Bu Shulin had no mind to bicker with Xue Jinqiao, who was quickly dismissed. Pulling Shen Xihe aside, Bu Shulin exclaimed, "Cui Jinbai... he's gone mad!"
Shen Xihe cast a puzzled look. "Mad?"
"Yes, mad." Bu Shulin still felt lingering trepidation. "He actually came to my residence to confess his admiration, even quoting... quoting those careless teasing remarks I'd made before, insisting I must harbor feelings for him too. He carried himself like the mistress of the household, even claiming I'd told the servants he was the lady of Bu Manor!"
Shen Xihe looked equally horrified, her skeptical gaze suggesting she suspected Bu Shulin of speaking nonsense.
That elegant, upright, and noble Cui Shaoqing uttering such words—it shattered Shen Xihe's perception and challenged her capacity to accept reality.
"Isn't he... isn't he mad?" Bu Shulin didn't find Shen Xihe's reaction strange at all, for she had reacted the same way.
Convinced Bu Shulin wasn't fabricating tales, Shen Xihe could only nod. "He does seem rather abnormal."
"What should I do, Youyou?" Bu Shulin tugged at Shen Xihe's sleeve, whispering urgently.
Shen Xihe wore a helpless expression. "I don't know either."
In other matters, she might have plenty of ideas, but in affairs like this, she was utterly clueless.
"Cui Jinbai serves the Crown Prince," Shen Xihe offered, seeing no harm in revealing this to Bu Shulin.
Bu Shulin was stunned. "Then he... he..."
What difference did it make whether he knew she was a woman? The Crown Prince knew her true gender. Since Cui Jinbai served the Crown Prince, what did hiding or not hiding matter?
"Youyou, are you suggesting I confess my true gender to him?" Bu Shulin asked uncertainly.
Shen Xihe shook her head slightly. "This is your own affair. The Crown Prince hasn't told him and won't tell him. Whether you wish to reveal it is your decision. How to handle him is up to you. Don't seek my advice—I have none."
"How did you handle the Crown Prince?" Bu Shulin, equally lost, sought guidance.
"I don't 'handle' him. I've made my stance clear to him." Shen Xihe curved her lips into a faint smile.
Bu Shulin pouted, tilting her head in dejection. "I've brought this upon myself."
"Indeed, you've made your bed, now lie in it," Shen Xihe added, twisting the knife.
Indignant, Bu Shulin retorted, "You have to help me! It was you who told me to pester him back then!"
"I only told you to approach him to avoid trouble. If you couldn't control the measure and ended up provoking him, that's none of my concern." Shen Xihe shot her a cool glance. "If you insist on blaming me, I could simply tell him you're a woman. Perhaps he'll feel deceived, heartbroken, and sever ties, freeing you?"
Bu Shulin stared at Shen Xihe with utter despair. Was this help? This was outright sabotage! Cui Jinbai had already convinced himself to accept her even as a man. If he learned she was a woman, she'd never escape him in this lifetime!
Shen Xihe turned, her gaze piercing through Bu Shulin's eyes. "A Lin, search your heart—do you truly not harbor even a shred of affection for him?"
Bu Shulin parted her lips, then fell silent."If you have feelings for him, why not speak with him about it?" Shen Xihe said. "I understand what's on your mind. We don't know how long this path of ours will be, and neither of you are teenagers anymore. You fear the road ahead is long and worry about delaying his entire life."
"That's only part of it," Bu Shulin whispered. "I don't know when my identity might be exposed, nor when His Majesty will finally lose patience and move against the Bu family. I don't want to implicate him."
The assailants from the Lantern Festival still hadn't been identified. With dangers lurking around Bu Shulin at every turn, she didn't want to drag Cui Jinbai into this muddy water.
"Whether he's willing or not, you should tell him and let him make his own choice," Shen Xihe disagreed with Bu Shulin's unilateral decision to consider what was best for Cui Jinbai. "Whether he regrets it later or not, that's his burden to bear."
After a moment of silence, Bu Shulin finally said, "Youyou, I'm not as rational as you, nor as disciplined. You knew marrying the Crown Prince was a risky move, yet you never retreated. I know you're confident you won't be trapped by emotions or lose control because of them. But I'm different. Though I genuinely care for him, I'm afraid I might later cast everything aside for his sake and forget my own identity."
Hearing this, Shen Xihe found herself momentarily at a loss for words. Bu Shulin walked on thin ice with every step. Whether someone has feelings for another can be revealed through the slightest glance or expression. A perceptive person need only see two people together to sense it.
Over the years, Bu Shulin had thoroughly ingrained the identity of being male into her very bones. If she were to confess to Cui Jinbai and they truly became lovers, she would likely quickly expose her true gender as a woman. The most dangerous tells were those unconscious mannerisms and instinctive reactions—ones she might not even notice herself until others had already seen through everything.
Shen Xihe understood this dilemma: it was about whether to indulge one's heart. As long as Bu Shulin refused to indulge her feelings and acknowledge her affection, even if she cared for Cui Jinbai, she wouldn't reveal any feminine mannerisms.
But if she confessed and they became mutually devoted, once she started acting like a woman in love, every gesture and action would become extremely dangerous.
It was similar to that day at the Tao residence, when Bu Shulin had been influenced by her and nearly performed a formal bow to the Tao elders.
"So Cui Shaoqing must suffer, though you haven't been too harsh on him," Shen Xihe remarked with a somewhat teasing tone.
Bu Shulin shot her a glare. "How would I dare hurt him? You didn't see how sarcastic he was today—it was like seeing a ghost. I've been avoiding him as much as possible. For the next couple of days, don't send A Xi to examine me. I'll come here myself daily."
She stayed at the Princess Manor until dark. In the past, she had to be somewhat discreet, visiting only every few days. But now that Shen Xihe was betrothed, as long as the Crown Prince didn't object, she could openly linger from morning till night.
She could even freeload meals here, she thought delightedly.
Unfortunately, her plans were too idealistic. Cui Jinbai was never one to sit back and wait. When he was willing to let her bully him, she naturally had the upper hand. But when he wasn't, ten Bu Shulins combined were no match for Cui Jinbai.
For two consecutive days, whenever Cui Jinbai went to the Bu residence, he was told Bu Shulin had gone to the Princess Manor and only returned after staying for the evening meal. Realizing she was avoiding him, on the third day, while Bu Shulin was having the morning meal with Shen Xihe, an officer from the Dali Temple arrived with an official document."Your Highness, someone has filed a lawsuit against Worldly Son Bu at the yamen. I have been ordered to invite Worldly Son Bu to the Dali Temple to cooperate with the investigation."
Bu Shulin's hand, holding a sesame cake, froze mid-air.
Shen Xihe suppressed a laugh: "Go quickly. Resisting arrest is a serious crime."