Sitting cross-legged in front of her computer waiting for ticket sales to open, Zhao Xiaorou anxiously resorted to scalpers and paid a premium to secure tickets for Eunhyuk and Donghae's Asia tour concert in Hong Kong on June 29th.
She had originally wanted to attend the Korean concert, but during her relationship with Ma Liang, she had forgotten to keep track of the dates. By the time she realized, the tickets were long sold out.
After refreshing Interpark for days while cursing Ma Liang for causing her to miss the ticket rush, she saw resold tickets priced at 2500 yuan on Weibo.
Though Zhao Xiaorou earned a seven-to-eight-figure annual income and had once stayed up all night queuing for tickets worth 90,000 KRW, she absolutely refused to buy from unscrupulous scalpers.
Having successfully obtained front-row tickets for the Hong Kong show, she seized the excitement to send an email she'd been contemplating for a long time. Using the excuse of filming a Shanghai Drifting Youth Vlog episode, she reached out to Diao Zhiyu and Hu Xiu to bury the hatchet.
Her email carried a warm tone: "We were once friends too - it's been so long since we've shared a meal together."
After anxiously waiting ten minutes, Li Ai's reply was brief: "I've been quite busy lately. You guys have fun."
Her initially bolstered mood plummeted the moment she closed her laptop. Li Ai showed no intention of reconciling with her at all.
Sending the screenshot to Hu Xiu, Zhao Xiaorou unleashed a string of voice messages: "In three years of knowing him, I never realized he'd be this difficult. I just want to be friends - I swear I have no ulterior motives. He takes all my business projects, yet won't even take my calls. Why is it so hard to make this iceberg melt in my hands?"
"No ulterior motives? I still firmly believe your relationship with Ma Liang was purely to make Li Ai jealous."
"Don't mention Ma Liang. That just makes me angrier - after I humiliated him at Ogilvy, the middle-aged women in the department took him out for hotpot that very night, saying he was too pitiful being bullied by his ex-girlfriend, comforting his fragile heart overnight.
How ridiculous! The sheer shamelessness! That guy parades around with women's affections and his fake nose, yet hasn't shown any slip-ups so far.
Even my friend Natalie almost thought he was decent, until she heard about my dating experience and realized it was all fake."
"He still occasionally asks me for emergency translation help, and Diao Zhiyu gets messages from him too - mostly showing off his relationships. Lately... apparently his new girlfriend from the nightclub has huge breasts..."
"I know, I recognize that Internet celebrity. Unfortunately, she's a fake rich girl too, and won't be buying Ma Liang any watches.
If he really wants watches, he should honestly target serious women like Cuixi.
I've come to understand now - impure motives in love never yield genuine results."
"So you're starting schemes with Li Ai?"
"I swear again, I won't entertain any thoughts about him anymore. I give up."
"You're quite strange - you can be gentle with anyone, yet you can't speak properly when it comes to Li Ai."
"Because I'm not confident I'm still good enough for him. After all this turmoil..."
The back-and-forth voice messages stopped here, with Hu Xiu not replying further, likely busy with something else;
Zhao Xiaorou's gathering plans, half-formed all day, ultimately fell through. Her assistant of six years bustled around the living room as she walked over to check the hotpot ingredients in the bags, thinking what a pity it was for the planned vlog topic to go to waste.But the idea wasn't particularly novel—home and hotel settings rarely generate fresh stories.
She brought the basketball to find Li Ai. On the damp rainy-season ground, amid the rhythmic thumping of the basketball, Zhao Xiaorou spotted Li Ai's figure.
He could already run a few steps with his recovering leg—making layups, dribbling, performing fake moves with others...
The surgery had been truly successful, and his diligent rehabilitation showed. Back when Li Ai had stubbornly dragged his injured leg to fight legal battles, it seemed he'd contemplated ending everything if his leg worsened.
She wondered who had brought love into his life, enabling him to live so healthily and positively now.
A few unfamiliar young girls sat nearby, likely girlfriends of his teammates.
Holding the basketball, her heart seemed to tremble with worry in sync with Li Ai's footsteps—did he have a new girlfriend?
Had he already forgotten her? During the three years he'd known her, had he ever developed even slight affection amid her enthusiasm?
During halftime break, a girl with dyed brown hair passed out water bottles from her bag to everyone. When she shared a knowing smile with Li Ai, Zhao Xiaorou's grip loosened, and the basketball rolled away.
Li Ai turned and saw her just then. Before she could flee, she stumbled over her own feet, stepping on her shoelaces and undoing them.
As she crouched down flustered to retie them, a pair of slightly dirty basketball shoes appeared before her—it was Li Ai.
He knelt down, mere centimeters from Zhao Xiaorou, and reached out to tie her shoelaces for her.
Zhao Xiaorou had once complained on REGARD that shoelaces were the world's worst invention, as if whoever invented this fashion had intended to create trouble for people.
Especially for those with clumsy hands—when it came to tying butterfly knots or neckties, she never deserved to be called an Internet celebrity.
Li Ai's tone was cold: "You came here to play basketball?"
"Just getting some exercise..."
"Your place is a twenty-minute taxi ride from here. You came specifically to play basketball?"
Zhao Xiaorou fell silent, suddenly realizing her sharp tongue had failed her. Normally, she never held back with any of her ex-boyfriends.
Yet with Li Ai crouching before her, not even looking up as he delivered his emotionless questioning, though she could have summoned a hundred retorts, she just remained dumbly crouching, watching him carefully tie the knot—even the fiercest men still tied their shoelaces in butterfly bows.
"Have you really been that busy lately?"
"Yeah. Basketball is part of my rehab. Took on some renovation cases—dealing with construction crews, it's all a bit tedious."
"Not avoiding me?"
"Avoid?" Li Ai gave a hollow smile. "What would there be to avoid?"
"I broke up with Ma Liang."
"I know..."
Her heartbeat accelerated until her whole voice trembled with unshed tears: "I miss you..."
Li Ai's hands stilled for a second before he stood up: "I'm not your comfort zone."
"I didn't mean anything else by that..." She thought she'd confidently deliver a whole speech: about being an independent woman finally ready to try love, how she'd been deceived by Ma Liang in the end, how she was here now for friendship... None of it was true.
The Zhao Xiaorou who could once speak fluently without preparation had never been so tongue-tied, her mind never so chaotic and disorganized, her teeth actually chattering.
She struggled to formulate words while Li Ai waited motionless for her explanation. In the end, she just picked up the mud-splattered basketball: "I should go..."Zhao Xiaorou, who had meticulously chosen her outfit and deliberately bared her legs, now completely forgot why she had dressed up. The basketball she held dirtied her hands, and her mind went blank. Under the clear night sky, the pale yet enchanting moonlight shone upon her. Not watching her step, she missed a stair and tumbled down, scraping her knees and arms raw across twelve steps.
The ball rolled farther away—a slippery friendship she only picked up when necessary.
Dejectedly, she thought of how she had once mocked Hu Xiu’s disheartened state—now she understood it firsthand.
A hand appeared beside her—it was Li Ai. Her heart raced wildly. The thought that Li Ai might assume she had done this on purpose made her shrink inwardly—
This series of unscripted dramas had thrust her back onto the stage of pretense.
She had long lost the will to keep up the act.
"Can you get up?"
Her ankle had already turned a deep purple. Pushing herself up, she winced in pain but refused Li Ai’s help: "I’m fine. Go play ball."
"Like this? No way." Li Ai bent down. "You’ve sprained it. Let’s get a taxi at the intersection and go to the Sixth Hospital’s emergency room."
"Really, it’s no trouble."
Li Ai didn’t budge. "As if one more trouble from you would make a difference."
The walk to the intersection was barely two hundred meters. Resting her head against the gray hoodie, Zhao Xiaorou caught Li Ai’s scent, heard his breathing—so close, yet so unfamiliar.
She had imagined countless times that Li Ai would always appear by her side like a legendary hero—his body, his warmth, everything would eventually belong to her.
But now, clinging to his arm, she dared not hold tighter or say another word. Tears silently fell into her palms, wiped into her sleeves, some soaking into the hoodie before she could catch them—she couldn’t let him know.
She no longer wanted to make any move in front of Li Ai that could be mistaken for affectation.
Just then, rain began to fall, growing heavier until it poured as they dashed ten meters to the taxi, drenching her hair and cheeks—Thank God.
After watching a play and having dinner with Diao Zhiyu, they had considered visiting Zhao Xiaorou’s Escape Room, but Diao Zhiyu seemed uninterested—
Lately, whenever Escape Rooms or Live Action Role Playing Games were mentioned, he appeared indifferent. As rain dripped from the sky, Diao Zhiyu remarked, "This rain is light; we probably won’t get wet walking home."
Within three seconds, it turned into a downpour. He opened his jacket, pulling Hu Xiu into his embrace as they stood under an awning waiting for the rain to stop. Diao Zhiyu chuckled awkwardly, "Did I just jinx it?"
Listening to the boy’s heartbeat, Hu Xiu thought how intoxicating it felt to crave love.
Hugging him tighter, she said, "About what I suggested before—becoming an idol—I apologize."
"Why bring that up now?"
It was a topic from a month ago, one he seemed to think unnecessary to revisit. Yet, seeing his indifferent expression, Hu Xiu knew he had been waiting for it to resurface.
After all, sweet words and intimate moments were merely painkillers—the underlying issue wouldn’t heal on its own if left untreated.
"I only saw the glamour of that industry and never seriously considered your choices.
Encouraging you to do something you dislike when you’re so lost—I wasn’t thinking enough about you."Diao Zhiyu fell silent for a moment, as if watching the rain, before finally speaking after a long pause: "Do you know what I like most about you?"
"I don't know..."
"You understand me completely. You seem to know exactly what I need at every stage...
You're too clever. Sometimes this intelligence and insight frighten me, yet I have to admit you're always right.
Back on the Snowpiercer, I was already somewhat afraid, wondering how this girl could predict my next move, almost reading my thoughts while always being one step ahead, constantly surprising me - like when you licked me...
I love your unpredictability and freshness, but these same qualities scare me. When you said I'd make a good idol actor and encouraged me to try, I knew you wanted to place me on a pedestal, because that's where I belong. Even in such circumstances, you never showed the slightest intention of hiding my selfish aspects."
The rain grew heavier. Diao Zhiyu took an umbrella from his bag, holding it mostly over Hu Xiu's head: "Let's stop talking - the rain's coming down too hard. Let's go home."
The two seemed to have a rain-attracting constitution. Hu Xiu raised her voice to compete with the rainfall: "Don't worry about money, I can support you. If you want to be a stage actor, or work as a Script Murder NPC, I'll support you!"
"Really?"
"Mm! If this is a low point, just treat it as an extended vacation."
"Then—what you said earlier, did you mean it?"
"What?" Hu Xiu stopped walking, freezing in the rain.
"That you don't love me—is that true?"
"Of course not!" The rain beat fiercely against the umbrella. Hu Xiu halted, her heart suddenly turning cold—he'd been dwelling on this all along.
"When you said those words, I began to wonder whether you like me, or the commodity version of me.
Don't think I don't understand idols—they're essentially products, manipulated puppets.
Before, you couldn't forget Qin Xiaoyi. Maybe it's because I reminded you of his soul that moved you. But your recent words suddenly made me feel that perhaps what you love is just my exterior.
No different from how that red-haired sister liked Qin Xiao's white suit—I'm a living person."
"I'm sorry..."
"There's nothing to apologize for. It's just that thinking you don't love me that much... makes me very sad."
He smiled. It was the same smile Qin Xiaoyi would wear when Lin Qiumei said "I only see him as a younger brother"—the subtle curve of lips and shift in gaze.
That faint, concealed disappointment—she understood it now. That spark had returned.
The unwillingness of loving without being loved in return, that expression of accepting reality while powerless to change it—this was what fascinated her.
You don't know how much I love you. From the moment the iron gate of Snowpiercer opened like fate itself, my heart has never stopped yearning for you. The humility of maxing out credit cards just for another glimpse of you, fantasizing about interactions. The bittersweet ache of being teased by you only to be left with emptiness.
The blushing adolescence rediscovered because of you. The explosive joy pumping through my heart because you showed even slight interest in me. Then you traveling thousands of miles to appear at the station for me...
The emotion from back then has never ceased. But only when I saw the flickering light in your eyes did I understand—I've become your safe harbor.
And this very fact is damaging your pride as an actor, extinguishing your spark.How could I let you become mediocre because of me? Someday you'll realize you're trapped in love because you met me—someone longing for stability—during your most spirited years. But do you truly crave tranquility?
Diao Zhiyu's back was drenched. She pushed the umbrella handle toward him, letting the pouring rain soak her neck, making her shiver. "Diao Zhiyu, from the moment I started liking you until now, you've long noticed my pace, haven't you?
I rewatched Snowpiercer so many times just to see you again, yet never contacted you—I was waiting for you to make the first move...
You're more naive than I imagined. Do you remember how I saw you on the balcony but didn't come downstairs?
Remember that kiss with Pei Zhen in Snowpiercer? I have my own script when it comes to you.
My fondness for you is real, and so is my concern when you're not at your best.
You're right—without Qin Xiaoyi's Role, during this low point, my admiration for you is indeed lacking just a bit.
If you truly want me to be wildly infatuated with you again, you need to prove your worth. Right now, stuck without finding a suitable Role, I'm willing to accompany you..."
"But I don't want this anymore. Accompanying me like this makes me feel defeated. The way you look at me, whether with worry or care, makes me restless."
Holding the umbrella, he lifted his head and took a deep breath, his Adam's apple bobbing several times. When he lowered his head again, he had returned to normal, though his eyes were red and the tip of his nose was flushed.
His voice remained pleasant: "Perhaps we moved from friends to lovers too quickly, and it's my fault you didn't realize I'm not outstanding. So—"
Hu Xiu's nape remained dry, but the soaked part on her back would take time to dry with body heat.
In Diao Zhiyu's world, even with a broken heart, he would never let her suffer any harm.
His lips trembled, avoiding Hu Xiu's gaze, struggling for a long time to find words.
Hu Xiu recalled one of Qin Xiao's endings she'd triggered—before raising his gun to kill everyone, he asked Lin Qiumei: "I'll give you all my money, everything I have. Will you stay with me?"
Only when he had nothing left would Qin Xiao scatter roses and throw money into the air, nearing madness—
This was the truest metaphor for reality: the soul only trembles in agony when losing what matters most.
He truly needed to seek breakthroughs alone to become a better actor—and he had realized this.
"Let's break up..." Diao Zhiyu's eyes were bloodshot. "If this is what you want."
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