Coming to Myself

Chen Zhaoci gazed at her, tears streaming down his face. His complexion turned pale, and his lips were pressed tightly together.

Fan Jia stared firmly at him, wiping away her own tears as she said, "Now you have the chance to break free from everything in your past, to end that kind of life—turn yourself in to me. Yes, I want you to go to prison. You're only an accomplice, and with the mitigating circumstance of turning yourself in, you'll get a lighter sentence. It'll only be a few years. Even if it's ten years, what does it matter? You'll only be in your thirties when you get out, still young. Have you ever heard the word 'atonement'? You've done some wrong, so go and atone for it.

What's important is that from then on, you won't have to hide in the shadows anymore. You'll be clean, starting over. Find a new job—like a librarian, or open a bookstore. You love reading; you can put your knowledge to use. You can meet girls again, start a family, have a baby. That's what you've always wanted, and you can have it.

But if you keep stubbornly moving forward, continuing to live this kind of hiding life, it won't be long before the police catch you. I'm the weakest one on our team; the others are all much more capable than me. By then, maybe there'll be no turning back. Because if you keep going like this, one day, you won't even recognize yourself anymore!

The choice is in your hands. My life, your life—they're both in your hands. But Chen Zhaoci, I believe in you. When you take me out of here, I'll also lead you out of the gutter. I swear, Zhaoci, I'm a people's police officer. The people's police serve the people—I swear this to you!"

Chen Zhaoci's body, which had been as stubbornly tense as a drawn bow, slowly slumped. He lowered his head, covered his face with his hands, and broke down in sobs.

—

A rope tumbled down from the opening of the cave.

A dagger followed, clattering to the ground.

When Fan Jia crawled out, she was panting heavily. Chen Zhaoci beside her wasn't much better off; he let go of the rope, braced his hands on the ground, and kept his head lowered. The man's originally gloomy, gentle, and violent aura had completely vanished. All that remained was the desolation of someone who had completely broken down.

Fan Jia's heart pounded as she glanced around. It was a cramped, simple room, sparsely furnished with only a table, chairs, and a small bed. Outside the window, it was pitch black, impossible to tell where they were.

Fan Jia asked softly, "Do you have a phone?"

Chen Zhaoci, still with his head down, replied, "Lost it."

Of course—if he still had his phone, You Mingxu and the others would have already tracked them down.

Fan Jia's voice remained gentle: "Then... shall we go?"

He didn't respond, standing up with a silhouette as gloomy as a mountain ridge. Fan Jia stayed silent as well. After a moment, he pulled open the door. A cool breeze swept in, and outside was a vast expanse of darkness, with faint outlines of buildings and scenery visible. Only at that moment did Fan Jia's heart feel like a shaken cola bottle finally having its cap popped off, bubbles bursting out with a "fizz." She knew she had won.

The two of them stepped outside. The surroundings were filled with single-story houses, and there were empty stalls along the roadside. In the distance, buildings of varying heights stood densely packed. Fan Jia hadn't expected Chen Zhaoci to have hidden her in such a densely populated area. But at that moment, the sky was still pitch black, and the narrow, elongated street was completely empty of people.

Before climbing out of the cave opening, Fan Jia had a length of rope in her pocket. She pulled it out and asked, "Can I...?"Chen Zhaoci's eyes had lost all their luster. He stared at the rope in her hands for a few seconds before asking, "Will you keep your word? If I surrender to you now, my sentence will be lighter. Do I still have a chance to start over?"

Fan Jia nodded firmly. Liu Yisha's death had been accidental, Chen Zhaoci hadn't participated in the humiliation, and disposing of the body was something he'd been forced to do by his superior.

"Will you come visit me after I'm imprisoned?" he asked again.

Fan Jia replied, "Yes, I promise."

Only then did he lift his gaze to look at her. "I hope to see you again."

Fan Jia smiled, just smiled, as the night breeze gently brushed through her hair, not saying a word.

Chen Zhaoci extended both hands toward her.

Fan Jia quickly tied a firm knot around his wrists, paused silently for a moment, then pulled down his sleeves to cover the ropes. He remained quiet, simply watching her movements.

"Where are we?" Fan Jia asked.

Chen Zhaoci named a location, and Fan Jia was startled—they were still within that same slum area. Chen Zhaoci had hidden her right under everyone's noses. But Fan Jia wasn't familiar with Huaicheng and was trying hard to orient herself. Just then, Chen Zhaoci spoke up: "About twenty minutes' walk from here, there's a police station."

Fan Jia gave him a grateful look. Chen Zhaoci said nothing and began leading the way.

The sky remained as dark and impenetrable as thick ink. The two walked single file, maintaining about a meter's distance between them. Worried his mental state might become unstable again, Fan Jia occasionally made small talk—asking if he was cold, what time it might be, or about the general layout of the slum area. Being naturally cheerful, and now that Chen Zhaoci was under her control, she felt relaxed and even smiled at him occasionally. Though Chen Zhaoci couldn't bring himself to smile, his inner turmoil seemed to ease somewhat, and the heaviness in his expression lessened.

Fan Jia found it rather remarkable that she had managed to reach a kind of reconciliation with a psychologically disturbed criminal. The feeling wasn't bad—it was like taking a stone full of holes and cracks and somehow managing to patch it up until it gained a slightly smoother, gentler outline. She thought to herself that when she got back later, she would definitely share this entire experience with Sister You and that big oaf Mengshan. Even though the real murderer who killed Zhao Feier hadn't been caught yet, Liu Yisha's death had been thoroughly investigated and clarified. At least they had made some progress.

Though the midnight was cold, silent, and pitch black, and she was walking alongside only one guilty person, her heart felt warm, filled with the hope that comes after the shadows have lifted.

They turned into an even narrower alley. The ground was filthy, covered in mud and puddles, with the stench of fish, rotten meat, and decaying vegetable leaves everywhere. Sparse empty stalls lined both sides of the street, and not far away was the entrance to a farmers' market. The end of the road was shrouded in darkness.

Chen Zhaoci stopped walking.

Fan Jia's heart skipped a beat. "What's wrong?"

He replied, "I need to think about which way to go."

Fan Jia looked at him, her tone gentle. "No rush, take your time. We should be almost there, right?"

He answered, "Yeah, almost there." He glanced at her and finally showed a pale but soft smile before leading her onward.

Seeing him guide her onto a wider road with streetlights, Fan Jia felt her mind settle.

After they had walked for a while, he said, "It seems like dawn is approaching."

Fan Jia glanced at the sky and smiled. "Yes."

Chen Zhaoci asked, "Do you want the dawn to come? When day breaks, I'll be going to prison."Fan Jia then understood that perhaps it was fear, struggle, and hesitation that made Chen Zhaoci feel flustered. Instead of answering, she asked in return: "What about you? Do you hope for daybreak?" Despite being trapped for several days and in extremely poor physical condition, if he were to change his mind and try to escape now, Fan Jia was determined to capture him at all costs.

Chen Zhaoci replied: "I don't know."

Fan Jia said softly: "Daybreak will always come. The sooner we get through the night, the sooner dawn will arrive." After speaking, she reached out and took his hand. Chen Zhaoci felt her hand—much colder than his, yet also much softer. He let her hold it, whether out of pity or encouragement. When a thought flashed through his mind—wondering if she was just being manipulative—he saw her clear, resolute eyes. They were truly the eyes of a criminal police officer.

"Let's hurry," he said, pulling his hand from hers. "We don't have much time left."

Fan Jia thought she had successfully stabilized him. Following his quickened pace, they walked along the long, deserted street.

Then she heard rapidly approaching footsteps behind her, accompanied by a rush of wind. Even though her reaction speed had declined significantly due to physical exhaustion, her instincts as a police officer made her reach out and push Chen Zhaoci aside.

Fan Jia only felt a heavy, painful blow to her head and fell to the ground simultaneously with Chen Zhaoci. She tried to get up but couldn't. In her dazed state, she could only see an enormous black shadow cast on the ground right behind her.

Strangely, at that moment, she saw Chen Zhaoci's eyes as he lay collapsed not far away. He was looking at her, tears welling in his eyes. Then a blood-stained Iron Hammer swung over from behind and struck his head.

Volume Four: Dreaming of Home