On Saturday, Li Yifei handed Qian Fei a black shirt and said, "Emergency task. I need to wear this to a friend's wedding tomorrow."
Qian Fei immediately put her hands on her hips, furious. "Li Yifei, do you really think I'm your housemaid or something?"
Li Yifei patted her shoulder with a sanctimonious smile. "Don't make our relationship sound so transactional! What we have is genuine affection!"
Qian Fei swatted his hand away. "Keep your hands to yourself! We're not that close!"
Seeing her stubborn refusal to serve him, Li Yifei's eyes gleamed as he suddenly said, "Give me back the tea leaves then!"
Qian Fei choked. "What tea leaves? Wait—what kind of person are you, bringing this up now of all times?"
Li Yifei eyed her. "You gave them away as a gift, didn't you? Can't get them back now, can you?" He shoved the shirt into her arms. "Listen, sis, you're lucky I'm not making you pay your debt with your body. Now hurry up and wash this for me!"
Qian Fei gritted her teeth. "How did you know I gave them away?"
She saw Li Yifei struggling to hold back laughter, his expression dripping with disdain. "What kind of drinking manners do you have? Do you just irresponsibly forget everything you say when you're drunk?"
Qian Fei retorted angrily, "That's called having a low alcohol tolerance, not bad drinking manners. Thanks for the clarification!"
She took the shirt and gave it a disgusted look before turning back to Li Yifei with a glare. "Fine, I'll wash it, but you have to go downstairs and buy groceries!"
Li Yifei refused outright. "You can go buy them yourself after you're done washing."
Qian Fei threw the shirt back at him. "Choose one—washing clothes or buying groceries!" She paused, fuming. "Honestly, Li Yifei, you can't be this much of a spoiled young master, can you?"
Li Yifei pushed the shirt back into her arms and said pompously, "Fine, I'll go! Qian Fei, let me tell you, you're in for a treat today. This young master has never gone grocery shopping before! If my old man finds out I gave this first-time experience to you instead of him, he'd probably have a heart attack!"
Qian Fei nearly gagged.
Was it really necessary to elevate a simple grocery run to such dramatic heights? Even dragging out the family estrangement for effect.
"Enough nonsense!" Qian Fei shoved him out the door. "You eat my food, wear the clothes I wash, and enjoy being waited on like a housemaid, yet you treat me like a pack mule! If my mom were watching from heaven, she'd be heartbroken! Maybe she'll pay you a visit tonight to have a word!"
Li Yifei scoffed and sauntered out.
Qian Fei looked at the shirt in her hands—black with gold buttons, the tag bearing the logo of some international luxury brand. She smirked and tossed the "high-end knockoff" into the washing machine without a second thought, letting it spin mercilessly.
By the time the laundry was done, Li Yifei still hadn't returned. Qian Fei wondered if the idiot had gone to plant vegetables from scratch.
When she pulled the shirt out of the machine, she noticed the buttons weren't as shiny as before.
Just as she was inspecting them, Li Yifei finally came back, carrying a Carrefour bag stuffed with groceries.Qian Fei had long given up complaining about him choosing to buy expensive groceries from Carrefour instead of the cheaper ones at the local market. She figured with his abysmal life skills, he just couldn’t handle the concept.
“The checkout line is way too long! My heels are killing me from waiting!” Li Yifei grumbled as he carried the groceries into the kitchen. After washing his hands, he came out and asked Qian Fei, “Why are you staring at me like you’re reading my fortune?”
Then he turned and followed her gaze to his own shirt.
One glance was all it took for him to let out a horrified shriek.
“Sister Qian! Seriously?! You just threw this into the washing machine like that?!” He gaped at the now-dull buttons.
Qian Fei rolled her eyes. “What? Was I supposed to lick it clean instead?”
Li Yifei slapped his forehead. “I need to calm down!” Then he bent slightly, gripped her shoulders, and spoke slowly, enunciating every word, “Sister, when washing this kind of shirt, you’re supposed to cut off all the gold buttons first, then sew them back on after it’s dry! That way, the detergent won’t damage them, and the buttons won’t scratch the fabric! I thought this was common knowledge!”
Qian Fei twisted out of his grip. “Get lost! It’s just a knockoff—why are you being so extra?”
Li Yifei snatched the shirt from her and pointed emphatically. “Look closely! These are solid gold buttons! And this is the real brand tag!”
She swatted his hand away. “Yeah, right! I don’t believe it for a second! If they were real, they wouldn’t lose their shine after one wash! If this shirt were genuine, how much would it even cost? If you had eight or ten of these, you could upgrade from a fifth-ring loft to a fourth-ring one—why would you still be renting with me? Stop pretending just to save face! Don’t you get tired of living such a vain life?” Seeing his dark expression, she softened slightly. “Alright, stop sulking. I’ll buy you an identical one from Taobao to make up for it, okay?”
Li Yifei stared at her, his expression shifting from outrage to resignation, then finally settling into a bitter smile.
He shoved the shirt back at her. “You’re the only person in the world who can piss me off and still make me laugh.”
Qian Fei rolled her eyes again. “Thanks, but I don’t feel honored.” She turned to hang the shirt up.
By evening, the shirt was dry. Qian Fei ironed it and brought it to Li Yifei before starting dinner.
When the food was ready, she went to call him.
His door was ajar, and she paused in the doorway, watching as he hunched over, clumsily and awkwardly… sewing a button?
Qian Fei was stunned. She never thought he’d actually try to do something himself.
She walked over. “What are you doing? Come eat first.” Then she looked down and her jaw dropped.
He was cutting buttons off another shirt and transferring them to the newly washed one.
The stitches he was making were so haphazard and lumpy that it nearly brought tears to her eyes.
“Dude, get a grip! Your sewing is worse than the dull buttons!” Then she paused. “Wait a second—why didn’t you just make me do it? Were you afraid I’d keep teasing you about the knockoff thing and hurt your pride?”Li Yifei paused his needlework and looked up at her. "No, I'm just afraid you'll make me do the dishes after dinner as payback!"
Qian Fei was taken aback for a moment before bursting into laughter. "Congratulations, kid! You're learning to anticipate answers! Since you've already thought of it, why don't we just go with that? Alright, alright, put it down. I'll help you sew it after dinner! If you keep fiddling with it, all my washing and ironing will have been for nothing!"
After dinner, Qian Fei pushed the dishes toward Li Yifei. "Go wash them!"
Li Yifei said, "I'd rather go back to sewing buttons!"
Qian Fei retorted, "If you don't wash the dishes today, I'll cut off all the buttons from your clothes and sew them onto that knockoff of yours!"
Li Yifei gritted his teeth. "Qian Fei, you're ruthless! What's that saying again? 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!'"
Qian Fei stacked the bowls directly into his hands. "Enough nonsense! After freeloading for so long, it's about time you contributed some labor!"
Li Yifei made a last-ditch effort. "I'm telling you, I've never washed dishes before. If the soap doesn't rinse off and you end up poisoned, don't blame me!"
Qian Fei pushed him into the kitchen. "What's death, anyway? Ever since our advanced math teacher changed his mind last minute before finals and refused to give us any hints, leaving us to suffer through the exam, I've learned not to take life too seriously! Don't worry, go ahead! I promise I'll face death with equanimity while licking the soap bubbles!"
Watching Li Yifei reluctantly turn on the faucet while grumbling, she flashed him a mischievous grin and went inside to sew the buttons.
※※※※※※
Li Yifei was attending his cousin Dajun's wedding.
At the wedding, Dajun's eyes nearly popped out when he saw him.
"Handsome? What's going on? I remember this shirt didn't look like this when you bought it. Where are those flashy, fancy buttons? Without those golden buttons, you're actually willing to wear this out? Where's your usual fussiness, my young master? Damn, am I witnessing a miracle here?"
Li Yifei snorted. "This is nothing. If I told you I've even gone grocery shopping and washed dishes, wouldn't you scream and jump off a building?"
Dajun punched him in the chest. "You jerk! Stop joking! Those hands of yours, young master, have never done manual labor except for touching girls! Back when you said you boiled water for your dad, I was shocked!"
Li Yifei looked at him seriously. "I really did go grocery shopping and wash dishes."
Dajun stared at him, dumbfounded. "For who? That little true love of yours? No, you told me you already broke up with her. Was it your dad? No, you two fell out even earlier! Then who?"
Li Yifei rolled his eyes and didn't answer.
Dajun chattered on incessantly. "If your dad ever finds out your 'first time' was given to someone else, he'd be heartbroken!"
Li Yifei still ignored him.
Dajun thought for a moment and changed the subject.
"You're still renting outside instead of going home? Didn't you already break up with that little true love of yours? How long are you going to keep fighting with your dad?"
Li Yifei looked at him and said with feigned profundity, "Kid, you don't understand! My fight with Dad isn't mainly about him blocking me from having a girlfriend. It's because he looks down on me—he thinks I can't do anything without him. I just want to prove him wrong. We both share the surname Li; I won't let him belittle me!"Dajun snorted, "Who the hell are you trying to prove a point to? Fine, if you don’t want to go home, then move out and rent your own place. At least the guys and I can come over for all-night drinking sessions. Right now, you’ve got that female landlord living with you—such a hassle! And dude, don’t you think it’s awkward sharing a place with a woman, just the two of you?"
Li Yifei smirked shamelessly. "Awkward? I’m living the dream!" He raised an eyebrow at Dajun. "You have no idea how useful my landlord is! Cooking, cleaning, laundry, even scrubbing the toilet—she’s more dependable than any guy!"
Dajun laughed so hard he trembled. "Damn, after all these years, you’re still a complete scumbag!"
※※※※※※
After watching the newlyweds’ ceremony, Dajun dragged Li Yifei to the banquet for a feast.
At the table, Dajun nudged Li Yifei. "Tell me, what’s the deal with your clothes? Did you cut off the buttons to pawn them because you’re broke or what? If you’re really that desperate, just say the word—I can top up your phone with a million bucks, no problem!"
Li Yifei snapped, "Screw you!" Then he explained how Qian Fei had ruined his buttons while washing them.
Dajun gaped at him. "Would it kill you to take your clothes to the dry cleaners? If you’re this broke, just stop fighting with your old man already!" After a pause, he added, "But this isn’t like you. You’ve never had this much patience with women. She ruined your gold buttons, and you didn’t even give her hell?" Another pause, then he slapped his thigh and exclaimed, "Wait—those grocery shopping and dishwashing chores you mentioned, were those for her too?"
Li Yifei shot him a wicked grin and nodded.
Dajun choked. "Holy shit! Don’t tell me you’ve fallen for a tomboy!"
Author’s Note: Thank you all, my lovely readers, for the mines! Mwah! >33<
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