Be Passionately In Love

Freshmen do tend to exaggerate a bit when they first enter university. After all, one of their required course professors sincerely advised them in class:

"When I was young, I couldn’t understand Lu Xun. Later, when I picked up his books again in college, I was filled with respect and admiration for him. Then, I fell for a brilliant girl in university. I’ve always been shy and introverted since childhood. She studied literature, while I was in the math department. Back then, I wasn’t particularly interested in literature, but she seemed like that Diary of a Madman I couldn’t comprehend as a child—full of mystery. So, for her, I started studying literary works. She loved Osamu Dazai, so I read all of his books. By the time I finished, she was already strolling hand in hand with my senior across campus. At the time, I was still researching why Osamu Dazai had attempted suicide five times. Coincidentally, I was working part-time at the campus convenience store when my senior came in to buy breakfast. I couldn’t help but ask him, ‘Senior, about this Osamu Dazai—’ He cut me off sternly, ‘I don’t eat sandwiches.’"

"So, my advice to you is: if you meet a girl you like, chase her right away. Because once you graduate, you’ll realize that unsolvable math problems at twenty might upset you for a while, but the girl you couldn’t win over at twenty might haunt you for a lifetime. Of course, this is just my personal opinion and has nothing to do with the university’s stance. Don’t take photos or post videos. If I go viral, it won’t do you any good—I’ll demand a raise, and since the wool comes from the sheep’s back, the school might just hike up your tuition fees."

Though he was joking, someone inevitably recorded it, and clips even made it to short-video platforms. That professor had always been somewhat of an online sensation—everyone knew his quirks, and he’d trended several times. Yet, without fail, he would tirelessly recount his love story to each new batch of freshmen. As a result, the entire internet practically knew about his sandwich-averse senior.

The freshman workload was intense, and to build a solid foundation, Xu Zhi had also enrolled in a fast-track drafting class. Her free time was scarce, and she was genuinely swamped back then, especially with Old Xu frequently calling her at night for hour-long chats.

Once, during a call with Old Xu, a guy staged an elaborate confession outside the girls’ dorm—neatly arranged heart-shaped candles lit up the night as he passionately recited a trending love poem from the internet:

"On my barren land, you are my last rose—"

Old Xu was baffled on the other end of the line. "That lad’s got quite the lung capacity."

Xu Zhi replied, "The university recitation club is practicing."

Old Xu chuckled. "Don’t play dumb—it’s a suitor, isn’t it? So, what’s he like? Handsome? What’s his major?"

Holding the phone, Xu Zhi leaned on the balcony railing and glanced down absentmindedly. "Can’t see his face. Do you think he could be better-looking than Chen Luzhou?"

Old Xu clicked his tongue disapprovingly. "Why do you always compare people to that kid?"

I’m not comparing , she thought. So even literature majors recite others’ poems when confessing. Romantic little poets truly aren’t found everywhere. Those who can write poetry—and also remember every one of my questions, pondering them carefully before giving earnest replies—well, there’s probably only one such person in this world. At this thought, Xu Zhi was about to hang up and go downstairs to clarify things with the person, but then she saw Senior Du pat the guy on the shoulder and pull him aside to say something. Soon after, the guy packed up his things and left.

As soon as Senior Du entered the room, Xu Gongzhu, who was applying a face mask, couldn’t help but count on her fingers for her. "Let me calculate—since the semester started, there have been about five or six guys seriously pursuing you, Xu the Beauty. Haven’t you liked any of them?"

Xu Zhi was searching for her charger to plug in her phone but couldn’t find it after a long while. Eventually, she discovered it was stuck behind the desk. As she bent over, her curves were accentuated—full in the front and round in the back—while she fumbled behind the desk. She replied nonchalantly, "Really, none. I’m not planning to date anyone."

Xu Gongzhu smoothed out her face mask and glanced at the flawless figure reflected in the mirror. "What about Jiang Yu? Remember that time in the cafeteria when he sat across from you? I think Senior Du might have some personal bias against him. Jiang Yu is definitely the heartthrob of his department. He even went viral in short videos for a while—looks just like that newly debuted celebrity."

This was what Du Qilan had said, arms crossed as she leaned against the ladder between the bunk and the desk, looking seriously at Xu Gongzhu. "Do you know why you think Jiang Yu is so handsome?"

Xu Gongzhu was taken aback. "Huh?"

"Because the guys in your grade are generally lacking. In our grade, besides Jiang Yu, there are plenty of other good-looking guys, so we’re kind of immune to it. That’s why we seniors are really worried for you juniors. Handsome as they are, quite a few of them are jerks. But Jiang Yu’s alright. Xu Zhi, I really think you should give him a chance."

"Really? I find him pretty average," Xu Zhi said as she pulled out the charger and plugged in her phone.

Du Qilan couldn’t help but eye her curiously, slowly sizing her up. "If Jiang Yu’s average to you, Xu the Beauty, it seems you’ve dated before."

Xu Gongzhu’s interest was instantly piqued. She tore off her mask, tossed it into the trash, and leaned over the back of her chair, her face glistening with essence, eager for gossip. "Really? What kind of guy was he? Oh my god, I’m so curious."

Xu Zhi had just changed into her pajamas, wearing a fluffy bunny-eared headband that revealed her clean forehead and delicate features. The "C" earring on one ear sparkled. Chen Luzhou was someone hard to summarize in just one word. If she had to, she’d say his appearance had miraculously aligned her and Cai Yingying’s tastes. She stated the most obvious fact: "Very handsome."

Xu Gongzhu sighed in disappointment. "Handsomeness is pretty subjective, though. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What you find handsome might not be the same for us. Take Jiang Yu—I think he’s hot, but Senior Du thinks he’s just okay."

Xu Zhi leaned against her desk, her phone charging beside her. She pulled out a book to review some vocabulary. "Alright, then there’s nothing more to gossip about. Maybe it’s just my personal taste."During that period, Xu Zhi's WeChat would occasionally pop up with friend requests. She sometimes checked them, and once, she saw one with a profile picture style very similar to Chen Luzhou's—it was a Neuschwanstein Castle. She remembered Chen Luzhou's WeChat Moments background was a picture of that castle. In a moment of impulse, she added the person, thinking at the time that Chen Luzhou might have deleted her and was re-adding her. But then she realized that didn’t make sense—she hadn’t deleted him, so even if he re-added her, there wouldn’t be a request notification unless both sides had deleted each other.

After adding the WeChat account, she immediately exited to check Chen Luzhou’s profile. It was still there, quiet as death, with no updates to his Moments for ages. Xu Zhi suspected he might have changed his phone number and WeChat after going abroad.

So, she held onto a sliver of hope for that Neuschwanstein Castle WeChat account. The other person never messaged her, and she never deleted them. Until one day, during the student council recruitment at school, Xu Zhi filled out an application for the publicity department. When they asked to add her on WeChat, she scanned the QR code, and the Neuschwanstein Castle profile popped up. She looked up instinctively and realized it belonged to Jiang Yu, the guy who had been sitting with Du Qilan in the cafeteria that morning.

At that moment, the last bit of hope in Xu Zhi’s heart flickered out. She returned to her dorm and sat there for the rest of the day. When she first arrived at school, it hadn’t been so bad—the longing hadn’t been this unbearable. But now that her studies and daily life had settled into a routine, she often found herself reminiscing about those summer days during her free time.

She remembered the dimly lit senior high school building, the loud chirping of cicadas, and those awkward yet thrilling kisses in the quiet of the night.

Around late August, they had one last phone call. It was past one in the morning, and Xu Zhi had just finished showering when she noticed a missed call from Chen Luzhou. Without even drying her hair, she sat on the edge of her bed and called him back.

The line rang for a long time before he picked up, and then there was silence.

Neither of them spoke.

Xu Zhi was wrapped in a towel, her hair still dripping, the water slowly soaking into her back. She gazed at the bare gardenia plant by the window, the moonlight unusually soft, and couldn’t help but call his name. "Chen Luzhou?"

He responded with a quiet "Mm."

Xu Zhi: "Miss me?"

There was a long pause on the other end, as if he didn’t want to admit it but knew any denial would sound even more obvious. Finally, he gave a short "Mm."

Xu Zhi chuckled. "Chen Luzhou, you’re so bad at this. You should’ve said, ‘Wrong number,’ like last time—‘Xu Zhi, your shoelace is untied.’ That would’ve been way cooler."

He hummed in agreement but quickly added, "Not as cool as you. Bye."

After that, they never contacted each other again.

Around National Day, the school was bustling with activities, and Xu Zhi was busy with classes both on and off campus. Coincidentally, she had just been accepted into the publicity department before the holiday. Du Qilan, the student council vice president, had been encouraging the girls in their dorm to give the student council a try. Xu Zhi had only filled out the form on a whim while accompanying Xu Gongzhu to sign up—and it just so happened to be Jiang Yu’s publicity department.Xu Zhi joined the publicity department, Xu Gongzhu went to the academic affairs department, and Liu Yisi also entered the arts department. During that period, their dorm room 507 was practically empty at night because everyone was attending department meetings. By the time they returned to the dorm, it was already past ten. After exchanging a few complaints, they would collapse into bed and fall asleep. In their dazed state, they could still hear Xu Gongzhu talking in her sleep, "Minister, leave the dirty and tiring work to me! How could I let you do it? Don’t push your luck! Put that down!! Who are you trying to steal work from?!"

At that time, they were swamped with both studies and work. Xu Zhi barely slept five hours a day. Every night after being startled awake, she would think of someone and then couldn’t fall back asleep. Eventually, all she could hear was Xu Gongzhu smacking her lips in deep slumber. Even someone as composed as Xu Zhi reached her breaking point for the first time, utterly exhausted. She flopped onto her bed and said to Du Qilan with utter despair, "Senior, can you just stab me?"

But from those few words, Du Qilan picked up on something intriguing. "Their academic affairs department really needs some restructuring."

Xu Zhi: "..."

After the initial excitement of freshman year faded, fewer people pursued Xu Zhi. They realized she was unapproachable and had high standards—even someone as popular as Jiang Yu, the department heartthrob, didn’t catch her eye. Others stopped trying their luck, and life became much quieter.

It wasn’t entirely as Senior Du Qilan had said, though. Among the new male students, there were a few who stood out, especially during military training when one of them stole the spotlight by singing an English song, winning over many hearts. Coincidentally, one of these handsome guys was also in the arts department and had been getting close to Liu Yisi recently. Neither had confessed yet, still in that ambiguous stage. Listening to their phone calls at night filled the entire dorm with pink, romantic vibes. Xu Gongzhu was quite interested in that guy, but he liked Liu Yisi, so the dorm atmosphere grew a bit tense.

Every night, Du Qilan and Xu Zhi would drag Xu Gongzhu out for walks on the sports field or late-night snacks. At the same time, they had to reassure Liu Yisi so she wouldn’t feel left out. Caught in the middle, Xu Zhi and Du Qilan found themselves in a tricky spot. Fortunately, Senior Du, a seasoned veteran and the student council vice president, handled such minor conflicts with ease. Xu Zhi, straightforward and sharp, knew how to read the room. Their teamwork was surprisingly smooth, and they managed to balance things so well that the dorm atmosphere actually became quite harmonious. Because of this, Du Qilan grew fonder of Xu Zhi by the day.

One evening, on their way back from the library, Du Qilan thought it over carefully and asked Xu Zhi, "Have you ever considered joining the student council executive committee? Your personality would fit right in. You’re emotionally steady—you know how sometimes departments clash, and we in the executive committee are stuck in the middle, torn between sides."

Xu Zhi pondered for a moment before hastily shaking her head and backing away. "Ah, I’d rather focus on making money. Having meetings every night until ten gives me a headache. You know the publicity department—there’s hardly any real work, but we still have to report every night, especially during weekly meetings. It’s just too damn bureaucratic."Du Qilan smiled but didn't press further. She was about to ask if Jiang Yu was still pursuing Xu Zhi when she spotted Jiang Yu approaching from the basketball court, striding toward them with purpose. Jiang Yu wasn't short—conservatively estimated at 1.83 meters—wearing knee pads on both arms and legs. Even in the near-October weather, he sported a short-sleeved shirt and shorts, the epitome of a sunny, handsome guy. Carrying a water bottle, he called out to Xu Zhi and Du Qilan, "What are you two up to?"

The two stopped under the streetlight, waiting for Jiang Yu to approach. Their shadows shifted unpredictably under the glow. Xu Zhi recalled the night of the recording when she had chased after his shadow, playfully stepping on it. Perhaps all handsome guys' shadows were similar, but she always felt Chen Luzhou's shadow was sharper, cleaner, and more elongated than others'. Even his shadow seemed irresistibly attractive.

Du Qilan said to Jiang Yu, "Poaching someone behind your back."

Jiang Yu walked over with a laugh, though it was unclear if he had heard. Bending at the waist, hands on his knees, he met Xu Zhi's eyes with a warm, spring-like smile. "Going home for National Day?"

"Is there something in the department?" Xu Zhi asked.

Jiang Yu nodded. "A few small things. It's fine if you go home, but after the holiday, there are school competitions to arrange—basketball, photography, calligraphy and painting exhibitions. The posters in our display case haven't been updated, and some promotional short videos still need editing. If you're not going home, could you stay and help out over the holiday?"

Xu Zhi sighed. "Fine. Leave me the department key then."

Jiang Yu grinned. "I'll stay with you."

Xu Zhi froze, glancing at Du Qilan. She was about to say "never mind," but Jiang Yu spoke first, sounding somewhat resigned. "Xu Zhi, I heard from Du Qilan that you had a boyfriend—"

Du Qilan, overhearing, immediately interjected, "Hey!" She shot him a sharp look. "Jiang Yu!"

Under the streetlight, their three shadows stretched long. From the court, the rhythmic thud of basketballs grew louder as people approached. Jiang Yu, Xu Zhi, and the decisive student council vice-president drew curious glances. Jiang Yu looked at Du Qilan and paused, biting his lip before straightening up. "Never mind. I didn’t mean anything by it. If you’re staying to help, I’ll leave the key with Du Qilan."

With that, Jiang Yu gave Xu Zhi one last look and walked away.

As Xu Zhi and Du Qilan headed toward the dorm, their shadows under the streetlight merged and separated repeatedly. Du Qilan hesitated before explaining, "Jiang Yu’s never pursued anyone before, so he doesn’t know if it’s you who’s hard to chase or if all girls are like this. He asked me about it once, and I mentioned a couple things offhand. He was really upset for a while, even told me he’d given up. I thought he had—"

Xu Zhi’s silver-framed glasses glinted under the moonlight, softening her features. "Was it you who told him about the Neuschwanstein Castle image?"

Du Qilan sighed. "Sorry. I saw it by chance. Jiang Yu said he couldn’t add you on WeChat no matter what. That day, I jokingly suggested he try changing his profile picture to Neuschwanstein Castle because I’d noticed you staring at that post all afternoon."During that period, Xu Zhi and Du Qilan spoke less to each other. Xu Gongzhu couldn't understand why the dormitory had suddenly become like this. Xu Zhi had been leaving early and returning late, basically keeping to herself. Senior Du had always been solitary, leaving only Xu Gongzhu and Liu Yisi in the dorm. Liu Yisi was always on long phone calls with that handsome guy, while Xu Gongzhu couldn't focus on her studies and eventually started staying at the library until midnight before returning.

Before the National Day holiday, the entire dorm was shrouded in an eerie awkwardness. Finally, Xu Gongzhu couldn't stand it anymore and approached Du Qilan for a talk. "What exactly happened between you and Xu Zhi?"

Du Qilan had just returned from the library with a stack of books in her arms. They stood at the doorway as she thought about how Xu Zhi was truly different from other girls. She seemed indifferent to everyone, but once she felt uncomfortable, she would subtly distance herself without leaving a trace. On the surface, nothing seemed different—Xu Zhi still talked to Du Qilan, but she rarely shared anything personal anymore.

Du Qilan didn't think much of it. After all, everyone had their own choices. She had helped Jiang Yu simply because she thought he was a decent person. If Xu Zhi was distancing herself because of that, it meant Xu Zhi genuinely disliked Jiang Yu. For the first time, Du Qilan felt she might have overstepped. So she said to Xu Gongzhu, "It's nothing, don't worry. It'll pass in a few days."

Xu Gongzhu replied honestly, "I just feel like the atmosphere in our dorm has been weird lately. I really don't like it. I've heard about girls' dorms where four people end up forming seven or eight separate group chats. You guys haven't made one behind my back, have you?"

Du Qilan chuckled, hugging her books, and said helplessly, "I should call you 'big sister' now. Even if I were the kind of two-faced person you're imagining, do you really think Xu Zhi and Liu Yisi are? Sure, Liu doesn't talk much with us lately, and she's busy with her relationship, but she never forgets to bring you a share of the late-night snacks she buys. And when you were broke at the end of the month, Xu Zhi let you use her meal card for so long without a single complaint."

"That's true. But I'll pay her back—I've been keeping track. I'll give it to her once I get next month's allowance," Xu Gongzhu suddenly remembered. "Oh, right, Senior Du, we had a study department meeting today to check attendance records for each class. It seems like the Humanities Experimental Class has been missing one person—they said he'll report after the holiday. I was thinking, if he shows up for Professor Wang's class, isn't he doomed to fail?"

Du Qilan thought for a moment. "Why are you asking about this?"

Xu Gongzhu said with lingering fear, "Because I was late today, and the way Professor Wang looked at me... I might be doomed too. How awkward would it be if I'm the only one who fails this year?"

Du Qilan comforted her: "Professor Wang is hard to predict. He might fail you, but after skipping so many classes, it's difficult not to fail. Professor Wang's course is tough to begin with, and midterms are coming up soon. You should prepare well. Xu Zhi is good at math, why don't you ask her?"

Author's note: Two chapters combined into one.