Chapter 194: Seeing Clouds Arise
He Yan slept very late that night at the Xiao residence.
This was not Liangzhou Guard, where rooms were separated only by a central gate. Perhaps knowing Xiao Jue was in the next room made He Yan even more nervous. Whether it was her imagination or not, she felt Xiao Jue had become much gentler toward her lately. What might be trivial gestures to him could easily stir the deepest, most hidden emotions within her.
He Yan turned over in bed. Yet, given her own special circumstances, returning to Shuojing brought everything about Xu Zhiheng and He Rufei right before her eyes. Being with anyone would only be a burden. Xiao Jue already carried the deep grievances of the Xiao family; if she were to drag him down further... He Yan took a deep breath, gazing at the canopy above her. It really wasn’t a good idea.
Her mind was filled with all sorts of chaotic thoughts, and it wasn’t until midnight that she finally drifted into a fitful sleep. When she woke the next day, the sun was already high in the sky.
She was momentarily stunned before sitting up and getting out of bed. After changing clothes and opening the door, she saw a chubby little maid, about eight or nine years old, sitting on the steps in the courtyard. The girl was cupping her face, intently watching ants in the corner. Hearing the noise, she looked up, revealing a round face like a New Year painting doll, her eyes narrowing into crescents as she smiled. "Young Master He is awake!"
She patted the dust off her clothes and stood up, trotting over to He Yan. The child was still so young, her short legs moving briskly, and He Yan worried she might stumble.
He Yan asked, "You are..."
"This servant is called Bai Guo," the little girl replied obediently. "The Second Young Master sent me to take care of you, but I wasn’t allowed to enter your room unless you called. Now that you’re awake, I’ll go to the kitchen to fetch breakfast."
Her voice was soft and sweet, and He Yan couldn’t help but pat her head. "Where is your Second Young Master?"
"The Second Young Master went out early this morning," Bai Guo answered with a smile. "Before leaving, he said you needn’t feel constrained. If you don’t wish to stay in the residence, you may leave to attend to your affairs, just return earlier in the evening." She added, as if remembering something, "There are banknotes in the wooden drawer on the table in your room. The Second Young Master said you may use them. If you need anything else, just tell me, and I’ll report it to the First Mistress."
Though the little girl still carried an unmistakable childishness, she spoke with remarkable clarity. He Yan chuckled. "You’re so young. Why would your Second Young Master assign you to serve me?"
"My father is the steward of the residence," Bai Guo declared proudly, puffing out her chest. "The Second Young Master chose me, so I’m sure to take good care of you."
"Thank you, then," He Yan said with a smile.
Bai Guo seemed thrilled, as if this were her first important assignment. "Young Master is the Second Young Master’s friend. There’s no need to thank this servant. I’ll go to the kitchen now. Please wait a moment. Hot water is in the silver kettle by the courtyard gate. If you wish to wash your face, you can pour it yourself. The Second Young Master said you don’t like others touching your things, so small tasks like pouring water don’t require my help." She stuck out her tongue and scampered off.He Yan watched her retreating figure and thought, Xiao Jue had indeed been thoughtful. Finding such a young girl—simple and innocent—even if she noticed something unusual, she likely wouldn’t suspect anything beyond the surface. If he had sent someone clever and sharp-witted instead, what if they accidentally discovered her true identity?
She lowered her head and chuckled softly, then went to fetch water from the place Bai Guo had mentioned. Returning to her room, she washed up.
Just as she finished, Bai Guo entered carrying a food basket. Stepping over the threshold, she placed the basket on the table. “After you finish eating, just leave the basket here. I’ll take care of it. If you need anything else, I’ll come back in.” Without waiting for He Yan to respond, she quickly retreated again.
He Yan: “…”
She truly wondered what Xiao Jue had said to her.
The meal consisted of plain congee and simple dishes, much like the previous night—not extravagant, yet every detail reflected care and refinement. After finishing, He Yan placed the empty bowls and plates back into the basket. She straightened her clothes and walked over to the table, remembering what Bai Guo had said earlier. Pulling open the wooden drawer, she found a thick stack of banknotes inside.
She had assumed Bai Guo meant at most one or two banknotes, but she hadn’t expected Xiao Jue to be so generous. This amount of silver would be enough to pay a dowry for a young lady. Damn these privileged noble sons, He Yan thought indignantly. No wonder when Xiao Jue went to buy clothes in Jiyang, he didn’t even blink at spending a hundred taels on Mermaid Silk.
Having money truly meant one could do as they pleased.
He Yan left the banknotes untouched, closed the drawer, and stepped out of the room.
Her memory was sharp, and she knew the way from this courtyard to the main gate of Xiao Manor. Along the way, she didn’t encounter Bai Rongwei or Xiao Jing. The other servants, perhaps having been instructed by Xiao Jue in advance, paid her no attention, focusing solely on their tasks. It was as if He Yan’s presence in the Xiao household was entirely natural, as if she had long lived there and was a member of the family.
Without much effort, He Yan exited through the main gate of Xiao Manor.
As soon as she stepped outside, the bright sunlight dazzled her eyes. Squinting slightly, she set off in a certain direction.
Before she left the capital to join the army, she had already won a large sum of money at Letong Manor and sent He Yun Sheng to school. Now, over a year had passed, and she wondered if He Yun Sheng was still studying at that school. She couldn’t go directly to the He residence, as the neighbors had watched the eldest Miss He grow up, and even dressed as a man, she might still be recognized. He Yun Sheng’s classmates at school had never seen He Yan, so it seemed safer to go there instead.
The timing was just right. Without much difficulty, He Yan arrived at the entrance of “Helu Academy.” Helu Academy couldn’t compare to Virtuous Prosperity Academy, but among ordinary families, it was considered a decent school. In Great Wei, where literature was valued over martial prowess, Helu Academy not only taught the classics but also had instructors for martial arts—something He Yan valued most. He Yun Sheng had started his literary education a bit late and wasn’t particularly inclined toward it, but he was quite skilled in martial arts. If he chose to pursue a path as a warrior in the future, it wouldn’t be impossible.
It was early morning, the best time for studying, and the sound of recitations drifted from Helu Academy. Since He Yan wasn’t a student there, she couldn’t enter directly. Instead, she ordered a cup of tea at a nearby teahouse and waited for about an hour. When classes ended and the teachers began to leave, she took the opportunity to climb over the wall and slip into the academy.From time to time, students leaving school would emerge from the academy gates. He Yan was just thinking of finding a young man to ask where He Yun Sheng might be when, without realizing it, she had already walked up to the classroom window. From inside came bursts of laughter from the youths, tinged with malicious teasing. "Brother Yun Sheng, are you really not coming with us today? It's Brother Wang's birthday today!"
Another voice chimed in, "Why would Brother Yun Sheng bother with the likes of us? When have you ever seen him join us in our fun? Brother Yun Sheng excels in martial arts, and with such a handsome face, he’s so popular with the girls. Who knows, he might even land a good marriage in the future and rise to great heights. Why would he waste time hanging around with us?"
Another round of jeers followed. He Yan frowned slightly. Such teasing was truly hurtful. He Yun Sheng was proud and quick-tempered—how could he endure this? Would he end up in a fight?
Worried, she peeked inside. At a table surrounded by the youths stood a young man in blue robes. He kept his head down, tidying up the books on the table, and from start to finish, not a single word escaped his lips.
He had actually endured such humiliation in silence.
Perhaps feeling as though they were punching cotton without any response, the youths soon grew bored with their antics and drifted out of the classroom in twos and threes. Meanwhile, He Yun Sheng finished packing his books and stood up to leave.
He Yan followed him from a distance.
He Yun Sheng entered a deserted alley. He had only taken a few steps when he suddenly sensed a swift gust of wind from behind. Instinctively, he turned and struck back with a palm. His palm didn’t land on anyone but instead met another palm—soft yet resilient—that silently blocked his strike and effortlessly pushed him back several steps.
"Who’s there?" he shouted warily.
The next moment, a familiar, laughing voice rang out. "Good lad, it seems your year at the academy wasn’t wasted. Your strength has grown quite a bit."
At the sound of that voice, He Yun Sheng froze, hardly daring to believe his ears. The palm before him withdrew, revealing the face of the person behind it—a face with features somewhat similar to his own, one that had often surfaced in his thoughts over the past year; a face both beautiful and familiar, yet somehow strange.
His sister… He Yan.
"You…" He Yun Sheng’s voice trembled.
He Yan slapped him on the head and then ruffled his hair. "What 'you'? Call me 'sister'!"
"How did you come back?" He Yun Sheng finally seemed to snap back to reality, rubbing his eyes. It was only then that this young man showed a glimpse of the boy He Yan remembered. He stepped forward, grasping her elbows as if to confirm whether he was dreaming or awake. "You’re really back? He Yan! When did you return? Do you have any idea how worried Father and I have been this past year?" His eyes reddened, and his voice choked with emotion.
He Yan looked at the young man before her, feeling a pang of emotion. Young people grew quickly, and after a year and a half, He Yun Sheng had shot up even taller than before. Now, she had to look up to meet his eyes. He had also grown much thinner, appearing tall, slender, and upright—almost like an adult already.
He Yan grabbed his arm and pulled him along. "This isn’t the place to talk. Come with me."
…In the tearoom, delicate pastries were laid out before him, yet He Yun Sheng had no desire to eat them at all. The person across from him insistently pushed the plate closer, saying, "Don't you love these? Have more."
He Yun Sheng stiffened his neck and replied, "I don’t like sweets."
He Yan rolled her eyes inwardly, recalling who it was that had drooled over the pastries He Sui had given her when they went up the mountain to chop wood. She looked at the young man before her—children grow up and learn to protect their pride.
It was strange, really. She had met Cheng Li Su and Song Taotao, both younger than her, but only with He Yun Sheng did she feel an inexplicable, genuine attachment. This attachment had been well-hidden during her time in Liang Province, but upon seeing He Yun Sheng in person, it surged uncontrollably. She only wanted to give him the best and hoped he would thrive in the future. Perhaps it was because this body belonged to the eldest Miss He—the wonder of blood ties lay precisely in this.
"You still haven’t told me, how did you come back?" He Yun Sheng stared at He Yan, hesitating slightly. "And why do you look like this now?"
He Yan smiled at him. "Like this... is this not good?"
He Yun Sheng didn’t say it was bad, nor did he say it was good. He just found it odd. He was used to seeing He Yan in dresses and had seen her in men’s clothing once before, but even then, it wasn’t as natural as now. If He Yan weren’t his sister, and he saw someone like this on the street, he would never believe this person was a woman.
He Yan was quite pretty. Even during the times when their relationship was at its worst, He Yun Sheng had to admit this fact. However, that beauty had always seemed somewhat frivolous and cheap, especially when she went to great lengths to squeeze money from He Sui to buy clothes and accessories for herself. Now, He Yan was slightly darker, almost without a trace of makeup. Rather than pretty, she now carried an air of spirited elegance. That brightness and vitality made her eyes shine like stars.
Actually... she was still pretty, even more captivating than before.
But that wasn’t the point at all. He Yun Sheng snapped back to reality and said, "Are you still in the military camp? Wait, if you were, how could you have run out?"
"Your sister here is exceptionally capable and highly regarded by her superiors," He Yan took a sip of tea. "During my enlistment, I was fortunate enough to be granted a minor official position. Now, I’m neither the best nor the worst."
"How could you become an official?" He Yun Sheng was startled. "Don’t you know you’re a woman? Even if you hide it for a while, you can’t hide it forever! If your identity is discovered later, you’re finished! No, no," He Yun Sheng grew anxious. "You must resign immediately, tomorrow at the latest!"
He Yan tilted her head and looked at him. "Aren’t you going to ask what position I was granted?"
"No matter what position, you can’t stay!" He Yun Sheng said impatiently. "Even if you were the prime minister, it wouldn’t be allowed. Besides, the higher your rank, the greater the danger. Even for the sake of wealth and glory, you can’t risk your life. You must resign!"
He Yan was taken aback, momentarily lost in thought.Even a child like He Yun Sheng could understand this reasoning, so how could the two He family officials in the court fail to grasp it? Substituting one person for another was clearly an extremely dangerous matter. Once discovered, she would face certain death, yet the He family still made her do it—and had her do so for so many years.
It turned out it was nothing more than... human greed, an unwillingness to part with a bit of wealth and status. Or perhaps, in their eyes, He Yan's life was merely a bargaining chip, worthless compared to the potential glory and prospects they could gain.
"Hey, are you even listening to me?" He Yun Sheng waved his hand in front of her face.
He Yan looked up and smiled. "Of course I know all that. I will definitely resign from my post, but now is not the time. I still have some matters to attend to. Once they're done, I'll resign."
Just as He Yun Sheng was about to ask what those matters were, He Yan spoke again unexpectedly. She asked, "Enough about me. What about you all? How has Father been during my absence from Shuojing? Have the Fan family come to cause trouble?"
He Yun Sheng's expression darkened. "Those scoundrels—how could they not cause trouble?"
It turned out that after He Yan enlisted in the army, the murderer of Fan Cheng was never found. The Fan family vented their anger on the He family. Although He Yan was also a "victim," precisely because her body was never found, there was no way to verify anything. Fan Cheng's family often caused trouble for He Sui at the drill grounds, falsely accusing him of misconduct, which eventually cost He Sui his position as a captain.
Fortunately, not long after, a merchant family in Shuojing City wanted to hire a guard for their estate. Learning that He Sui had once been a captain and was skilled in martial arts, they invited him to work for them. Although it sounded less respectable than being a captain, merchant families were generous, offering ample silver.
He Yan was somewhat skeptical. "Ample silver, but aren't you wearing old clothes? From what your classmates said, it sounded like they resented you for not spending money with them."
He Yun Sheng looked at her incredulously. "You actually eavesdropped..."
"Shh," He Yan chuckled. "I was just passing by and happened to hear it. Are you saving the silver instead of using it, perhaps to accumulate a dowry for you?"
He Yun Sheng remained silent. He couldn't tell He Yan that, although the family's finances had improved significantly, he and He Sui had discussed it: He Yan had enlisted in the army, and no one knew when she would return. A young woman out there must have endured many hardships—just surviving was an achievement. If she returned older or was looked down upon by others, she might not marry. By saving more silver, if He Yan ever wanted to live alone in Shuojing in the future, having more money would make life easier.
Seeing He Yun Sheng silent, He Yan thought she had guessed correctly and laughed. "Don't be so frugal! I do have a salary now, after all." She took out two banknotes from her pocket and whispered, "We won a battle earlier. This is the spoils of war, a reward from His Majesty. Take this money, go back, and make new clothes for Father and yourself. Treat yourselves better. People rely on clothes, horses rely on saddles. If you dress well, the girl you like might take notice, right? Young girls all like handsome men. Although your face is handsome, your personality isn't very likable, so you need clothes to help you out."
He Yun Sheng held the two banknotes for a moment before asking, "You won a battle? Did you go to the battlefield? Which one? The Jiyang naval battle, the Liangzhou Garrison battle, or the Rundu battle?"He Yan hadn't expected him to be keeping track of these matters. She scratched her head and said, "Well, actually... I fought in all those battles."
He Yun Sheng gasped sharply.
When He Yan had left in such a hurry, she had only left a letter behind. Later, He Yun Sheng had asked around and learned that all the recruits from Shuojing at that time had been sent to Liangzhou Guard. After that, he paid constant attention to news from Liangzhou Guard. Hearing that the journey was long and arduous, and many frail individuals had died along the way, he prayed daily, hoping their late mother in heaven would protect He Yan and keep her safe. He also heard that Liangzhou Guard was bitterly cold and training was exhausting, so he could only hope He Yan would be assigned as a cook. When Rida Muzi led troops to Liangzhou Garrison, he and He Sui didn't sleep a wink all night. Later, they comforted each other, saying He Yan was surely fine—she couldn't even lift a sword and was clever besides, so she might not even encounter the enemy.
The naval battle at Jiyang... the defense of Rundu... In short, ever since He Yan joined the army, He Sui and He Yun Sheng had lived in constant anxiety. If not for their fear that the Fan family might trace He Yan's whereabouts, the two of them would have packed their bags and rushed to Liang Province themselves.
"Didn't I send you messages?" He Yan asked.
He Yun Sheng frowned, thinking for a moment. "There were two times, but they were very brief. They were just notes tossed into the house, and we never got to see you in person, so we had no idea how you were doing." At this point, he grew both angry and anxious. "What were you thinking back then? How could you even consider joining the army? You're a woman..."
"No one said women can't join the army," He Yan cut him off, weary of his nagging. "And look, I'm safe and sound now, aren't I? By the way, now that Father is no longer a captain, are the Fan family still harassing you?"
He Yun Sheng shook his head. "They stopped coming a few months ago." He added sarcastically, "They probably realized there was no point in continuing to beat and curse us. I heard the Fan patriarch has another son now, so he probably doesn't care about the previous one anymore."
He Yan couldn't help but click her tongue. How old was Master Fan to be having another child at his age? It was truly hard to know what to say.
"Come back with me," He Yun Sheng said, looking at He Yan. "Father will be home tonight. He'll be overjoyed to see you."
He Yan shook her head. "I can't go back yet."
"Why not?"
"Yun Sheng," He Yan said patiently, looking at him, "my current situation is delicate. All the neighbors have seen my face. If I'm recognized... it would cause trouble. Even if I were to meet Father, it shouldn't be at home. Besides, now isn't the right time." She pressed the banknote into He Yun Sheng's hand. "I came today just to see you. Knowing you're doing alright puts my mind at ease. Tell Father I'm fine when you see him. We'll find a place to meet in a few days."
He Yun Sheng felt aggrieved. After finally seeing her, they still had to hide and sneak around as if they were doing something shameful. But deep down, he knew He Yan was right.
"What about you?" He pushed the banknote back into her hand. "Don't you need money too? Keep it yourself. And where are you staying now? An inn? Inns aren't safe—I've heard there are many shady ones..."He Yan couldn't be bothered to keep pushing the banknote back and forth with him, so she directly stuffed it into his arms, saying, "I have plenty more where that came from—a thick stack of them. I can use them whenever I want, so there's no need for a kid like you to worry about it. Besides, I'm not staying at an inn anymore. I've asked someone to help me find a house to rent. Until then, I'm staying at a friend's place."
"Friend?" He Yun Sheng perked up his ears, looking at her warily as he eagerly pressed, "What friend? Someone you met at Liangzhou Guard? How old are they? Male or female?"
He Yan: "..."
Why did this suddenly feel like a father interrogating his daughter about staying out overnight? She thought to herself that if she mentioned Xiao Jue's name, He Yun Sheng would probably follow her back to Xiao Manor tonight—after all, she still remembered He Yun Sheng's words vividly.
"If I were a woman, I would only admire him alone!"
He Yan's mouth twitched, unable to imagine the scene of He Yun Sheng and Xiao Jue standing together. After a long pause, she finally said, "Why does a child care so much? In any case, he is a great figure."
(End of Chapter)