Be Passionately In Love

The basketball court wasn't crowded, but a circle of onlookers had gathered around, their gazes occasionally drifting toward the two of them. A few boys nearby were egging them on, whistling. When Chen Luzhou went over to ask for the ball, one of them couldn't resist teasing, "Damn, Luzhou's got game."

Chen Luzhou ignored them, taking the ball from his hand. "I'm just playing with Xu Zhi for a bit. Are you guys practicing now?"

"Go ahead, go ahead," the other boy immediately conceded, adding with exaggerated understanding, "No worries, we can lose the match—girlfriend comes first. Play with her, go on!"

...

As soon as the two stepped onto the court, Xu Zhi noticed a few girls leaving from the sidelines. She glanced at Chen Luzhou, who was warming up. "Hey, your class's cheerleader captain just left."

Chen Luzhou gave an indifferent "Oh," keeping his eyes fixed on the hoop as he stood along the three-point line. He casually tossed the ball—a smooth arc—and swish , it went in. The boys on the sidelines erupted in cheers, whistles, and exaggerated applause, instantly livening up the court.

Xu Zhi, however, was still watching the girls who had started carrying away supplies. "Your cheerleader captain just defected—and she's taking the supplies with her."

Chen Luzhou had just retrieved the ball and dribbled it twice before turning to look outside the court. He couldn't help but laugh. "You're ridiculous. Those are seniors from our department. There's a sophomore match next door—your Minister Jiang is playing too. Those supplies are theirs."

Xu Zhi let out an "Oh." The two stood facing each other at the free-throw line. After speaking, Chen Luzhou held the ball out to her. Just as she reached for it, he pulled it back slightly, looking down at her with cool detachment. "Want to win or lose?"

Xu Zhi teased, "Of course I want to win. I already booked a hotel."

Chen Luzhou stared down at her, unmoving, his tone meaningful. "Then I'll give you a four-point handicap. You get ten, I get six."

Xu Zhi: "I suggest you just forfeit."

"Can't do that," Chen Luzhou said with principled resolve, dribbling the ball once before casually tossing it toward the hoop again. The smooth arc sailed over her head— clang —landing squarely in the basket. Another score. Xu Zhi felt the pressure mounting as he looked at her with a faint smirk, his voice low. "You’ve got to put in at least some effort. Otherwise, how can sleeping with me be this easy?"

He was always straightforward, his heart as clear as daylight. But now, there was something else in his deep gaze—something that made her pulse race. The way he looked at her was like the most dangerous predator hidden in the jungle, direct and impulsive.

Her heartbeat inexplicably quickened. She wasn’t sure if Chen Luzhou was serious. Until now, she’d assumed he was joking, but the longer this went on, the more she suspected he might mean it. "Are you serious?"

Chen Luzhou stood still, watching as she slightly averted her eyes, her gaze drifting elsewhere. His tone was cool. "Yeah."

What else could he do? Earlier, on the court, he hadn’t even wanted to talk to her. But seeing her standing there alone, he couldn’t help himself.Before coming to Beijing, the two of them had met once. Tan Xu was very direct, asking Chen Luzhou if he was dating Xu Zhi. Chen Luzhou didn’t answer and instead countered, "What’s it to you?" Tan Xu said it wasn’t really his business, but added, "You’ve only known each other for a month. She’s not as good as you think she is, Chen Luzhou. You don’t really understand her at all. She’s a very selfish person and even gets jealous when others do better than her in studies."

"She’s also quite stubborn. There was a print shop near our school that once scammed her out of five yuan, and for a long time, she changed her WeChat name to ‘XX Print Shop is a Scam.’ And her sense of morality is weak. If she saw an old lady fall on the street, she definitely wouldn’t help because she’s afraid of being extorted. She always prioritizes self-preservation. The only way she knows how to solve problems is through violence. If you’ve ever been to our school, you’d know that the bulletin board still has her acceptance letter to A University posted right next to her disciplinary record. Also, besides Cai Yingying, she used to have another close friend who later ended up in rehab. The people around her aren’t exactly good influences."

"Oh, after her mom died, her dad struggled with depression for a long time and even attempted suicide once. She says her dad is a very gentle person. Back then, she was constantly on edge, making sure to hide all the knives before leaving the house. Sometimes during class, she’d space out, worrying whether she’d remembered to put them away, and would even skip class to go back and check. And, actually, she’s always smoked—she did it a lot during senior year. You didn’t know that, did you?"

"Chen Luzhou, I spent some time at No. 1 High School, and everyone says you have a good temper, come from a good family, and excel academically. You’re not flawless, but someone as clean and outstanding as you is rare. Her life is a kind of chaos you’ve never seen. Your presence is like a higher-dimensional being descending upon her world. Or, to put it another way, she’s someone who could easily go down the wrong path. The fact that she got into A University was because I pulled her along every step of the way. For two years in high school, I was with her day and night. I corrected her mistake notebooks, and I personally taught her study habits."

After hearing all this, Chen Luzhou was surprised, but not entirely. The Xu Zhi described by Tan Xu felt like a stranger to him, yet he couldn’t deny that it also sounded like her. But he got the sense that Tan Xu had been her spiritual guide, while all he’d done was kiss her—there was no real substance between them. He suddenly felt like a cheap knockoff.

Just then, someone outside the court softly called Xu Zhi’s name. Both of them turned to see Xu Gongzhu standing at the edge of the court with Tan Xu, who was wearing a white shirt and glasses, his face as pale as ever. But behind those lenses, his eyes were fixed firmly on Xu Zhi. Chen Luzhou calmly averted his gaze and began dribbling the ball absentmindedly on the ground. As Xu Zhi was about to walk over, Chen Luzhou suddenly raised the ball above his head and tossed it away, casually remarking—

"If you go to him now, don’t come looking for me again. I don’t have the patience to keep wasting time like this. We’re done here."

Only then did Xu Zhi realize what had been bothering Chen Luzhou all day. "Did you see something yesterday?"He kept a cold face and didn’t speak, tossing the ball to the ground in disappointment as he lost interest and walked off the court. Bending down, he picked up a bottle of water, unscrewed the cap, and took a sip. The people nearby didn’t know what had happened between them and assumed it was just a halftime break. Someone immediately came over to ask Chen Luzhou if he wanted milk tea, with the class monitor saying they’d order a cup for everyone who had played.

Chen Luzhou tilted his head back as he drank, initially intending to refuse. But after a moment’s thought, he turned back and asked for one—just in case Xu Zhi wanted it. You cheap bastard , he thought to himself, still thinking about whether she’d want milk tea even while you’re fighting.

Threatening words like these had little effect on Xu Zhi. She looked at him calmly and bluntly, saying, “Is that really what you think? Chen Luzhou, I thought you were the same as me.”

There were still quite a few people around the court. The two of them stood near the basketball hoop, and perhaps because the tension between them was palpable, no one lingered too close. A group of boys sat on the mats behind them, occasionally casting curious glances their way, but none dared to approach. Passersby deliberately skirted around them.

Chen Luzhou’s expression remained indifferent as he leaned against the basketball frame, letting out a cold laugh. “Give me a break. I’m not worthy, I admit defeat. When other people chase after me, you’re practically cheering them on from the sidelines. If you really cared about me, would you act like this? Last night, Tan Xu came looking for you, and I get that you went out for late-night snacks with him, but couldn’t you have at least told me? What do you take me for, huh? Just some casual fling?”

“I thought you wouldn’t care about him. And I’ve explained to you so many times before—I don’t like him, and I never will. Chen Luzhou, are you stupid?”

“But he likes you. Xu Zhi, you’re the only one who thinks I’m stupid. To me, I’ve always treated you as my girlfriend. Otherwise, did you really think you could just kiss me whenever you felt like it? If it were Gu Yan coming to see me, do you know what I’d do? I wouldn’t hide it from you. Since you think it doesn’t matter, maybe we should just call it quits.”

With that, Chen Luzhou pushed off from the basketball frame. As he passed under the hoop, he intercepted a ball someone had just shot, dribbled it coldly a couple of times, and then walked away without ever looking back at her.

After Xu Zhi had Xu Gongzhu send Tan Xu away, she returned to her dorm and sat there all afternoon. The calming horizontal lines of her structural diagrams did little to soothe her. She drank half a dispenser’s worth of water but still couldn’t calm down. It had been a long time since she’d felt this way.

After her mother passed away, the household had been thrown into chaos. Before Lin Qiudie’s death, there had been some issues with one of her construction projects, leaving a large group of workers unpaid. As the project manager, Lin Qiudie had been on good terms with them privately. But once she was gone, they came knocking, wailing and threatening, demanding their wages. Old Xu, socially awkward, couldn’t handle it, and the old lady only knew how to chase them off with a rolling pin.

Xu Zhi had seen firsthand how relentless those people could be. When someone was alive and well, they’d be all smiles and politeness, but the moment they were gone, the nastiest words would come out. Some even camped outside their doorstep with infants in their arms, refusing to leave no matter how they were driven away, determined to get their money.

That was when she’d learned that anger was the most useless emotion in the world. No matter how furious you got, the money still had to be paid, and the homework assignments wouldn’t magically disappear.Xu Zhi found a movie to watch. The basketball court was close to the dorm, and occasionally, she could hear bursts of cheers from that direction. When Zhu Yangqi called her, the movie’s progress bar was nearing the end. She tilted her head to glance out the window and realized it was almost dark. Taking off her headphones, she picked up her phone from the desk.

Zhu Yangqi sounded frantic on the other end, his voice tinged with urgency. “Damn, finally got through! Where the hell is Chen Luzhou? I’ve been waiting for him at the hotel all day.”

Xu Zhi paused the movie. “He’s playing basketball, but it should be over by now. He didn’t bring his phone.”

“Then he probably hasn’t gone back yet. I tried calling him, but his phone’s dead. Are you busy? If not, let’s grab a bite first. I’ve got something urgent and might have to leave soon.”

Zhu Yangqi had slept all day at the hotel and was now starving. As soon as they sat down, he hastily ordered a few dishes and urged the owner to serve them quickly.

“Aren’t you waiting for Chen Luzhou?” Xu Zhi asked while flipping through the drink menu.

Zhu Yangqi gulped down a glass of water. “Who knows when he’ll finish? Guys take forever with basketball. He’ll probably go eat with his roommates afterward, then shower, wash his hair, and blow-dry it. That’ll take at least another hour. Don’t you two usually eat together at school?”

“Not often, really. He’s been catching up on classes lately.”

“Well, it’s the weekend today. He’ll probably reach out to you later.”

Xu Zhi sighed. “No, he won’t.”

Only then did Zhu Yangqi realize. “He’s still sulking? Seriously? He talked to me until 3 or 4 a.m. last night, then got up at 5, saying he was going back to have breakfast with you. I thought he’d gotten over it.”

Xu Zhi looked up at him. “This morning?”

Zhu Yangqi nodded. He sighed, pouring himself another glass of water, carefully weighing his words. He didn’t want to say too much—Chen Luzhou might beat him up—but keeping quiet felt unfair. Still, he wasn’t one to overthink things, except when it came to Chen Luzhou. Then, he always considered things a little more carefully.

“Xu Zhi, I’ll just say this once, and don’t mention it to him later. I’ve never shared these thoughts with him either.”

“Okay.”

“The truth is, he’s never had much sense of security. For various reasons, and because he’s so outstanding, people who approach him aren’t always genuine—handsome, rich, you know. So he holds himself to impossibly high standards, forcing himself to excel in everything to mask the superficial stuff. Because he lacks security himself, he goes out of his way to make sure the people around him feel secure—whether it’s family, love, or friendship. As a son, he’s flawless. We joke about him being a bit of a mama’s boy, but he’s nothing like us. He never had the luxury of acting spoiled. When he ranked first in his class in elementary school, his mom said class first wasn’t special. So for his middle school entrance exams, he topped the entire city.”"He transfers schools when his family tells him to, and he goes abroad when they say so. He is always adapting to new environments. I only transferred once and realized how difficult it is to adjust to a new place, but he has never complained to us. He is someone who can digest negative energy on his own. When friends have nothing to talk about, I never worry that him making new friends will make me anxious. You two have been ambiguous for so long; has he ever made you nervous?"

"Although he seems to have disappeared these past few months, I know he is moving towards you with every step."

"I don't really know what happened specifically. His parents got divorced, and he lost his only home. He once told me that was his only home. You probably don't understand how hard it is for him to take this step coming from that kind of family."

Zhu Yangqi seemed to feel that it wasn't enough fun after dinner, so he wanted to go sing karaoke. There was a KTV right downstairs from the hotel he was staying at. He booked a small private room, and while choosing fruits at the supermarket, Zhu Yangqi received a text from Chen Luzhou. He glanced at it, tossed his phone back into the basket, and said to Xu Zhi, "Chen Luzhou will come over later; he just finished a basketball game and is taking a shower now."

"He just finished?" Xu Zhi asked casually while picking out some wine.

"He said he twisted his ankle and just went to the medical room."

When Chen Luzhou pushed open the door to the private room, Xu Zhi instinctively glanced at his foot, but he wasn't limping at all. She looked at Zhu Yangqi with some doubt, who was passionately belting out a song by Ashin, "Even If I Die, I Want to Love." But the look in his eyes was sharp, and he whispered in her ear, "Are you nervous about my brother? I never said he twisted his ankle; it was his roommate."

"Boring." Xu Zhi shot him a glance.

Chen Luzhou walked in, didn't speak to Xu Zhi, and directly sat down next to Zhu Yangqi. Zhu Yangqi was sandwiched in the middle, lost in the song, howling into the microphone. After finishing a song, he handed the microphone to Chen Luzhou, "Come on, sing a song."

Chen Luzhou leaned back on the sofa with his arms crossed. He really looked tired after just playing basketball, and his eyes scanned the microphone with some impatience. "Forget it; I just played basketball, and my voice is hoarse." His voice was indeed a bit raspy, and he coughed and cleared his throat.

"Did you win?"

"Yeah."

"Is your voice really that bad?"

He lazily sighed, "I still didn't play enough; there's no chemistry. They don't understand my hand signals, so I can only call their names. The cheerleaders were so loud that I couldn't shout over them. But there was a pretty good player on the opposing team; I got blocked by him twice, and I was a bit lost in the second half, couldn't keep up on defense."

"As long as you won, don't set your expectations so high."

"That won't do; I have OCD. I need to block him back next time."

"Come on, your OCD is just about forcing others."

Chen Luzhou smirked slightly, and they stopped chatting. The room fell silent, and Zhu Yangqi had to pick up the microphone and sing alone while the two statues beside him sat still, watching the TV screen.

**

The room was dimly lit, with some complimentary fruits and sunflower seeds on the table. The shadows in the entire room flickered, and the light from the MV danced unsettlingly on the faces of the three of them.Zhu Yangqi's singing was truly ear-piercing. He probably had a rocker's soul inside him, with a raspy voice that carried a metallic quality, as if there was a decades-old lump of phlegm stuck in his chest—completely different from Chen Luzhou's style. Chen Luzhou's voice was clean, and the occasional hoarseness inexplicably came off as sexy.

The two of them weren’t speaking, and Zhu Yangqi, sandwiched between them, was so restless from the tension that he felt like he’d been taken hostage by two undercover cops. He didn’t dare move, afraid they might pull out guns at any moment. Other people’s relationships tortured themselves, but when the cool kids dated, they just tortured everyone else.

Left with no choice, Zhu Yangqi took on the role of messenger—though this particular messenger job was mentally exhausting.

Xu Zhi said, "Ask him if he’s eaten. If not, we can order something here."

Zhu Yangqi immediately relayed the message, "Xu Zhi wants to know if her sweet little darling hasn’t eaten yet?"

The guy was sprawled on the sofa, legs spread wide, eyes fixed on the TV. Hearing this, he silently glanced over. "‘Sweet little darling’—you added that yourself, didn’t you?"

Zhu Yangqi shook his head innocently. "Absolutely not. I don’t have that kind of experience."

Yeah, right. Chen Luzhou lazily replied, "Not eating."

But then Zhu Yangqi turned to Xu Zhi and said, "He wants you to feed him."

Chen Luzhou kept his eyes on the screen, expression cold and detached, and without hesitation, he kicked Zhu Yangqi. "...I can fucking hear you."

Xu Zhi did end up glancing at him before going out to order food—a plate of fried rice and a bowl of wontons. When she returned, Zhu Yangqi was nowhere to be seen. Only Chen Luzhou remained on the sofa, his tall frame lounging there. He wore just a loose black hoodie, the same brand he always wore, the design nearly identical except for the logo’s placement. A small, unthreatening tiger was embroidered on the sleeve. He looked clean and fresh, holding a microphone.

With just the two of them in the private room, the atmosphere grew even more stifling, thick enough to cut with a knife. Xu Zhi watched as he lowered his head and selected a song on his phone. Casually, she asked, "Where’s Zhu Yangqi?"

Without looking up, one hand on his phone and the other scratching behind his ear with the microphone, he answered flatly, "Bathroom."

As soon as he spoke, the song’s intro began to play softly. Xu Zhi leaned back against the sofa, curious about what he would sing—what else he even knew. The intro sounded cheerful. The vocals came in quickly, and within seconds, his voice flowed from the speakers, deep and clear, suddenly crashing into her ears and inexplicably making her chest tighten.

"The moon blinks its eyes, I hold you in my palm, those words I say—afraid you’ll pretend not to hear..."

Xu Zhi glanced at him, but his face showed no extra emotion. He was just singing.

"Ding ding dong dong, why is it so quiet tonight, just waiting for you, breathing decides..."

For some reason, listening to these lyrics while seeing his unyielding cold expression that refused to be coaxed, Xu Zhi's heart inexplicably raced, as if a restless fawn was darting around in her chest.

"Light drizzling rain gently falls on the rooftop, the rhythm of summer night cicadas feels so familiar, drip drop why do I dream of you again tonight..."

...

By the time Zhu Yangqi returned, Chen Luzhou had already finished singing. Taking a phone call, Zhu pushed the door open and hurriedly said to them, "Chen Luzhou, I have to head back first. My art teacher forgot their keys, I need to rush back."

So the private room was left with just the two of them again. Neither spoke. Chen Luzhou sat there, queuing up song after song without singing—just letting the room's music cycle through. Not a single song was played to completion; he'd lose patience halfway and skip to the next. Leaning back on the sofa with his legs casually spread, he idly spun his phone in hand. After a few rotations, he'd pause to skip the song, then resume spinning his phone with leisurely indifference, looking every bit the unruly rogue.

And every time Xu Zhi reached the emotional climax of a song—whether melancholic, passionate, exhilarated, or sorrowful—just as the smooth, lingering melody was swirling in her mind, he'd abruptly cut it off. The playlist consisted entirely of:

"Heartbreaker"

"Social Butterfly"

"Bad Girl"

"Kissing Too Real"

"One Game One Dream"

"A Little Hurt"

"Beginning to Understand"

"I'll Be Fine"

"How Could You Bear to Leave Me"

"Dog"

Yet Xu Zhi didn't say a word, quietly watching him wield his subtle provocation like needles hidden in cotton.

Finally, she spoke calmly, "Zhu Yangqi's upstairs room wasn't canceled. When I went to settle the bill, the owner said canceling now would still charge the full rate, so I didn't have him cancel it."

Chen Luzhou glanced at her, sensing some underlying implication—as if she was dead set on sleeping with him. "What's it for then? Who's sleeping there?" he asked.

Xu Zhi had applied light makeup today, her lips a shade deeper than usual, accentuating her fair skin. Her eyes were straightforward and clear, dressed in a cream-colored thin sweater that outlined her delicate neck. Crossing her legs, the tips of her boots lightly tapped the floor as she replied nonchalantly, "If you won't sleep there, I will."

When the two entered the elevator, a young couple was already inside. The boy teased the girl, saying she shouldn't make wishes on shooting stars anymore—he'd just read that they were astronauts' waste. The girl gasped in surprise, leaning against the elevator wall laughing uncontrollably. "I didn't go to school much, don't fool me." After the boy whispered something in her ear, she blushed and playfully hit him. "You're so annoying," she cooed, sweet and bashful. Such flushed, intimate scenes were commonplace around the university district—student romances always seemed bolder and more unrestrained.

Chen Luzhou didn't press for the ground floor. Xu Zhi looked at him and asked casually, "Aren't you going back to the dorm?"

Hand in his pocket without even glancing at her, while the couple behind them grew increasingly intimate—unconcerned about onlookers—Chen Luzhou lazily watched the elevator's red flashing numbers above, appearing utterly detached. Rolling his throat stubbornly, he said, "Just seeing you to your door, then I'm heading back to the dorm."Xu Zhi never felt crowded when taking the elevator with others, but he was tall—though lean—with broad shoulders, making the elevator feel cramped. It seemed like he occupied most of the space, and her breathing grew uneven, her heartbeat pounding loudly in her ears.

"Were you serious about what you said on the court?"

"Yeah."

When he turned cold, he was truly icy. No wonder—given how he looked, he must have broken plenty of girls' hearts over the years.

"Okay, got it."

Xu Zhi closed the door and sat on the sofa for about twenty minutes. Then she realized she hadn’t brought any toiletries—makeup remover, face wash—so she sighed, grabbed her phone, and headed downstairs to buy some cleanser. As soon as she opened the door, a dark figure in her peripheral vision caught her attention. She instinctively turned and saw someone leaning against the wall.

Chen Luzhou probably hadn’t expected her to open the door so suddenly. His gaze, when it flicked toward her, still carried traces of unchecked emotion—confused, suppressed, as if he’d been interrupted mid-thought. There was a hint of surprise too, but it quickly cooled. He shifted his weight, pressing his shoulder against the wall as he looked down at her. "I’m thirsty. Got any water?"

When Xu Zhi turned to fetch him a glass, she heard the door slam shut behind her. Assuming the automatic lock hadn’t caught and the door had swung back—hotel doors closed on their own—she thought she’d accidentally shut Chen Luzhou out again. But the moment she turned to check, a shadow loomed over her. Before she knew it, she was pinned against the full-length mirror by the entrance, her back pressed against the cold surface while her front burned against him.

One side was ice, the other fire. Her blood seemed to surge wildly under her skin, her scalp tingling, toes curling, nerves coiling. She struggled instinctively, but he’d gone too far—one hand locked both of hers behind her back as he lowered his head to kiss her neck. Xu Zhi had no choice but to tilt her head back, the warm, electric sensation of his lips and teeth grazing her skin sending her world spinning.

The room was still dark, silent except for their ragged breaths and the maddening sound of his kisses against her neck.

"Chen Luzhou, you want this too, don’t you? Stop pretending," Xu Zhi murmured dazedly, her throat exposed.

"No," he replied, his voice uncharacteristically hoarse, laced with a rare, rough-edged desire. His breath was hot against her skin, his movements urgent yet inexperienced, like a new driver hitting the horn in short, abrupt bursts. "But I stood outside for twenty minutes thinking—if I leave tonight without doing anything, I’ll regret it. So, Xu Zhi, here are your choices: either we sleep together tonight and pretend we’re strangers at school from now on, or you let Chen Luzhou be your boyfriend."

**

About half an hour later.

Zhu Yangqi was still in a taxi, rushing back to the art studio. The streets were jammed, and under the glow of taillights and neon signs, the night felt lonelier than ever. As a student far from home, sitting alone in the cab while the city lit up outside, a wave of helplessness washed over him—the kind that comes with being adrift in an unfamiliar place.

At least he still had two friends from back home.Coincidentally, his phone buzzed in the car. Seeing it was Chen Luzhou calling, Zhu Yangqi thought—true brothers indeed, sharing a psychic connection. This comforting call couldn't have come at a better time.

Zhu Yangqi answered, "Yeah?"

The familiar voice on the other end said, "Hey, help, I can't breathe."

Zhu Yangqi paused. "What's wrong? Is your sweater too tight?"

"Nah, my girlfriend's hugging me too hard," came the shameless reply. "She just confessed to me."

Zhu Yangqi: "YOU SON OF A—!!!!!!!!"

Author's Note: Mostly just sweet little daily snippets from here on out, not much plot left. My recent chapters have been around 6-7k words because I've been pulling all-nighters to write and can't quite adjust my rhythm. Sorry about that—red envelopes for everyone this chapter!

The song lyrics are from "Light Rain Weather."

Actually, this song didn't exist back then, but it suits them so well. You can treat it as background music if you'd like.