Wang Daxia's chest suddenly deflated as one of the two large bundles vanished—truly a case of "horizontal ridges becoming peaks when viewed from the side, distant vistas shifting in height."
He simply reached into his garment and pulled out another packet of warm chestnuts, instantly restoring his chest to flat plains. Meeting Wei Caiwei and Lu Ying's astonished gazes, he said, "Don't think I'm some pervert—let me explain..."
Neither Wei Caiwei nor Lu Ying were the type of women from traditional tales who would cover their ears, shake their heads, and shriek "I won't listen!" when a man tried to explain. Instead, they sat down, sipped tea, and nibbled on the warm chestnuts (yes, the very packet Wang Daxia had just produced—best eaten while hot) as they listened to his account of how he went along with the mistake to deceive the foul Taoist.
When the story reached the part where the Taoist boasted "I'll be quick, won't delay your return home to cook," seasoned veteran Wei Caiwei, who was chewing chestnuts, nearly choked and needed half a cup of water to recover. Lu Ying, however, looked utterly bewildered, unaware of what this implied.
Having already stolen Wang Daxia's first kiss and agreed to let him pretend romance with Lu Ying, Wei Caiwei had generously promised she wouldn't mind whatever they did—so long as he remained a virgin. But she never imagined the very people who kidnapped her would take liberties with him: groping his hands, even his waist.
Had it been Lu Ying touching him, she might not have cared. But with severe double standards, Wei Caiwei radiated murderous intent: I'll chop off that foul Taoist's hands! I haven't even touched his waist myself!
After hearing Wang Daxia's explanation, Lu Ying asked, "So it was Prince Jing's men targeting Doctor Wei?"
Wei Caiwei replied, "Most likely that damned eunuch Wei. I embarrassed him at Qionghua Island that day, and he's seizing revenge. He saw you two together, deeply attached, and assumed I'd fallen from favor—that I no longer had protection—so he sent someone to kidnap me."
Recalling Wei Caiwei's life-threatening bloodletting ordeal that day, Wang Daxia burned with rage, wishing to dismember both the Taoist and Eunuch Wei. "Tomorrow at Three Thoroughfares Inn, I'll enter the room with him, capture him on the spot, and force him to confess Eunuch Wei as the mastermind. Prince Jing has already fallen from grace, and Eunuch Wei along with him. Why should we in the Embroidered Uniform Guard fear a mere steward eunuch from a feudal prince's household?"
Lu Ying considered matters more deeply than Wang Daxia. "The foul Taoist said his fellow disciples were all away. Where did they go? Are they plotting another move against Doctor Wei? Capturing just one Taoist is useless—every priest at White Deer Temple is suspect."
Wang Daxia immediately proposed, "Then arrest them all! Toss them into the interrogation room—just need one to talk."
Lu Ying cautioned, "Prince Jing remains a royal prince, and White Deer Temple is his private property. Do you think the Embroidered Uniform Guard can recklessly storm a prince's domain?"
Wang Daxia paced anxiously. "Then what should we do? Are we powerless against that damned eunuch?"
Lu Ying stated, "Doctor Wei's vengeance must be served, and suspicious points must be clarified. Also, are you certain that foul Taoist is the one on the wanted notice? To be prudent, someone who's seen him face-to-face should verify."
Wei Caiwei said, "I'll go. I haggled with him when hailing the cart—I remember his appearance and can recognize his voice."Wang Daxia didn't want Wei Caiwei to take any more risks. "Besides you, Commander Wu from the Shuntian Prefecture Yamen has also seen his face and spoken with him. I'll go ask Commander Wu for help instead. Anyway, during this sandstorm weather, everyone wears eye veils and can't recognize people standing right across from them. Let Commander Wu identify that damned Taoist priest at the Three Thoroughfares Inn."
Wei Caiwei had just recovered, her face barely regaining some color, and couldn't endure further strain. Lu Ying agreed with Wang Daxia, "Then quickly summon Commander Wu. We'll discuss tomorrow's plan for the Three Thoroughfares Inn together—we need to confirm his identity without alerting him."
Seeing there was nothing more for her to do, Wei Caiwei returned to ponder that nearly impossible task: making Vice Minister of Revenue Yan Shifan cough up the two years' worth of withheld salaries owed to Prince Yu's household.
According to Lu Ying's reminder, this matter required Prince Yu to bribe Yan Shifan. But since Prince Yu was currently withdrawn from worldly affairs, could Princess Yu send money to Yan Shifan instead?
Though Princess Yu was quite poor herself, even a worn-out ship still has three pounds of nails. She could pawn some jewelry to raise funds for bribing Yan Shifan—using small money to get big money. Once the two years of withheld salaries were recovered, she could redeem the jewelry, and life could somehow go on...
Lu Ying, Wang Daxia and others worked through the night deploying a honey trap scheme, rehearsing repeatedly with Commander Wu until midnight.
The next day, when Wang Daxia woke up, Lu Ying had already arranged all the necessary disguises. Among them was a woman's breast-binding garment, except this one had two pockets in front with two large, firm Shandong steamed buns sewn inside—each bun weighing at least half a pound.
Bare-chested, Wang Daxia put on the garment directly against his skin, carrying a full pound of steamed buns on his chest like two lumps of armor.
Strange—these things weren't heavy, yet wearing them felt somewhat exhausting.
The garment had two rows of fastening straps in the back to secure the two wobbling masses in front. Wang Daxia reached behind, fingers hooking the straps, but couldn't tighten them properly. Soon, his hands felt as if soaked in aged vinegar—completely sore.
Knock knock knock!
Someone rapped at the door. A voice called out, "It's me."
It was Wei Caiwei's voice. Wang Daxia hurriedly threw on a robe and opened the door.
Wei Caiwei carried her makeup case. "Let me style your hair into a married woman's bun."
With no one around, Wang Daxia grew bold. He opened his outer robe, revealing the bright red breast garment. "Help me put on this little garment first. I can't fasten it in the back."
The young man's body was somewhat slender but well-muscled under the clothes. Wei Caiwei's fingers brushed over Wang Daxia's scapulae that spread like butterfly wings as she gently smoothed the two rows of straps. Then she grabbed two straps and pulled hard.
"Ah!"
Wang Daxia let out a moan that could easily be misinterpreted. "So suffocating! It's tied too tight—I can't breathe properly. Loosen it a bit."
Wei Caiwei said, "No. If it's any looser, they'll wobble when you walk. People would point and say you're a seductress trying to lure men."
"No, no, I can't take it. I can't breathe," Wang Daxia protested. "I'm supposed to be a wanton woman who sells both eye veils and her body anyway. A little wobbling would suit my character—the character I'm pretending to be."Wei Caiwei thought it made sense after hearing this, so she loosened the straps slightly, tied them at the back, and placed Wang Daxia’s hand on the longer strap. "When you want to take it off, just pull this strap and it will come undone. Be careful not to pull the wrong one, or it’ll only get tighter."
In her previous life, whenever Eunuch Wang was home, he would help her tie the straps of her waist cincher every morning.
Now, in this life, it’s me helping you instead. Wei Caiwei felt deeply moved.
Once the waist cincher was on, Wei Caiwei dressed him in a white satin jacket with a standing collar that wrapped around the neck, concealing the Adam’s apple. The collar was fastened with two rows of brass buttons.
Wang Daxia grabbed his neck, complaining, "This standing collar is so uncomfortable. It’s exhausting to turn my head, and my neck feels stiff. Lu Ying wears this kind of clothing all year round—how does she endure it?"
Wei Caiwei replied, "Once you get used to the waist cincher, the discomfort of a standing collar is nothing."
Wang Daxia sighed, "Being a woman is truly difficult."
After putting on the white satin jacket, she layered it with a blue vest, then added a fashionable horsehair bustle. Over the bustle, she tied a deep blue horse-face skirt. The skirt flared out with the support of the bustle, and with Wang Daxia’s slender waist, the combination of a tiny waist and a full skirt made him resemble a blue-and-white porcelain vase.
He actually looks quite good! Wei Caiwei admired her dead husband.
Wang Daxia twirled in front of the mirror. "Not bad, but it’s a bit too plain. Let’s try a silver-red vest instead."
Wei Caiwei refused. "Your family is poor—otherwise, you wouldn’t have to sell yourself to make ends meet. Silver-red fabric is too expensive; you might blow your cover."
Wang Daxia reluctantly gave up. Wei Caiwei then styled his hair into a round bun and topped it with a slightly worn gray rabbit fur headband.
She took out an eyebrow razor and shaped his thick brows into delicate, curved willow-leaf arches. She dusted his face with a layer of lead powder, dipped a hairpin into rouge, applied a bit to his lips, then rubbed the remaining rouge between her palms and lightly patted it onto his cheeks.
Wang Daxia closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation of Wei Caiwei’s hands moving across his face.
"All done. Take a look for yourself."
Wang Daxia opened his eyes. The person in the mirror had a rosy complexion, peach-blossom cheeks, and eyes full of charm.
"Satisfied?" Wei Caiwei asked.
Wang Daxia flipped the mirror face down. "I’d better stop looking, or I might fall in love with myself."
Wei Caiwei: "..."
Finally, it was time to choose an eye veil. Unsurprisingly, Wang Daxia picked a peach-colored one. "This one’s pretty. As a man, I’d normally be too embarrassed to wear such a bright eye veil. But today, I’m dressed as a woman—it’s my one chance to wear a red eye veil openly. Please indulge me."
Having said that, both Wei Caiwei and Lu Ying silently acquiesced.
Wang Daxia excitedly put on the red eye veil. "How do I look?"
Wei Caiwei and Lu Ying: It does look good, but it clearly gives off the vibe of a disreputable woman. Ironically, that’s exactly the type the lecherous Taoist prefers.
At the Three Thoroughfares Inn, Lu Ying and the others had arrived in disguise. Wang Daxia ordered a pot of tea and the cheapest tea snacks, then took a seat. The lecherous Taoist seemed to have been delayed by something and didn’t rush into the inn until nearly noon.
He entered wearing a black eye veil and immediately spotted the buxom woman sitting alone in the main hall, surrounded by a pile of melon seed shells.Although he hadn't seen the woman's lovely face yesterday—she still wore a silver-red eye veil—the wretched Taoist was certain it was her! There were few single women in the entire hall, and besides, her chest was the largest and most upright, like two risen steamed buns. A stack of eye veils lay on the table, which was their prearranged signal for recognition.
The wretched Taoist walked over and, under the cover of his sleeve, handed three taels of silver to Wang Daxia. Then he went to the counter and requested a room.
After the Taoist took the key and went upstairs, Wang Daxia swayed his slender waist and followed from a distance.
The two entered the room one after the other. The Taoist pressed Wang Daxia against the door and tried to kiss him, but Wang Daxia turned his face away. "You wretched ghost, you've kept me waiting so long! I've drunk two pots of tea and now I'm starving. Order a table of food and a pot of good wine. Once I'm full, we can get down to business."
The Taoist had no choice but to call the waiter to immediately bring up a table of fine wine and dishes.
The Taoist tried to get handsy again, saying, "Take off your eye veil. There are no outsiders in the room—let me have a good look at your pretty face."
Wang Daxia replied, "If we're taking them off, we do it together. It's not like I haven't seen your face yesterday—why are you still hiding it?"
The Taoist thought this made sense, so he removed his black eye veil and threw it to the ground. "Your turn."
Wang Daxia giggled, "Come catch me first! If you catch me, not only will I take off the eye veil, but you can do whatever you want, Taoist!"
The Taoist chased Wang Daxia around the room, the two playing and circling the table. Just then, someone knocked on the door. "Honored guest, the wine and food are ready."
"So fast?" The Taoist grew suspicious.
Wang Daxia urged, "Hurry and open the door to let them bring it in. Once I'm full, we can get down to business—I'm hungry!"
The Taoist opened the door, only to be caught off guard by a kick to the chest from the newcomer, sending him to the floor.
Commander Wu, wearing an eye veil, reeking of alcohol, and dressed in a greasy, dirty cotton robe, brandished a butcher's knife. Disguised as a common butcher, he had come to catch them in the act. He shouted, "You adulterous scoundrels! Today, I've caught you red-handed!"
Author's note: Now everyone should understand why I named this NPC "Commander Wu." He's a combination of Wu Dalang and Wu Song, created specifically for this honey trap scene. Wang Daxia is the male version of Pan Jinlian.
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