him, and there was no reason for him to spend money. Even he didn’t quite believe what he was saying.
Yet he spoke with such sincerity, as if it were truly the case.
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