By now, the sky had brightened, though it remained overcast, and the wind gradually quieted.
Lin Jinlou lay unconscious in deep slumber, while Zhao Yuechan remained silent, occasionally coughing a few times.
Xianglan wrapped her cloak tighter and dozed off in a half-awake state when she suddenly heard shouts and clashes of battle nearby. Jolting awake, she hurriedly scanned her surroundings. At the foot of the mountain, government troops were locked in combat—one group fighting while retreating, drawing closer to the reed marshes, while the other pursued relentlessly. Unable to discern whether the approaching figures were friend or foe, Xianglan shivered uncontrollably, gripping her crossbow bolt tightly as she stood guard by Lin Jinlou’s side.
Zhao Yuechan, her face filled with terror, trembled all over as she desperately retreated, trying to conceal herself within the reeds.
Whoosh! Whoosh!
Arrows flew toward them but veered off course due to the wind, embedding themselves in the reeds instead. Startled, Xianglan dropped to the ground, only to hear a sharp scream behind her, followed by a splash , as if Zhao Yuechan had fallen into the water.
Fortunately, the fighting was so intense that neither side noticed the commotion nearby.
Xianglan could only hear the sound of frantic splashing in the water, punctuated by faint cries for help. She quickly scrambled to her feet and rushed over. The river surface had frozen over, but the banks were not yet solid. Zhao Yuechan had broken through the thin ice and fallen into the river, clutching reeds on the bank with her right hand. Her face was as pale as gold leaf, her lips devoid of color, and she struggled desperately but could not pull herself ashore. As she thrashed, a cloud of blood began to spread in the water.
Seeing Xianglan, Zhao Yuechan’s face showed intense fear and pleading. Her lips trembling, she gasped, “Help—save me—please—”
Without hesitation, Xianglan grabbed Zhao Yuechan’s wrist and strained to pull her ashore. Cold and hungry, Xianglan had little strength left, but she gritted her teeth and mustered all her might to haul Zhao Yuechan onto the bank. Then, supporting her by the arms, she dragged her further back before finally collapsing, exhausted, and gasping for breath as she stared up at the sky.
Zhao Yuechan’s face was deathly pale, tinged with a bluish-gray hue, and she, too, gasped for air. Soaked to the bone, she shivered violently as the cold wind blew, curling into a ball. An arrow had pierced her left arm, and blood flowed unceasingly.
Xianglan struggled to her feet and moved to remove Zhao Yuechan’s wet clothes. With great effort, she stripped off the soaked garments and, having no dry clothes to offer, took off her own cloak and wrapped it around Zhao Yuechan. She then sprinkled medicinal powder on the wound to stop the bleeding.
Both of them were completely drained of energy and lay collapsed on the ground. The sounds of battle in the distance grew faint and indistinct.
After a long while, Zhao Yuechan struggled to sit up and said weakly to Xianglan, “Th-thank you—thank you for saving me—”
Xianglan glanced sideways at Zhao Yuechan before turning her gaze back to the sky. “You don’t need to thank me. I only did it because my conscience wouldn’t let me do otherwise. Besides, though you may be detestable, your grandfather was a man who valued righteousness over profit, cared for the suffering of others, and met with misfortune for speaking the truth. I hold him in high regard, and saving you was mostly out of respect for him.”
Zhao Yuechan gasped for breath, remaining silent for a moment before coughing and trembling out, “You—a lowly servant—dabbling in the pretentious airs of impoverished scholars—”
Xianglan turned to look at her and said, “Do you think being a master in this life makes you noble? Perhaps in the next life, you won’t even compare to me.”
Their eyes met briefly, and Zhao Yuechan suddenly produced a smile uglier than a cry. “The next life? Pah. In this life, we’re going to die together—”Xianglan sighed. She had never dreamed that in such a desperate situation, it would be the two of them sitting silently together. It seemed all her misfortunes had originated from this woman. She had never been content to remain a servant for life when she first entered the Lin Family. Later, she incurred Zhao Yuechan’s hatred, becoming a maid who suffered constant bullying, scheming, and oppression. Then came Lin Jinlou’s tyranny, Zhao Yuechan’s loathing and brutal beatings, the near-disaster of being sold into a brothel, her father’s imprisonment, her own powerlessness, and all the ordeals within the Lin Family. These past few years had felt like an entire lifetime, yet looking back, it all seemed like an illusory bubble.
When Zhao Yuechan tormented her, she had often fantasized about exacting revenge. But now, she no longer cared about those grudges. Having narrowly survived last night’s ordeal, she lacked the energy to hate anyone anymore—she only wanted to live.
Before long, the sounds of fighting gradually faded. Xianglan peered out and saw a group of people chasing the defeated remnants along the path to the small grove from the previous night. Only then did she relax. The sun had risen, the wind had died down, and it felt warmer than before.
Zhao Yuechan, who had been trembling uncontrollably moments earlier, now felt cold and stiff—a worrying sign. Xianglan moved her closer to Lin Jinlou and shared part of the blanket covering him with her. Glancing at Zhao Yuechan’s face, once as radiant as peach blossoms but now ashen, Xianglan sighed and asked, “How did you end up here last night?”
“Pah! What else could it be?” Zhao Yuechan’s eyes snapped open at the question, her pallid face suddenly contorted with venomous resentment, lending her a fleeting vitality amid her lifelessness. “That bastard Dai Qing sweet-talked his way into my grandfather’s favor and married me, treating me like a goddess at first. But the moment my grandfather died, he changed completely—nothing I did was right. Thankfully, the servant boy attending him was my lover—”
Xianglan stared in stunned silence. Zhao Yuechan shot her a scornful glance and sneered, “Don’t you dare look at me like that! If men can have three wives and four concubines, why can’t I? Dai Qing is an old man who carouses and flaunts himself outside all day—why shouldn’t I find pleasure with handsome young men? Hmph! I once hoped to find someone to rely on for life and live peacefully, but Qian Wenze, Lin Jinlou, Dai Qing—not a single man worth counting on!”
Her expression bitter, voice dripping with malice, she continued, “My lover tipped me off that the scumbag planned to kill me to prove his loyalty to the Second Prince. May lightning strike that vile bastard! Even as a ghost, I’ll never let him off! After cursing him furiously, she caught her breath and added, That Dai Family swine—since he showed no mercy, I owed him none. I sent someone to fetch my elder brother, planning to flee with my family last night, taking the Dai Family’s valuables under cover of darkness and returning to Jinling to my parents. With my grandfather gone, the Zhao Family would collapse anyway—we could lie low somewhere, and the gold and silver would let us live comfortably for generations. But word must have leaked out. Last night, Dai Rong sent assassins after us. They slaughtered my brother’s entire family! Damn them! But he didn’t die well either—wounded and lying on the ground, someone ran him through with a blade! Hahahaha! His cousin was killed by your people too! Hahahaha! Revenge! Sweet revenge!”Zhao Yuechan laughed heartily as she spoke, with a touch of vindictive pleasure, occasionally cursing with venomous resentment. Gradually, her strength failed, and after two bouts of violent coughing, her breathing grew faint. Xianglan no longer wished to listen. Silently, she tugged the blanket tighter around Zhao Yuechan. She then turned her gaze to Lin Jinlou, who remained unconscious, his body burning with fever.
Zhao Yuechan whispered weakly, "I feel terrible all over—am I going to die?" The words she had just spoken seemed to drain the last of her energy, aging her decades in an instant. Like a flower that has bloomed to its end, her color remained, but she appeared withered and haggard, on the verge of fading away.
Xianglan shook her head and suddenly asked, "Was it worth it—all this?"
Zhao Yuechan murmured, "What isn’t worth it?"
Xianglan avoided looking at her, hugging her knees and gazing up at the reeds swaying in the wind overhead. "In life, it’s not making mistakes that one should fear—who hasn’t erred? Though mistakes vary in scale, unless they truly shatter the heavens, as long as one can manage the aftermath, there’s room for redemption. One can start over and change. What’s truly frightening is giving up and letting one mistake lead to another. You’re filled with hatred and resentment, so you indulge your emotions, thinking it’s revenge and that it brings you satisfaction. But does it really? Now, in this state, are you truly satisfied?"
"I too wished to live peacefully, but which of them ever let me rest? I—"
"In the end, it’s your own unwillingness to endure. When you make a mistake, you should bear the consequences. You neither want to shoulder the burden nor change, nor endure the bitter results. So you stir up trouble, and one misstep leads to another. Think about it—in this life, how many people have you wronged with your willfulness and ruthless methods?"
Zhao Yuechan closed her eyes and said coldly, "And how many have you wronged?"
Xianglan wrapped her fox-fur coat tighter around herself. She rarely confided in others, but now she felt a strong urge to speak. "Looking back on my life, the two people I’ve wronged the most are Song Ke and Fang Si. Song Ke treated me with immense kindness, and now that he’s in trouble, I cannot help him. Failing to repay his kindness weighs heavily on my heart. As for Fang Si—she was originally Song Ke’s personal maid and had feelings for him. Because Song Ke and I grew close, she and I became like fire and water. At the time, my temper was still sharp-edged, and we had several disputes and conflicts. In a moment of folly driven by resentment, she made a mistake. To protect me and out of anger at her causing trouble, Song Ke decided to dismiss her. She then took her own life with a white silk cord. Her mother spoke ill of me to Madam Song. To prove that this woman had ill intentions from the start, I publicly exposed her for stealing valuable items from the household. Unexpectedly, it backfired, making Madam Song dislike me even more. Reflecting on it now, I was too harsh and rigid in my dealings, disregarding others’ dignity. In truth, some things are better seen through but not spoken aloud. Had I handled things differently, a life might not have been needlessly lost. At the time, I didn’t think I was wrong—confronting hostility with direct retaliation seemed justified. But later, after entering the Lin Family and experiencing my own struggles, I found myself in a position similar to Fang Si’s. Then I understood that preserving others’ dignity is itself a noble virtue. Now, when I think back, I truly regret it."Zhao Yuechan sneered coldly, "Oh, such kindness puts me to shame—I really ought to call you 'Guanyin Bodhisattva'! Let me tell you, being such a do-gooder won't necessarily earn you good karma!" She opened her eyes and chuckled, "You'll likely be barren in the future, won't you?"
Xianglan froze, turning to look at Zhao Yuechan.
Zhao Yuechan said, "Tsk, tsk, you still don't know, do you? That scoundrel Dai Rong colluded with the Lin Family's Second Mistress, Madam Tan. The Sterility Pill was given to Madam Tan by Dai Rong on my orders. As for how the Jiang sisters got involved later, I'm not sure, but the medicine undoubtedly came from me." Her eyes flickered with a hint of cruelty, her smile tinged with smugness. "Well? Guanyin Bodhisattva, are you regretting saving me now? I'm dying anyway, so I don't care what you do to me, but I despise hypocrites like you!"
Xianglan gazed at Zhao Yuechan for a long time, then shook her head. After a pause, she shook it again and said softly, "I don't regret saving you. If it happened again, I'd still save you. I genuinely pity you. You're selfish and loveless, believing that a life full of schemes and hostility is normal. You can't accept someone who would save and help you, repaying malice with kindness, so you insist it must be insincere and that such deeds bring no reward. But in this world, there is both beauty and ugliness. Precisely because ugliness is abundant, beauty becomes purer and more precious. Some people willingly let go of what others value to preserve that beauty, whether through great sacrifice or actions others deem worthless—I've always believed it's worth it."
Zhao Yuechan was taken aback, let out a faint cold laugh, and fell silent.
Xianglan went to check on Lin Jinlou's condition, reapplying medicine to his chest. She calculated that if he hadn't woken by noon, she would shake him awake to feed him. She worried whether the battle had ended and if she should venture out to seek help.
When she looked back at Zhao Yuechan, she found her unconscious. As Xianglan applied powder to her wounds, Zhao Yuechan moaned and woke up. Xianglan sighed. Zhao Yuechan had been a delicate noblewoman raised in luxury, never enduring such hardship. After suffering humiliation, injury, falling into an icy river, and lacking food and clothing, she now lay still, her body frozen stiff—likely nearing her end.
Xianglan said, "Hold on a little longer. Wait a while longer. If no troops come, I'll go out to find someone to rescue us."
Zhao Yuechan shook her head, her gaze vacant. She turned to look at Lin Jinlou and suddenly laughed mockingly, "He—he probably won't make it either, right? I once gave him my whole heart, and then—who would have thought? In the end, we'll die together. Having him accompany me to the underworld isn't such a bad deal!"
Xianglan remained silent.
Zhao Yuechan suddenly said, "You—take the hairpin from my head." Xianglan removed it—a gold filigree pin adorned with large, lustrous pearls. Zhao Yuechan said, "This pin is worth at least three hundred taels of silver. If you survive, use it to arrange my funeral—a simple coffin, a burial plot, and some paper money burned. At least I'll have a place to rest—I don't want to become a wandering ghost. Keep the remaining silver for yourself."
Xianglan smiled bitterly and said, "Alright. If I live, I will surely bury you properly."Zhao Yuechan nodded, about to close her eyes, when she suddenly opened them again. Her gaze was unfocused, a tear welling at the corner of her eye as she wept, "I don’t want to die! I don’t want to die!" A sudden vitality flushed her face, making her appear more spirited than before. Xianglan understood this was her final rally.
Zhao Yuechan squinted at Xianglan, murmuring, "I don’t want to die—"
Xianglan touched her forehead and looked at her with pity.
Tears streamed down Zhao Yuechan’s cheeks as she said, "I didn’t want to believe it before, but now I do—you really are a foolishly good person—" She chuckled softly a few times. "You’ve saved me four times, and now that I’m dying, I’ll give you a great gift. If you manage to survive, with this, even the entire Lin Family might bow to you." As she spoke, she stretched out her hand, clutching her already damp Waistcoat, and smiled eerily. "The gift is right here."
Xianglan took the Waistcoat, looking at Zhao Yuechan with confusion.
Suddenly, Zhao Yuechan grabbed Xianglan’s hand, crying out with all her strength, "I don’t want to die! I don’t want to die! All that happened before—I brought it upon myself!" After a few loud sobs, she abruptly fell silent, her eyes wide, mouth agape. A final breath failed to come, her head tilted to the side, and she passed away, tears still glistening on her face.
(Posting this for now, the rest isn’t finished yet. Working on it quickly. For Xiao He’s updates, search "He Yanshan" on Weibo for previews.)
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