Legend of the Female General

Chapter 181: Missed

He Yan stared blankly at Yan He, her mind a complete void. In that moment, she didn’t know how to respond. Only one thought surged repeatedly in her heart.

How could it be?

How could this be?

“No… that can’t be right.” He Yan tried her best to make her expression appear relaxed. “Commander Xiao isn’t the kind of warm-hearted person.”

“I knew you’d react like this,” Yan He said impatiently. “That’s why I’ve been too lazy to bring it up all these years. No one would believe it anyway.”

“But I can swear on my life—this is absolutely true. Back when we were studying at the academy, that lunatic Xiao Huaijin actually wrote notes to He Rufei every day, giving him pointers on swordsmanship.” He seemed to recall those past events, his eyes still filled with disbelief. “Every single day. It was terrifying.”

Back then, he was still young and full of ambition. Before Xiao Huaijin came down from the mountain, Yan He had always taken first place at the Virtuous Prosperity Academy. But after Xiao Huaijin entered the academy, Yan He could only be second.

This feeling was truly infuriating. It would have been one thing if he had never been first and had always been second, or if he had been first and remained first. But to have been first before and then become second afterward, with no chance of ever surpassing him again—that was a blow to one’s confidence. It made others think that Yan He simply couldn’t compare to Xiao Jue.

They were all prodigies, and who could truly accept being inferior? Yan He wished he could spend six hours a day studying desperately and the other six hours competing with Xiao Jue. After all, every competition brought new insights—knowing yourself and your enemy meant winning every battle. Unfortunately, this Second Young Master Xiao was not a patient person. He could ignore even the instructors’ words, and as for Yan He, he was completely disregarded.

If Yan He challenged him eight or ten times, Xiao Jue might respond once if he was in a good mood. Yan He was arrogant too, but compared to Xiao Jue’s calm and indifferent aloofness, he still fell slightly short.

He was nearly driven mad by Xiao Jue.

So, in his youth, Yan He lived a carefree and smooth life, with Xiao Jue being his only setback. At that time, he believed his lifelong wish was to defeat Xiao Jue.

At the Virtuous Prosperity Academy, the competition for first and second place was fierce, but the positions of last and second-to-last were also pursued by many—for example… Lin Shuanghe and He Rufei.

Lin Shuanghe was fine. As the heir to a family of imperial physicians, his ambitions lay elsewhere, so it didn’t matter if he excelled in neither literature nor martial arts. But the eldest young master of the He family was strange. He Rufei was exceptionally diligent and earnest, making even the smallest progress and trying every possible method. For someone like him, Yan He at most looked down on him but didn’t exactly dislike him. A genius like Yan He viewed ordinary people with a certain sense of superiority.

However, one thing changed Yan He’s opinion.

He discovered He Rufei practicing swordsmanship at night by chance. Rather than following He Rufei’s footsteps, it would be more accurate to say he was paying attention to Xiao Jue’s every move. One night, Yan He saw Xiao Jue sitting in the backyard, watching He Rufei practice swordsmanship. He racked his clever brain for a long time but couldn’t figure out the reason behind it.What was Xiao Jue doing? Unable to sleep and coming out to watch a performance? Or did he think this clumsy He Rufei could make him laugh? But if that were the case, one or two days would have been enough—why come every night? No wonder he always slept during the day at the academy; it turned out he wasn’t sleeping at night at all.

Xiao Jue accompanied He Rufei in practicing swordplay every night, but he never said or did anything—just drank tea. He Rufei, for his part, was remarkably patient. Even when being watched like a monkey, he never lost his temper, diligently focusing on his own practice.

Yan He, for reasons unknown, also followed them out every night, secretly observing. He was convinced Xiao Jue must have some ulterior motive and would never waste his time on something so pointless. Looking back on his younger self years later, Yan He couldn’t help but cringe. If anyone else had been watching them in the backyard back then, they would have thought the Virtuous Prosperity Academy was raising three madmen.

But at the time, Yan He had only one thought: he wanted to see what Xiao Jue was really up to. And indeed, he eventually discovered a clue.

He Rufei’s swordsmanship improved day by day.

This was strange. He Rufei’s instructors at the academy were excellent, yet he had never progressed this quickly before. But during his nightly practice, He Rufei corrected the glaring flaws from the previous day each time. Compared to when he started, his swordsmanship had made a tremendous leap forward.

Yan He refused to believe He Rufei possessed such natural talent. After pondering it for a long time, he finally caught Xiao Jue leaving a note on He Rufei’s desk.

He unfolded the letter, which was densely covered with critiques of the previous night’s swordplay and suggestions for improvement. Yan He remarked sourly, “You’re even more meticulous than the academy’s instructors.”

Xiao Jue glanced at him coldly and replied indifferently, “Following me every night—are you trying to imitate those women outside?”

The women outside were all admirers of Xiao Jue. They would occasionally “pass by” the academy for no reason, drawn by his peerlessly handsome face and his aloof, languid demeanor, which captivated many.

Yan He tossed the paper onto the table, looking at him with disgust. “Who’s like those women?”

As Xiao Jue turned to leave, Yan He hurried after him. Unable to contain his frustration, he asked, “You accompany him in the courtyard every night just to give him pointers on swordplay?”

“You follow me every night just to watch me give him pointers on swordplay?” Xiao Jue retorted, unfazed.

“You’re insane!” Yan He exclaimed incredulously. “You’re actually wasting your time on someone like that!”

Though he disliked Xiao Jue, Yan He had to admit he was exceptionally talented. Just as Yan He regarded Xiao Jue as his rival, he believed Xiao Jue should see him the same way—practicing diligently every day to maintain his top position. Yet, it seemed Xiao Jue was neither diligent nor focused on their rivalry. Instead, he spent his nights watching the academy’s worst student practice swordplay and offering guidance? Yan He couldn’t understand it and felt infuriated. Did this mean Xiao Jue considered him less noteworthy than He Rufei?

What kind of nonsense was this!

“Hey, are you even listening to me?” Seeing Xiao Jue ignore him, Yan He grew anxious and stepped in front of him. “Why are you wasting your time on that useless person?”

“Is that so?” Xiao Jue’s beautiful eyes swept over him as he climbed onto the rockery, found a spot to lie down, rested his hands behind his head, and closed his eyes as if dozing. “I don’t think so.”Not feeling what? Not feeling that he's a waste?

"You..." Yan He fumed, "You give him pointers every day, and he's only improved a little. With so many people in Virtuous Prosperity Academy, why did you pick He Rufei? Are you trying to satisfy yourself by teaching the last-place student to become first? Let me tell you, give up now! With He Rufei's aptitude, it's simply impossible."

Xiao Jue: "I'm not that bored."

His indifferent attitude made Yan He even angrier. He turned to leave, "I'm going to tell He Rufei to stop hogging you. Using the guidance of the top student in Virtuous Prosperity Academy and still practicing like this—it's laughable!"

From behind came Xiao Jue's lazy voice: "Sparring."

Yan He stopped in his tracks: "What?"

"If you come to spar with me in the future, I'll agree once for every three times," he said without opening his eyes, his lashes casting shadows on his jade-like skin as he leaned against the rockery, looking like a handsome, dashing youth from a painting. "The condition is secrecy."

Yan He stood there, torn with inner conflict, but ultimately unable to resist the temptation of Xiao Jue agreeing to spar with him. He gritted his teeth and said, "Twice."

"Deal."

The sunlight beat down on the courtyard, hot and fierce. Yan He sighed and said, "Fine. As the price of this exchange, I'll keep it secret for him and not tell He Rufei."

Even after so many years, Yan He still felt a surge of anger when recounting this. If He Rufei had made rapid progress in swordsmanship under Xiao Jue's guidance, it might have been different, but his improvement was hardly that of a genius. In Yan He's eyes, it seemed like a waste of Xiao Jue's careful teaching. Yet Xiao Jue was incredibly patient with He Rufei—though he often made excuses to avoid sparring with Yan He, he devoted himself wholeheartedly to guiding He Rufei every day.

Yan He didn't know where his resentment and jealousy came from.

Perhaps it was the frustration of seeing someone of mediocre talent receive guidance from a master, only to squander it.

"He did manage to make a name for himself later," Yan He snorted. "But in my opinion, if it were me receiving Xiao Huaijin's guidance, I would have achieved far more. I thought he at least lived up to the teaching, but this Battle of Huayuan has left me speechless. He's still the same as before. I think he should drop the title of Flying Goose General sooner rather than later, to avoid becoming a laughingstock."

"Hey," Yan He glanced at the person beside him, "why aren't you saying anything?"

He Yan was startled. The sun was dazzling her eyes, making her dizzy—whether from Yan He's words or something else, she murmured, "I'm just... very surprised."

"Surprised? When it first happened, I thought Xiao Huaijin had gone mad," Yan He said sarcastically. "And logically, since He Rufei owed Xiao Huaijin such a huge favor, I thought they were close. But looking at the past few years, they haven't been particularly close. Now that Rundu is in trouble, and Huayuan is so close to Rundu, Xiao Huaijin wrote to me instead of seeking out He Rufei? It seems Xiao Huaijin has kept this secret all along, and He Rufei still doesn't know. Though it's hard to say—after all, it was many years ago. Now that they're both equally renowned, it's only natural for He Rufei to feel competitive."Yan He truly seized every opportunity to smear He Rufei to death, but He Yan had no mind to argue with him now, her thoughts and eyes were filled with... back then, her swordsmanship was secretly guided by Xiao Jue?

She had always thought it was some kind-hearted teacher at the Virtuous Prosperity Academy who, seeing her poor swordsmanship, had taught her in secret. She had always been deeply grateful for this. If not for the incident at the He family that forced her to leave home and join the army, she would have seen who that teacher was. Not being able to properly thank him had always been a regret in He Yan's heart.

But now, from Yan He's mouth, she learned this unbelievable truth—it was actually Xiao Jue?

If it was Xiao Jue, then everything made sense. His skills were no worse than those of the teachers at the Virtuous Prosperity Academy. He Yan had never considered Xiao Jue, simply because his temperament was not that of someone who enjoyed helping others, and besides, her relationship with him was not particularly close.

So back then, when he came to the backyard every night to watch her practice swordsmanship and drink tea, it wasn't for amusement... but to guide her progress.

He Yan took a deep breath. How could she only realize this now?

"What's that expression on your face?" Yan He frowned. "You look quite excited?"

"I..." He Yan coughed lightly and said, "I just think Commander Xiao is truly a good person."

"What good person? I think he's sick. That guy was outstanding in everything at the academy. Who could have guessed his judgment would be so poor?" Yan He patted the dust off his clothes and stood up, grabbing the Square Sky Halberd beside him. "Talking about He Rufei just ruins my mood. Forget it, I'm going back to practicing my halberd. What about you?"

He Yan's thoughts were in turmoil, and she naturally had no mind to watch this man flaunt his skills in front of her. So she said, "In that case, I won't disturb General Yan any longer. This official will return to my room first."

He Yan turned and left.

...

The sky gradually darkened.

Xiao Jue came out of the hall, and Li Kuang wiped the sweat from his forehead.

Because of Qiluo's matter, he felt too ashamed to face He Yan. Seeing He Yan made him feel nervous and wary. He had thought speaking with Xiao Jue would be easier, but this Right Army Commander was even more difficult to handle than the still-young Wu Anlang.

Xiao Jue carefully inquired about everything that had happened in Rundu these days, including the earlier incident of placing straw men on the city walls and the night raid on the enemy camp to burn their provisions. Li Kuang did not take credit for himself and fully disclosed that it was all He Yan's idea. As for the captured women and Qiluo, Xiao Jue had already seen them. When Li Kuang recounted the events again, this young commander did not show the same agitation as He Yan. Instead, he appeared quite calm, but that calmness made Li Kuang feel even more uneasy, as if sitting on pins and needles.

After thoroughly questioning everything about Rundu, Li Kuang also learned that their group would set off for Shuojing in a few days. Li Kuang felt a great sense of relief in his heart. No matter what, the siege of Rundu had been resolved. Yan He would leave a portion of his troops here, but the Wutuo People likely wouldn't dare to return.

The city was ultimately defended... but in a way, it was also lost.

Li Kuang understood one thing very clearly: he had lost the people's trust.

His position as the city's commander would not last much longer.

The usually tall and burly man sat alone in the room. After a long while, he buried his face in his hands and silently shed tears.

This was the punishment he deserved.

...

The night in Rundu was cool.

The heat of the day completely faded by night, yet due to the famine in the city, which had left the vegetation sparse and bare, there was a desolation that felt more like autumn.Drink Autumn was placed on the table. Xiao Jue turned around and had just taken off his outer robe when he heard someone knocking on the door outside—polite and respectful, one knock after another.

He paused briefly. "Come in."

The door opened, and He Yan stood at the doorway, looking at him as she asked, "Commander, may I come in?"

Back at Liangzhou Guard, this person never knocked. When she wanted to find someone, she would even skip the main gate for convenience. She would lightly tap on the middle gate a few times, regardless of whether anyone responded, treating it as if she had already announced herself. Then, with practiced ease, she would slip through the door, pop her head out from behind it, and call out with a bright smile, enunciating each word clearly, "Commander!"

Now, after just over a month in Rundu, she had become so well-behaved and courteous. Yet, within this courtesy, there was a hint of subtle formality.

Xiao Jue raised an eyebrow slightly, set his outer robe aside, and replied calmly, "What is it?"

He didn’t answer her question of "may I," knowing full well that He Yan would come in on her own. Sure enough, after just a moment of feigned obedience, He Yan naturally walked in and closed the door behind her.

The room appeared luxurious, but given that Rundu now relied entirely on the provisions Yan He had brought, there was naturally no tea. Xiao Jue picked up the white porcelain teapot on the table and poured water into a cup. He Yan walked over and said, "Let me do it."

She took the teapot from Xiao Jue’s hands.

Xiao Jue didn’t refuse. As he handed it over, his fingers accidentally brushed against hers. He Yan’s heart trembled slightly. She looked up at him, but he kept his gaze lowered, his expression unreadable. Pretending nothing had happened, He Yan walked to the other side of the table and slowly poured the water.

Physical contact with Xiao Jue had long since broken countless boundaries. Back at Liangzhou Guard, however, there were many inconveniences, so she had tried her best to ignore it. But now, she was fully aware of many things and understood her own feelings toward Xiao Jue. As the saying goes, "Without desire, one remains strong." With hidden intentions in her heart, she felt increasingly uneasy.

She scolded herself inwardly for being foolish and tried to speak as calmly as possible. "Commander, Brother Lin said today that in a few days, we’ll be returning to Shuojing together."

Xiao Jue sat down at the table. "You don’t want to go back?"

"No," she replied. She had always planned to return to Shuojing. "But why would His Majesty suddenly summon you back to Shuojing? And General Yan as well? If everyone returns to Shuojing, wouldn’t it be dangerous outside?"

The Wutuo People were watching closely. Even if the Emperor was worried about Shuojing’s safety, there was no need to recall all of Great Wei’s fiercest generals. If the Wutuo People were to make a comeback at this time—though unlikely—it was still a risk that couldn’t be ignored.

"We’ll find out when we return," Xiao Jue replied without directly answering her question.

Indeed, it was unwise to speculate before returning. But the real reason she had come wasn’t actually about this matter. She had just wanted to find an excuse to start the conversation.

She handed one cup of tea to Xiao Jue and kept the other for herself. Holding the warm tea in her hands, the girl lowered her head and took a sip. After a moment, she looked up, as if searching for something to say. "Commander, I ran into General Yan during the day."

Xiao Jue hummed in acknowledgment, his eyes fixed on the book in his hands. His attitude these past few days had been strange—cold, yet calm enough to be considered gentle. Gentle, yet he never initiated conversation with He Yan... though, to be fair, he also didn’t go out of his way to cause her trouble.

This subtle sense of distance left He Yan somewhat puzzled."General Yan seems to dislike the Flying Goose General quite a bit," He Yan continued awkwardly, as no one else chimed in. "I sat with him for a while and heard him say that the Commander, the Flying Goose General, and General Yan were actually classmates!"

Her deliberately exaggerated tone made Xiao Jue pause briefly before he replied, "Stay away from him."

At least he was speaking now. He Yan pushed her teacup forward and looked at him. "I asked General Yan why he disliked Young Master He so much, and he told me..." She deliberately drew out her words, watching Xiao Jue's reaction. "It's because the Commander personally instructed the Flying Goose General in swordsmanship every night, so General Yan grew jealous and has resented him all these years." He Yan rested her chin on her hand, feigning confusion as she asked, "So, Commander, did you actually like the Flying Goose General?"

She looked like a curious subordinate probing into her superior's past, but her heart was racing. Though Yan He had said as much, He Yan still wanted to confirm it herself. She didn’t know if Yan He’s words were true, nor did she understand why Xiao Jue had done such a thing.

Xiao Jue closed his book and looked at her calmly. "I am not a cut-sleeve."

"I never said you were," He Yan replied. "What I meant was, did you admire the Flying Goose General? So you helped in secret? Was it really you who instructed her in swordsmanship every night?"

Xiao Jue remained silent. Given his temperament, this was as good as an admission.

He Yan straightened up abruptly, unable to put into words the emotions she felt at that moment. After a long pause, she finally asked, "Why did you instruct him?"

Xiao Jue raised his eyes to look at her. "Why do you ask?"

He Yan lowered her head, hiding the emotions in her eyes. "I just feel it wasn’t worth it for you. From what General Yan said, Young Master He wasn’t particularly outstanding in his studies at the Virtuous Prosperity Academy, neither in academics nor martial arts. I don’t know how the Commander chose him, of all people, to instruct in swordsmanship. And after doing so much, you never told Young Master He? Does Young Master He still not know it was you who helped him back then? Don’t you... don’t you think it was a poor bargain?"

"It was a casual gesture, nothing to dwell on," Xiao Jue said lightly. "What does it matter whether he knows or not?"

He Yan stared straight at him, thinking to herself, It does matter. If I had known it was him earlier... if I had known, perhaps those girlish fantasies would have lingered longer. Perhaps when Xu Zhiheng appeared, I wouldn’t have thrown myself headlong into it. I had been lonely for too long. Xiao Jue was there first... yet I realized my feelings too late.

As if noticing the strangeness in her expression, Xiao Jue’s gaze paused, and he frowned. "You..."

"I just feel so sorry for the Commander," He Yan forced a bright smile. "And this Young Master He, really—even if the Commander wished to remain anonymous and didn’t want others to know, shouldn’t Young Master He have tried to find out who his mysterious benefactor was? He just let it go. He should have discovered you sooner. The reputation he has now, the Commander played a part in it too."

Her urgency made Xiao Jue look at her thoughtfully. Suddenly, the corners of his lips curved slightly. "Actually, he did try to find me."

He Yan was taken aback.

Under the lamplight, his face was calm and handsome, as if recalling scenes from the past. His beautiful dark eyes grew deep, rippling with faint waves, almost enough to drown one in their depths.Xiao Jue had indeed witnessed He Rufei's frantic search for him before. Those conversations written on slips of paper each time expressed gratitude toward him—sincere, anxious, clumsy, and on one occasion, even attempting to grab hold of him.

But how could he possibly be caught? Sitting in the tree, he watched He Rufei pass beneath. Though wearing a mask, he could still imagine the dejected look on the person's face, inexplicably pitiful.

Thus, he finally relented and agreed to let He Rufei see him. Though the outcome might not be a happy one.

"Once he arranged to meet me at the academy."

"And then? Did you meet with her?"

The man, elegant as fine jade, lowered his head and said softly, "I went."

"But he didn't come that night."

Yan He, during his student days, discovered two classmates having extra tutoring sessions: ???!! So gay!!

The Governor: Just socialist brotherly affection, that's all :)

(End of Chapter)